¹«·á ·¹º§Å×½ºÆ® ¹Þ°í °­»çÆò°¡ ³²±â¸é 1,OOO¿ø ÄíÆù Áï½Ã Àû¸³!

Ȥ½Ã »çÀÌÆ®¿¡¼± ãÁö ¸øÇÑ ±Ã±ÝÇÑ Á¡ÀÌ ÀÖÀ¸¼¼¿ä?
³²°ÜÁֽŠÀ̸ÞÀÏÀ» ÅëÇØ ´äº¯ µå¸®°Ú½À´Ï´Ù.

¹®ÀÇÇϽŠ³»¿ëÀÌ ¹®ÀÚ·Î ¹ß¼ÛµÇ¿À´Ï
¿¬¶ôó¸¦ ³²°ÜÁÖ¼¼¿ä.
¾÷¹«½Ã°£ ¿ù~±Ý ¿ÀÀü9½Ã~¿ÀÈÄ6½Ã
(Á¡½É½Ã°£ ³·12½Ã~¿ÀÈÄ1½Ã)

¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ °Ô½ÃÆÇ

¿µ¾î ¸»Çϱâ¿Í ¾²±â¸¦ µ¿½Ã¿¡ Àâ´Â´Ù!

ÀڽŠÀÖ°Ô ¾µ ¼ö ÀÖ´Â ¿µÀÛ¹®À» À§ÇØ ÆÄ¿öÀ×±Û¸®½¬ ¼ö¾÷À» ¼ö°­ÇϽôÂ
ȸ¿ø´Ôµé²² ¹«·á·Î Á¦°øÇص帮´Â ºÎ°¡ ¼­ºñ½º·Î, Àü¹® ºÐ¾ß¸¦ Á¦¿ÜÇÑ ÀÚÀ¯ ÁÖÁ¦
¶Ç´Â °­»ç´ÔÀÌ ³»Áֽô °úÁ¦¸¦ ȸ¿ø´Ô²²¼­ ¿µ¾î·Î ÀÛ¼ºÇØÁֽøé,
´ã´ç °­»ç ´Ô²²¼­ ¡®¹®¹ý ¿À·ù ±³Á¤¡¯ °ú ¡®´õ ³ªÀº ¿µ¾î½Ä Ç¥Çö¡¯À¸·Î ±³Á¤ÇØÁÖ´Â
¼­ºñ½º ÀÔ´Ï´Ù.

After school

ÀÛ¼ºÀÚ: ±è*¹Î
2023-10-26 1796

ȸ¿ø´ÔÀÇ ¿µÀÛ¹®

After school, I went to snack shop to eat fishcake. I ate 2red fishcake and it was really delicous. Next my friend bought me a ice cream so that was delicious to.after that we went to play in playground, we just ride a swing. Also there was nothing to do, so we practice dance name slip back, there is famous korea that dance like he is floating howeber, that become very famous and that also looked fun so me and my friends practiced it however, we don't even danced closed

°­»ç´ÔÀÇ Ã·»è±³Á¤ ³»¿ë

Hello Jude, happy day to you! I really like fishcake. I'm glad to know that you enjoy eating snacks with your friends as well as you enjoy doing various activities with them. We will talk more in class about this. I will see you then. Have a great day to you and always be careful! ~T. Lyn
After school, I went to snack shop to eat fishcake. 
>>After school, I went to a snack bar and ate fish cake.
I ate 2red fishcake and it was really delicous. 
>>I ate two red fish cakes and they were really delicious. 
Next my friend bought me a ice cream so that was delicious to.
>>Then he just went to the playground to play and ride on the swings.
after that we went to play in playground, we just ride a swing. 
>>Next, my friend bought me ice cream and it was delicious. 
Also there was nothing to do, so we practice dance name slip back, there is famous korea that dance like he is floating howeber, that become very famous and that also looked fun so me and my friends practiced it however, we don't even danced closed
>>Also, because I had nothing else to do, I practiced the name "Slipback". There is a place in Korea where you dance like you're floating, and it became very famous and seemed fun, so my friends and I practiced, but we never did it. The dance was really hard to follow and we were not close enough.
¹øÈ£ Á¦¸ñ ±Û¾´ÀÌ °ø°³ »óÅ µî·ÏÀÏ Á¶È¸¼ö
129804 How do you pursue your passions? ½Å*¼· ¿Ï·á 2023-07-27 1575
129803 WRITING TASK: How old do you think children should be before... ÀÓ*Áö ¿Ï·á 2023-07-27 2
129802 What would motivate you to continue working out? Áö* ¿Ï·á 2023-07-27 0
129801 Homework ±Ç*¹Ì ¿Ï·á 2023-07-27 0
129800 Homework ±Ç*¹Ì ¿Ï·á 2023-07-27 1
129799 Homework ±è*ȯ ¿Ï·á 2023-07-27 1456
129798 How can self-introduction help build a relationship? ¹Ú*¾Æ ¿Ï·á 2023-07-27 1135
129797 Homework ½Å*È­ ¿Ï·á 2023-07-27 1225
129796 Korea\'s Big Companies ÀÌ*ÅÂ ¿Ï·á 2023-07-27 1745
129795 Homework ½Å*È­ ¿Ï·á 2023-07-27 3215
129794 Korea\'s Apartments, overpricing or not? and why? ÀÌ*ÅÂ ¿Ï·á 2023-07-27 1687
129793 The disadvantages of wearing make-up ÀÌ*ÅÂ ¿Ï·á 2023-07-27 1310
129792 Homework ±Ç*¹Ì ¿Ï·á 2023-07-27 0
129791 Homework ±Ç*¹Ì ¿Ï·á 2023-07-27 1
129790 homework ±è*¾Æ ¿Ï·á 2023-07-27 1321
129789 What do you plan to do this summer school vacation? Write about... ¿À*Çõ ¿Ï·á 2023-07-27 1
129788 homework Àå*¼® ¿Ï·á 2023-07-27 1120
129787 Why self respect is important ±è*¿ì ¿Ï·á 2023-07-27 0
129786 Day9 ½Å*À± ¿Ï·á 2023-07-27 0
129785 Homework ÁÖ*¿¬ ¿Ï·á 2023-07-27 1168

HOW TO USE IT?

[¸¶ÀÌÆäÀÌÁö > ¼ö¾÷ ³»¿ë º¸±â > ÇнÀ Ķ¸°´õ > ¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ ¹öÆ° Ŭ¸¯]

¼ö¾÷ Ƚ¼ö¸¸Å­ ¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ °Ô½ÃÆÇÀÌ »ý¼ºµÇ¸ç,
Áö³­ ³¯Â¥¿¡µµ °Ô½Ã ÇÒ ¼ö ÀÖ½À´Ï´Ù.

ÁÖ5ȸ ¼ö¾÷ : ¿ù 20ȸ ÀÌ¿ë °¡´É
ÁÖ3ȸ ¼ö¾÷ : ¿ù 12ȸ ÀÌ¿ë °¡´É
ÁÖ2ȸ ¼ö¾÷ : ¿ù 08ȸ ÀÌ¿ë °¡´É
01
±³Á¤ ³»¿ëÀº ÃÖ´ë 1,000byte±îÁö ¿Ã¸± ¼ö ÀÖ½À´Ï´Ù.

÷ºÎ ÆÄÀÏÀº ¿øÈ°ÇÑ Ã·»èÀ» À§ÇÑ Âü°íÀÚ·á·Î »ç¿ëµÉ »Ó,
ÆÄÀÏ¿¡ ´ëÇÑ Ã·»èÀº ºÒ°¡´É ÇÕ´Ï´Ù.

¾÷·Îµå °¡´ÉÇÑ Ã·ºÎ ÆÄÀÏÀº ÃÖ´ë 2mb±îÁöÀ̸ç,
÷ºÎ ÇÒ ¼ö ÀÖ´Â ÆÄÀÏ Çü½ÄÀº ´ÙÀ½°ú °°½À´Ï´Ù.

¹®¼­ - PDF, TXT, DOCX,
À̹ÌÁö - JPEG, PNG, GIF
02
Àü¹® ºÐ¾ß¸¦ Á¦¿ÜÇÑ È¸¿ø´ÔÀÌ Á÷Á¢ ÀÛ¼ºÇÑ ±Û¸¸
÷»èÀÌ °¡´ÉÇϸç,

¿Ã·ÁÁֽŠ±ÛÀÇ °­»ç´Ô ÷»èÀº 24½Ã°£ À̳»¿¡
¿Ï·á µÇ´Â °ÍÀ» ¿øÄ¢À¸·Î ÇÏ°í ÀÖ½À´Ï´Ù.
03
ÇÏ·ç °Ô½Ã °¡´ÉÇÑ ±ÛÀº 3ȸ±îÁö À̸ç,
Á¾·áµÈ ¼ö¾÷ÀÇ ¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ °Ô½ÃÆÇÀº
ÀÌ¿ëÀÌ ¾î·Á¿î Á¡ ¾çÇØ ºÎŹ µå¸³´Ï´Ù.
04