¹«·á ·¹º§Å×½ºÆ® ¹Þ°í °­»çÆò°¡ ³²±â¸é 1,OOO¿ø ÄíÆù Áï½Ã Àû¸³!

Ȥ½Ã »çÀÌÆ®¿¡¼± ãÁö ¸øÇÑ ±Ã±ÝÇÑ Á¡ÀÌ ÀÖÀ¸¼¼¿ä?
³²°ÜÁֽŠÀ̸ÞÀÏÀ» ÅëÇØ ´äº¯ µå¸®°Ú½À´Ï´Ù.

¹®ÀÇÇϽŠ³»¿ëÀÌ ¹®ÀÚ·Î ¹ß¼ÛµÇ¿À´Ï
¿¬¶ôó¸¦ ³²°ÜÁÖ¼¼¿ä.
¾÷¹«½Ã°£ ¿ù~±Ý ¿ÀÀü9½Ã~¿ÀÈÄ6½Ã
(Á¡½É½Ã°£ ³·12½Ã~¿ÀÈÄ1½Ã)

¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ °Ô½ÃÆÇ

¿µ¾î ¸»Çϱâ¿Í ¾²±â¸¦ µ¿½Ã¿¡ Àâ´Â´Ù!

ÀڽŠÀÖ°Ô ¾µ ¼ö ÀÖ´Â ¿µÀÛ¹®À» À§ÇØ ÆÄ¿öÀ×±Û¸®½¬ ¼ö¾÷À» ¼ö°­ÇϽôÂ
ȸ¿ø´Ôµé²² ¹«·á·Î Á¦°øÇص帮´Â ºÎ°¡ ¼­ºñ½º·Î, Àü¹® ºÐ¾ß¸¦ Á¦¿ÜÇÑ ÀÚÀ¯ ÁÖÁ¦
¶Ç´Â °­»ç´ÔÀÌ ³»Áֽô °úÁ¦¸¦ ȸ¿ø´Ô²²¼­ ¿µ¾î·Î ÀÛ¼ºÇØÁֽøé,
´ã´ç °­»ç ´Ô²²¼­ ¡®¹®¹ý ¿À·ù ±³Á¤¡¯ °ú ¡®´õ ³ªÀº ¿µ¾î½Ä Ç¥Çö¡¯À¸·Î ±³Á¤ÇØÁÖ´Â
¼­ºñ½º ÀÔ´Ï´Ù.

Homework

ÀÛ¼ºÀÚ: ±è*
2023-11-03 980

ȸ¿ø´ÔÀÇ ¿µÀÛ¹®

Here's for your homework:
[ESSAY]
In 3~5 sentences, answer the question below:
>> Would you fight for another country other than your own?

I've never imagined what if I fight for another country. If there are not only one case that is participate the war, I could fight for them, such as praying for them and claiming stop the war, donating for their country between Russia and Ukraine. It's the other way of fighting with them. If I got the change to participate the war for their country, I wouldn't participate.

°­»ç´ÔÀÇ Ã·»è±³Á¤ ³»¿ë

Here's another corrected composition, Geon!
Many thanks once again for sending it. Happy weekend there! 

Cheers,
Jean~~




                  Would you fight for another country other than your own?



I've never imagined what if I fight for another country.
>> I've never imagined fighting for another country. 

If there are not only one case that is participate the war, I could fight for them, such as praying for them and claiming stop the war, donating for their country between Russia and Ukraine. 
>> If there were other ways of providing aid aside from joining the war myself, then I would do it. I could pray for them, vocalize my support for them on social media, or provide monetary or material donations to their country. 

It's the other way of fighting with them. 
>> This is another method of fighting for and together with them. 

If I got the change to participate the war for their country, I wouldn't participate.
>> If I had the chance to participate in the war of other countries, I wouldn't fight for anyone other than my own nation. 

¹øÈ£ Á¦¸ñ ±Û¾´ÀÌ °ø°³ »óÅ µî·ÏÀÏ Á¶È¸¼ö
131176 Homework JA*UNG CHUNG ¿Ï·á 2023-09-20 558
131175 The most dangerous country ¾ç*¿¬ ¿Ï·á 2023-09-20 603
131174 Homework ½Å*È­ ¿Ï·á 2023-09-20 441
131173 What qualities do you look for in a good movie? ÀÌ*ÅÂ ¿Ï·á 2023-09-20 627
131172 Can you name a movie or TV show that was filmed in your city or... Á¶*Áö ¿Ï·á 2023-09-20 0
131171 Are you a hard worker? What motivates you to work? ±è*¾Æ ¿Ï·á 2023-09-20 1
131170 Being risk taker ¼º*°æ ¿Ï·á 2023-09-20 475
131169 Homework ±è*´Ô ¿Ï·á 2023-09-20 377
131168 Homework ±è*¼­ ¿Ï·á 2023-09-19 2
131167 I don\'t like live the tallest building. ¿À*Çõ ¿Ï·á 2023-09-19 0
131166 What¡¯s the nicest thing you¡¯ve ever done for your friends? À¯* ¿Ï·á 2023-09-19 0
131165 homework 09.19 ÃÖ*Ç ¿Ï·á 2023-09-19 397
131164 Homework ±è* ¿Ï·á 2023-09-19 1
131163 Homework ±è* ¿Ï·á 2023-09-19 0
131162 would you rather do homework do chores?ᩚ ¼Û*¿ì ¿Ï·á 2023-09-19 356
131161 Young people spend a lot of their \"formative years\" with... ±è*¹Î ¿Ï·á 2023-09-19 2
131160 Which school subject is your least favorite and why? ¹Ú*Çö ¿Ï·á 2023-09-19 670
131159 Being an easy and relaxed person °­*À² ¿Ï·á 2023-09-19 3
131158 Homework ½Å*È­ ¿Ï·á 2023-09-19 490
131157 Homework ±è*¼÷ ¿Ï·á 2023-09-19 599

HOW TO USE IT?

[¸¶ÀÌÆäÀÌÁö > ¼ö¾÷ ³»¿ë º¸±â > ÇнÀ Ķ¸°´õ > ¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ ¹öÆ° Ŭ¸¯]

¼ö¾÷ Ƚ¼ö¸¸Å­ ¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ °Ô½ÃÆÇÀÌ »ý¼ºµÇ¸ç,
Áö³­ ³¯Â¥¿¡µµ °Ô½Ã ÇÒ ¼ö ÀÖ½À´Ï´Ù.

ÁÖ5ȸ ¼ö¾÷ : ¿ù 20ȸ ÀÌ¿ë °¡´É
ÁÖ3ȸ ¼ö¾÷ : ¿ù 12ȸ ÀÌ¿ë °¡´É
ÁÖ2ȸ ¼ö¾÷ : ¿ù 08ȸ ÀÌ¿ë °¡´É
01
±³Á¤ ³»¿ëÀº ÃÖ´ë 1,000byte±îÁö ¿Ã¸± ¼ö ÀÖ½À´Ï´Ù.

÷ºÎ ÆÄÀÏÀº ¿øÈ°ÇÑ Ã·»èÀ» À§ÇÑ Âü°íÀÚ·á·Î »ç¿ëµÉ »Ó,
ÆÄÀÏ¿¡ ´ëÇÑ Ã·»èÀº ºÒ°¡´É ÇÕ´Ï´Ù.

¾÷·Îµå °¡´ÉÇÑ Ã·ºÎ ÆÄÀÏÀº ÃÖ´ë 2mb±îÁöÀ̸ç,
÷ºÎ ÇÒ ¼ö ÀÖ´Â ÆÄÀÏ Çü½ÄÀº ´ÙÀ½°ú °°½À´Ï´Ù.

¹®¼­ - PDF, TXT, DOCX,
À̹ÌÁö - JPEG, PNG, GIF
02
Àü¹® ºÐ¾ß¸¦ Á¦¿ÜÇÑ È¸¿ø´ÔÀÌ Á÷Á¢ ÀÛ¼ºÇÑ ±Û¸¸
÷»èÀÌ °¡´ÉÇϸç,

¿Ã·ÁÁֽŠ±ÛÀÇ °­»ç´Ô ÷»èÀº 24½Ã°£ À̳»¿¡
¿Ï·á µÇ´Â °ÍÀ» ¿øÄ¢À¸·Î ÇÏ°í ÀÖ½À´Ï´Ù.
03
ÇÏ·ç °Ô½Ã °¡´ÉÇÑ ±ÛÀº 3ȸ±îÁö À̸ç,
Á¾·áµÈ ¼ö¾÷ÀÇ ¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ °Ô½ÃÆÇÀº
ÀÌ¿ëÀÌ ¾î·Á¿î Á¡ ¾çÇØ ºÎŹ µå¸³´Ï´Ù.
04