¹«·á ·¹º§Å×½ºÆ® ¹Þ°í °­»çÆò°¡ ³²±â¸é 1,OOO¿ø ÄíÆù Áï½Ã Àû¸³!

Ȥ½Ã »çÀÌÆ®¿¡¼± ãÁö ¸øÇÑ ±Ã±ÝÇÑ Á¡ÀÌ ÀÖÀ¸¼¼¿ä?
³²°ÜÁֽŠÀ̸ÞÀÏÀ» ÅëÇØ ´äº¯ µå¸®°Ú½À´Ï´Ù.

¹®ÀÇÇϽŠ³»¿ëÀÌ ¹®ÀÚ·Î ¹ß¼ÛµÇ¿À´Ï
¿¬¶ôó¸¦ ³²°ÜÁÖ¼¼¿ä.
¾÷¹«½Ã°£ ¿ù~±Ý ¿ÀÀü9½Ã~¿ÀÈÄ6½Ã
(Á¡½É½Ã°£ ³·12½Ã~¿ÀÈÄ1½Ã)

¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ °Ô½ÃÆÇ

¿µ¾î ¸»Çϱâ¿Í ¾²±â¸¦ µ¿½Ã¿¡ Àâ´Â´Ù!

ÀڽŠÀÖ°Ô ¾µ ¼ö ÀÖ´Â ¿µÀÛ¹®À» À§ÇØ ÆÄ¿öÀ×±Û¸®½¬ ¼ö¾÷À» ¼ö°­ÇϽôÂ
ȸ¿ø´Ôµé²² ¹«·á·Î Á¦°øÇص帮´Â ºÎ°¡ ¼­ºñ½º·Î, Àü¹® ºÐ¾ß¸¦ Á¦¿ÜÇÑ ÀÚÀ¯ ÁÖÁ¦
¶Ç´Â °­»ç´ÔÀÌ ³»Áֽô °úÁ¦¸¦ ȸ¿ø´Ô²²¼­ ¿µ¾î·Î ÀÛ¼ºÇØÁֽøé,
´ã´ç °­»ç ´Ô²²¼­ ¡®¹®¹ý ¿À·ù ±³Á¤¡¯ °ú ¡®´õ ³ªÀº ¿µ¾î½Ä Ç¥Çö¡¯À¸·Î ±³Á¤ÇØÁÖ´Â
¼­ºñ½º ÀÔ´Ï´Ù.

What do you think the punishment for drunk driving should be?

ÀÛ¼ºÀÚ: ½Å*¼·
2023-10-26 700

ȸ¿ø´ÔÀÇ ¿µÀÛ¹®

Of course, it should be stronger as time goes. Also, from where I sit, the government shouldn't give them a chance to drive again. Especially in South Korea, they're so generous with drunk driving. Fortunately, the punishment has been tightening. In addition to that, it should be more before an issue causes.

°­»ç´ÔÀÇ Ã·»è±³Á¤ ³»¿ë

Good day, Eric!
Thank you so much for taking time in answering the question. Your ideas and opinions are on point. Keep it up! :)
~ T. Camille


Of course, it should be stronger as time goes. 
>> CORRECT!
Also, from where I sit, the government shouldn't give them a chance to drive again.
>> CORRECT!
Especially in South Korea, they're so generous with drunk driving. 
>> CORRECT!
OR >> Especially in South Korea, they're so lenient with drunk driving. 
Fortunately, the punishment has been tightening. 
>> CORRECT!
In addition to that, it should be more before an issue causes.
>> In addition to that, it should be more strict before an issue causes.


¹øÈ£ Á¦¸ñ ±Û¾´ÀÌ °ø°³ »óÅ µî·ÏÀÏ Á¶È¸¼ö
132064 Importance of Family. ( Express your thoughts about the topic in... ÀÓ*È£ ¿Ï·á 2023-10-31 781
132063 homework 10.31 ÃÖ*Ç ¿Ï·á 2023-10-31 459
132062 My favorite flavor of ice cream ¼Û*¿ì ¿Ï·á 2023-10-31 708
132061 Homework ±è* ¿Ï·á 2023-10-31 0
132060 Imagine you went to Itaewon for Halloween this year and... ±è*¹Î ¿Ï·á 2023-10-31 2
132059 Homework ±è* ¿Ï·á 2023-10-31 0
132058 unit 3. homework ¹Ú*³ª ¿Ï·á 2023-10-31 640
132057 Homework ±è*¼÷ ¿Ï·á 2023-10-31 916
132056 What do you think children would like to change about their... ¿¡*¹Ì ¿Ï·á 2023-10-31 1
132055 Homework - \'The reason that Professional athletes and coaches... ÀÌ*ÁÖ ¿Ï·á 2023-10-31 760
132054 WHAT DO YOU WANT TO BECOME IN THE FUTURE? ±Ç*ÁÖ ¿Ï·á 2023-10-31 485
132053 Is there a music genre that you will never listen to? ½Å*¼· ¿Ï·á 2023-10-31 636
132052 OMEWORK: Please write a short paragraph about ¡°Is having an... ¾Ù* ¿Ï·á 2023-10-31 1
132051 WRITING TASK: Why do you think people like to invite their... ÀÓ*Áö ¿Ï·á 2023-10-31 3
132050 Diary ±è*¿¬ ¿Ï·á 2023-10-31 0
132049 HOMEWORK-231031 ¾ç*¾Ö ¿Ï·á 2023-10-31 1
132048 Homework ·ù*¿ì ¿Ï·á 2023-10-31 722
132047 Which kind of music do you like? ¼Û*¿ì ¿Ï·á 2023-10-31 533
132046 homework Á¤*¾È ¿Ï·á 2023-10-31 0
132045 The most important factor ¾ç*¿¬ ¿Ï·á 2023-10-31 645

HOW TO USE IT?

[¸¶ÀÌÆäÀÌÁö > ¼ö¾÷ ³»¿ë º¸±â > ÇнÀ Ķ¸°´õ > ¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ ¹öÆ° Ŭ¸¯]

¼ö¾÷ Ƚ¼ö¸¸Å­ ¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ °Ô½ÃÆÇÀÌ »ý¼ºµÇ¸ç,
Áö³­ ³¯Â¥¿¡µµ °Ô½Ã ÇÒ ¼ö ÀÖ½À´Ï´Ù.

ÁÖ5ȸ ¼ö¾÷ : ¿ù 20ȸ ÀÌ¿ë °¡´É
ÁÖ3ȸ ¼ö¾÷ : ¿ù 12ȸ ÀÌ¿ë °¡´É
ÁÖ2ȸ ¼ö¾÷ : ¿ù 08ȸ ÀÌ¿ë °¡´É
01
±³Á¤ ³»¿ëÀº ÃÖ´ë 1,000byte±îÁö ¿Ã¸± ¼ö ÀÖ½À´Ï´Ù.

÷ºÎ ÆÄÀÏÀº ¿øÈ°ÇÑ Ã·»èÀ» À§ÇÑ Âü°íÀÚ·á·Î »ç¿ëµÉ »Ó,
ÆÄÀÏ¿¡ ´ëÇÑ Ã·»èÀº ºÒ°¡´É ÇÕ´Ï´Ù.

¾÷·Îµå °¡´ÉÇÑ Ã·ºÎ ÆÄÀÏÀº ÃÖ´ë 2mb±îÁöÀ̸ç,
÷ºÎ ÇÒ ¼ö ÀÖ´Â ÆÄÀÏ Çü½ÄÀº ´ÙÀ½°ú °°½À´Ï´Ù.

¹®¼­ - PDF, TXT, DOCX,
À̹ÌÁö - JPEG, PNG, GIF
02
Àü¹® ºÐ¾ß¸¦ Á¦¿ÜÇÑ È¸¿ø´ÔÀÌ Á÷Á¢ ÀÛ¼ºÇÑ ±Û¸¸
÷»èÀÌ °¡´ÉÇϸç,

¿Ã·ÁÁֽŠ±ÛÀÇ °­»ç´Ô ÷»èÀº 24½Ã°£ À̳»¿¡
¿Ï·á µÇ´Â °ÍÀ» ¿øÄ¢À¸·Î ÇÏ°í ÀÖ½À´Ï´Ù.
03
ÇÏ·ç °Ô½Ã °¡´ÉÇÑ ±ÛÀº 3ȸ±îÁö À̸ç,
Á¾·áµÈ ¼ö¾÷ÀÇ ¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ °Ô½ÃÆÇÀº
ÀÌ¿ëÀÌ ¾î·Á¿î Á¡ ¾çÇØ ºÎŹ µå¸³´Ï´Ù.
04