¹«·á ·¹º§Å×½ºÆ® ¹Þ°í °­»çÆò°¡ ³²±â¸é 1,OOO¿ø ÄíÆù Áï½Ã Àû¸³!

Ȥ½Ã »çÀÌÆ®¿¡¼± ãÁö ¸øÇÑ ±Ã±ÝÇÑ Á¡ÀÌ ÀÖÀ¸¼¼¿ä?
³²°ÜÁֽŠÀ̸ÞÀÏÀ» ÅëÇØ ´äº¯ µå¸®°Ú½À´Ï´Ù.

¹®ÀÇÇϽŠ³»¿ëÀÌ ¹®ÀÚ·Î ¹ß¼ÛµÇ¿À´Ï
¿¬¶ôó¸¦ ³²°ÜÁÖ¼¼¿ä.
¾÷¹«½Ã°£ ¿ù~±Ý ¿ÀÀü9½Ã~¿ÀÈÄ6½Ã
(Á¡½É½Ã°£ ³·12½Ã~¿ÀÈÄ1½Ã)

¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ °Ô½ÃÆÇ

¿µ¾î ¸»Çϱâ¿Í ¾²±â¸¦ µ¿½Ã¿¡ Àâ´Â´Ù!

ÀڽŠÀÖ°Ô ¾µ ¼ö ÀÖ´Â ¿µÀÛ¹®À» À§ÇØ ÆÄ¿öÀ×±Û¸®½¬ ¼ö¾÷À» ¼ö°­ÇϽôÂ
ȸ¿ø´Ôµé²² ¹«·á·Î Á¦°øÇص帮´Â ºÎ°¡ ¼­ºñ½º·Î, Àü¹® ºÐ¾ß¸¦ Á¦¿ÜÇÑ ÀÚÀ¯ ÁÖÁ¦
¶Ç´Â °­»ç´ÔÀÌ ³»Áֽô °úÁ¦¸¦ ȸ¿ø´Ô²²¼­ ¿µ¾î·Î ÀÛ¼ºÇØÁֽøé,
´ã´ç °­»ç ´Ô²²¼­ ¡®¹®¹ý ¿À·ù ±³Á¤¡¯ °ú ¡®´õ ³ªÀº ¿µ¾î½Ä Ç¥Çö¡¯À¸·Î ±³Á¤ÇØÁÖ´Â
¼­ºñ½º ÀÔ´Ï´Ù.

homework

ÀÛ¼ºÀÚ: ÃÖ*Ç
2023-10-30 1550

ȸ¿ø´ÔÀÇ ¿µÀÛ¹®

~ Writing Task:
Please answer the question:
What are the advantages of being a workaholic?

I think the positive side of workaholic are the efficiency and quality of work.
The reason I think so is that not workaholic people want to finish the quickly work.
But, workaholic people think they are more good quality because they have interested in work.
So some workaholic people respected to in their companies.
But in my opinion, I think it's not a good think to fall into the work too much.
It's important to work for we are company.
But, I think we don't have to neglect health and relationship with around people because work.

°­»ç´ÔÀÇ Ã·»è±³Á¤ ³»¿ë

Good day, Keon!
Thank you so much for taking time in answering the question. Your ideas and opinions are on point. Keep it up! :)
~ T. Camille


~ Writing Task:
Please answer the question:
What are the advantages of being a workaholic?


I think the positive side of workaholic are the efficiency and quality of work.
>> I think the positive sides of being a workaholic are the efficiency and quality of work.
The reason I think so is that not workaholic people want to finish the quickly work.
>> The reason I think is that non-workaholic people want to finish the work quickly.
But, workaholic people think they are more good quality because they have interested in work.
>> But, workaholic people think they are better because they are interested in working.
So some workaholic people respected to in their companies.
>> So some workaholic people are well-respected in their companies.
But in my opinion, I think it's not a good think to fall into the work too much.
>> But in my opinion, I think it's not a good idea to fall into the work too much.
It's important to work for we are company.
>> It's important to work for the company.
But, I think we don't have to neglect health and relationship with around people because work.
>> But, I think we don't have to neglect health and relationship with the people around us because work.
¹øÈ£ Á¦¸ñ ±Û¾´ÀÌ °ø°³ »óÅ µî·ÏÀÏ Á¶È¸¼ö
134906 The new resolution ±è*¿¬ ¿Ï·á 2024-02-22 2
134905 What fusion-food would you like to try? ½Å*¼· ¿Ï·á 2024-02-22 1124
134904 Deadline ¿°*¿¹ ¿Ï·á 2024-02-22 2
134903 homework ÀÌ*¼ö ¿Ï·á 2024-02-22 1
134902 In Korea, are people in their 20\'s health conscious? ¿À*Çö ¿Ï·á 2024-02-22 1721
134901 Should your government spend more or less money on scientific... ¹Ú*È£ ¿Ï·á 2024-02-22 1350
134900 What is your best people/ interpersonal skill? õ*Àº ¿Ï·á 2024-02-22 1279
134899 Nowadays, food has become easier to prepare. Has this change... ÀÓ*È£ ¿Ï·á 2024-02-22 1
134898 What are the things that you would/would never do for a friend? ¹Ú*¿ì ¿Ï·á 2024-02-22 983
134897 What do you dislike the most about airports? È£*À± ¿Ï·á 2024-02-22 1048
134896 Do you think holidays are too commercialized? Ȳ*Àº ¿Ï·á 2024-02-22 1831
134895 Homework ±è*´Ô ¿Ï·á 2024-02-22 1588
134894 What are some of the benefits of travelling? ¿À*¼Ò ¿Ï·á 2024-02-22 4
134893 homework À¯*¸° ¿Ï·á 2024-02-21 935
134892 Why is it necessary to cope well with stress? ÃÖ*Á¤ ¿Ï·á 2024-02-21 971
134891 How do movies or television influence people\'s behavior? ÀÌ*À± ¿Ï·á 2024-02-21 1315
134890 Homework ±è*¿ì ¿Ï·á 2024-02-21 7
134889 Homework Àå*Çõ ¿Ï·á 2024-02-21 1482
134888 Homework Àå*Çõ ¿Ï·á 2024-02-21 1505
134887 Homework ±Ç*¹Ì ¿Ï·á 2024-02-21 0

HOW TO USE IT?

[¸¶ÀÌÆäÀÌÁö > ¼ö¾÷ ³»¿ë º¸±â > ÇнÀ Ķ¸°´õ > ¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ ¹öÆ° Ŭ¸¯]

¼ö¾÷ Ƚ¼ö¸¸Å­ ¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ °Ô½ÃÆÇÀÌ »ý¼ºµÇ¸ç,
Áö³­ ³¯Â¥¿¡µµ °Ô½Ã ÇÒ ¼ö ÀÖ½À´Ï´Ù.

ÁÖ5ȸ ¼ö¾÷ : ¿ù 20ȸ ÀÌ¿ë °¡´É
ÁÖ3ȸ ¼ö¾÷ : ¿ù 12ȸ ÀÌ¿ë °¡´É
ÁÖ2ȸ ¼ö¾÷ : ¿ù 08ȸ ÀÌ¿ë °¡´É
01
±³Á¤ ³»¿ëÀº ÃÖ´ë 1,000byte±îÁö ¿Ã¸± ¼ö ÀÖ½À´Ï´Ù.

÷ºÎ ÆÄÀÏÀº ¿øÈ°ÇÑ Ã·»èÀ» À§ÇÑ Âü°íÀÚ·á·Î »ç¿ëµÉ »Ó,
ÆÄÀÏ¿¡ ´ëÇÑ Ã·»èÀº ºÒ°¡´É ÇÕ´Ï´Ù.

¾÷·Îµå °¡´ÉÇÑ Ã·ºÎ ÆÄÀÏÀº ÃÖ´ë 2mb±îÁöÀ̸ç,
÷ºÎ ÇÒ ¼ö ÀÖ´Â ÆÄÀÏ Çü½ÄÀº ´ÙÀ½°ú °°½À´Ï´Ù.

¹®¼­ - PDF, TXT, DOCX,
À̹ÌÁö - JPEG, PNG, GIF
02
Àü¹® ºÐ¾ß¸¦ Á¦¿ÜÇÑ È¸¿ø´ÔÀÌ Á÷Á¢ ÀÛ¼ºÇÑ ±Û¸¸
÷»èÀÌ °¡´ÉÇϸç,

¿Ã·ÁÁֽŠ±ÛÀÇ °­»ç´Ô ÷»èÀº 24½Ã°£ À̳»¿¡
¿Ï·á µÇ´Â °ÍÀ» ¿øÄ¢À¸·Î ÇÏ°í ÀÖ½À´Ï´Ù.
03
ÇÏ·ç °Ô½Ã °¡´ÉÇÑ ±ÛÀº 3ȸ±îÁö À̸ç,
Á¾·áµÈ ¼ö¾÷ÀÇ ¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ °Ô½ÃÆÇÀº
ÀÌ¿ëÀÌ ¾î·Á¿î Á¡ ¾çÇØ ºÎŹ µå¸³´Ï´Ù.
04