¹«·á ·¹º§Å×½ºÆ® ¹Þ°í °­»çÆò°¡ ³²±â¸é 1,OOO¿ø ÄíÆù Áï½Ã Àû¸³!

Ȥ½Ã »çÀÌÆ®¿¡¼± ãÁö ¸øÇÑ ±Ã±ÝÇÑ Á¡ÀÌ ÀÖÀ¸¼¼¿ä?
³²°ÜÁֽŠÀ̸ÞÀÏÀ» ÅëÇØ ´äº¯ µå¸®°Ú½À´Ï´Ù.

¹®ÀÇÇϽŠ³»¿ëÀÌ ¹®ÀÚ·Î ¹ß¼ÛµÇ¿À´Ï
¿¬¶ôó¸¦ ³²°ÜÁÖ¼¼¿ä.
¾÷¹«½Ã°£ ¿ù~±Ý ¿ÀÀü9½Ã~¿ÀÈÄ6½Ã
(Á¡½É½Ã°£ ³·12½Ã~¿ÀÈÄ1½Ã)

¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ °Ô½ÃÆÇ

¿µ¾î ¸»Çϱâ¿Í ¾²±â¸¦ µ¿½Ã¿¡ Àâ´Â´Ù!

ÀڽŠÀÖ°Ô ¾µ ¼ö ÀÖ´Â ¿µÀÛ¹®À» À§ÇØ ÆÄ¿öÀ×±Û¸®½¬ ¼ö¾÷À» ¼ö°­ÇϽôÂ
ȸ¿ø´Ôµé²² ¹«·á·Î Á¦°øÇص帮´Â ºÎ°¡ ¼­ºñ½º·Î, Àü¹® ºÐ¾ß¸¦ Á¦¿ÜÇÑ ÀÚÀ¯ ÁÖÁ¦
¶Ç´Â °­»ç´ÔÀÌ ³»Áֽô °úÁ¦¸¦ ȸ¿ø´Ô²²¼­ ¿µ¾î·Î ÀÛ¼ºÇØÁֽøé,
´ã´ç °­»ç ´Ô²²¼­ ¡®¹®¹ý ¿À·ù ±³Á¤¡¯ °ú ¡®´õ ³ªÀº ¿µ¾î½Ä Ç¥Çö¡¯À¸·Î ±³Á¤ÇØÁÖ´Â
¼­ºñ½º ÀÔ´Ï´Ù.

caffeinated drinks

ÀÛ¼ºÀÚ: ±Ç*Èñ
2023-10-05 1873

ȸ¿ø´ÔÀÇ ¿µÀÛ¹®

I very often see that teenagers drink caffeinated drinks in the street and stores.

I am one of those people who concerned about caffeninated drinks in adolescents.

I know the reason of their drinking.

They need to overcome sleeping when they should study at night.

The adult who want to earn money sell harmful drinks to them with low price.

Capitalism let us human conscience and values.

°­»ç´ÔÀÇ Ã·»è±³Á¤ ³»¿ë

Hi, Ms. Lily!
I think that is one effect of capitalism. They no longer value the wellness of their customers especially if they are selling food products. I understand them but I don't agree with their practices. With the high level of competition among sellers, I guess they are prompt to do such a thing.
See you in class.
Aki~

I very often see that teenagers drink caffeinated drinks in the street and stores.
>>> I often see teenagers drink caffeinated drinks on the street and in stores.

I am one of those people who concerned about caffeninated drinks in adolescents.
>>> I am one of those people who is concerned about caffeinated drinks in adolescents.

I know the reason of their drinking.
>>> I know the reason for their drinking.

They need to overcome sleeping when they should study at night.
>>> CORRECT!

The adult who want to earn money sell harmful drinks to them with low price.
>>> Adults who want to earn money sell harmful drinks to them at a low price

Capitalism let us human conscience and values.
>>> Capitalism lets us have human conscience and values.

¹øÈ£ Á¦¸ñ ±Û¾´ÀÌ °ø°³ »óÅ µî·ÏÀÏ Á¶È¸¼ö
130009 Homework JA*UNG CHUNG ¿Ï·á 2023-08-07 2309
130008 Do you ever leave a tip at a restaurant? How much? Á¶*Áö ¿Ï·á 2023-08-07 1
130007 What kind of love is the best love? ÀÌ*¹Î ¿Ï·á 2023-08-07 1430
130006 8/7 °í*Áø ¿Ï·á 2023-08-07 9
130005 Can you describe your hometown in one sentence? ÀÓ*È£ ¿Ï·á 2023-08-07 0
130004 Homework Á¤*Çõ ¿Ï·á 2023-08-07 2426
130003 The best thing in the beach ÃÖ*ȯ ¿Ï·á 2023-08-07 1915
130002 7.25.Tue Ȳ*¹Î ¿Ï·á 2023-08-07 3168
130001 7.24.mon Ȳ*¹Î ¿Ï·á 2023-08-07 2612
130000 7.21.Fri Ȳ*¹Î ¿Ï·á 2023-08-07 1756
129999 7.20.Thu Ȳ*¹Î ¿Ï·á 2023-08-07 1682
129998 7.19.wed Ȳ*¹Î ¿Ï·á 2023-08-06 2489
129997 How do you spice up your weekends? º¹*ÈÆ ¿Ï·á 2023-08-06 2
129996 Homework ±è* ¿Ï·á 2023-08-06 0
129995 Why do you think younger people are more susceptible to call... Ȳ*ÇÏ ¿Ï·á 2023-08-06 2985
129994 What are some situations that make you feel stressful? ¾ö*ÁÖ ¿Ï·á 2023-08-06 2029
129993 homework Àå*¼® ¿Ï·á 2023-08-06 2474
129992 Homework Á¶*ÁØ ¿Ï·á 2023-08-06 1610
129991 Which greeting kind of annoys you? ÀÌ*¾ç ¿Ï·á 2023-08-06 1823
129990 What problems are caused by radioactive pollution? ±è*±¹ ¿Ï·á 2023-08-06 2

HOW TO USE IT?

[¸¶ÀÌÆäÀÌÁö > ¼ö¾÷ ³»¿ë º¸±â > ÇнÀ Ķ¸°´õ > ¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ ¹öÆ° Ŭ¸¯]

¼ö¾÷ Ƚ¼ö¸¸Å­ ¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ °Ô½ÃÆÇÀÌ »ý¼ºµÇ¸ç,
Áö³­ ³¯Â¥¿¡µµ °Ô½Ã ÇÒ ¼ö ÀÖ½À´Ï´Ù.

ÁÖ5ȸ ¼ö¾÷ : ¿ù 20ȸ ÀÌ¿ë °¡´É
ÁÖ3ȸ ¼ö¾÷ : ¿ù 12ȸ ÀÌ¿ë °¡´É
ÁÖ2ȸ ¼ö¾÷ : ¿ù 08ȸ ÀÌ¿ë °¡´É
01
±³Á¤ ³»¿ëÀº ÃÖ´ë 1,000byte±îÁö ¿Ã¸± ¼ö ÀÖ½À´Ï´Ù.

÷ºÎ ÆÄÀÏÀº ¿øÈ°ÇÑ Ã·»èÀ» À§ÇÑ Âü°íÀÚ·á·Î »ç¿ëµÉ »Ó,
ÆÄÀÏ¿¡ ´ëÇÑ Ã·»èÀº ºÒ°¡´É ÇÕ´Ï´Ù.

¾÷·Îµå °¡´ÉÇÑ Ã·ºÎ ÆÄÀÏÀº ÃÖ´ë 2mb±îÁöÀ̸ç,
÷ºÎ ÇÒ ¼ö ÀÖ´Â ÆÄÀÏ Çü½ÄÀº ´ÙÀ½°ú °°½À´Ï´Ù.

¹®¼­ - PDF, TXT, DOCX,
À̹ÌÁö - JPEG, PNG, GIF
02
Àü¹® ºÐ¾ß¸¦ Á¦¿ÜÇÑ È¸¿ø´ÔÀÌ Á÷Á¢ ÀÛ¼ºÇÑ ±Û¸¸
÷»èÀÌ °¡´ÉÇϸç,

¿Ã·ÁÁֽŠ±ÛÀÇ °­»ç´Ô ÷»èÀº 24½Ã°£ À̳»¿¡
¿Ï·á µÇ´Â °ÍÀ» ¿øÄ¢À¸·Î ÇÏ°í ÀÖ½À´Ï´Ù.
03
ÇÏ·ç °Ô½Ã °¡´ÉÇÑ ±ÛÀº 3ȸ±îÁö À̸ç,
Á¾·áµÈ ¼ö¾÷ÀÇ ¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ °Ô½ÃÆÇÀº
ÀÌ¿ëÀÌ ¾î·Á¿î Á¡ ¾çÇØ ºÎŹ µå¸³´Ï´Ù.
04