¹«·á ·¹º§Å×½ºÆ® ¹Þ°í °­»çÆò°¡ ³²±â¸é 1,OOO¿ø ÄíÆù Áï½Ã Àû¸³!

Ȥ½Ã »çÀÌÆ®¿¡¼± ãÁö ¸øÇÑ ±Ã±ÝÇÑ Á¡ÀÌ ÀÖÀ¸¼¼¿ä?
³²°ÜÁֽŠÀ̸ÞÀÏÀ» ÅëÇØ ´äº¯ µå¸®°Ú½À´Ï´Ù.

¹®ÀÇÇϽŠ³»¿ëÀÌ ¹®ÀÚ·Î ¹ß¼ÛµÇ¿À´Ï
¿¬¶ôó¸¦ ³²°ÜÁÖ¼¼¿ä.
¾÷¹«½Ã°£ ¿ù~±Ý ¿ÀÀü9½Ã~¿ÀÈÄ6½Ã
(Á¡½É½Ã°£ ³·12½Ã~¿ÀÈÄ1½Ã)

¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ °Ô½ÃÆÇ

¿µ¾î ¸»Çϱâ¿Í ¾²±â¸¦ µ¿½Ã¿¡ Àâ´Â´Ù!

ÀڽŠÀÖ°Ô ¾µ ¼ö ÀÖ´Â ¿µÀÛ¹®À» À§ÇØ ÆÄ¿öÀ×±Û¸®½¬ ¼ö¾÷À» ¼ö°­ÇϽôÂ
ȸ¿ø´Ôµé²² ¹«·á·Î Á¦°øÇص帮´Â ºÎ°¡ ¼­ºñ½º·Î, Àü¹® ºÐ¾ß¸¦ Á¦¿ÜÇÑ ÀÚÀ¯ ÁÖÁ¦
¶Ç´Â °­»ç´ÔÀÌ ³»Áֽô °úÁ¦¸¦ ȸ¿ø´Ô²²¼­ ¿µ¾î·Î ÀÛ¼ºÇØÁֽøé,
´ã´ç °­»ç ´Ô²²¼­ ¡®¹®¹ý ¿À·ù ±³Á¤¡¯ °ú ¡®´õ ³ªÀº ¿µ¾î½Ä Ç¥Çö¡¯À¸·Î ±³Á¤ÇØÁÖ´Â
¼­ºñ½º ÀÔ´Ï´Ù.

231013 Homework

ÀÛ¼ºÀÚ: ¹Ú*Çý
2023-10-13 2070

ȸ¿ø´ÔÀÇ ¿µÀÛ¹®

Q. What's your favorite food to have on the weekend?
A. These days there is popular snack in korea. The name is Thanghuru. It is melting sugar on the fruit Skewer. It became popular from the youtube with twinkle visuals and ASMR. So some peoples hate that Because it¡¯s so sweet very much. But I like that and Most my friends also like that. So when i had plan to meet my friends, i most ate thanghuru after meal. How about you? Did you try that?

°­»ç´ÔÀÇ Ã·»è±³Á¤ ³»¿ë

Hi Su Hye!
Unfortunately, I haven't tried it.
I would like to because I have a sweet tooth.
Anyway, thank you for your effort today.
I hope you have a nice weekend.
Try to review the corrections below.^^
~~ Teacher Sharon
These days there is popular snack in korea. 
>> These days, there is a popular snack in Korea. 
The name is Thanghuru. 
>> Correct
It is melting sugar on the fruit Skewer. 
>> It is melted sugar on a fruit skewer.
It became popular from the youtube with twinkle visuals and ASMR. 
>> It became popular through YouTube because of twinkling visuals and ASMR. 
So some peoples hate that Because it¡¯s so sweet very much. 
>> Some people hate it because it's too sweet for them. 
But I like that and Most my friends also like that. 
>> However I like it and most of my friends like it as well. 
So when i had plan to meet my friends, i most ate thanghuru after meal. 
>> So, I usually have thanghuru after my meal whenever I meet my friends. 
How about you? 
>> Correct
Did you try that?
>> Have you tried it?
¹øÈ£ Á¦¸ñ ±Û¾´ÀÌ °ø°³ »óÅ µî·ÏÀÏ Á¶È¸¼ö
131740 HOMEWORK: Please write a short paragraph about ¡°Do you feel... ¾Ù* ¿Ï·á 2023-10-18 0
131739 Give simple steps of conserving water consumption in a few... ÀÌ*ÁÖ ¿Ï·á 2023-10-18 1718
131738 pollution ±è*¿¬ ¿Ï·á 2023-10-18 0
131737 Good and bad habits ÀÌ*±Ô ¿Ï·á 2023-10-18 2253
131736 Homework ·ù*¿ì ¿Ï·á 2023-10-18 1026
131735 Is it important to compare ourselves to others? Why or why not? ÀÌ*ÅÂ ¿Ï·á 2023-10-18 1211
131734 the aim of university Á¤*¾È ¿Ï·á 2023-10-18 2
131733 Would you let someone close to you handle your savings? Why or... ÀÌ*ÅÂ ¿Ï·á 2023-10-18 1611
131732 What are the dangers of having your own business? ±è*±¹ ¿Ï·á 2023-10-18 1
131731 Most people consider meetings and conferences to be boring, why... ±è*¾Æ ¿Ï·á 2023-10-18 1
131730 homework ¾È*¿¬ ¿Ï·á 2023-10-18 1396
131729 Home work ±è*Çý ¿Ï·á 2023-10-18 1108
131728 Saving water, reducing disposable products, and using public... À±*Çý ¿Ï·á 2023-10-18 1469
131727 Letter ±Ç*Á¤ ¿Ï·á 2023-10-18 2
131726 globalization is a phenomenon in which people from many... À±*Çý ¿Ï·á 2023-10-18 1252
131725 homework: I love you, teacher :) À±*Çý ¿Ï·á 2023-10-18 1302
131724 If you could have it your way, how would you like to spend your... ½Å*Á¤ ¿Ï·á 2023-10-18 1858
131723 homework ¼Õ*Èñ ¿Ï·á 2023-10-18 1
131722 plastic ±Ç*Èñ ¿Ï·á 2023-10-18 1556
131721 HOMEWORK ±è*Áö ¿Ï·á 2023-10-18 1209

HOW TO USE IT?

[¸¶ÀÌÆäÀÌÁö > ¼ö¾÷ ³»¿ë º¸±â > ÇнÀ Ķ¸°´õ > ¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ ¹öÆ° Ŭ¸¯]

¼ö¾÷ Ƚ¼ö¸¸Å­ ¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ °Ô½ÃÆÇÀÌ »ý¼ºµÇ¸ç,
Áö³­ ³¯Â¥¿¡µµ °Ô½Ã ÇÒ ¼ö ÀÖ½À´Ï´Ù.

ÁÖ5ȸ ¼ö¾÷ : ¿ù 20ȸ ÀÌ¿ë °¡´É
ÁÖ3ȸ ¼ö¾÷ : ¿ù 12ȸ ÀÌ¿ë °¡´É
ÁÖ2ȸ ¼ö¾÷ : ¿ù 08ȸ ÀÌ¿ë °¡´É
01
±³Á¤ ³»¿ëÀº ÃÖ´ë 1,000byte±îÁö ¿Ã¸± ¼ö ÀÖ½À´Ï´Ù.

÷ºÎ ÆÄÀÏÀº ¿øÈ°ÇÑ Ã·»èÀ» À§ÇÑ Âü°íÀÚ·á·Î »ç¿ëµÉ »Ó,
ÆÄÀÏ¿¡ ´ëÇÑ Ã·»èÀº ºÒ°¡´É ÇÕ´Ï´Ù.

¾÷·Îµå °¡´ÉÇÑ Ã·ºÎ ÆÄÀÏÀº ÃÖ´ë 2mb±îÁöÀ̸ç,
÷ºÎ ÇÒ ¼ö ÀÖ´Â ÆÄÀÏ Çü½ÄÀº ´ÙÀ½°ú °°½À´Ï´Ù.

¹®¼­ - PDF, TXT, DOCX,
À̹ÌÁö - JPEG, PNG, GIF
02
Àü¹® ºÐ¾ß¸¦ Á¦¿ÜÇÑ È¸¿ø´ÔÀÌ Á÷Á¢ ÀÛ¼ºÇÑ ±Û¸¸
÷»èÀÌ °¡´ÉÇϸç,

¿Ã·ÁÁֽŠ±ÛÀÇ °­»ç´Ô ÷»èÀº 24½Ã°£ À̳»¿¡
¿Ï·á µÇ´Â °ÍÀ» ¿øÄ¢À¸·Î ÇÏ°í ÀÖ½À´Ï´Ù.
03
ÇÏ·ç °Ô½Ã °¡´ÉÇÑ ±ÛÀº 3ȸ±îÁö À̸ç,
Á¾·áµÈ ¼ö¾÷ÀÇ ¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ °Ô½ÃÆÇÀº
ÀÌ¿ëÀÌ ¾î·Á¿î Á¡ ¾çÇØ ºÎŹ µå¸³´Ï´Ù.
04