¹«·á ·¹º§Å×½ºÆ® ¹Þ°í °­»çÆò°¡ ³²±â¸é 1,OOO¿ø ÄíÆù Áï½Ã Àû¸³!

Ȥ½Ã »çÀÌÆ®¿¡¼± ãÁö ¸øÇÑ ±Ã±ÝÇÑ Á¡ÀÌ ÀÖÀ¸¼¼¿ä?
³²°ÜÁֽŠÀ̸ÞÀÏÀ» ÅëÇØ ´äº¯ µå¸®°Ú½À´Ï´Ù.

¹®ÀÇÇϽŠ³»¿ëÀÌ ¹®ÀÚ·Î ¹ß¼ÛµÇ¿À´Ï
¿¬¶ôó¸¦ ³²°ÜÁÖ¼¼¿ä.
¾÷¹«½Ã°£ ¿ù~±Ý ¿ÀÀü9½Ã~¿ÀÈÄ6½Ã
(Á¡½É½Ã°£ ³·12½Ã~¿ÀÈÄ1½Ã)

¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ °Ô½ÃÆÇ

¿µ¾î ¸»Çϱâ¿Í ¾²±â¸¦ µ¿½Ã¿¡ Àâ´Â´Ù!

ÀڽŠÀÖ°Ô ¾µ ¼ö ÀÖ´Â ¿µÀÛ¹®À» À§ÇØ ÆÄ¿öÀ×±Û¸®½¬ ¼ö¾÷À» ¼ö°­ÇϽôÂ
ȸ¿ø´Ôµé²² ¹«·á·Î Á¦°øÇص帮´Â ºÎ°¡ ¼­ºñ½º·Î, Àü¹® ºÐ¾ß¸¦ Á¦¿ÜÇÑ ÀÚÀ¯ ÁÖÁ¦
¶Ç´Â °­»ç´ÔÀÌ ³»Áֽô °úÁ¦¸¦ ȸ¿ø´Ô²²¼­ ¿µ¾î·Î ÀÛ¼ºÇØÁֽøé,
´ã´ç °­»ç ´Ô²²¼­ ¡®¹®¹ý ¿À·ù ±³Á¤¡¯ °ú ¡®´õ ³ªÀº ¿µ¾î½Ä Ç¥Çö¡¯À¸·Î ±³Á¤ÇØÁÖ´Â
¼­ºñ½º ÀÔ´Ï´Ù.

Homework

ÀÛ¼ºÀÚ: ±è*¿ì
2023-11-05 3368

ȸ¿ø´ÔÀÇ ¿µÀÛ¹®

Hello, T. Donna.
How was your weekend?
Since I worked after my vacation, it was harder for me to work this weekend.
Last vacation in Jeju seemed like a dream.
My family and I had a blast.
We swam in a hotel pool, ate delicious food, and saw beatiful scenary everyday.
Last trip in hawaii had passed almost ten months, so this new trip was precious for my family.
As you know, my wife and I had a hard time this year because of many changes, especially increase of my work.
I thought that we need some chance to heal our wounds of relationship and this family trip worked enough.
The most memorable moment was when we took a picture together in the swimming pool of Parnas hotel.
At that time, we could see a sunset and it was awosome.
The best food was a noodle with pork.
Since we reached the restaurant too late, we almost missed the chance to eat the food.
Every moment in Jeju was full of our happiness.
I can say that Jeju is the best place if we choose to travel Korea.
See you tomorrow.

°­»ç´ÔÀÇ Ã·»è±³Á¤ ³»¿ë

Hi, Dr. Kim!

My weekend was packed with judging an acoustic band contest and emceeing a birthday party. I also drank a non-alcoholic beverage with my radio colleagues. Overall, it was energy-draining, nevertheless, so much fun.

Parnas Hotel was such a paradise. I think it was even better than the view in Hawaii. It was serene, marvelous, scenic, and breathtaking. Since the hotel is new, the amenities are expected to be clean, fresh, and all functioning well. Best of all, it gave you a healing vibe and precious memories with your wife and daughters. As I said, sometimes, the pressure of work gets into us and when we vent it out to our family, it causes some uncomfortable feeling. We need to make amends and make it up through these kinds of activities in one way or another.

After all, the best things in life are not things neither money, but the warmth and reassurance of love coming from our family, nothing else.

When your energy get all too consumed or when you are so stressed, Jeju Island is just one book away with your family. I wish you more beautiful memories for the years to come.

My grammar suggestions were underscored as well my comments. Go over them well. Thank you for the very meaningful writing.

See you then.

-T. Donna~

Hello, T. Donna.
>> Correct!

How was your weekend?
>> Correct!

Since I worked after my vacation, it was harder for me to work this weekend.
>> Correct!

Last vacation in Jeju seemed like a dream.
>> The last vacation in Jeju seemed like a dream.

My family and I had a blast.
>> Correct!

We swam in a hotel pool, ate delicious food, and saw beatiful scenary everyday.
>> Correct! 
Or: beautiful scenery (SPELLING)

Last trip in hawaii had passed almost ten months, so this new trip was precious for my family.
>> The last trip in Hawaii had passed almost ten months, so this new trip was precious for my family.

As you know, my wife and I had a hard time this year because of many changes, especially increase of my work.
>> Correct!
Or: As you know, my wife and I had a hard time this year because of many changes, especially in the increase of my work.

I thought that we need some chance to heal our wounds of relationship and this family trip worked enough.
>> Correct! 

The most memorable moment was when we took a picture together in the swimming pool of Parnas hotel.
>> Correct! 
Or: Parnas Hotel

At that time, we could see a sunset and it was awosome.
>> At that time, we could see the sunset and it was awesome.

The best food was a noodle with pork.
>> The best food was the noodle with pork.

Since we reached the restaurant too late, we almost missed the chance to eat the food.
>> Correct! Very good sentence!

Every moment in Jeju was full of our happiness.
>> Correct!

I can say that Jeju is the best place if we choose to travel Korea.
>> Correct!

See you tomorrow.
>> Correct!
¹øÈ£ Á¦¸ñ ±Û¾´ÀÌ °ø°³ »óÅ µî·ÏÀÏ Á¶È¸¼ö
140182 This is short essay about Korean greetings culture! ¼­*Àº ¿Ï·á 2024-10-02 2
140181 Homework ¿À*º½ ¿Ï·á 2024-10-01 0
140180 Which is a better way to spend your holiday, go away on vacation... ¼Õ*Èñ ¿Ï·á 2024-10-01 1310
140179 My homework ÀÌ*µµ ¿Ï·á 2024-10-01 1482
140178 My homework ÀÌ*µµ ¿Ï·á 2024-10-01 1381
140177 What are the benefits of having hobbies? À±*¿ø ¿Ï·á 2024-10-01 0
140176 Giving advice ¹Ú*°æ ¿Ï·á 2024-10-01 1545
140175 What are the best and worst things about October for you? Â÷*Áø ¿Ï·á 2024-10-01 1301
140174 Homework ±è*¿ì ¿Ï·á 2024-10-01 1
140173 homework ½É*Áø ¿Ï·á 2024-10-01 1
140172 Which athletic sport is worst for children. Why? Â÷*Çõ ¿Ï·á 2024-10-01 1365
140171 Do you always do what you want? Why or why not? ÇÑ*¿¬ ¿Ï·á 2024-10-01 1425
140170 When shopping, do you often look for cheaper alternatives? ±è*¸° ¿Ï·á 2024-10-01 1498
140169 Homework ¿À*Çö ¿Ï·á 2024-10-01 1
140168 What is the importance of meeting the deadline? ±è*¼± ¿Ï·á 2024-10-01 1404
140167 cell phone ¹Î*Á¤ ¿Ï·á 2024-10-01 1
140166 For perfect writing ÃÖ*¿¬ ¿Ï·á 2024-10-01 1452
140165 30sep2024 ±è*¶ó ¿Ï·á 2024-10-01 1410
140164 Homework ±è*´Ô ¿Ï·á 2024-10-01 1080
140163 If you had an extra hour each day, what hobby would you spend it... ÀÓ*¹Ì ¿Ï·á 2024-10-01 995

HOW TO USE IT?

[¸¶ÀÌÆäÀÌÁö > ¼ö¾÷ ³»¿ë º¸±â > ÇнÀ Ķ¸°´õ > ¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ ¹öÆ° Ŭ¸¯]

¼ö¾÷ Ƚ¼ö¸¸Å­ ¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ °Ô½ÃÆÇÀÌ »ý¼ºµÇ¸ç,
Áö³­ ³¯Â¥¿¡µµ °Ô½Ã ÇÒ ¼ö ÀÖ½À´Ï´Ù.

ÁÖ5ȸ ¼ö¾÷ : ¿ù 20ȸ ÀÌ¿ë °¡´É
ÁÖ3ȸ ¼ö¾÷ : ¿ù 12ȸ ÀÌ¿ë °¡´É
ÁÖ2ȸ ¼ö¾÷ : ¿ù 08ȸ ÀÌ¿ë °¡´É
01
±³Á¤ ³»¿ëÀº ÃÖ´ë 1,000byte±îÁö ¿Ã¸± ¼ö ÀÖ½À´Ï´Ù.

÷ºÎ ÆÄÀÏÀº ¿øÈ°ÇÑ Ã·»èÀ» À§ÇÑ Âü°íÀÚ·á·Î »ç¿ëµÉ »Ó,
ÆÄÀÏ¿¡ ´ëÇÑ Ã·»èÀº ºÒ°¡´É ÇÕ´Ï´Ù.

¾÷·Îµå °¡´ÉÇÑ Ã·ºÎ ÆÄÀÏÀº ÃÖ´ë 2mb±îÁöÀ̸ç,
÷ºÎ ÇÒ ¼ö ÀÖ´Â ÆÄÀÏ Çü½ÄÀº ´ÙÀ½°ú °°½À´Ï´Ù.

¹®¼­ - PDF, TXT, DOCX,
À̹ÌÁö - JPEG, PNG, GIF
02
Àü¹® ºÐ¾ß¸¦ Á¦¿ÜÇÑ È¸¿ø´ÔÀÌ Á÷Á¢ ÀÛ¼ºÇÑ ±Û¸¸
÷»èÀÌ °¡´ÉÇϸç,

¿Ã·ÁÁֽŠ±ÛÀÇ °­»ç´Ô ÷»èÀº 24½Ã°£ À̳»¿¡
¿Ï·á µÇ´Â °ÍÀ» ¿øÄ¢À¸·Î ÇÏ°í ÀÖ½À´Ï´Ù.
03
ÇÏ·ç °Ô½Ã °¡´ÉÇÑ ±ÛÀº 3ȸ±îÁö À̸ç,
Á¾·áµÈ ¼ö¾÷ÀÇ ¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ °Ô½ÃÆÇÀº
ÀÌ¿ëÀÌ ¾î·Á¿î Á¡ ¾çÇØ ºÎŹ µå¸³´Ï´Ù.
04