¹«·á ·¹º§Å×½ºÆ® ¹Þ°í °­»çÆò°¡ ³²±â¸é 1,OOO¿ø ÄíÆù Áï½Ã Àû¸³!

Ȥ½Ã »çÀÌÆ®¿¡¼± ãÁö ¸øÇÑ ±Ã±ÝÇÑ Á¡ÀÌ ÀÖÀ¸¼¼¿ä?
³²°ÜÁֽŠÀ̸ÞÀÏÀ» ÅëÇØ ´äº¯ µå¸®°Ú½À´Ï´Ù.

¹®ÀÇÇϽŠ³»¿ëÀÌ ¹®ÀÚ·Î ¹ß¼ÛµÇ¿À´Ï
¿¬¶ôó¸¦ ³²°ÜÁÖ¼¼¿ä.
¾÷¹«½Ã°£ ¿ù~±Ý ¿ÀÀü9½Ã~¿ÀÈÄ6½Ã
(Á¡½É½Ã°£ ³·12½Ã~¿ÀÈÄ1½Ã)

¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ °Ô½ÃÆÇ

¿µ¾î ¸»Çϱâ¿Í ¾²±â¸¦ µ¿½Ã¿¡ Àâ´Â´Ù!

ÀڽŠÀÖ°Ô ¾µ ¼ö ÀÖ´Â ¿µÀÛ¹®À» À§ÇØ ÆÄ¿öÀ×±Û¸®½¬ ¼ö¾÷À» ¼ö°­ÇϽôÂ
ȸ¿ø´Ôµé²² ¹«·á·Î Á¦°øÇص帮´Â ºÎ°¡ ¼­ºñ½º·Î, Àü¹® ºÐ¾ß¸¦ Á¦¿ÜÇÑ ÀÚÀ¯ ÁÖÁ¦
¶Ç´Â °­»ç´ÔÀÌ ³»Áֽô °úÁ¦¸¦ ȸ¿ø´Ô²²¼­ ¿µ¾î·Î ÀÛ¼ºÇØÁֽøé,
´ã´ç °­»ç ´Ô²²¼­ ¡®¹®¹ý ¿À·ù ±³Á¤¡¯ °ú ¡®´õ ³ªÀº ¿µ¾î½Ä Ç¥Çö¡¯À¸·Î ±³Á¤ÇØÁÖ´Â
¼­ºñ½º ÀÔ´Ï´Ù.

Homework

ÀÛ¼ºÀÚ: ±è*¿ì
2023-11-05 1303

ȸ¿ø´ÔÀÇ ¿µÀÛ¹®

Hello, T. Donna.
How was your weekend?
Since I worked after my vacation, it was harder for me to work this weekend.
Last vacation in Jeju seemed like a dream.
My family and I had a blast.
We swam in a hotel pool, ate delicious food, and saw beatiful scenary everyday.
Last trip in hawaii had passed almost ten months, so this new trip was precious for my family.
As you know, my wife and I had a hard time this year because of many changes, especially increase of my work.
I thought that we need some chance to heal our wounds of relationship and this family trip worked enough.
The most memorable moment was when we took a picture together in the swimming pool of Parnas hotel.
At that time, we could see a sunset and it was awosome.
The best food was a noodle with pork.
Since we reached the restaurant too late, we almost missed the chance to eat the food.
Every moment in Jeju was full of our happiness.
I can say that Jeju is the best place if we choose to travel Korea.
See you tomorrow.

°­»ç´ÔÀÇ Ã·»è±³Á¤ ³»¿ë

Hi, Dr. Kim!

My weekend was packed with judging an acoustic band contest and emceeing a birthday party. I also drank a non-alcoholic beverage with my radio colleagues. Overall, it was energy-draining, nevertheless, so much fun.

Parnas Hotel was such a paradise. I think it was even better than the view in Hawaii. It was serene, marvelous, scenic, and breathtaking. Since the hotel is new, the amenities are expected to be clean, fresh, and all functioning well. Best of all, it gave you a healing vibe and precious memories with your wife and daughters. As I said, sometimes, the pressure of work gets into us and when we vent it out to our family, it causes some uncomfortable feeling. We need to make amends and make it up through these kinds of activities in one way or another.

After all, the best things in life are not things neither money, but the warmth and reassurance of love coming from our family, nothing else.

When your energy get all too consumed or when you are so stressed, Jeju Island is just one book away with your family. I wish you more beautiful memories for the years to come.

My grammar suggestions were underscored as well my comments. Go over them well. Thank you for the very meaningful writing.

See you then.

-T. Donna~

Hello, T. Donna.
>> Correct!

How was your weekend?
>> Correct!

Since I worked after my vacation, it was harder for me to work this weekend.
>> Correct!

Last vacation in Jeju seemed like a dream.
>> The last vacation in Jeju seemed like a dream.

My family and I had a blast.
>> Correct!

We swam in a hotel pool, ate delicious food, and saw beatiful scenary everyday.
>> Correct! 
Or: beautiful scenery (SPELLING)

Last trip in hawaii had passed almost ten months, so this new trip was precious for my family.
>> The last trip in Hawaii had passed almost ten months, so this new trip was precious for my family.

As you know, my wife and I had a hard time this year because of many changes, especially increase of my work.
>> Correct!
Or: As you know, my wife and I had a hard time this year because of many changes, especially in the increase of my work.

I thought that we need some chance to heal our wounds of relationship and this family trip worked enough.
>> Correct! 

The most memorable moment was when we took a picture together in the swimming pool of Parnas hotel.
>> Correct! 
Or: Parnas Hotel

At that time, we could see a sunset and it was awosome.
>> At that time, we could see the sunset and it was awesome.

The best food was a noodle with pork.
>> The best food was the noodle with pork.

Since we reached the restaurant too late, we almost missed the chance to eat the food.
>> Correct! Very good sentence!

Every moment in Jeju was full of our happiness.
>> Correct!

I can say that Jeju is the best place if we choose to travel Korea.
>> Correct!

See you tomorrow.
>> Correct!
¹øÈ£ Á¦¸ñ ±Û¾´ÀÌ °ø°³ »óÅ µî·ÏÀÏ Á¶È¸¼ö
132100 I don\'t think I\'m going to ask questions because homeless... À±*Çý ¿Ï·á 2023-11-01 1107
132099 Providing the things you need ÀÌ*±Ô ¿Ï·á 2023-11-01 1208
132098 I think all movies are the best. À±*Çý ¿Ï·á 2023-11-01 2676
132097 Yes, the world\'s oceans are dangerous. À±*Çý ¿Ï·á 2023-11-01 969
132096 Pick your favorite food. Describe what you taste, smell, and... ÀÓ*È£ ¿Ï·á 2023-11-01 1396
132095 Which one would you choose, live longer but suffer from more... ±è*¹Î ¿Ï·á 2023-11-01 1
132094 homework ¾È*¿¬ ¿Ï·á 2023-11-01 519
132093 HOMEWORK: Please write a short paragraph about ¡°What is the... ¾Ù* ¿Ï·á 2023-11-01 3
132092 Have you ever said ¡®no¡¯ when you really wanted to say ¡®yes¡¯? ¿¡*¹Ì ¿Ï·á 2023-11-01 1
132091 What musical instruments are unique to our country ¹Ú*À² ¿Ï·á 2023-11-01 561
132090 What are some food combinations that you would like to try? ½Å*¼· ¿Ï·á 2023-11-01 434
132089 WRITING TASK: What is your dream house? ÀÓ*Áö ¿Ï·á 2023-11-01 4
132088 Homework Á¤*ȯ ¿Ï·á 2023-11-01 3
132087 How different are you from best friend? ¿À*Çõ ¿Ï·á 2023-11-01 1
132086 How do you usually make yourself feel better when you feel sick?... ÀÌ*ÁØ ¿Ï·á 2023-11-01 383
132085 What is an appropriate punishment for both male sexual... ÀÌ*ÁÖ ¿Ï·á 2023-11-01 0
132084 Homework ·ù*¿ì ¿Ï·á 2023-11-01 468
132083 homework ¾È*¿¬ ¿Ï·á 2023-11-01 856
132082 How would you like to be identified? ±Ç*Áö ¿Ï·á 2023-11-01 893
132081 homework Á¤*¾È ¿Ï·á 2023-11-01 486

HOW TO USE IT?

[¸¶ÀÌÆäÀÌÁö > ¼ö¾÷ ³»¿ë º¸±â > ÇнÀ Ķ¸°´õ > ¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ ¹öÆ° Ŭ¸¯]

¼ö¾÷ Ƚ¼ö¸¸Å­ ¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ °Ô½ÃÆÇÀÌ »ý¼ºµÇ¸ç,
Áö³­ ³¯Â¥¿¡µµ °Ô½Ã ÇÒ ¼ö ÀÖ½À´Ï´Ù.

ÁÖ5ȸ ¼ö¾÷ : ¿ù 20ȸ ÀÌ¿ë °¡´É
ÁÖ3ȸ ¼ö¾÷ : ¿ù 12ȸ ÀÌ¿ë °¡´É
ÁÖ2ȸ ¼ö¾÷ : ¿ù 08ȸ ÀÌ¿ë °¡´É
01
±³Á¤ ³»¿ëÀº ÃÖ´ë 1,000byte±îÁö ¿Ã¸± ¼ö ÀÖ½À´Ï´Ù.

÷ºÎ ÆÄÀÏÀº ¿øÈ°ÇÑ Ã·»èÀ» À§ÇÑ Âü°íÀÚ·á·Î »ç¿ëµÉ »Ó,
ÆÄÀÏ¿¡ ´ëÇÑ Ã·»èÀº ºÒ°¡´É ÇÕ´Ï´Ù.

¾÷·Îµå °¡´ÉÇÑ Ã·ºÎ ÆÄÀÏÀº ÃÖ´ë 2mb±îÁöÀ̸ç,
÷ºÎ ÇÒ ¼ö ÀÖ´Â ÆÄÀÏ Çü½ÄÀº ´ÙÀ½°ú °°½À´Ï´Ù.

¹®¼­ - PDF, TXT, DOCX,
À̹ÌÁö - JPEG, PNG, GIF
02
Àü¹® ºÐ¾ß¸¦ Á¦¿ÜÇÑ È¸¿ø´ÔÀÌ Á÷Á¢ ÀÛ¼ºÇÑ ±Û¸¸
÷»èÀÌ °¡´ÉÇϸç,

¿Ã·ÁÁֽŠ±ÛÀÇ °­»ç´Ô ÷»èÀº 24½Ã°£ À̳»¿¡
¿Ï·á µÇ´Â °ÍÀ» ¿øÄ¢À¸·Î ÇÏ°í ÀÖ½À´Ï´Ù.
03
ÇÏ·ç °Ô½Ã °¡´ÉÇÑ ±ÛÀº 3ȸ±îÁö À̸ç,
Á¾·áµÈ ¼ö¾÷ÀÇ ¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ °Ô½ÃÆÇÀº
ÀÌ¿ëÀÌ ¾î·Á¿î Á¡ ¾çÇØ ºÎŹ µå¸³´Ï´Ù.
04