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자신 있게 쓸 수 있는 영작문을 위해 파워잉글리쉬 수업을 수강하시는
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담당 강사 님께서 ‘문법 오류 교정’ 과 ‘더 나은 영어식 표현’으로 교정해주는
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Homework

작성자: 김*우
2023-11-13 1691

회원님의 영작문

Hi.
I was so pleased to see your better condition today.
Your voice and facial expression became nearly normal, I think.
I hope your illness will be gone completely.
As I told you, today is colder than other days.
And, it made a situation of decreased patients today.
These days, I have been sick of my work.
Maybe, it was caused by last vacation's complication.
I just want to have a break everyday.
What about you?Have you ever felt like this emotion?
We can say this as a"slump".
Basically, I am diligent, but also always want to be free from restricted lifestyle.
Sometimes, I want to spend all my time playing games or singing or traveling alone.
As we both know, it's impossible to do it right now.
Meanwhile, I need more exercise absolutely to keep my health.
I realized the need of exercise long time ago, nevertheless, I have not done it with many unreasonable excuses.
Today is Dr.MJ's birthday.
He wants to have a good profit for birthday gift, but it doesn't seem to be easy.
See you.

강사님의 첨삭교정 내용

Hello, Dr. Kim!

Thank you so much for submitting this homework answer early in the day. I snoozed off for quite some time trying to catch up with all the exhaustion of my weekend. Nevertheless, I am happy to give my grammar suggestions and comments as well.


First of, thank you for observing my status. I felt like I was a Zombie last week. Of course, I may have wanted to rest but there was no way I can do that. Right now, I have been feeling so much better. Thank you for your kind consideration as well as concern on my well-being.


Happy birthday to Dr. MJ! If money is everything that makes him happy, he must be sad this season because it is already  a given that people will not go out that much due to the weather. I hope Dr. MJ can learn to be relaxed and calm about financial conditions.


Now about slumps- we are human beings who feel drained and exhausted from our routines. Of course, I want to break away from the habitual or routine work. However, since I have many kinds of work, I meet various people, go to different places, and feel many sorts of feelings. As a result, I still love my usual routine at the same time, the uniqueness of my other work. Sometimes, the change of working environment makes us feel more alive.


Maybe you need to rearrange your table or furniture at work to tweak it a bit and give you a new perspective.


In reality, we cannot quit on what we need to do. Our consistency determines our success.


Your sentences were correct, clear, a variation of many patterns, and were organized in a systematic sequence. Overall, excellent piece of writing!


See you tomorrow morning!

-T. Donna~


Hi.

>> Correct!

I was so pleased to see your better condition today.

>> Correct!


Your voice and facial expression became nearly normal, I think.

>> Correct!


I hope your illness will be gone completely.

>> Correct!


As I told you, today is colder than other days.

>> Correct!


And, it made a situation of decreased patients today.

>> Correct!


These days, I have been sick of my work.

>> Correct!


Maybe, it was caused by last vacation's complication.

>> Maybe, it was caused by the last vacation's complication.

I just want to have a break everyday.

>> Correct!


What about you?Have you ever felt like this emotion?

>> Correct!


We can say this as a"slump".

>> Correct!


Basically, I am diligent, but also always want to be free from restricted lifestyle.

>> Basically, I am diligent, but also always want to be free from a restricted lifestyle.


Sometimes, I want to spend all my time playing games or singing or traveling alone.

>> Correct!


As we both know, it's impossible to do it right now.

>> Correct!


Meanwhile, I need more exercise absolutely to keep my health.

>> Correct!

I realized the need of exercise long time ago, nevertheless, I have not done it with many unreasonable excuses.

>> I realized the need of exercise a long time ago, nevertheless, I have not done it with many unreasonable excuses.


Today is Dr.MJ's birthday.

>> Correct!


He wants to have a good profit for birthday gift, but it doesn't seem to be easy.

>> Correct!

See you.

>> Correct!

 

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