¹«·á ·¹º§Å×½ºÆ® ¹Þ°í °­»çÆò°¡ ³²±â¸é 1,OOO¿ø ÄíÆù Áï½Ã Àû¸³!

Ȥ½Ã »çÀÌÆ®¿¡¼± ãÁö ¸øÇÑ ±Ã±ÝÇÑ Á¡ÀÌ ÀÖÀ¸¼¼¿ä?
³²°ÜÁֽŠÀ̸ÞÀÏÀ» ÅëÇØ ´äº¯ µå¸®°Ú½À´Ï´Ù.

¹®ÀÇÇϽŠ³»¿ëÀÌ ¹®ÀÚ·Î ¹ß¼ÛµÇ¿À´Ï
¿¬¶ôó¸¦ ³²°ÜÁÖ¼¼¿ä.
¾÷¹«½Ã°£ ¿ù~±Ý ¿ÀÀü9½Ã~¿ÀÈÄ6½Ã
(Á¡½É½Ã°£ ³·12½Ã~¿ÀÈÄ1½Ã)

¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ °Ô½ÃÆÇ

¿µ¾î ¸»Çϱâ¿Í ¾²±â¸¦ µ¿½Ã¿¡ Àâ´Â´Ù!

ÀڽŠÀÖ°Ô ¾µ ¼ö ÀÖ´Â ¿µÀÛ¹®À» À§ÇØ ÆÄ¿öÀ×±Û¸®½¬ ¼ö¾÷À» ¼ö°­ÇϽôÂ
ȸ¿ø´Ôµé²² ¹«·á·Î Á¦°øÇص帮´Â ºÎ°¡ ¼­ºñ½º·Î, Àü¹® ºÐ¾ß¸¦ Á¦¿ÜÇÑ ÀÚÀ¯ ÁÖÁ¦
¶Ç´Â °­»ç´ÔÀÌ ³»Áֽô °úÁ¦¸¦ ȸ¿ø´Ô²²¼­ ¿µ¾î·Î ÀÛ¼ºÇØÁֽøé,
´ã´ç °­»ç ´Ô²²¼­ ¡®¹®¹ý ¿À·ù ±³Á¤¡¯ °ú ¡®´õ ³ªÀº ¿µ¾î½Ä Ç¥Çö¡¯À¸·Î ±³Á¤ÇØÁÖ´Â
¼­ºñ½º ÀÔ´Ï´Ù.

What do you think the punishment for drunk driving should be?

ÀÛ¼ºÀÚ: ½Å*¼·
2023-10-26 1370

ȸ¿ø´ÔÀÇ ¿µÀÛ¹®

Of course, it should be stronger as time goes. Also, from where I sit, the government shouldn't give them a chance to drive again. Especially in South Korea, they're so generous with drunk driving. Fortunately, the punishment has been tightening. In addition to that, it should be more before an issue causes.

°­»ç´ÔÀÇ Ã·»è±³Á¤ ³»¿ë

Good day, Eric!
Thank you so much for taking time in answering the question. Your ideas and opinions are on point. Keep it up! :)
~ T. Camille


Of course, it should be stronger as time goes. 
>> CORRECT!
Also, from where I sit, the government shouldn't give them a chance to drive again.
>> CORRECT!
Especially in South Korea, they're so generous with drunk driving. 
>> CORRECT!
OR >> Especially in South Korea, they're so lenient with drunk driving. 
Fortunately, the punishment has been tightening. 
>> CORRECT!
In addition to that, it should be more before an issue causes.
>> In addition to that, it should be more strict before an issue causes.


¹øÈ£ Á¦¸ñ ±Û¾´ÀÌ °ø°³ »óÅ µî·ÏÀÏ Á¶È¸¼ö
131852 Where do you see yourself in 5 years? ÀÌ*À± ¿Ï·á 2023-10-23 1547
131851 HOMEWORK: Please write a short paragraph about ¡°What are the... ¾Ù* ¿Ï·á 2023-10-23 2
131850 Homework ±è* ¿Ï·á 2023-10-23 2
131849 What are the toughest jobs in the world? ½Å*¼· ¿Ï·á 2023-10-23 1463
131848 > Do you agree that hand written letters are considered more... ÀÌ*Èñ ¿Ï·á 2023-10-23 2318
131847 What are some alternative ways to enjoy Halloween or other big... ÀÌ*ÁÖ ¿Ï·á 2023-10-23 1
131846 Homework ±Ç*¹Ì ¿Ï·á 2023-10-23 0
131845 Homework ±Ç*¹Ì ¿Ï·á 2023-10-23 0
131844 Homework ·ù*¿ì ¿Ï·á 2023-10-23 1542
131843 WRITING TASK: Why is \'planning\' important? ÀÓ*Áö ¿Ï·á 2023-10-23 4
131842 A role model ÀÌ*±Ô ¿Ï·á 2023-10-23 2315
131841 Myeongseongsan ¾ç*¿¬ ¿Ï·á 2023-10-23 1431
131840 diary ±è*¿¬ ¿Ï·á 2023-10-23 1
131839 If you could live anywhere else, where would that be? ±Ç*Áö ¿Ï·á 2023-10-23 1010
131838 Homework - \'earliest memory\' ÀÌ*ÁÖ ¿Ï·á 2023-10-23 1438
131837 What do you want to include in your ideal fitness program? ½Å*Á¤ ¿Ï·á 2023-10-23 1435
131836 Homework Á¤*ȯ ¿Ï·á 2023-10-23 724
131835 service ±Ç*Èñ ¿Ï·á 2023-10-23 1138
131834 HOMEWORK ±è*Áö ¿Ï·á 2023-10-23 1249
131833 20.Oct.2023 ±è*Á¤ ¿Ï·á 2023-10-23 2

HOW TO USE IT?

[¸¶ÀÌÆäÀÌÁö > ¼ö¾÷ ³»¿ë º¸±â > ÇнÀ Ķ¸°´õ > ¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ ¹öÆ° Ŭ¸¯]

¼ö¾÷ Ƚ¼ö¸¸Å­ ¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ °Ô½ÃÆÇÀÌ »ý¼ºµÇ¸ç,
Áö³­ ³¯Â¥¿¡µµ °Ô½Ã ÇÒ ¼ö ÀÖ½À´Ï´Ù.

ÁÖ5ȸ ¼ö¾÷ : ¿ù 20ȸ ÀÌ¿ë °¡´É
ÁÖ3ȸ ¼ö¾÷ : ¿ù 12ȸ ÀÌ¿ë °¡´É
ÁÖ2ȸ ¼ö¾÷ : ¿ù 08ȸ ÀÌ¿ë °¡´É
01
±³Á¤ ³»¿ëÀº ÃÖ´ë 1,000byte±îÁö ¿Ã¸± ¼ö ÀÖ½À´Ï´Ù.

÷ºÎ ÆÄÀÏÀº ¿øÈ°ÇÑ Ã·»èÀ» À§ÇÑ Âü°íÀÚ·á·Î »ç¿ëµÉ »Ó,
ÆÄÀÏ¿¡ ´ëÇÑ Ã·»èÀº ºÒ°¡´É ÇÕ´Ï´Ù.

¾÷·Îµå °¡´ÉÇÑ Ã·ºÎ ÆÄÀÏÀº ÃÖ´ë 2mb±îÁöÀ̸ç,
÷ºÎ ÇÒ ¼ö ÀÖ´Â ÆÄÀÏ Çü½ÄÀº ´ÙÀ½°ú °°½À´Ï´Ù.

¹®¼­ - PDF, TXT, DOCX,
À̹ÌÁö - JPEG, PNG, GIF
02
Àü¹® ºÐ¾ß¸¦ Á¦¿ÜÇÑ È¸¿ø´ÔÀÌ Á÷Á¢ ÀÛ¼ºÇÑ ±Û¸¸
÷»èÀÌ °¡´ÉÇϸç,

¿Ã·ÁÁֽŠ±ÛÀÇ °­»ç´Ô ÷»èÀº 24½Ã°£ À̳»¿¡
¿Ï·á µÇ´Â °ÍÀ» ¿øÄ¢À¸·Î ÇÏ°í ÀÖ½À´Ï´Ù.
03
ÇÏ·ç °Ô½Ã °¡´ÉÇÑ ±ÛÀº 3ȸ±îÁö À̸ç,
Á¾·áµÈ ¼ö¾÷ÀÇ ¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ °Ô½ÃÆÇÀº
ÀÌ¿ëÀÌ ¾î·Á¿î Á¡ ¾çÇØ ºÎŹ µå¸³´Ï´Ù.
04