¹«·á ·¹º§Å×½ºÆ® ¹Þ°í °­»çÆò°¡ ³²±â¸é 1,OOO¿ø ÄíÆù Áï½Ã Àû¸³!

Ȥ½Ã »çÀÌÆ®¿¡¼± ãÁö ¸øÇÑ ±Ã±ÝÇÑ Á¡ÀÌ ÀÖÀ¸¼¼¿ä?
³²°ÜÁֽŠÀ̸ÞÀÏÀ» ÅëÇØ ´äº¯ µå¸®°Ú½À´Ï´Ù.

¹®ÀÇÇϽŠ³»¿ëÀÌ ¹®ÀÚ·Î ¹ß¼ÛµÇ¿À´Ï
¿¬¶ôó¸¦ ³²°ÜÁÖ¼¼¿ä.
¾÷¹«½Ã°£ ¿ù~±Ý ¿ÀÀü9½Ã~¿ÀÈÄ6½Ã
(Á¡½É½Ã°£ ³·12½Ã~¿ÀÈÄ1½Ã)

¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ °Ô½ÃÆÇ

¿µ¾î ¸»Çϱâ¿Í ¾²±â¸¦ µ¿½Ã¿¡ Àâ´Â´Ù!

ÀڽŠÀÖ°Ô ¾µ ¼ö ÀÖ´Â ¿µÀÛ¹®À» À§ÇØ ÆÄ¿öÀ×±Û¸®½¬ ¼ö¾÷À» ¼ö°­ÇϽôÂ
ȸ¿ø´Ôµé²² ¹«·á·Î Á¦°øÇص帮´Â ºÎ°¡ ¼­ºñ½º·Î, Àü¹® ºÐ¾ß¸¦ Á¦¿ÜÇÑ ÀÚÀ¯ ÁÖÁ¦
¶Ç´Â °­»ç´ÔÀÌ ³»Áֽô °úÁ¦¸¦ ȸ¿ø´Ô²²¼­ ¿µ¾î·Î ÀÛ¼ºÇØÁֽøé,
´ã´ç °­»ç ´Ô²²¼­ ¡®¹®¹ý ¿À·ù ±³Á¤¡¯ °ú ¡®´õ ³ªÀº ¿µ¾î½Ä Ç¥Çö¡¯À¸·Î ±³Á¤ÇØÁÖ´Â
¼­ºñ½º ÀÔ´Ï´Ù.

Youth should not use face book

ÀÛ¼ºÀÚ: ±è*¹Î
2023-11-06 2997

ȸ¿ø´ÔÀÇ ¿µÀÛ¹®

First of all, youth use of face book like sns can lead to many bad consequences. For example, youth's uses of sns can lead to less homework, because they cannot concentrate in their works so eventually, there score will drop.
Second of all, in sns there can be many bullying happening. In sns there are many bullying happen so many students are commiting suicide. So I thinks that we should regulate sns to stop student bullying other.
Third it can has some vioent information that children should not see.

°­»ç´ÔÀÇ Ã·»è±³Á¤ ³»¿ë

Good day, Jude! Thank you for writing your composition. I feel happy every time you send your composition. it is also good that you share your ideas and opinions in your composition. We will talk more about Facebook in class. I will see you in class then. Keep writing! ~T. Lyn
First of all, youth use of face book like sns can lead to many bad consequences. 
>>First of all, teenagers liking and using Facebook can have many bad consequences.
For example, youth's uses of sns can lead to less homework, because they cannot concentrate in their works so eventually, there score will drop.
>>For example, teenagers' use of social medica may cause them to do less homework, which can lead to lower grades because they can't focus well on their studies.
Second of all, in sns there can be many bullying happening. 
>>Second, a lot of bullying can happen on social media.
In sns there are many bullying happen so many students are commiting suicide. 
>>There is a lot of school violence and many students commit suicide.
So I thinks that we should regulate sns to stop student bullying other.
>>So I think that social media should be regulated to prevent students from bullying others.
Third it can has some vioent information that children should not see.
>>Lastly, social media may contain violent information that children should not see.
¹øÈ£ Á¦¸ñ ±Û¾´ÀÌ °ø°³ »óÅ µî·ÏÀÏ Á¶È¸¼ö
131575 Diary ±è*¿¬ ¿Ï·á 2023-10-11 0
131574 Homework ±è* ¿Ï·á 2023-10-11 1559
131573 homework ±è* ¿Ï·á 2023-10-11 2098
131572 Homework ·ù*¿ì ¿Ï·á 2023-10-11 1922
131571 homework_231011 ÇÑ*·Ï ¿Ï·á 2023-10-11 2167
131570 What happened during your conference? ±è*¾Æ ¿Ï·á 2023-10-11 2
131569 homework ¾È*¿¬ ¿Ï·á 2023-10-11 2018
131568 As an employee, what is your greatest memory? ÀÌ*ÅÂ ¿Ï·á 2023-10-11 2062
131567 ¡°Is there really a big difference in going to a private school... ÀÌ*ÅÂ ¿Ï·á 2023-10-11 2070
131566 What is the importance of education? ÀÌ*ÅÂ ¿Ï·á 2023-10-11 2109
131565 What is success for you? ÀÌ*ÅÂ ¿Ï·á 2023-10-11 1676
131564 Where do you usually have lunch at work? ÀÌ*Á¤ ¿Ï·á 2023-10-11 1557
131563 Second class home work ±è*Çý ¿Ï·á 2023-10-11 2459
131562 what usually keeps you busy? ÀÌ*Á¤ ¿Ï·á 2023-10-11 2
131561 my expectations from class Á¤*¾È ¿Ï·á 2023-10-11 2
131560 Will people eventually stop believing in religion? ¾ç*¿¬ ¿Ï·á 2023-10-11 1542
131559 homework ¼Õ*Èñ ¿Ï·á 2023-10-11 1360
131558 Homework ½Å*È­ ¿Ï·á 2023-10-11 1751
131557 Letter ±Ç*Á¤ ¿Ï·á 2023-10-11 1
131556 10.Oct.2023 ±è*Á¤ ¿Ï·á 2023-10-11 1

HOW TO USE IT?

[¸¶ÀÌÆäÀÌÁö > ¼ö¾÷ ³»¿ë º¸±â > ÇнÀ Ķ¸°´õ > ¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ ¹öÆ° Ŭ¸¯]

¼ö¾÷ Ƚ¼ö¸¸Å­ ¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ °Ô½ÃÆÇÀÌ »ý¼ºµÇ¸ç,
Áö³­ ³¯Â¥¿¡µµ °Ô½Ã ÇÒ ¼ö ÀÖ½À´Ï´Ù.

ÁÖ5ȸ ¼ö¾÷ : ¿ù 20ȸ ÀÌ¿ë °¡´É
ÁÖ3ȸ ¼ö¾÷ : ¿ù 12ȸ ÀÌ¿ë °¡´É
ÁÖ2ȸ ¼ö¾÷ : ¿ù 08ȸ ÀÌ¿ë °¡´É
01
±³Á¤ ³»¿ëÀº ÃÖ´ë 1,000byte±îÁö ¿Ã¸± ¼ö ÀÖ½À´Ï´Ù.

÷ºÎ ÆÄÀÏÀº ¿øÈ°ÇÑ Ã·»èÀ» À§ÇÑ Âü°íÀÚ·á·Î »ç¿ëµÉ »Ó,
ÆÄÀÏ¿¡ ´ëÇÑ Ã·»èÀº ºÒ°¡´É ÇÕ´Ï´Ù.

¾÷·Îµå °¡´ÉÇÑ Ã·ºÎ ÆÄÀÏÀº ÃÖ´ë 2mb±îÁöÀ̸ç,
÷ºÎ ÇÒ ¼ö ÀÖ´Â ÆÄÀÏ Çü½ÄÀº ´ÙÀ½°ú °°½À´Ï´Ù.

¹®¼­ - PDF, TXT, DOCX,
À̹ÌÁö - JPEG, PNG, GIF
02
Àü¹® ºÐ¾ß¸¦ Á¦¿ÜÇÑ È¸¿ø´ÔÀÌ Á÷Á¢ ÀÛ¼ºÇÑ ±Û¸¸
÷»èÀÌ °¡´ÉÇϸç,

¿Ã·ÁÁֽŠ±ÛÀÇ °­»ç´Ô ÷»èÀº 24½Ã°£ À̳»¿¡
¿Ï·á µÇ´Â °ÍÀ» ¿øÄ¢À¸·Î ÇÏ°í ÀÖ½À´Ï´Ù.
03
ÇÏ·ç °Ô½Ã °¡´ÉÇÑ ±ÛÀº 3ȸ±îÁö À̸ç,
Á¾·áµÈ ¼ö¾÷ÀÇ ¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ °Ô½ÃÆÇÀº
ÀÌ¿ëÀÌ ¾î·Á¿î Á¡ ¾çÇØ ºÎŹ µå¸³´Ï´Ù.
04