¹«·á ·¹º§Å×½ºÆ® ¹Þ°í °­»çÆò°¡ ³²±â¸é 1,OOO¿ø ÄíÆù Áï½Ã Àû¸³!

Ȥ½Ã »çÀÌÆ®¿¡¼± ãÁö ¸øÇÑ ±Ã±ÝÇÑ Á¡ÀÌ ÀÖÀ¸¼¼¿ä?
³²°ÜÁֽŠÀ̸ÞÀÏÀ» ÅëÇØ ´äº¯ µå¸®°Ú½À´Ï´Ù.

¹®ÀÇÇϽŠ³»¿ëÀÌ ¹®ÀÚ·Î ¹ß¼ÛµÇ¿À´Ï
¿¬¶ôó¸¦ ³²°ÜÁÖ¼¼¿ä.
¾÷¹«½Ã°£ ¿ù~±Ý ¿ÀÀü9½Ã~¿ÀÈÄ6½Ã
(Á¡½É½Ã°£ ³·12½Ã~¿ÀÈÄ1½Ã)

¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ °Ô½ÃÆÇ

¿µ¾î ¸»Çϱâ¿Í ¾²±â¸¦ µ¿½Ã¿¡ Àâ´Â´Ù!

ÀڽŠÀÖ°Ô ¾µ ¼ö ÀÖ´Â ¿µÀÛ¹®À» À§ÇØ ÆÄ¿öÀ×±Û¸®½¬ ¼ö¾÷À» ¼ö°­ÇϽôÂ
ȸ¿ø´Ôµé²² ¹«·á·Î Á¦°øÇص帮´Â ºÎ°¡ ¼­ºñ½º·Î, Àü¹® ºÐ¾ß¸¦ Á¦¿ÜÇÑ ÀÚÀ¯ ÁÖÁ¦
¶Ç´Â °­»ç´ÔÀÌ ³»Áֽô °úÁ¦¸¦ ȸ¿ø´Ô²²¼­ ¿µ¾î·Î ÀÛ¼ºÇØÁֽøé,
´ã´ç °­»ç ´Ô²²¼­ ¡®¹®¹ý ¿À·ù ±³Á¤¡¯ °ú ¡®´õ ³ªÀº ¿µ¾î½Ä Ç¥Çö¡¯À¸·Î ±³Á¤ÇØÁÖ´Â
¼­ºñ½º ÀÔ´Ï´Ù.

After school

ÀÛ¼ºÀÚ: ±è*¹Î
2023-10-26 1882

ȸ¿ø´ÔÀÇ ¿µÀÛ¹®

After school, I went to snack shop to eat fishcake. I ate 2red fishcake and it was really delicous. Next my friend bought me a ice cream so that was delicious to.after that we went to play in playground, we just ride a swing. Also there was nothing to do, so we practice dance name slip back, there is famous korea that dance like he is floating howeber, that become very famous and that also looked fun so me and my friends practiced it however, we don't even danced closed

°­»ç´ÔÀÇ Ã·»è±³Á¤ ³»¿ë

Hello Jude, happy day to you! I really like fishcake. I'm glad to know that you enjoy eating snacks with your friends as well as you enjoy doing various activities with them. We will talk more in class about this. I will see you then. Have a great day to you and always be careful! ~T. Lyn
After school, I went to snack shop to eat fishcake. 
>>After school, I went to a snack bar and ate fish cake.
I ate 2red fishcake and it was really delicous. 
>>I ate two red fish cakes and they were really delicious. 
Next my friend bought me a ice cream so that was delicious to.
>>Then he just went to the playground to play and ride on the swings.
after that we went to play in playground, we just ride a swing. 
>>Next, my friend bought me ice cream and it was delicious. 
Also there was nothing to do, so we practice dance name slip back, there is famous korea that dance like he is floating howeber, that become very famous and that also looked fun so me and my friends practiced it however, we don't even danced closed
>>Also, because I had nothing else to do, I practiced the name "Slipback". There is a place in Korea where you dance like you're floating, and it became very famous and seemed fun, so my friends and I practiced, but we never did it. The dance was really hard to follow and we were not close enough.
¹øÈ£ Á¦¸ñ ±Û¾´ÀÌ °ø°³ »óÅ µî·ÏÀÏ Á¶È¸¼ö
134942 I helped someone. °­*¼ö ¿Ï·á 2024-02-23 1205
134941 What role do you think art play in society? ±Ç*Èñ ¿Ï·á 2024-02-23 636
134940 Homework ·ù*¿ì ¿Ï·á 2024-02-23 653
134939 Homework À±*¼± ¿Ï·á 2024-02-23 514
134938 Do people work long hours in your country? ½Å*¼· ¿Ï·á 2024-02-23 684
134937 How do you handle difficult colleagues? õ*Àº ¿Ï·á 2024-02-23 926
134936 WRITING TASK: Why do you think in relationships, some cheat on... ÀÓ*Áö ¿Ï·á 2024-02-23 5
134935 The impact of separation ÀÓ*Áø ¿Ï·á 2024-02-23 487
134934 What are some of the most popular books in Korea? Why do so many... ¹Ú*È£ ¿Ï·á 2024-02-23 565
134933 HOMEWORK ¹Ú*Àº ¿Ï·á 2024-02-23 1
134932 HOMEWORK ¹Ú*Àº ¿Ï·á 2024-02-23 2
134931 I can\'t hear you...TT ¹Ú*Çý ¿Ï·á 2024-02-22 2
134930 What do you want to be when you grow up? ÃÖ*¼º ¿Ï·á 2024-02-22 898
134929 How many cousins do you have? ÃÖ*¼º ¿Ï·á 2024-02-22 480
134928 Are you a friendly person? ÃÖ*¼º ¿Ï·á 2024-02-22 393
134927 Will you still be traveling without your husband? ±Ç*Áö ¿Ï·á 2024-02-22 6
134926 Homework Àå*Çõ ¿Ï·á 2024-02-22 440
134925 homework 02.22 ÃÖ*Ç ¿Ï·á 2024-02-22 714
134924 The best thing about my grandma ±è*¹Î ¿Ï·á 2024-02-22 402
134923 Why do you think people are dbsessed with their heights? Give at... ¿À*Çõ ¿Ï·á 2024-02-22 2

HOW TO USE IT?

[¸¶ÀÌÆäÀÌÁö > ¼ö¾÷ ³»¿ë º¸±â > ÇнÀ Ķ¸°´õ > ¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ ¹öÆ° Ŭ¸¯]

¼ö¾÷ Ƚ¼ö¸¸Å­ ¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ °Ô½ÃÆÇÀÌ »ý¼ºµÇ¸ç,
Áö³­ ³¯Â¥¿¡µµ °Ô½Ã ÇÒ ¼ö ÀÖ½À´Ï´Ù.

ÁÖ5ȸ ¼ö¾÷ : ¿ù 20ȸ ÀÌ¿ë °¡´É
ÁÖ3ȸ ¼ö¾÷ : ¿ù 12ȸ ÀÌ¿ë °¡´É
ÁÖ2ȸ ¼ö¾÷ : ¿ù 08ȸ ÀÌ¿ë °¡´É
01
±³Á¤ ³»¿ëÀº ÃÖ´ë 1,000byte±îÁö ¿Ã¸± ¼ö ÀÖ½À´Ï´Ù.

÷ºÎ ÆÄÀÏÀº ¿øÈ°ÇÑ Ã·»èÀ» À§ÇÑ Âü°íÀÚ·á·Î »ç¿ëµÉ »Ó,
ÆÄÀÏ¿¡ ´ëÇÑ Ã·»èÀº ºÒ°¡´É ÇÕ´Ï´Ù.

¾÷·Îµå °¡´ÉÇÑ Ã·ºÎ ÆÄÀÏÀº ÃÖ´ë 2mb±îÁöÀ̸ç,
÷ºÎ ÇÒ ¼ö ÀÖ´Â ÆÄÀÏ Çü½ÄÀº ´ÙÀ½°ú °°½À´Ï´Ù.

¹®¼­ - PDF, TXT, DOCX,
À̹ÌÁö - JPEG, PNG, GIF
02
Àü¹® ºÐ¾ß¸¦ Á¦¿ÜÇÑ È¸¿ø´ÔÀÌ Á÷Á¢ ÀÛ¼ºÇÑ ±Û¸¸
÷»èÀÌ °¡´ÉÇϸç,

¿Ã·ÁÁֽŠ±ÛÀÇ °­»ç´Ô ÷»èÀº 24½Ã°£ À̳»¿¡
¿Ï·á µÇ´Â °ÍÀ» ¿øÄ¢À¸·Î ÇÏ°í ÀÖ½À´Ï´Ù.
03
ÇÏ·ç °Ô½Ã °¡´ÉÇÑ ±ÛÀº 3ȸ±îÁö À̸ç,
Á¾·áµÈ ¼ö¾÷ÀÇ ¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ °Ô½ÃÆÇÀº
ÀÌ¿ëÀÌ ¾î·Á¿î Á¡ ¾çÇØ ºÎŹ µå¸³´Ï´Ù.
04