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영작교정 게시판

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자신 있게 쓸 수 있는 영작문을 위해 파워잉글리쉬 수업을 수강하시는
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What do you consider to be your weakness?

작성자: 이*윤
2023-10-09 1090

회원님의 영작문

I consider there are two weaknesses.
First I have to say that I'm a little perfectionist, so I get too tired easily because I'm sensitive and concentrate on my work.
My former coworkers often told me that I have low physical strength so that I get too tired easily.
It did really affect my job performance capability, I felt like it was a too inconvenient.
So, I am still working out hard to increase my physical strength.
Last, I know that communication is each other.
However, I'm talkative and surface my feeling on my face.
Don't get me wrong. It's not that I communicate one way or ignore others.
But I found myself doing it casually while I was concentrated on my work.
This discovery had led me to become more careful about talking to coworkers and superiors, successors.

강사님의 첨삭교정 내용

Hi, Yun! This is great. Well done! My additional suggestion would be to elaborate more on how you are actively working to improve your weakness, making it sound more appealing to the interviewer. This way, it will seem like a weakness that won't affect your performance in the company. Thanks for this, again. See you in class!
~T. Jade^^
Homework: What do you consider to be your weakness?
I consider there are two weaknesses.
>> I consider that there are two weaknesses.
>> OR: I believe that I have two weaknesses.
First I have to say that I'm a little perfectionist, so I get too tired easily because I'm sensitive and concentrate on my work.
>> First, I have to say that I'm a bit of a perfectionist, so I easily get tired because I'm sensitive and focused on my work.
My former coworkers often told me that I have low physical strength so that I get too tired easily.
>> My former coworkers often told me that I have low physical strength, which makes me get tired easily.
It did really affect my job performance capability, I felt like it was a too inconvenient.
>> It did really affect my job performance capability; I felt like it was too inconvenient.
So, I am still working out hard to increase my physical strength.
>> Correct
Last, I know that communication is each other.
>> Lastly, I understand that communication is a two-way street.
However, I'm talkative and surface my feeling on my face.
>> However, I'm talkative, and my feelings are often visible on my face.
>> OR: But I like to talk, and you can often tell how I'm feeling by the look on my face.
Don't get me wrong. 
>> Correct
It's not that I communicate one way or ignore others.
>> Correct
>> OR: It's not that I talk to some people in a certain way and ignore others.
But I found myself doing it casually while I was concentrated on my work.
>> Correct
This discovery had led me to become more careful about talking to coworkers and superiors, successors.
>> This discovery has led me to be more careful when communicating with coworkers, superiors, and successors.

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