¹«·á ·¹º§Å×½ºÆ® ¹Þ°í °­»çÆò°¡ ³²±â¸é 1,OOO¿ø ÄíÆù Áï½Ã Àû¸³!

Ȥ½Ã »çÀÌÆ®¿¡¼± ãÁö ¸øÇÑ ±Ã±ÝÇÑ Á¡ÀÌ ÀÖÀ¸¼¼¿ä?
³²°ÜÁֽŠÀ̸ÞÀÏÀ» ÅëÇØ ´äº¯ µå¸®°Ú½À´Ï´Ù.

¹®ÀÇÇϽŠ³»¿ëÀÌ ¹®ÀÚ·Î ¹ß¼ÛµÇ¿À´Ï
¿¬¶ôó¸¦ ³²°ÜÁÖ¼¼¿ä.
¾÷¹«½Ã°£ ¿ù~±Ý ¿ÀÀü9½Ã~¿ÀÈÄ6½Ã
(Á¡½É½Ã°£ ³·12½Ã~¿ÀÈÄ1½Ã)

¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ °Ô½ÃÆÇ

¿µ¾î ¸»Çϱâ¿Í ¾²±â¸¦ µ¿½Ã¿¡ Àâ´Â´Ù!

ÀڽŠÀÖ°Ô ¾µ ¼ö ÀÖ´Â ¿µÀÛ¹®À» À§ÇØ ÆÄ¿öÀ×±Û¸®½¬ ¼ö¾÷À» ¼ö°­ÇϽôÂ
ȸ¿ø´Ôµé²² ¹«·á·Î Á¦°øÇص帮´Â ºÎ°¡ ¼­ºñ½º·Î, Àü¹® ºÐ¾ß¸¦ Á¦¿ÜÇÑ ÀÚÀ¯ ÁÖÁ¦
¶Ç´Â °­»ç´ÔÀÌ ³»Áֽô °úÁ¦¸¦ ȸ¿ø´Ô²²¼­ ¿µ¾î·Î ÀÛ¼ºÇØÁֽøé,
´ã´ç °­»ç ´Ô²²¼­ ¡®¹®¹ý ¿À·ù ±³Á¤¡¯ °ú ¡®´õ ³ªÀº ¿µ¾î½Ä Ç¥Çö¡¯À¸·Î ±³Á¤ÇØÁÖ´Â
¼­ºñ½º ÀÔ´Ï´Ù.

Homework

ÀÛ¼ºÀÚ: ±è*¿ì
2023-11-13 1807

ȸ¿ø´ÔÀÇ ¿µÀÛ¹®

Hi.
I was so pleased to see your better condition today.
Your voice and facial expression became nearly normal, I think.
I hope your illness will be gone completely.
As I told you, today is colder than other days.
And, it made a situation of decreased patients today.
These days, I have been sick of my work.
Maybe, it was caused by last vacation's complication.
I just want to have a break everyday.
What about you?Have you ever felt like this emotion?
We can say this as a"slump".
Basically, I am diligent, but also always want to be free from restricted lifestyle.
Sometimes, I want to spend all my time playing games or singing or traveling alone.
As we both know, it's impossible to do it right now.
Meanwhile, I need more exercise absolutely to keep my health.
I realized the need of exercise long time ago, nevertheless, I have not done it with many unreasonable excuses.
Today is Dr.MJ's birthday.
He wants to have a good profit for birthday gift, but it doesn't seem to be easy.
See you.

°­»ç´ÔÀÇ Ã·»è±³Á¤ ³»¿ë

Hello, Dr. Kim!

Thank you so much for submitting this homework answer early in the day. I snoozed off for quite some time trying to catch up with all the exhaustion of my weekend. Nevertheless, I am happy to give my grammar suggestions and comments as well.


First of, thank you for observing my status. I felt like I was a Zombie last week. Of course, I may have wanted to rest but there was no way I can do that. Right now, I have been feeling so much better. Thank you for your kind consideration as well as concern on my well-being.


Happy birthday to Dr. MJ! If money is everything that makes him happy, he must be sad this season because it is already  a given that people will not go out that much due to the weather. I hope Dr. MJ can learn to be relaxed and calm about financial conditions.


Now about slumps- we are human beings who feel drained and exhausted from our routines. Of course, I want to break away from the habitual or routine work. However, since I have many kinds of work, I meet various people, go to different places, and feel many sorts of feelings. As a result, I still love my usual routine at the same time, the uniqueness of my other work. Sometimes, the change of working environment makes us feel more alive.


Maybe you need to rearrange your table or furniture at work to tweak it a bit and give you a new perspective.


In reality, we cannot quit on what we need to do. Our consistency determines our success.


Your sentences were correct, clear, a variation of many patterns, and were organized in a systematic sequence. Overall, excellent piece of writing!


See you tomorrow morning!

-T. Donna~


Hi.

>> Correct!

I was so pleased to see your better condition today.

>> Correct!


Your voice and facial expression became nearly normal, I think.

>> Correct!


I hope your illness will be gone completely.

>> Correct!


As I told you, today is colder than other days.

>> Correct!


And, it made a situation of decreased patients today.

>> Correct!


These days, I have been sick of my work.

>> Correct!


Maybe, it was caused by last vacation's complication.

>> Maybe, it was caused by the last vacation's complication.

I just want to have a break everyday.

>> Correct!


What about you?Have you ever felt like this emotion?

>> Correct!


We can say this as a"slump".

>> Correct!


Basically, I am diligent, but also always want to be free from restricted lifestyle.

>> Basically, I am diligent, but also always want to be free from a restricted lifestyle.


Sometimes, I want to spend all my time playing games or singing or traveling alone.

>> Correct!


As we both know, it's impossible to do it right now.

>> Correct!


Meanwhile, I need more exercise absolutely to keep my health.

>> Correct!

I realized the need of exercise long time ago, nevertheless, I have not done it with many unreasonable excuses.

>> I realized the need of exercise a long time ago, nevertheless, I have not done it with many unreasonable excuses.


Today is Dr.MJ's birthday.

>> Correct!


He wants to have a good profit for birthday gift, but it doesn't seem to be easy.

>> Correct!

See you.

>> Correct!

 

¹øÈ£ Á¦¸ñ ±Û¾´ÀÌ °ø°³ »óÅ µî·ÏÀÏ Á¶È¸¼ö
130512 homework ±è*¿¬ ¿Ï·á 2023-08-25 1571
130511 homework 08.25 ÃÖ*Ç ¿Ï·á 2023-08-25 2127
130510 Homework ±Ç*¹Ì ¿Ï·á 2023-08-25 0
130509 What\'s your thought on news articles having blurred photos,... ±è*¹Î ¿Ï·á 2023-08-25 3
130508 What\'s your favorite snack at the movies? ¹Ú*Çö ¿Ï·á 2023-08-25 3175
130507 If you will learn a new language, what would it be and why? ½Å*¼· ¿Ï·á 2023-08-25 2358
130506 homework Á¤*È£ ¿Ï·á 2023-08-25 0
130505 homework Á¤*È£ ¿Ï·á 2023-08-25 0
130504 What safety measures can we do to keep ourselves safe from... Á¤*¾Æ ¿Ï·á 2023-08-25 2432
130503 Why do students in Korea need to go to many academies? ¾Ù* ¿Ï·á 2023-08-25 0
130502 What can your government do to alleviate with the problem of... ÀÌ*ÁÖ ¿Ï·á 2023-08-25 2
130501 Homework ·ù*¿ì ¿Ï·á 2023-08-25 1833
130500 Homework ÇÏ*¸² ¿Ï·á 2023-08-25 1
130499 WRITING TASK: What is your favorite activity with your mother? ÀÓ*Áö ¿Ï·á 2023-08-25 2
130498 Writing Exercise: How do you manage your work-life balance? ¼­*ÅÃ ¿Ï·á 2023-08-25 1838
130497 What danger does your country pose to the global environment? ±Ç*Áø ¿Ï·á 2023-08-25 0
130496 Describe a perfect weekend for you ÁÖ*Áø ¿Ï·á 2023-08-25 1
130495 Do you have any exercise or fitness goals that you¡¯d like to... º¹*ÈÆ ¿Ï·á 2023-08-25 1
130494 What do you think is the biggest change in how families are in... ÀÌ*¾ç ¿Ï·á 2023-08-25 2053
130493 Homework ¼Û*ÁØ ¿Ï·á 2023-08-25 1627

HOW TO USE IT?

[¸¶ÀÌÆäÀÌÁö > ¼ö¾÷ ³»¿ë º¸±â > ÇнÀ Ķ¸°´õ > ¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ ¹öÆ° Ŭ¸¯]

¼ö¾÷ Ƚ¼ö¸¸Å­ ¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ °Ô½ÃÆÇÀÌ »ý¼ºµÇ¸ç,
Áö³­ ³¯Â¥¿¡µµ °Ô½Ã ÇÒ ¼ö ÀÖ½À´Ï´Ù.

ÁÖ5ȸ ¼ö¾÷ : ¿ù 20ȸ ÀÌ¿ë °¡´É
ÁÖ3ȸ ¼ö¾÷ : ¿ù 12ȸ ÀÌ¿ë °¡´É
ÁÖ2ȸ ¼ö¾÷ : ¿ù 08ȸ ÀÌ¿ë °¡´É
01
±³Á¤ ³»¿ëÀº ÃÖ´ë 1,000byte±îÁö ¿Ã¸± ¼ö ÀÖ½À´Ï´Ù.

÷ºÎ ÆÄÀÏÀº ¿øÈ°ÇÑ Ã·»èÀ» À§ÇÑ Âü°íÀÚ·á·Î »ç¿ëµÉ »Ó,
ÆÄÀÏ¿¡ ´ëÇÑ Ã·»èÀº ºÒ°¡´É ÇÕ´Ï´Ù.

¾÷·Îµå °¡´ÉÇÑ Ã·ºÎ ÆÄÀÏÀº ÃÖ´ë 2mb±îÁöÀ̸ç,
÷ºÎ ÇÒ ¼ö ÀÖ´Â ÆÄÀÏ Çü½ÄÀº ´ÙÀ½°ú °°½À´Ï´Ù.

¹®¼­ - PDF, TXT, DOCX,
À̹ÌÁö - JPEG, PNG, GIF
02
Àü¹® ºÐ¾ß¸¦ Á¦¿ÜÇÑ È¸¿ø´ÔÀÌ Á÷Á¢ ÀÛ¼ºÇÑ ±Û¸¸
÷»èÀÌ °¡´ÉÇϸç,

¿Ã·ÁÁֽŠ±ÛÀÇ °­»ç´Ô ÷»èÀº 24½Ã°£ À̳»¿¡
¿Ï·á µÇ´Â °ÍÀ» ¿øÄ¢À¸·Î ÇÏ°í ÀÖ½À´Ï´Ù.
03
ÇÏ·ç °Ô½Ã °¡´ÉÇÑ ±ÛÀº 3ȸ±îÁö À̸ç,
Á¾·áµÈ ¼ö¾÷ÀÇ ¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ °Ô½ÃÆÇÀº
ÀÌ¿ëÀÌ ¾î·Á¿î Á¡ ¾çÇØ ºÎŹ µå¸³´Ï´Ù.
04