¹«·á ·¹º§Å×½ºÆ® ¹Þ°í °­»çÆò°¡ ³²±â¸é 1,OOO¿ø ÄíÆù Áï½Ã Àû¸³!

Ȥ½Ã »çÀÌÆ®¿¡¼± ãÁö ¸øÇÑ ±Ã±ÝÇÑ Á¡ÀÌ ÀÖÀ¸¼¼¿ä?
³²°ÜÁֽŠÀ̸ÞÀÏÀ» ÅëÇØ ´äº¯ µå¸®°Ú½À´Ï´Ù.

¹®ÀÇÇϽŠ³»¿ëÀÌ ¹®ÀÚ·Î ¹ß¼ÛµÇ¿À´Ï
¿¬¶ôó¸¦ ³²°ÜÁÖ¼¼¿ä.
¾÷¹«½Ã°£ ¿ù~±Ý ¿ÀÀü9½Ã~¿ÀÈÄ6½Ã
(Á¡½É½Ã°£ ³·12½Ã~¿ÀÈÄ1½Ã)

¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ °Ô½ÃÆÇ

¿µ¾î ¸»Çϱâ¿Í ¾²±â¸¦ µ¿½Ã¿¡ Àâ´Â´Ù!

ÀڽŠÀÖ°Ô ¾µ ¼ö ÀÖ´Â ¿µÀÛ¹®À» À§ÇØ ÆÄ¿öÀ×±Û¸®½¬ ¼ö¾÷À» ¼ö°­ÇϽôÂ
ȸ¿ø´Ôµé²² ¹«·á·Î Á¦°øÇص帮´Â ºÎ°¡ ¼­ºñ½º·Î, Àü¹® ºÐ¾ß¸¦ Á¦¿ÜÇÑ ÀÚÀ¯ ÁÖÁ¦
¶Ç´Â °­»ç´ÔÀÌ ³»Áֽô °úÁ¦¸¦ ȸ¿ø´Ô²²¼­ ¿µ¾î·Î ÀÛ¼ºÇØÁֽøé,
´ã´ç °­»ç ´Ô²²¼­ ¡®¹®¹ý ¿À·ù ±³Á¤¡¯ °ú ¡®´õ ³ªÀº ¿µ¾î½Ä Ç¥Çö¡¯À¸·Î ±³Á¤ÇØÁÖ´Â
¼­ºñ½º ÀÔ´Ï´Ù.

human and war

ÀÛ¼ºÀÚ: ±Ç*Èñ
2023-10-16 1702

ȸ¿ø´ÔÀÇ ¿µÀÛ¹®

It is impossible to overcome wars even we have UN in the world for keeping our peace.

Every countries persue their own interests and benefit first even they deprive of something of other country.

We can't remove in the world because dictators are increasing more and more unfortunately like Putine, Xijinping and Hamas and so on.

We should look out destorted and blind faithfu belief toward religion.

°­»ç´ÔÀÇ Ã·»è±³Á¤ ³»¿ë

Thank you for your homework, Lily!

Keep going and never give up!

-Hanna ^^

It is impossible to overcome wars even we have UN in the world for keeping our peace.

>>It is impossible to overcome wars even though we have the UN in the world to keep our peace.
Every countries persue their own interests and benefit first even they deprive of something of other country.

>>Every country pursues its own interests and benefits first, even if it means depriving another country of something. 
We can't remove in the world because dictators are increasing more and more unfortunately like Putine, Xijinping and Hamas and so on.

>>We can't eradicate this issue in the world because dictators are increasing more and more, unfortunately, like Putin, Xi Jinping, Hamas, and so on.
We should look out destorted and blind faithfu belief toward religion.

>>We should be wary of distorted and blind faith in religion.


¹øÈ£ Á¦¸ñ ±Û¾´ÀÌ °ø°³ »óÅ µî·ÏÀÏ Á¶È¸¼ö
128488 The language I want to learn ¼Û*¿ì ¿Ï·á 2023-05-26 1193
128487 What do you like doing at the beach? ÀÓ*È£ ¿Ï·á 2023-05-26 1653
128486 What is you favorite mobile game to play? ¹Ú*Çö ¿Ï·á 2023-05-26 1475
128485 homework:When do you prefer to have a family gathering? ¾È*ȯ ¿Ï·á 2023-05-26 977
128484 Do you think it\'s fair that so much of the world\'s wealth is... ±è*¹Î ¿Ï·á 2023-05-26 5
128483 I love my self! ±è*À± ¿Ï·á 2023-05-26 1160
128482 homework Á¤*È£ ¿Ï·á 2023-05-26 0
128481 Should cell phones not be allowed in schools? ½Å*¼· ¿Ï·á 2023-05-26 1415
128480 How do you stay heathy? Do you like exercising? ¾Ù* ¿Ï·á 2023-05-26 0
128479 Friday homework ·ù*¿ì ¿Ï·á 2023-05-26 1246
128478 Homework ÀÌ*Áø ¿Ï·á 2023-05-26 1490
128477 What is the implication of having an aging population? ÀÌ*ÅÂ ¿Ï·á 2023-05-26 962
128476 What do you think is the biggest change in how families are in... ÀÌ*ÅÂ ¿Ï·á 2023-05-26 1030
128475 Homework for 05/23 ¹æ*¿¬ ¿Ï·á 2023-05-26 2
128474 Homework for 05/24 ¹æ*¿¬ ¿Ï·á 2023-05-26 1
128473 Writing task ¾È*Çü ¿Ï·á 2023-05-26 1438
128472 May.26 ¹Ú*°æ ¿Ï·á 2023-05-26 1234
128471 Answer : How important is meat in your country? Á¤*Èñ ¿Ï·á 2023-05-26 1046
128470 Submit a written output about the first impression of your... ÀÓ*Çö ¿Ï·á 2023-05-26 0
128469 The bad behavior is not good things. À±*Çý ¿Ï·á 2023-05-26 1478

HOW TO USE IT?

[¸¶ÀÌÆäÀÌÁö > ¼ö¾÷ ³»¿ë º¸±â > ÇнÀ Ķ¸°´õ > ¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ ¹öÆ° Ŭ¸¯]

¼ö¾÷ Ƚ¼ö¸¸Å­ ¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ °Ô½ÃÆÇÀÌ »ý¼ºµÇ¸ç,
Áö³­ ³¯Â¥¿¡µµ °Ô½Ã ÇÒ ¼ö ÀÖ½À´Ï´Ù.

ÁÖ5ȸ ¼ö¾÷ : ¿ù 20ȸ ÀÌ¿ë °¡´É
ÁÖ3ȸ ¼ö¾÷ : ¿ù 12ȸ ÀÌ¿ë °¡´É
ÁÖ2ȸ ¼ö¾÷ : ¿ù 08ȸ ÀÌ¿ë °¡´É
01
±³Á¤ ³»¿ëÀº ÃÖ´ë 1,000byte±îÁö ¿Ã¸± ¼ö ÀÖ½À´Ï´Ù.

÷ºÎ ÆÄÀÏÀº ¿øÈ°ÇÑ Ã·»èÀ» À§ÇÑ Âü°íÀÚ·á·Î »ç¿ëµÉ »Ó,
ÆÄÀÏ¿¡ ´ëÇÑ Ã·»èÀº ºÒ°¡´É ÇÕ´Ï´Ù.

¾÷·Îµå °¡´ÉÇÑ Ã·ºÎ ÆÄÀÏÀº ÃÖ´ë 2mb±îÁöÀ̸ç,
÷ºÎ ÇÒ ¼ö ÀÖ´Â ÆÄÀÏ Çü½ÄÀº ´ÙÀ½°ú °°½À´Ï´Ù.

¹®¼­ - PDF, TXT, DOCX,
À̹ÌÁö - JPEG, PNG, GIF
02
Àü¹® ºÐ¾ß¸¦ Á¦¿ÜÇÑ È¸¿ø´ÔÀÌ Á÷Á¢ ÀÛ¼ºÇÑ ±Û¸¸
÷»èÀÌ °¡´ÉÇϸç,

¿Ã·ÁÁֽŠ±ÛÀÇ °­»ç´Ô ÷»èÀº 24½Ã°£ À̳»¿¡
¿Ï·á µÇ´Â °ÍÀ» ¿øÄ¢À¸·Î ÇÏ°í ÀÖ½À´Ï´Ù.
03
ÇÏ·ç °Ô½Ã °¡´ÉÇÑ ±ÛÀº 3ȸ±îÁö À̸ç,
Á¾·áµÈ ¼ö¾÷ÀÇ ¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ °Ô½ÃÆÇÀº
ÀÌ¿ëÀÌ ¾î·Á¿î Á¡ ¾çÇØ ºÎŹ µå¸³´Ï´Ù.
04