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영작교정 게시판

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자신 있게 쓸 수 있는 영작문을 위해 파워잉글리쉬 수업을 수강하시는
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담당 강사 님께서 ‘문법 오류 교정’ 과 ‘더 나은 영어식 표현’으로 교정해주는
서비스 입니다.

What would you like to change about the education system of your country?

작성자: 정*림
2023-10-21 2643

회원님의 영작문

Korea is a country that provides cramming education. The teacher unilaterally educates the students. This kind of education makes it difficult to express one's opinion during class, and it is difficult to ask questions easily even when questions arise. Also, if you grow up with education like this, this situation creates a social atmosphere and creates an atmosphere that you don't want to stand out anywhere. Fortunately, Korea is making efforts to solve these problems. From elementary school students, discussion-oriented classes are promoted, and middle and high school students are making efforts to choose the classes they want to hear.
However, having received cramming education, I am a little confused by the sudden change in the social atmosphere.

강사님의 첨삭교정 내용

Hello Jeong Ye Lim,

Your insight into the education system in Korea is thoughtful. You've highlighted some of the challenges associated with traditional cramming education and its impact on students' ability to express themselves. It's encouraging to hear that efforts are being made to promote more discussion-oriented classes and student choice in education. Transitioning from a rigid educational system to one that fosters independent thinking can indeed be challenging. Adaptation to these changes can take some time, but it's a step in the right direction toward a more well-rounded and inclusive educational experience.

~Teacher Cathy

 

Korea is a country that provides cramming education.

>>CORRECT

OR>>In Korea, we often have intense cramming education

The teacher unilaterally educates the students.

>>CORRECT

OR>>Teachers usually teach without much interaction.

This kind of education makes it difficult to express one's opinion during class, and it is difficult to ask questions easily even when questions arise.

>>CORRECT

OR>>This way of learning makes it hard to share your thoughts in class or ask questions when you're curious.

Also, if you grow up with education like this, this situation creates a social atmosphere and creates an atmosphere that you don't want to stand out anywhere.

>>Also, if you grow up with an education like this, this situation creates a social atmosphere and creates an atmosphere in which you don't want to stand out anywhere.

Fortunately, Korea is making efforts to solve these problems.

>>CORRECT

OR>>Luckily, Korea is taking steps to address these issues.

From elementary school students, discussion-oriented classes are promoted, and middle and high school students are making efforts to choose the classes they want to hear.

>>Starting from elementary school, they are encouraging classes where students can discuss, and in middle and high schools, students are given the chance to pick the classes they're interested in.

However, having received cramming education, I am a little confused by the sudden change in the social atmosphere.

>>But, having grown up with cramming education, I find the sudden shift in the social environment a bit bewildering.

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