¹«·á ·¹º§Å×½ºÆ® ¹Þ°í °­»çÆò°¡ ³²±â¸é 1,OOO¿ø ÄíÆù Áï½Ã Àû¸³!

Ȥ½Ã »çÀÌÆ®¿¡¼± ãÁö ¸øÇÑ ±Ã±ÝÇÑ Á¡ÀÌ ÀÖÀ¸¼¼¿ä?
³²°ÜÁֽŠÀ̸ÞÀÏÀ» ÅëÇØ ´äº¯ µå¸®°Ú½À´Ï´Ù.

¹®ÀÇÇϽŠ³»¿ëÀÌ ¹®ÀÚ·Î ¹ß¼ÛµÇ¿À´Ï
¿¬¶ôó¸¦ ³²°ÜÁÖ¼¼¿ä.
¾÷¹«½Ã°£ ¿ù~±Ý ¿ÀÀü9½Ã~¿ÀÈÄ6½Ã
(Á¡½É½Ã°£ ³·12½Ã~¿ÀÈÄ1½Ã)

¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ °Ô½ÃÆÇ

¿µ¾î ¸»Çϱâ¿Í ¾²±â¸¦ µ¿½Ã¿¡ Àâ´Â´Ù!

ÀڽŠÀÖ°Ô ¾µ ¼ö ÀÖ´Â ¿µÀÛ¹®À» À§ÇØ ÆÄ¿öÀ×±Û¸®½¬ ¼ö¾÷À» ¼ö°­ÇϽôÂ
ȸ¿ø´Ôµé²² ¹«·á·Î Á¦°øÇص帮´Â ºÎ°¡ ¼­ºñ½º·Î, Àü¹® ºÐ¾ß¸¦ Á¦¿ÜÇÑ ÀÚÀ¯ ÁÖÁ¦
¶Ç´Â °­»ç´ÔÀÌ ³»Áֽô °úÁ¦¸¦ ȸ¿ø´Ô²²¼­ ¿µ¾î·Î ÀÛ¼ºÇØÁֽøé,
´ã´ç °­»ç ´Ô²²¼­ ¡®¹®¹ý ¿À·ù ±³Á¤¡¯ °ú ¡®´õ ³ªÀº ¿µ¾î½Ä Ç¥Çö¡¯À¸·Î ±³Á¤ÇØÁÖ´Â
¼­ºñ½º ÀÔ´Ï´Ù.

caffeinated drinks

ÀÛ¼ºÀÚ: ±Ç*Èñ
2023-10-05 1916

ȸ¿ø´ÔÀÇ ¿µÀÛ¹®

I very often see that teenagers drink caffeinated drinks in the street and stores.

I am one of those people who concerned about caffeninated drinks in adolescents.

I know the reason of their drinking.

They need to overcome sleeping when they should study at night.

The adult who want to earn money sell harmful drinks to them with low price.

Capitalism let us human conscience and values.

°­»ç´ÔÀÇ Ã·»è±³Á¤ ³»¿ë

Hi, Ms. Lily!
I think that is one effect of capitalism. They no longer value the wellness of their customers especially if they are selling food products. I understand them but I don't agree with their practices. With the high level of competition among sellers, I guess they are prompt to do such a thing.
See you in class.
Aki~

I very often see that teenagers drink caffeinated drinks in the street and stores.
>>> I often see teenagers drink caffeinated drinks on the street and in stores.

I am one of those people who concerned about caffeninated drinks in adolescents.
>>> I am one of those people who is concerned about caffeinated drinks in adolescents.

I know the reason of their drinking.
>>> I know the reason for their drinking.

They need to overcome sleeping when they should study at night.
>>> CORRECT!

The adult who want to earn money sell harmful drinks to them with low price.
>>> Adults who want to earn money sell harmful drinks to them at a low price

Capitalism let us human conscience and values.
>>> Capitalism lets us have human conscience and values.

¹øÈ£ Á¦¸ñ ±Û¾´ÀÌ °ø°³ »óÅ µî·ÏÀÏ Á¶È¸¼ö
135380 Do you believe that first impression lasts? Áø*È£ ¿Ï·á 2024-03-10 3
135379 Homework ±Ç*À± ¿Ï·á 2024-03-10 2
135378 Homework ±è*¿ì ¿Ï·á 2024-03-10 4
135377 homework ¹Ú*Çý ¿Ï·á 2024-03-10 1292
135376 My opinion that governments should encourage pubilc trasportation ±è*¹Î ¿Ï·á 2024-03-10 1772
135375 Page.17 ±è*Áø ¿Ï·á 2024-03-10 5
135374 In your opinion, what would schools be like in the future? ¿À*¼Ò ¿Ï·á 2024-03-10 7
135373 Write about the longest bridge in world and what do you think... ¿À*Çõ ¿Ï·á 2024-03-10 1
135372 Dolharubang ¹Î*Á¤ ¿Ï·á 2024-03-10 1
135371 Nowadays suppressing things. ½Å*È£ ¿Ï·á 2024-03-10 5
135370 Today\'s homework ÀÌ*µµ ¿Ï·á 2024-03-10 1223
135369 What are the best and worst things about being a student? ¹Ú*Àº ¿Ï·á 2024-03-09 1517
135368 Do you think that older people are always right? Why or why not? ½Å*¼· ¿Ï·á 2024-03-09 1342
135367 homework À¯*¸° ¿Ï·á 2024-03-08 1387
135366 Why do other people find it hard to apologize and admit their... ÀÌ*À± ¿Ï·á 2024-03-08 1601
135365 Homework ±è*¼­ ¿Ï·á 2024-03-08 2
135364 homework 03.08 ÃÖ*Ç ¿Ï·á 2024-03-08 1614
135363 Homework Àå*Çõ ¿Ï·á 2024-03-08 1809
135362 What is the importance of kindness in everyday life? ¿¡*¹Ì ¿Ï·á 2024-03-08 2
135361 Homework ±è*¿ø ¿Ï·á 2024-03-08 1426

HOW TO USE IT?

[¸¶ÀÌÆäÀÌÁö > ¼ö¾÷ ³»¿ë º¸±â > ÇнÀ Ķ¸°´õ > ¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ ¹öÆ° Ŭ¸¯]

¼ö¾÷ Ƚ¼ö¸¸Å­ ¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ °Ô½ÃÆÇÀÌ »ý¼ºµÇ¸ç,
Áö³­ ³¯Â¥¿¡µµ °Ô½Ã ÇÒ ¼ö ÀÖ½À´Ï´Ù.

ÁÖ5ȸ ¼ö¾÷ : ¿ù 20ȸ ÀÌ¿ë °¡´É
ÁÖ3ȸ ¼ö¾÷ : ¿ù 12ȸ ÀÌ¿ë °¡´É
ÁÖ2ȸ ¼ö¾÷ : ¿ù 08ȸ ÀÌ¿ë °¡´É
01
±³Á¤ ³»¿ëÀº ÃÖ´ë 1,000byte±îÁö ¿Ã¸± ¼ö ÀÖ½À´Ï´Ù.

÷ºÎ ÆÄÀÏÀº ¿øÈ°ÇÑ Ã·»èÀ» À§ÇÑ Âü°íÀÚ·á·Î »ç¿ëµÉ »Ó,
ÆÄÀÏ¿¡ ´ëÇÑ Ã·»èÀº ºÒ°¡´É ÇÕ´Ï´Ù.

¾÷·Îµå °¡´ÉÇÑ Ã·ºÎ ÆÄÀÏÀº ÃÖ´ë 2mb±îÁöÀ̸ç,
÷ºÎ ÇÒ ¼ö ÀÖ´Â ÆÄÀÏ Çü½ÄÀº ´ÙÀ½°ú °°½À´Ï´Ù.

¹®¼­ - PDF, TXT, DOCX,
À̹ÌÁö - JPEG, PNG, GIF
02
Àü¹® ºÐ¾ß¸¦ Á¦¿ÜÇÑ È¸¿ø´ÔÀÌ Á÷Á¢ ÀÛ¼ºÇÑ ±Û¸¸
÷»èÀÌ °¡´ÉÇϸç,

¿Ã·ÁÁֽŠ±ÛÀÇ °­»ç´Ô ÷»èÀº 24½Ã°£ À̳»¿¡
¿Ï·á µÇ´Â °ÍÀ» ¿øÄ¢À¸·Î ÇÏ°í ÀÖ½À´Ï´Ù.
03
ÇÏ·ç °Ô½Ã °¡´ÉÇÑ ±ÛÀº 3ȸ±îÁö À̸ç,
Á¾·áµÈ ¼ö¾÷ÀÇ ¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ °Ô½ÃÆÇÀº
ÀÌ¿ëÀÌ ¾î·Á¿î Á¡ ¾çÇØ ºÎŹ µå¸³´Ï´Ù.
04