¹«·á ·¹º§Å×½ºÆ® ¹Þ°í °­»çÆò°¡ ³²±â¸é 1,OOO¿ø ÄíÆù Áï½Ã Àû¸³!

Ȥ½Ã »çÀÌÆ®¿¡¼± ãÁö ¸øÇÑ ±Ã±ÝÇÑ Á¡ÀÌ ÀÖÀ¸¼¼¿ä?
³²°ÜÁֽŠÀ̸ÞÀÏÀ» ÅëÇØ ´äº¯ µå¸®°Ú½À´Ï´Ù.

¹®ÀÇÇϽŠ³»¿ëÀÌ ¹®ÀÚ·Î ¹ß¼ÛµÇ¿À´Ï
¿¬¶ôó¸¦ ³²°ÜÁÖ¼¼¿ä.
¾÷¹«½Ã°£ ¿ù~±Ý ¿ÀÀü9½Ã~¿ÀÈÄ6½Ã
(Á¡½É½Ã°£ ³·12½Ã~¿ÀÈÄ1½Ã)

¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ °Ô½ÃÆÇ

¿µ¾î ¸»Çϱâ¿Í ¾²±â¸¦ µ¿½Ã¿¡ Àâ´Â´Ù!

ÀڽŠÀÖ°Ô ¾µ ¼ö ÀÖ´Â ¿µÀÛ¹®À» À§ÇØ ÆÄ¿öÀ×±Û¸®½¬ ¼ö¾÷À» ¼ö°­ÇϽôÂ
ȸ¿ø´Ôµé²² ¹«·á·Î Á¦°øÇص帮´Â ºÎ°¡ ¼­ºñ½º·Î, Àü¹® ºÐ¾ß¸¦ Á¦¿ÜÇÑ ÀÚÀ¯ ÁÖÁ¦
¶Ç´Â °­»ç´ÔÀÌ ³»Áֽô °úÁ¦¸¦ ȸ¿ø´Ô²²¼­ ¿µ¾î·Î ÀÛ¼ºÇØÁֽøé,
´ã´ç °­»ç ´Ô²²¼­ ¡®¹®¹ý ¿À·ù ±³Á¤¡¯ °ú ¡®´õ ³ªÀº ¿µ¾î½Ä Ç¥Çö¡¯À¸·Î ±³Á¤ÇØÁÖ´Â
¼­ºñ½º ÀÔ´Ï´Ù.

Homework - \'earliest memory\'

ÀÛ¼ºÀÚ: ÀÌ*ÁÖ
2023-10-23 995

ȸ¿ø´ÔÀÇ ¿µÀÛ¹®

Wow,, actually, i know the first that there is a homework every class.
so.. i saw the homework's topic. that was 'earliest memory'
honestly, i can't understand this question. so i'm gonna tell about anything.

What i can remember when i was elemental student. that time, i played a lot of games with my school friends.
i'm talking, PC game in the PC room, real soccer game and real basketball game. you name it.
so that was really fun and happy.

i remembered one more. there are two my friends in the elemental school.
i'm gonna call my friends A and B.
One day, they went to fight to the school playground.. so i went to look around them.
As soon as i got there, A floated in the air and kicked B.
B was knocked down by his kick.
everyone in there was surprised because B wan not a weak person.
since something surprising happened that time, i can remember that time.

Than you for reading my writing.

°­»ç´ÔÀÇ Ã·»è±³Á¤ ³»¿ë

I enjoyed reading your composition. You wrote something that was directly relevant to the question. I simply made some corrections to your sentences so you can polish them next time. In addition, I found the second memory funny, and instances like that happen typically in elementary and middle schools. It's a good thing you're not involved in that trouble. 

-Chammy

Wow,, actually, i know the first that there is a homework every class.

>> Wow! Actually, I knew from the start that there would be homework in every class.

so.. i saw the homework's topic. that was 'earliest memory'

>> So, I saw the homework topic that was about 'earliest memory'

honestly, i can't understand this question. so i'm gonna tell about anything.
>> Honestly, I can't understand this question. So, I'm gonna tell you about anything.

What i can remember when i was elemental student. that time, i played a lot of games with my school friends.

>> What I can remember when I was an elementary student, that time I played a lot of games with my school friends.

i'm talking, PC game in the PC room, real soccer game and real basketball game. you name it.

>> I¡¯m talking about, PC game in the PC room, a real soccer game, and a real basketball game. You name it.

so that was really fun and happy.
>>So that was really fun and happy.
i remembered one more. there are two my friends in the elemental school.

>> I remembered one more. There are two of my friends in the elementary school.

i'm gonna call my friends A and B.

>>I¡¯m gonna call my friends A and B.

One day, they went to fight to the school playground.. so i went to look around them.

>>One day, they got into a fight on the school playground. So, I went to look around them.

As soon as i got there, A floated in the air and kicked B.

>>As soon as I got there, A floated in the air and kicked B.

B was knocked down by his kick.

>>Correct
everyone in there was surprised because B wan not a weak person.

>> Everyone in there was surprised because B is not a weak person.

since something surprising happened that time, i can remember that time.
>> Since it happened, I cannot forget that time.
Than you for reading my writing.

>>Thank you for reading my writing.

OR

>> Thank you for reading my composition.

 


¹øÈ£ Á¦¸ñ ±Û¾´ÀÌ °ø°³ »óÅ µî·ÏÀÏ Á¶È¸¼ö
131527 homework 10.09 ÃÖ*Ç ¿Ï·á 2023-10-09 1366
131526 where I want to fishing ÃÖ*ȯ ¿Ï·á 2023-10-09 1217
131525 My favorite emoji ¼Û*¿ì ¿Ï·á 2023-10-09 1026
131524 Homework ÀÌ*È­ ¿Ï·á 2023-10-09 933
131523 What was the most special thing you did for a friend in the... ±è*¿µ ¿Ï·á 2023-10-09 1024
131522 Can You Tell which sentences are True and which are False? ¿¡*¹Ì ¿Ï·á 2023-10-09 1
131521 HOMEWORK: Please write a short paragraph about ¡°My favorite... ¾Ù* ¿Ï·á 2023-10-09 2
131520 Homework ±è*¿ì ¿Ï·á 2023-10-09 1210
131519 What do you put in your poket? ¹Ú*Çö ¿Ï·á 2023-10-09 1653
131518 What do you consider to be your weakness? ÀÌ*À± ¿Ï·á 2023-10-09 1492
131517 Is going on a solo trip part of your bucket list? Why or why not? ¹Ú*¿ì ¿Ï·á 2023-10-09 1092
131516 homework ¾È*¿¬ ¿Ï·á 2023-10-09 941
131515 Aside from the smell and the texture, why do some people still... ÀÌ*ÁÖ ¿Ï·á 2023-10-09 1
131514 homework ¼Õ*Èñ ¿Ï·á 2023-10-09 1
131513 The happiest Yes. ¾ç*¿¬ ¿Ï·á 2023-10-09 980
131512 electricity is a very good invention. À±*Çý ¿Ï·á 2023-10-09 815
131511 How do you usually solve a stressful situation? Share your... ±è*¹Î ¿Ï·á 2023-10-09 1
131510 My favorite character is always trying for dreams and taking... À±*Çý ¿Ï·á 2023-10-09 1272
131509 I don\'t know. À±*Çý ¿Ï·á 2023-10-09 958
131508 WRITING TASK: What kind of meeting do you always want to attend? ÀÓ*Áö ¿Ï·á 2023-10-09 4

HOW TO USE IT?

[¸¶ÀÌÆäÀÌÁö > ¼ö¾÷ ³»¿ë º¸±â > ÇнÀ Ķ¸°´õ > ¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ ¹öÆ° Ŭ¸¯]

¼ö¾÷ Ƚ¼ö¸¸Å­ ¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ °Ô½ÃÆÇÀÌ »ý¼ºµÇ¸ç,
Áö³­ ³¯Â¥¿¡µµ °Ô½Ã ÇÒ ¼ö ÀÖ½À´Ï´Ù.

ÁÖ5ȸ ¼ö¾÷ : ¿ù 20ȸ ÀÌ¿ë °¡´É
ÁÖ3ȸ ¼ö¾÷ : ¿ù 12ȸ ÀÌ¿ë °¡´É
ÁÖ2ȸ ¼ö¾÷ : ¿ù 08ȸ ÀÌ¿ë °¡´É
01
±³Á¤ ³»¿ëÀº ÃÖ´ë 1,000byte±îÁö ¿Ã¸± ¼ö ÀÖ½À´Ï´Ù.

÷ºÎ ÆÄÀÏÀº ¿øÈ°ÇÑ Ã·»èÀ» À§ÇÑ Âü°íÀÚ·á·Î »ç¿ëµÉ »Ó,
ÆÄÀÏ¿¡ ´ëÇÑ Ã·»èÀº ºÒ°¡´É ÇÕ´Ï´Ù.

¾÷·Îµå °¡´ÉÇÑ Ã·ºÎ ÆÄÀÏÀº ÃÖ´ë 2mb±îÁöÀ̸ç,
÷ºÎ ÇÒ ¼ö ÀÖ´Â ÆÄÀÏ Çü½ÄÀº ´ÙÀ½°ú °°½À´Ï´Ù.

¹®¼­ - PDF, TXT, DOCX,
À̹ÌÁö - JPEG, PNG, GIF
02
Àü¹® ºÐ¾ß¸¦ Á¦¿ÜÇÑ È¸¿ø´ÔÀÌ Á÷Á¢ ÀÛ¼ºÇÑ ±Û¸¸
÷»èÀÌ °¡´ÉÇϸç,

¿Ã·ÁÁֽŠ±ÛÀÇ °­»ç´Ô ÷»èÀº 24½Ã°£ À̳»¿¡
¿Ï·á µÇ´Â °ÍÀ» ¿øÄ¢À¸·Î ÇÏ°í ÀÖ½À´Ï´Ù.
03
ÇÏ·ç °Ô½Ã °¡´ÉÇÑ ±ÛÀº 3ȸ±îÁö À̸ç,
Á¾·áµÈ ¼ö¾÷ÀÇ ¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ °Ô½ÃÆÇÀº
ÀÌ¿ëÀÌ ¾î·Á¿î Á¡ ¾çÇØ ºÎŹ µå¸³´Ï´Ù.
04