¹«·á ·¹º§Å×½ºÆ® ¹Þ°í °­»çÆò°¡ ³²±â¸é 1,OOO¿ø ÄíÆù Áï½Ã Àû¸³!

Ȥ½Ã »çÀÌÆ®¿¡¼± ãÁö ¸øÇÑ ±Ã±ÝÇÑ Á¡ÀÌ ÀÖÀ¸¼¼¿ä?
³²°ÜÁֽŠÀ̸ÞÀÏÀ» ÅëÇØ ´äº¯ µå¸®°Ú½À´Ï´Ù.

¹®ÀÇÇϽŠ³»¿ëÀÌ ¹®ÀÚ·Î ¹ß¼ÛµÇ¿À´Ï
¿¬¶ôó¸¦ ³²°ÜÁÖ¼¼¿ä.
¾÷¹«½Ã°£ ¿ù~±Ý ¿ÀÀü9½Ã~¿ÀÈÄ6½Ã
(Á¡½É½Ã°£ ³·12½Ã~¿ÀÈÄ1½Ã)

¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ °Ô½ÃÆÇ

¿µ¾î ¸»Çϱâ¿Í ¾²±â¸¦ µ¿½Ã¿¡ Àâ´Â´Ù!

ÀڽŠÀÖ°Ô ¾µ ¼ö ÀÖ´Â ¿µÀÛ¹®À» À§ÇØ ÆÄ¿öÀ×±Û¸®½¬ ¼ö¾÷À» ¼ö°­ÇϽôÂ
ȸ¿ø´Ôµé²² ¹«·á·Î Á¦°øÇص帮´Â ºÎ°¡ ¼­ºñ½º·Î, Àü¹® ºÐ¾ß¸¦ Á¦¿ÜÇÑ ÀÚÀ¯ ÁÖÁ¦
¶Ç´Â °­»ç´ÔÀÌ ³»Áֽô °úÁ¦¸¦ ȸ¿ø´Ô²²¼­ ¿µ¾î·Î ÀÛ¼ºÇØÁֽøé,
´ã´ç °­»ç ´Ô²²¼­ ¡®¹®¹ý ¿À·ù ±³Á¤¡¯ °ú ¡®´õ ³ªÀº ¿µ¾î½Ä Ç¥Çö¡¯À¸·Î ±³Á¤ÇØÁÖ´Â
¼­ºñ½º ÀÔ´Ï´Ù.

homework

ÀÛ¼ºÀÚ: ÃÖ*Ç
2023-10-30 2036

ȸ¿ø´ÔÀÇ ¿µÀÛ¹®

~ Writing Task:
Please answer the question:
What are the advantages of being a workaholic?

I think the positive side of workaholic are the efficiency and quality of work.
The reason I think so is that not workaholic people want to finish the quickly work.
But, workaholic people think they are more good quality because they have interested in work.
So some workaholic people respected to in their companies.
But in my opinion, I think it's not a good think to fall into the work too much.
It's important to work for we are company.
But, I think we don't have to neglect health and relationship with around people because work.

°­»ç´ÔÀÇ Ã·»è±³Á¤ ³»¿ë

Good day, Keon!
Thank you so much for taking time in answering the question. Your ideas and opinions are on point. Keep it up! :)
~ T. Camille


~ Writing Task:
Please answer the question:
What are the advantages of being a workaholic?


I think the positive side of workaholic are the efficiency and quality of work.
>> I think the positive sides of being a workaholic are the efficiency and quality of work.
The reason I think so is that not workaholic people want to finish the quickly work.
>> The reason I think is that non-workaholic people want to finish the work quickly.
But, workaholic people think they are more good quality because they have interested in work.
>> But, workaholic people think they are better because they are interested in working.
So some workaholic people respected to in their companies.
>> So some workaholic people are well-respected in their companies.
But in my opinion, I think it's not a good think to fall into the work too much.
>> But in my opinion, I think it's not a good idea to fall into the work too much.
It's important to work for we are company.
>> It's important to work for the company.
But, I think we don't have to neglect health and relationship with around people because work.
>> But, I think we don't have to neglect health and relationship with the people around us because work.
¹øÈ£ Á¦¸ñ ±Û¾´ÀÌ °ø°³ »óÅ µî·ÏÀÏ Á¶È¸¼ö
140764 Do you ever think that some music is just noise? ¹è*ºó ¿Ï·á 2024-11-03 1088
140763 What¡¯s the most memorable vacation you¡¯ve had? ¹è*ºó ¿Ï·á 2024-11-03 845
140762 The most imformation things in my life. Á¤*¿µ ¿Ï·á 2024-11-02 9
140761 Homework ±è*Çö ¿Ï·á 2024-11-02 999
140760 Homework À±*Èñ ¿Ï·á 2024-11-02 1156
140759 How can you be more mindful of your phone usage? ÀÌ*Èñ ¿Ï·á 2024-11-01 1101
140758 Home work ½Å*¶ó ¿Ï·á 2024-11-01 1126
140757 How much time do you spend outdoors every week? ½Å*±Ô ¿Ï·á 2024-11-01 1079
140756 Do you believe that external validation is necessary for... ÀÌ*À± ¿Ï·á 2024-11-01 1128
140755 Homework ·ù*¿ì ¿Ï·á 2024-11-01 1174
140754 Describe what your ideal weekend looks like. ±è*¸° ¿Ï·á 2024-11-01 1111
140753 day 2, Homework 2024 year October 30 day ±è*¿ë ¿Ï·á 2024-11-01 1221
140752 day 1, Homework 2024 year October 29day ±è*¿ë ¿Ï·á 2024-11-01 1779
140751 What¡¯s the best place to eat in your city? ÀÌ*¹ü ¿Ï·á 2024-11-01 3
140750 Do you often forget an appointment? How will you manage... ±Ç*Áö ¿Ï·á 2024-11-01 1
140749 Do you agree that all skilled workers are professionals? Why,... ±Ç*Áö ¿Ï·á 2024-11-01 1
140748 What is a law or rule in your country that you think should be... ÀÓ*¹Ì ¿Ï·á 2024-11-01 1113
140747 How did you overcome hour sleep paralysis? ±Ç*Áö ¿Ï·á 2024-11-01 1
140746 Homework ±è*¿ì ¿Ï·á 2024-10-31 1
140745 Homework ¾ç*¿µ ¿Ï·á 2024-10-31 1103

HOW TO USE IT?

[¸¶ÀÌÆäÀÌÁö > ¼ö¾÷ ³»¿ë º¸±â > ÇнÀ Ķ¸°´õ > ¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ ¹öÆ° Ŭ¸¯]

¼ö¾÷ Ƚ¼ö¸¸Å­ ¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ °Ô½ÃÆÇÀÌ »ý¼ºµÇ¸ç,
Áö³­ ³¯Â¥¿¡µµ °Ô½Ã ÇÒ ¼ö ÀÖ½À´Ï´Ù.

ÁÖ5ȸ ¼ö¾÷ : ¿ù 20ȸ ÀÌ¿ë °¡´É
ÁÖ3ȸ ¼ö¾÷ : ¿ù 12ȸ ÀÌ¿ë °¡´É
ÁÖ2ȸ ¼ö¾÷ : ¿ù 08ȸ ÀÌ¿ë °¡´É
01
±³Á¤ ³»¿ëÀº ÃÖ´ë 1,000byte±îÁö ¿Ã¸± ¼ö ÀÖ½À´Ï´Ù.

÷ºÎ ÆÄÀÏÀº ¿øÈ°ÇÑ Ã·»èÀ» À§ÇÑ Âü°íÀÚ·á·Î »ç¿ëµÉ »Ó,
ÆÄÀÏ¿¡ ´ëÇÑ Ã·»èÀº ºÒ°¡´É ÇÕ´Ï´Ù.

¾÷·Îµå °¡´ÉÇÑ Ã·ºÎ ÆÄÀÏÀº ÃÖ´ë 2mb±îÁöÀ̸ç,
÷ºÎ ÇÒ ¼ö ÀÖ´Â ÆÄÀÏ Çü½ÄÀº ´ÙÀ½°ú °°½À´Ï´Ù.

¹®¼­ - PDF, TXT, DOCX,
À̹ÌÁö - JPEG, PNG, GIF
02
Àü¹® ºÐ¾ß¸¦ Á¦¿ÜÇÑ È¸¿ø´ÔÀÌ Á÷Á¢ ÀÛ¼ºÇÑ ±Û¸¸
÷»èÀÌ °¡´ÉÇϸç,

¿Ã·ÁÁֽŠ±ÛÀÇ °­»ç´Ô ÷»èÀº 24½Ã°£ À̳»¿¡
¿Ï·á µÇ´Â °ÍÀ» ¿øÄ¢À¸·Î ÇÏ°í ÀÖ½À´Ï´Ù.
03
ÇÏ·ç °Ô½Ã °¡´ÉÇÑ ±ÛÀº 3ȸ±îÁö À̸ç,
Á¾·áµÈ ¼ö¾÷ÀÇ ¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ °Ô½ÃÆÇÀº
ÀÌ¿ëÀÌ ¾î·Á¿î Á¡ ¾çÇØ ºÎŹ µå¸³´Ï´Ù.
04