¹«·á ·¹º§Å×½ºÆ® ¹Þ°í °­»çÆò°¡ ³²±â¸é 1,OOO¿ø ÄíÆù Áï½Ã Àû¸³!

Ȥ½Ã »çÀÌÆ®¿¡¼± ãÁö ¸øÇÑ ±Ã±ÝÇÑ Á¡ÀÌ ÀÖÀ¸¼¼¿ä?
³²°ÜÁֽŠÀ̸ÞÀÏÀ» ÅëÇØ ´äº¯ µå¸®°Ú½À´Ï´Ù.

¹®ÀÇÇϽŠ³»¿ëÀÌ ¹®ÀÚ·Î ¹ß¼ÛµÇ¿À´Ï
¿¬¶ôó¸¦ ³²°ÜÁÖ¼¼¿ä.
¾÷¹«½Ã°£ ¿ù~±Ý ¿ÀÀü9½Ã~¿ÀÈÄ6½Ã
(Á¡½É½Ã°£ ³·12½Ã~¿ÀÈÄ1½Ã)

¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ °Ô½ÃÆÇ

¿µ¾î ¸»Çϱâ¿Í ¾²±â¸¦ µ¿½Ã¿¡ Àâ´Â´Ù!

ÀڽŠÀÖ°Ô ¾µ ¼ö ÀÖ´Â ¿µÀÛ¹®À» À§ÇØ ÆÄ¿öÀ×±Û¸®½¬ ¼ö¾÷À» ¼ö°­ÇϽôÂ
ȸ¿ø´Ôµé²² ¹«·á·Î Á¦°øÇص帮´Â ºÎ°¡ ¼­ºñ½º·Î, Àü¹® ºÐ¾ß¸¦ Á¦¿ÜÇÑ ÀÚÀ¯ ÁÖÁ¦
¶Ç´Â °­»ç´ÔÀÌ ³»Áֽô °úÁ¦¸¦ ȸ¿ø´Ô²²¼­ ¿µ¾î·Î ÀÛ¼ºÇØÁֽøé,
´ã´ç °­»ç ´Ô²²¼­ ¡®¹®¹ý ¿À·ù ±³Á¤¡¯ °ú ¡®´õ ³ªÀº ¿µ¾î½Ä Ç¥Çö¡¯À¸·Î ±³Á¤ÇØÁÖ´Â
¼­ºñ½º ÀÔ´Ï´Ù.

homework 10.12

ÀÛ¼ºÀÚ: ÃÖ*Ç
2023-10-12 823

ȸ¿ø´ÔÀÇ ¿µÀÛ¹®

~ Writing Task:
Please answer the question:
Why is sanitation important when it comes to food preparation?

Sanitation is also important because food is out essential element.
When we need the process of cooking food clean, cooking tools also need to be clean.
The reason why, food goes into our bodies.
If the food hygiene is too bad, our bodies can get diseases like a food poisoning.
This disease can be dangerous to weak healthy people.
So, for health, we should clean cook food, and where we eat food location is also important.
The problem is, some people still don't follow sanitation.
So some people don't like eating at restaurants.

°­»ç´ÔÀÇ Ã·»è±³Á¤ ³»¿ë

Good day, Keon!
Thank you so much for taking time in answering the question. Your ideas and opinions are on point. Keep it up! :)
~ T. Camille


~ Writing Task:
Please answer the question:
Why is sanitation important when it comes to food preparation?


Sanitation is also important because food is out essential element.
>> Sanitation is also important because food is an essential element for survival.
When we need the process of cooking food clean, cooking tools also need to be clean.
>> CORRECT!
The reason why, food goes into our bodies.
>> The reason it that food goes into our bodies.
If the food hygiene is too bad, our bodies can get diseases like a food poisoning.
>> If the food hygiene is too bad, our bodies can get diseases like food poisoning.
This disease can be dangerous to weak healthy people.
>> This disease can be dangerous to people with weak immunity.
So, for health, we should clean cook food, and where we eat food location is also important.
>> So, for health, we should make sure that everything is clean before cooking it, and the food stalls' location is also important.
The problem is, some people still don't follow sanitation.
>> CORRECT!
So some people don't like eating at restaurants.
>> CORRECT!

¹øÈ£ Á¦¸ñ ±Û¾´ÀÌ °ø°³ »óÅ µî·ÏÀÏ Á¶È¸¼ö
132460 My wish ¼Û*¿ì ¿Ï·á 2023-11-15 483
132459 homework ÀÌ*¼÷ ¿Ï·á 2023-11-15 1927
132458 Should schools have more field trips? Why? ÀÓ*È£ ¿Ï·á 2023-11-15 1021
132457 Feeling pressure about my future ÀÌ*¼Ö ¿Ï·á 2023-11-15 951
132456 Do you like playing sports? ±Ç*¸ð ¿Ï·á 2023-11-15 1185
132455 In English, there are sick jokes, private jokes, cruel jokes,... ¿¡*¹Ì ¿Ï·á 2023-11-15 3
132454 HOMEWORK: Please write a short paragraph about \"Do you still... ¾Ù* ¿Ï·á 2023-11-15 0
132453 homework Á¤*È£ ¿Ï·á 2023-11-15 0
132452 Homework ±è* ¿Ï·á 2023-11-15 0
132451 I like almost all kinds of dishes. À±*Çý ¿Ï·á 2023-11-15 1291
132450 Homework Á¤*ȯ ¿Ï·á 2023-11-15 2
132449 I would not spend more time with my computer. ¹Ú*À² ¿Ï·á 2023-11-15 1135
132448 Homework ·ù*¿ì ¿Ï·á 2023-11-15 800
132447 homework_231114 ÇÑ*·Ï ¿Ï·á 2023-11-15 0
132446 How do you spend your time? ÀÌ*¼º ¿Ï·á 2023-11-15 8
132445 WRITING TASK: How can joining an organization help an individual? ÀÓ*Áö ¿Ï·á 2023-11-15 2
132444 homework ±è*¸° ¿Ï·á 2023-11-15 1
132443 DIARY ±è*¿¬ ¿Ï·á 2023-11-15 1
132442 diary ±è*¿¬ ¿Ï·á 2023-11-15 2
132441 homework Á¤*¾È ¿Ï·á 2023-11-15 1

HOW TO USE IT?

[¸¶ÀÌÆäÀÌÁö > ¼ö¾÷ ³»¿ë º¸±â > ÇнÀ Ķ¸°´õ > ¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ ¹öÆ° Ŭ¸¯]

¼ö¾÷ Ƚ¼ö¸¸Å­ ¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ °Ô½ÃÆÇÀÌ »ý¼ºµÇ¸ç,
Áö³­ ³¯Â¥¿¡µµ °Ô½Ã ÇÒ ¼ö ÀÖ½À´Ï´Ù.

ÁÖ5ȸ ¼ö¾÷ : ¿ù 20ȸ ÀÌ¿ë °¡´É
ÁÖ3ȸ ¼ö¾÷ : ¿ù 12ȸ ÀÌ¿ë °¡´É
ÁÖ2ȸ ¼ö¾÷ : ¿ù 08ȸ ÀÌ¿ë °¡´É
01
±³Á¤ ³»¿ëÀº ÃÖ´ë 1,000byte±îÁö ¿Ã¸± ¼ö ÀÖ½À´Ï´Ù.

÷ºÎ ÆÄÀÏÀº ¿øÈ°ÇÑ Ã·»èÀ» À§ÇÑ Âü°íÀÚ·á·Î »ç¿ëµÉ »Ó,
ÆÄÀÏ¿¡ ´ëÇÑ Ã·»èÀº ºÒ°¡´É ÇÕ´Ï´Ù.

¾÷·Îµå °¡´ÉÇÑ Ã·ºÎ ÆÄÀÏÀº ÃÖ´ë 2mb±îÁöÀ̸ç,
÷ºÎ ÇÒ ¼ö ÀÖ´Â ÆÄÀÏ Çü½ÄÀº ´ÙÀ½°ú °°½À´Ï´Ù.

¹®¼­ - PDF, TXT, DOCX,
À̹ÌÁö - JPEG, PNG, GIF
02
Àü¹® ºÐ¾ß¸¦ Á¦¿ÜÇÑ È¸¿ø´ÔÀÌ Á÷Á¢ ÀÛ¼ºÇÑ ±Û¸¸
÷»èÀÌ °¡´ÉÇϸç,

¿Ã·ÁÁֽŠ±ÛÀÇ °­»ç´Ô ÷»èÀº 24½Ã°£ À̳»¿¡
¿Ï·á µÇ´Â °ÍÀ» ¿øÄ¢À¸·Î ÇÏ°í ÀÖ½À´Ï´Ù.
03
ÇÏ·ç °Ô½Ã °¡´ÉÇÑ ±ÛÀº 3ȸ±îÁö À̸ç,
Á¾·áµÈ ¼ö¾÷ÀÇ ¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ °Ô½ÃÆÇÀº
ÀÌ¿ëÀÌ ¾î·Á¿î Á¡ ¾çÇØ ºÎŹ µå¸³´Ï´Ù.
04