¹«·á ·¹º§Å×½ºÆ® ¹Þ°í °­»çÆò°¡ ³²±â¸é 1,OOO¿ø ÄíÆù Áï½Ã Àû¸³!

Ȥ½Ã »çÀÌÆ®¿¡¼± ãÁö ¸øÇÑ ±Ã±ÝÇÑ Á¡ÀÌ ÀÖÀ¸¼¼¿ä?
³²°ÜÁֽŠÀ̸ÞÀÏÀ» ÅëÇØ ´äº¯ µå¸®°Ú½À´Ï´Ù.

¹®ÀÇÇϽŠ³»¿ëÀÌ ¹®ÀÚ·Î ¹ß¼ÛµÇ¿À´Ï
¿¬¶ôó¸¦ ³²°ÜÁÖ¼¼¿ä.
¾÷¹«½Ã°£ ¿ù~±Ý ¿ÀÀü9½Ã~¿ÀÈÄ6½Ã
(Á¡½É½Ã°£ ³·12½Ã~¿ÀÈÄ1½Ã)

¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ °Ô½ÃÆÇ

¿µ¾î ¸»Çϱâ¿Í ¾²±â¸¦ µ¿½Ã¿¡ Àâ´Â´Ù!

ÀڽŠÀÖ°Ô ¾µ ¼ö ÀÖ´Â ¿µÀÛ¹®À» À§ÇØ ÆÄ¿öÀ×±Û¸®½¬ ¼ö¾÷À» ¼ö°­ÇϽôÂ
ȸ¿ø´Ôµé²² ¹«·á·Î Á¦°øÇص帮´Â ºÎ°¡ ¼­ºñ½º·Î, Àü¹® ºÐ¾ß¸¦ Á¦¿ÜÇÑ ÀÚÀ¯ ÁÖÁ¦
¶Ç´Â °­»ç´ÔÀÌ ³»Áֽô °úÁ¦¸¦ ȸ¿ø´Ô²²¼­ ¿µ¾î·Î ÀÛ¼ºÇØÁֽøé,
´ã´ç °­»ç ´Ô²²¼­ ¡®¹®¹ý ¿À·ù ±³Á¤¡¯ °ú ¡®´õ ³ªÀº ¿µ¾î½Ä Ç¥Çö¡¯À¸·Î ±³Á¤ÇØÁÖ´Â
¼­ºñ½º ÀÔ´Ï´Ù.

caffeinated drinks

ÀÛ¼ºÀÚ: ±Ç*Èñ
2023-10-05 2178

ȸ¿ø´ÔÀÇ ¿µÀÛ¹®

I very often see that teenagers drink caffeinated drinks in the street and stores.

I am one of those people who concerned about caffeninated drinks in adolescents.

I know the reason of their drinking.

They need to overcome sleeping when they should study at night.

The adult who want to earn money sell harmful drinks to them with low price.

Capitalism let us human conscience and values.

°­»ç´ÔÀÇ Ã·»è±³Á¤ ³»¿ë

Hi, Ms. Lily!
I think that is one effect of capitalism. They no longer value the wellness of their customers especially if they are selling food products. I understand them but I don't agree with their practices. With the high level of competition among sellers, I guess they are prompt to do such a thing.
See you in class.
Aki~

I very often see that teenagers drink caffeinated drinks in the street and stores.
>>> I often see teenagers drink caffeinated drinks on the street and in stores.

I am one of those people who concerned about caffeninated drinks in adolescents.
>>> I am one of those people who is concerned about caffeinated drinks in adolescents.

I know the reason of their drinking.
>>> I know the reason for their drinking.

They need to overcome sleeping when they should study at night.
>>> CORRECT!

The adult who want to earn money sell harmful drinks to them with low price.
>>> Adults who want to earn money sell harmful drinks to them at a low price

Capitalism let us human conscience and values.
>>> Capitalism lets us have human conscience and values.

¹øÈ£ Á¦¸ñ ±Û¾´ÀÌ °ø°³ »óÅ µî·ÏÀÏ Á¶È¸¼ö
137570 HOMEWORK FOR 06.03.2024 WRITING TASK: What are some creative... ÀÓ*Áö ¿Ï·á 2024-06-03 4
137569 Homework ±è*´Ô ¿Ï·á 2024-06-03 1328
137568 Page.38 ±è*Áø ¿Ï·á 2024-06-03 4
137567 important ¹Î*Á¤ ¿Ï·á 2024-06-02 1
137566 >> What do you think is the most useful gadget to a student?... ÀÌ*¹Î ¿Ï·á 2024-06-02 0
137565 Today\'s homework ÀÌ*µµ ¿Ï·á 2024-06-02 1202
137564 Today\'s homework ÀÌ*µµ ¿Ï·á 2024-06-02 982
137563 Today\'s homework ÀÌ*µµ ¿Ï·á 2024-06-02 1001
137562 Homework ±è*¿ì ¿Ï·á 2024-06-02 1
137561 HOMEWORK ÁÖ*¹Î ¿Ï·á 2024-06-02 1601
137560 Technology ±è*¹Î ¿Ï·á 2024-06-01 901
137559 Hello ±è*¹Î ¿Ï·á 2024-06-01 1101
137558 Fun ±è*¹Î ¿Ï·á 2024-06-01 1278
137557 Laugh ±è*¹Î ¿Ï·á 2024-06-01 1129
137556 Homework Á¤*ȯ ¿Ï·á 2024-06-01 1472
137555 2024.06.01 ¼÷Á¦ ¾ç*À² ¿Ï·á 2024-06-01 0
137554 What is weather my country each season? ½Å*È£ ¿Ï·á 2024-06-01 3
137553 Do you think parents who adopt have the same kind of love for... ÀÌ*À± ¿Ï·á 2024-06-01 1636
137552 When was the last time you went to a good restaurant? What did... ±è*¼ø ¿Ï·á 2024-05-31 1659
137551 homework 05.31 ÃÖ*Ç ¿Ï·á 2024-05-31 963

HOW TO USE IT?

[¸¶ÀÌÆäÀÌÁö > ¼ö¾÷ ³»¿ë º¸±â > ÇнÀ Ķ¸°´õ > ¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ ¹öÆ° Ŭ¸¯]

¼ö¾÷ Ƚ¼ö¸¸Å­ ¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ °Ô½ÃÆÇÀÌ »ý¼ºµÇ¸ç,
Áö³­ ³¯Â¥¿¡µµ °Ô½Ã ÇÒ ¼ö ÀÖ½À´Ï´Ù.

ÁÖ5ȸ ¼ö¾÷ : ¿ù 20ȸ ÀÌ¿ë °¡´É
ÁÖ3ȸ ¼ö¾÷ : ¿ù 12ȸ ÀÌ¿ë °¡´É
ÁÖ2ȸ ¼ö¾÷ : ¿ù 08ȸ ÀÌ¿ë °¡´É
01
±³Á¤ ³»¿ëÀº ÃÖ´ë 1,000byte±îÁö ¿Ã¸± ¼ö ÀÖ½À´Ï´Ù.

÷ºÎ ÆÄÀÏÀº ¿øÈ°ÇÑ Ã·»èÀ» À§ÇÑ Âü°íÀÚ·á·Î »ç¿ëµÉ »Ó,
ÆÄÀÏ¿¡ ´ëÇÑ Ã·»èÀº ºÒ°¡´É ÇÕ´Ï´Ù.

¾÷·Îµå °¡´ÉÇÑ Ã·ºÎ ÆÄÀÏÀº ÃÖ´ë 2mb±îÁöÀ̸ç,
÷ºÎ ÇÒ ¼ö ÀÖ´Â ÆÄÀÏ Çü½ÄÀº ´ÙÀ½°ú °°½À´Ï´Ù.

¹®¼­ - PDF, TXT, DOCX,
À̹ÌÁö - JPEG, PNG, GIF
02
Àü¹® ºÐ¾ß¸¦ Á¦¿ÜÇÑ È¸¿ø´ÔÀÌ Á÷Á¢ ÀÛ¼ºÇÑ ±Û¸¸
÷»èÀÌ °¡´ÉÇϸç,

¿Ã·ÁÁֽŠ±ÛÀÇ °­»ç´Ô ÷»èÀº 24½Ã°£ À̳»¿¡
¿Ï·á µÇ´Â °ÍÀ» ¿øÄ¢À¸·Î ÇÏ°í ÀÖ½À´Ï´Ù.
03
ÇÏ·ç °Ô½Ã °¡´ÉÇÑ ±ÛÀº 3ȸ±îÁö À̸ç,
Á¾·áµÈ ¼ö¾÷ÀÇ ¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ °Ô½ÃÆÇÀº
ÀÌ¿ëÀÌ ¾î·Á¿î Á¡ ¾çÇØ ºÎŹ µå¸³´Ï´Ù.
04