¹«·á ·¹º§Å×½ºÆ® ¹Þ°í °­»çÆò°¡ ³²±â¸é 1,OOO¿ø ÄíÆù Áï½Ã Àû¸³!

Ȥ½Ã »çÀÌÆ®¿¡¼± ãÁö ¸øÇÑ ±Ã±ÝÇÑ Á¡ÀÌ ÀÖÀ¸¼¼¿ä?
³²°ÜÁֽŠÀ̸ÞÀÏÀ» ÅëÇØ ´äº¯ µå¸®°Ú½À´Ï´Ù.

¹®ÀÇÇϽŠ³»¿ëÀÌ ¹®ÀÚ·Î ¹ß¼ÛµÇ¿À´Ï
¿¬¶ôó¸¦ ³²°ÜÁÖ¼¼¿ä.
¾÷¹«½Ã°£ ¿ù~±Ý ¿ÀÀü9½Ã~¿ÀÈÄ6½Ã
(Á¡½É½Ã°£ ³·12½Ã~¿ÀÈÄ1½Ã)

¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ °Ô½ÃÆÇ

¿µ¾î ¸»Çϱâ¿Í ¾²±â¸¦ µ¿½Ã¿¡ Àâ´Â´Ù!

ÀڽŠÀÖ°Ô ¾µ ¼ö ÀÖ´Â ¿µÀÛ¹®À» À§ÇØ ÆÄ¿öÀ×±Û¸®½¬ ¼ö¾÷À» ¼ö°­ÇϽôÂ
ȸ¿ø´Ôµé²² ¹«·á·Î Á¦°øÇص帮´Â ºÎ°¡ ¼­ºñ½º·Î, Àü¹® ºÐ¾ß¸¦ Á¦¿ÜÇÑ ÀÚÀ¯ ÁÖÁ¦
¶Ç´Â °­»ç´ÔÀÌ ³»Áֽô °úÁ¦¸¦ ȸ¿ø´Ô²²¼­ ¿µ¾î·Î ÀÛ¼ºÇØÁֽøé,
´ã´ç °­»ç ´Ô²²¼­ ¡®¹®¹ý ¿À·ù ±³Á¤¡¯ °ú ¡®´õ ³ªÀº ¿µ¾î½Ä Ç¥Çö¡¯À¸·Î ±³Á¤ÇØÁÖ´Â
¼­ºñ½º ÀÔ´Ï´Ù.

Youth should not use face book

ÀÛ¼ºÀÚ: ±è*¹Î
2023-11-06 1521

ȸ¿ø´ÔÀÇ ¿µÀÛ¹®

First of all, youth use of face book like sns can lead to many bad consequences. For example, youth's uses of sns can lead to less homework, because they cannot concentrate in their works so eventually, there score will drop.
Second of all, in sns there can be many bullying happening. In sns there are many bullying happen so many students are commiting suicide. So I thinks that we should regulate sns to stop student bullying other.
Third it can has some vioent information that children should not see.

°­»ç´ÔÀÇ Ã·»è±³Á¤ ³»¿ë

Good day, Jude! Thank you for writing your composition. I feel happy every time you send your composition. it is also good that you share your ideas and opinions in your composition. We will talk more about Facebook in class. I will see you in class then. Keep writing! ~T. Lyn
First of all, youth use of face book like sns can lead to many bad consequences. 
>>First of all, teenagers liking and using Facebook can have many bad consequences.
For example, youth's uses of sns can lead to less homework, because they cannot concentrate in their works so eventually, there score will drop.
>>For example, teenagers' use of social medica may cause them to do less homework, which can lead to lower grades because they can't focus well on their studies.
Second of all, in sns there can be many bullying happening. 
>>Second, a lot of bullying can happen on social media.
In sns there are many bullying happen so many students are commiting suicide. 
>>There is a lot of school violence and many students commit suicide.
So I thinks that we should regulate sns to stop student bullying other.
>>So I think that social media should be regulated to prevent students from bullying others.
Third it can has some vioent information that children should not see.
>>Lastly, social media may contain violent information that children should not see.
¹øÈ£ Á¦¸ñ ±Û¾´ÀÌ °ø°³ »óÅ µî·ÏÀÏ Á¶È¸¼ö
133434 I think the cycling sport is great. ¿À*Çõ ¿Ï·á 2023-12-25 0
133433 Sport ¿°*¿¹ ¿Ï·á 2023-12-25 1
133432 Stress ¿°*¿¹ ¿Ï·á 2023-12-25 1
133431 Please check my diary grammar and sentence!! ±è*Àº ¿Ï·á 2023-12-24 505
133430 Homework ½Å*È­ ¿Ï·á 2023-12-24 837
133429 Homework ½Å*È­ ¿Ï·á 2023-12-24 484
133428 What opinions do you have about cancel culture? ±è*±Ô ¿Ï·á 2023-12-24 1
133427 ¼÷Á¦ ±Ç*Å ¿Ï·á 2023-12-24 493
133426 Please check my diary grammar and sentence!! ±è*Àº ¿Ï·á 2023-12-24 484
133425 Homework ÀÌ*È­ ¿Ï·á 2023-12-23 663
133424 What do you think are the reasons why people commonly use slang... ½Å*¼· ¿Ï·á 2023-12-23 905
133423 What languages do you like or dislike the sound of? ½Å*¼· ¿Ï·á 2023-12-23 551
133422 HOMEWORK: Please write a short paragraph about \"What role would... ¾Ù* ¿Ï·á 2023-12-23 1
133421 How much time do you spend in the morning doing your hair? Do... ±è*¼ø ¿Ï·á 2023-12-22 609
133420 One of the most useful products of technology Àå*¿ø ¿Ï·á 2023-12-22 4
133419 What are some travel tips to make sure that you will enjoy your... ¹®*Çö ¿Ï·á 2023-12-22 948
133418 Homework ±è*¼­ ¿Ï·á 2023-12-22 3
133417 Physical activity ÀÌ*±Ô ¿Ï·á 2023-12-22 518
133416 What¡¯s one gift you¡¯re secretly hoping to receive this year? ¿¡*¹Ì ¿Ï·á 2023-12-22 2
133415 homework ÃÖ*Ç ¿Ï·á 2023-12-22 630

HOW TO USE IT?

[¸¶ÀÌÆäÀÌÁö > ¼ö¾÷ ³»¿ë º¸±â > ÇнÀ Ķ¸°´õ > ¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ ¹öÆ° Ŭ¸¯]

¼ö¾÷ Ƚ¼ö¸¸Å­ ¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ °Ô½ÃÆÇÀÌ »ý¼ºµÇ¸ç,
Áö³­ ³¯Â¥¿¡µµ °Ô½Ã ÇÒ ¼ö ÀÖ½À´Ï´Ù.

ÁÖ5ȸ ¼ö¾÷ : ¿ù 20ȸ ÀÌ¿ë °¡´É
ÁÖ3ȸ ¼ö¾÷ : ¿ù 12ȸ ÀÌ¿ë °¡´É
ÁÖ2ȸ ¼ö¾÷ : ¿ù 08ȸ ÀÌ¿ë °¡´É
01
±³Á¤ ³»¿ëÀº ÃÖ´ë 1,000byte±îÁö ¿Ã¸± ¼ö ÀÖ½À´Ï´Ù.

÷ºÎ ÆÄÀÏÀº ¿øÈ°ÇÑ Ã·»èÀ» À§ÇÑ Âü°íÀÚ·á·Î »ç¿ëµÉ »Ó,
ÆÄÀÏ¿¡ ´ëÇÑ Ã·»èÀº ºÒ°¡´É ÇÕ´Ï´Ù.

¾÷·Îµå °¡´ÉÇÑ Ã·ºÎ ÆÄÀÏÀº ÃÖ´ë 2mb±îÁöÀ̸ç,
÷ºÎ ÇÒ ¼ö ÀÖ´Â ÆÄÀÏ Çü½ÄÀº ´ÙÀ½°ú °°½À´Ï´Ù.

¹®¼­ - PDF, TXT, DOCX,
À̹ÌÁö - JPEG, PNG, GIF
02
Àü¹® ºÐ¾ß¸¦ Á¦¿ÜÇÑ È¸¿ø´ÔÀÌ Á÷Á¢ ÀÛ¼ºÇÑ ±Û¸¸
÷»èÀÌ °¡´ÉÇϸç,

¿Ã·ÁÁֽŠ±ÛÀÇ °­»ç´Ô ÷»èÀº 24½Ã°£ À̳»¿¡
¿Ï·á µÇ´Â °ÍÀ» ¿øÄ¢À¸·Î ÇÏ°í ÀÖ½À´Ï´Ù.
03
ÇÏ·ç °Ô½Ã °¡´ÉÇÑ ±ÛÀº 3ȸ±îÁö À̸ç,
Á¾·áµÈ ¼ö¾÷ÀÇ ¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ °Ô½ÃÆÇÀº
ÀÌ¿ëÀÌ ¾î·Á¿î Á¡ ¾çÇØ ºÎŹ µå¸³´Ï´Ù.
04