¹«·á ·¹º§Å×½ºÆ® ¹Þ°í °­»çÆò°¡ ³²±â¸é 1,OOO¿ø ÄíÆù Áï½Ã Àû¸³!

Ȥ½Ã »çÀÌÆ®¿¡¼± ãÁö ¸øÇÑ ±Ã±ÝÇÑ Á¡ÀÌ ÀÖÀ¸¼¼¿ä?
³²°ÜÁֽŠÀ̸ÞÀÏÀ» ÅëÇØ ´äº¯ µå¸®°Ú½À´Ï´Ù.

¹®ÀÇÇϽŠ³»¿ëÀÌ ¹®ÀÚ·Î ¹ß¼ÛµÇ¿À´Ï
¿¬¶ôó¸¦ ³²°ÜÁÖ¼¼¿ä.
¾÷¹«½Ã°£ ¿ù~±Ý ¿ÀÀü9½Ã~¿ÀÈÄ6½Ã
(Á¡½É½Ã°£ ³·12½Ã~¿ÀÈÄ1½Ã)

¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ °Ô½ÃÆÇ

¿µ¾î ¸»Çϱâ¿Í ¾²±â¸¦ µ¿½Ã¿¡ Àâ´Â´Ù!

ÀڽŠÀÖ°Ô ¾µ ¼ö ÀÖ´Â ¿µÀÛ¹®À» À§ÇØ ÆÄ¿öÀ×±Û¸®½¬ ¼ö¾÷À» ¼ö°­ÇϽôÂ
ȸ¿ø´Ôµé²² ¹«·á·Î Á¦°øÇص帮´Â ºÎ°¡ ¼­ºñ½º·Î, Àü¹® ºÐ¾ß¸¦ Á¦¿ÜÇÑ ÀÚÀ¯ ÁÖÁ¦
¶Ç´Â °­»ç´ÔÀÌ ³»Áֽô °úÁ¦¸¦ ȸ¿ø´Ô²²¼­ ¿µ¾î·Î ÀÛ¼ºÇØÁֽøé,
´ã´ç °­»ç ´Ô²²¼­ ¡®¹®¹ý ¿À·ù ±³Á¤¡¯ °ú ¡®´õ ³ªÀº ¿µ¾î½Ä Ç¥Çö¡¯À¸·Î ±³Á¤ÇØÁÖ´Â
¼­ºñ½º ÀÔ´Ï´Ù.

Homework

ÀÛ¼ºÀÚ: ½Å*È­
2023-10-06 1788

ȸ¿ø´ÔÀÇ ¿µÀÛ¹®

My husband and children had weak intestines and would often go away. I learned how to cook because I couldn't cook, and because I wasn't interested in health, I didn't care about it, but I studied by listening to lectures on nutritional health and lifestyle habits for the health of my family. So I changed the water, the cooking utensils, the detergents, and most of all, the food I eat. Before, I ate a lot of instant food and delivery food, but now I try to cook my own food and not use a lot of seasoning. Fortunately, with a lot of effort, my family's intestines have improved a lot.

°­»ç´ÔÀÇ Ã·»è±³Á¤ ³»¿ë

Hi there Eliana, 
I've noticed that most Koreans have weak stomachs, and with that, you become more concerned about the food that you eat. This is also one thing that I've learned, not all food is beneficial ( I am not referring to junk or instant food). Take care!
Aki~

My husband and children had weak intestines and would often go away.
>>> CORRECT!

I learned how to cook because I couldn't cook, and because I wasn't interested in health, I didn't care about it, but I studied by listening to lectures on nutritional health and lifestyle habits for the health of my family.
>>> CORRECT!

So I changed the water, the cooking utensils, the detergents, and most of all, the food I eat.
>>> So I changed our drinking water, cooking utensils, detergents, and most of all, the food I eat.

Before, I ate a lot of instant food and delivery food, but now I try to cook my own food and not use a lot of seasoning.
>>>  Before, I ate a lot of instant and delivery food, but now I try to cook my own food and not use a lot of seasoning.


Fortunately, with a lot of effort, my family's intestines have improved a lot.
>>> CORRECT!
>>> Thankfully, with a lot of precaution, my family's health has improved.
¹øÈ£ Á¦¸ñ ±Û¾´ÀÌ °ø°³ »óÅ µî·ÏÀÏ Á¶È¸¼ö
131878 Homework Á¤*ȯ ¿Ï·á 2023-10-24 1518
131877 After school, convenience store. ±è*¹Î ¿Ï·á 2023-10-24 1359
131876 Homework ·ù*¿ì ¿Ï·á 2023-10-24 1846
131875 About my lunch break during workdays. ±Ç*ÀÏ ¿Ï·á 2023-10-24 3
131874 Why do so many people love traveling? ½Å*Á¤ ¿Ï·á 2023-10-24 1786
131873 homework Á¤*¾È ¿Ï·á 2023-10-24 1
131872 WRITING TASK: What is the best place for a picnic? ÀÓ*Áö ¿Ï·á 2023-10-24 3
131871 Homework ±Ç*¹Ì ¿Ï·á 2023-10-24 0
131870 Homework ±Ç*¹Ì ¿Ï·á 2023-10-24 0
131869 In your case, how do you usually celebrate Christmas? ÀÌ*Èñ ¿Ï·á 2023-10-24 2
131868 Homework ±Ç*¹Ì ¿Ï·á 2023-10-24 0
131867 How to influence ¾ç*¿¬ ¿Ï·á 2023-10-24 992
131866 hello ±è*¿¬ ¿Ï·á 2023-10-24 3
131865 tour ±Ç*Èñ ¿Ï·á 2023-10-24 1200
131864 Have you ever planned to work in a hospital? ·ù*¿ø ¿Ï·á 2023-10-24 3
131863 Do you like attending family gatherings? ·ù*¿ø ¿Ï·á 2023-10-24 3
131862 23.Oct.2023 ±è*Á¤ ¿Ï·á 2023-10-24 1
131861 Are there any special holidays or celebrations that people might... ÀÌ*ºó ¿Ï·á 2023-10-24 1624
131860 HOMEWORK _1 ¼Û*È­ ¿Ï·á 2023-10-24 1202
131859 Homework ±Ç*¹Ì ¿Ï·á 2023-10-23 1

HOW TO USE IT?

[¸¶ÀÌÆäÀÌÁö > ¼ö¾÷ ³»¿ë º¸±â > ÇнÀ Ķ¸°´õ > ¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ ¹öÆ° Ŭ¸¯]

¼ö¾÷ Ƚ¼ö¸¸Å­ ¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ °Ô½ÃÆÇÀÌ »ý¼ºµÇ¸ç,
Áö³­ ³¯Â¥¿¡µµ °Ô½Ã ÇÒ ¼ö ÀÖ½À´Ï´Ù.

ÁÖ5ȸ ¼ö¾÷ : ¿ù 20ȸ ÀÌ¿ë °¡´É
ÁÖ3ȸ ¼ö¾÷ : ¿ù 12ȸ ÀÌ¿ë °¡´É
ÁÖ2ȸ ¼ö¾÷ : ¿ù 08ȸ ÀÌ¿ë °¡´É
01
±³Á¤ ³»¿ëÀº ÃÖ´ë 1,000byte±îÁö ¿Ã¸± ¼ö ÀÖ½À´Ï´Ù.

÷ºÎ ÆÄÀÏÀº ¿øÈ°ÇÑ Ã·»èÀ» À§ÇÑ Âü°íÀÚ·á·Î »ç¿ëµÉ »Ó,
ÆÄÀÏ¿¡ ´ëÇÑ Ã·»èÀº ºÒ°¡´É ÇÕ´Ï´Ù.

¾÷·Îµå °¡´ÉÇÑ Ã·ºÎ ÆÄÀÏÀº ÃÖ´ë 2mb±îÁöÀ̸ç,
÷ºÎ ÇÒ ¼ö ÀÖ´Â ÆÄÀÏ Çü½ÄÀº ´ÙÀ½°ú °°½À´Ï´Ù.

¹®¼­ - PDF, TXT, DOCX,
À̹ÌÁö - JPEG, PNG, GIF
02
Àü¹® ºÐ¾ß¸¦ Á¦¿ÜÇÑ È¸¿ø´ÔÀÌ Á÷Á¢ ÀÛ¼ºÇÑ ±Û¸¸
÷»èÀÌ °¡´ÉÇϸç,

¿Ã·ÁÁֽŠ±ÛÀÇ °­»ç´Ô ÷»èÀº 24½Ã°£ À̳»¿¡
¿Ï·á µÇ´Â °ÍÀ» ¿øÄ¢À¸·Î ÇÏ°í ÀÖ½À´Ï´Ù.
03
ÇÏ·ç °Ô½Ã °¡´ÉÇÑ ±ÛÀº 3ȸ±îÁö À̸ç,
Á¾·áµÈ ¼ö¾÷ÀÇ ¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ °Ô½ÃÆÇÀº
ÀÌ¿ëÀÌ ¾î·Á¿î Á¡ ¾çÇØ ºÎŹ µå¸³´Ï´Ù.
04