¹«·á ·¹º§Å×½ºÆ® ¹Þ°í °­»çÆò°¡ ³²±â¸é 1,OOO¿ø ÄíÆù Áï½Ã Àû¸³!

Ȥ½Ã »çÀÌÆ®¿¡¼± ãÁö ¸øÇÑ ±Ã±ÝÇÑ Á¡ÀÌ ÀÖÀ¸¼¼¿ä?
³²°ÜÁֽŠÀ̸ÞÀÏÀ» ÅëÇØ ´äº¯ µå¸®°Ú½À´Ï´Ù.

¹®ÀÇÇϽŠ³»¿ëÀÌ ¹®ÀÚ·Î ¹ß¼ÛµÇ¿À´Ï
¿¬¶ôó¸¦ ³²°ÜÁÖ¼¼¿ä.
¾÷¹«½Ã°£ ¿ù~±Ý ¿ÀÀü9½Ã~¿ÀÈÄ6½Ã
(Á¡½É½Ã°£ ³·12½Ã~¿ÀÈÄ1½Ã)

¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ °Ô½ÃÆÇ

¿µ¾î ¸»Çϱâ¿Í ¾²±â¸¦ µ¿½Ã¿¡ Àâ´Â´Ù!

ÀڽŠÀÖ°Ô ¾µ ¼ö ÀÖ´Â ¿µÀÛ¹®À» À§ÇØ ÆÄ¿öÀ×±Û¸®½¬ ¼ö¾÷À» ¼ö°­ÇϽôÂ
ȸ¿ø´Ôµé²² ¹«·á·Î Á¦°øÇص帮´Â ºÎ°¡ ¼­ºñ½º·Î, Àü¹® ºÐ¾ß¸¦ Á¦¿ÜÇÑ ÀÚÀ¯ ÁÖÁ¦
¶Ç´Â °­»ç´ÔÀÌ ³»Áֽô °úÁ¦¸¦ ȸ¿ø´Ô²²¼­ ¿µ¾î·Î ÀÛ¼ºÇØÁֽøé,
´ã´ç °­»ç ´Ô²²¼­ ¡®¹®¹ý ¿À·ù ±³Á¤¡¯ °ú ¡®´õ ³ªÀº ¿µ¾î½Ä Ç¥Çö¡¯À¸·Î ±³Á¤ÇØÁÖ´Â
¼­ºñ½º ÀÔ´Ï´Ù.

caffeinated drinks

ÀÛ¼ºÀÚ: ±Ç*Èñ
2023-10-05 2012

ȸ¿ø´ÔÀÇ ¿µÀÛ¹®

I very often see that teenagers drink caffeinated drinks in the street and stores.

I am one of those people who concerned about caffeninated drinks in adolescents.

I know the reason of their drinking.

They need to overcome sleeping when they should study at night.

The adult who want to earn money sell harmful drinks to them with low price.

Capitalism let us human conscience and values.

°­»ç´ÔÀÇ Ã·»è±³Á¤ ³»¿ë

Hi, Ms. Lily!
I think that is one effect of capitalism. They no longer value the wellness of their customers especially if they are selling food products. I understand them but I don't agree with their practices. With the high level of competition among sellers, I guess they are prompt to do such a thing.
See you in class.
Aki~

I very often see that teenagers drink caffeinated drinks in the street and stores.
>>> I often see teenagers drink caffeinated drinks on the street and in stores.

I am one of those people who concerned about caffeninated drinks in adolescents.
>>> I am one of those people who is concerned about caffeinated drinks in adolescents.

I know the reason of their drinking.
>>> I know the reason for their drinking.

They need to overcome sleeping when they should study at night.
>>> CORRECT!

The adult who want to earn money sell harmful drinks to them with low price.
>>> Adults who want to earn money sell harmful drinks to them at a low price

Capitalism let us human conscience and values.
>>> Capitalism lets us have human conscience and values.

¹øÈ£ Á¦¸ñ ±Û¾´ÀÌ °ø°³ »óÅ µî·ÏÀÏ Á¶È¸¼ö
128921 Which artists/bands do you want to see at a music festival? ÀÌ*ÅÂ ¿Ï·á 2023-06-19 1848
128920 How good are you at playing sports? How could you be better? ÀÌ*ÅÂ ¿Ï·á 2023-06-19 830
128919 19.Jun.2023 ±è*Á¤ ¿Ï·á 2023-06-19 1
128918 How would you describe a very relaxing vacation? ÀÌ*ÅÂ ¿Ï·á 2023-06-19 723
128917 Homework ·ù*¿ì ¿Ï·á 2023-06-19 1105
128916 Opinion about transportation expense ±è*È£ ¿Ï·á 2023-06-19 1495
128915 If you are leader, is it important for you to consult other... ±¸*¹Ì ¿Ï·á 2023-06-19 1
128914 half day ¹Î*Á¤ ¿Ï·á 2023-06-19 1
128913 I think the death penalty should also be applied. À±*Çý ¿Ï·á 2023-06-19 1047
128912 The way to maintain business call ¼º*°æ ¿Ï·á 2023-06-19 1506
128911 I like going together and going alone. À±*Çý ¿Ï·á 2023-06-19 1430
128910 inferiority complex ±Ç*Èñ ¿Ï·á 2023-06-19 1288
128909 Which do you think is the best season for a vacation? ÀÓ*È£ ¿Ï·á 2023-06-19 0
128908 Homework ¿À*ºó ¿Ï·á 2023-06-19 0
128907 Homework ½Å*È­ ¿Ï·á 2023-06-18 1322
128906 Homework 6/16 ±è*¾Æ ¿Ï·á 2023-06-18 2
128905 How good are you at interacting with people face-to-face? ±è*±¹ ¿Ï·á 2023-06-18 1
128904 Homework ÇÔ*ÁÖ ¿Ï·á 2023-06-18 1
128903 Homework ±è*¿ì ¿Ï·á 2023-06-18 1004
128902 Writing Task 0616 À¯*Èñ ¿Ï·á 2023-06-18 0

HOW TO USE IT?

[¸¶ÀÌÆäÀÌÁö > ¼ö¾÷ ³»¿ë º¸±â > ÇнÀ Ķ¸°´õ > ¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ ¹öÆ° Ŭ¸¯]

¼ö¾÷ Ƚ¼ö¸¸Å­ ¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ °Ô½ÃÆÇÀÌ »ý¼ºµÇ¸ç,
Áö³­ ³¯Â¥¿¡µµ °Ô½Ã ÇÒ ¼ö ÀÖ½À´Ï´Ù.

ÁÖ5ȸ ¼ö¾÷ : ¿ù 20ȸ ÀÌ¿ë °¡´É
ÁÖ3ȸ ¼ö¾÷ : ¿ù 12ȸ ÀÌ¿ë °¡´É
ÁÖ2ȸ ¼ö¾÷ : ¿ù 08ȸ ÀÌ¿ë °¡´É
01
±³Á¤ ³»¿ëÀº ÃÖ´ë 1,000byte±îÁö ¿Ã¸± ¼ö ÀÖ½À´Ï´Ù.

÷ºÎ ÆÄÀÏÀº ¿øÈ°ÇÑ Ã·»èÀ» À§ÇÑ Âü°íÀÚ·á·Î »ç¿ëµÉ »Ó,
ÆÄÀÏ¿¡ ´ëÇÑ Ã·»èÀº ºÒ°¡´É ÇÕ´Ï´Ù.

¾÷·Îµå °¡´ÉÇÑ Ã·ºÎ ÆÄÀÏÀº ÃÖ´ë 2mb±îÁöÀ̸ç,
÷ºÎ ÇÒ ¼ö ÀÖ´Â ÆÄÀÏ Çü½ÄÀº ´ÙÀ½°ú °°½À´Ï´Ù.

¹®¼­ - PDF, TXT, DOCX,
À̹ÌÁö - JPEG, PNG, GIF
02
Àü¹® ºÐ¾ß¸¦ Á¦¿ÜÇÑ È¸¿ø´ÔÀÌ Á÷Á¢ ÀÛ¼ºÇÑ ±Û¸¸
÷»èÀÌ °¡´ÉÇϸç,

¿Ã·ÁÁֽŠ±ÛÀÇ °­»ç´Ô ÷»èÀº 24½Ã°£ À̳»¿¡
¿Ï·á µÇ´Â °ÍÀ» ¿øÄ¢À¸·Î ÇÏ°í ÀÖ½À´Ï´Ù.
03
ÇÏ·ç °Ô½Ã °¡´ÉÇÑ ±ÛÀº 3ȸ±îÁö À̸ç,
Á¾·áµÈ ¼ö¾÷ÀÇ ¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ °Ô½ÃÆÇÀº
ÀÌ¿ëÀÌ ¾î·Á¿î Á¡ ¾çÇØ ºÎŹ µå¸³´Ï´Ù.
04