¹«·á ·¹º§Å×½ºÆ® ¹Þ°í °­»çÆò°¡ ³²±â¸é 1,OOO¿ø ÄíÆù Áï½Ã Àû¸³!

Ȥ½Ã »çÀÌÆ®¿¡¼± ãÁö ¸øÇÑ ±Ã±ÝÇÑ Á¡ÀÌ ÀÖÀ¸¼¼¿ä?
³²°ÜÁֽŠÀ̸ÞÀÏÀ» ÅëÇØ ´äº¯ µå¸®°Ú½À´Ï´Ù.

¹®ÀÇÇϽŠ³»¿ëÀÌ ¹®ÀÚ·Î ¹ß¼ÛµÇ¿À´Ï
¿¬¶ôó¸¦ ³²°ÜÁÖ¼¼¿ä.
¾÷¹«½Ã°£ ¿ù~±Ý ¿ÀÀü9½Ã~¿ÀÈÄ6½Ã
(Á¡½É½Ã°£ ³·12½Ã~¿ÀÈÄ1½Ã)

¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ °Ô½ÃÆÇ

¿µ¾î ¸»Çϱâ¿Í ¾²±â¸¦ µ¿½Ã¿¡ Àâ´Â´Ù!

ÀڽŠÀÖ°Ô ¾µ ¼ö ÀÖ´Â ¿µÀÛ¹®À» À§ÇØ ÆÄ¿öÀ×±Û¸®½¬ ¼ö¾÷À» ¼ö°­ÇϽôÂ
ȸ¿ø´Ôµé²² ¹«·á·Î Á¦°øÇص帮´Â ºÎ°¡ ¼­ºñ½º·Î, Àü¹® ºÐ¾ß¸¦ Á¦¿ÜÇÑ ÀÚÀ¯ ÁÖÁ¦
¶Ç´Â °­»ç´ÔÀÌ ³»Áֽô °úÁ¦¸¦ ȸ¿ø´Ô²²¼­ ¿µ¾î·Î ÀÛ¼ºÇØÁֽøé,
´ã´ç °­»ç ´Ô²²¼­ ¡®¹®¹ý ¿À·ù ±³Á¤¡¯ °ú ¡®´õ ³ªÀº ¿µ¾î½Ä Ç¥Çö¡¯À¸·Î ±³Á¤ÇØÁÖ´Â
¼­ºñ½º ÀÔ´Ï´Ù.

today\'s homework

ÀÛ¼ºÀÚ: ÀÌ*µµ
2023-10-03 757

ȸ¿ø´ÔÀÇ ¿µÀÛ¹®

ESSAY: As the number of cars increases, more money has to be spent on road systems. Some people think the government should pay for this. Others, however, think that drivers should cover the costs. Discuss both views and give your opinion.

Some people say that road systems should be pay by goverment. They require better systems and increasing traffical industry. and believe these are helpful country's success. But another people scold them. they say that spending money for road are foolish thinking. Also, they agree with other argument that car industry helps our life. But it isn't reationship with car and road. They just think road are method to connect city and city. They think that it don't mean. So, they think that waste thier money.
I think that road systems are needed. these are quiet important. If we don't fix road, our industry will be freeze. The flow will not be correct. At result our country will go bankrup.
We always search better road system.

°­»ç´ÔÀÇ Ã·»è±³Á¤ ³»¿ë

Hi there Lee! Wow! I was surprised with your essay. It's a bit longer this time. Keep it up. 
>>> TEACHER GEMMA
Some people say that road systems should be pay by goverment. 
>>> Some people say that road systems should be paid by the government
They require better systems and increase traffic industry.
>>> CORRECT
 and believe these are helpful country's success. 
>>> And they believe these could be helpful to the country's success. 
But another people scold them. they say that spending money for road are foolish thinking. 
>>But another people scold them. They say that spending money for road are foolish ideas. 
Also, they agree with other argument that car industry helps our life. 
>>> CORRECT
But it isn't reationship with car and road. 
>>> But it is not related to cars and roads. 
They just think road are method to connect city and city. 
>>> They just think that highways are just for connecting cities. 
They think that it don't mean.
>>> They don't think it's meaningful. 
 So, they think that waste thier money.
>>> So, they think it's a waste of money.
I think that road systems are needed.
>>> CORRECT
OR>>I think that road systems are necessary.
These are quiet important. 
>>> CORRECT
If we don't fix road, our industry will be freeze. 
>>> If we won't fix our roads, our industry will be frozen. 
The flow will not be corrected. 
>>> CORRECT
At result our country will go bankrupt.
>>> As a result, our country will go bankrupt.
We always search better road system.
>>> We always search for better road system.
¹øÈ£ Á¦¸ñ ±Û¾´ÀÌ °ø°³ »óÅ µî·ÏÀÏ Á¶È¸¼ö
131920 Do you think that your country has a strong military force and... ÀÌ*ÁÖ ¿Ï·á 2023-10-25 1
131919 Homework ±è*¿ì ¿Ï·á 2023-10-25 625
131918 HOMEWORK: Please write a short paragraph about ¡°Are you afraid... ¾Ù* ¿Ï·á 2023-10-25 1
131917 Homework Á¤*ȯ ¿Ï·á 2023-10-25 752
131916 Homework ·ù*¿ì ¿Ï·á 2023-10-25 868
131915 homework ¾È*¿¬ ¿Ï·á 2023-10-25 912
131914 How happy are you with your English level? How do you describe... ±è*¼ø ¿Ï·á 2023-10-25 956
131913 Who are the world¡¯s biggest war criminals? Write about one... ÀÌ*¿ì ¿Ï·á 2023-10-25 988
131912 WRITING TASK: Describe the last picnic you had. What was it like? ÀÓ*Áö ¿Ï·á 2023-10-25 3
131911 homework_231024 ÇÑ*·Ï ¿Ï·á 2023-10-25 1040
131910 Homework - \'How to overcome difficult times.\' ÀÌ*ÁÖ ¿Ï·á 2023-10-25 915
131909 Do you want to work in a medical field someday? Why or why not? ÀÌ*ÅÂ ¿Ï·á 2023-10-25 1092
131908 Do you believe in lifelong learning? Why or why not? ÀÌ*ÅÂ ¿Ï·á 2023-10-25 1067
131907 homework ±è*¸° ¿Ï·á 2023-10-25 1
131906 The death of someone special ¾ç*¿¬ ¿Ï·á 2023-10-25 939
131905 \"Is it important to consider other people\'s opinions? Why or... ÀÌ*ÅÂ ¿Ï·á 2023-10-25 1088
131904 is it easy to handle a dilemma? Why or why not? ÀÌ*ÅÂ ¿Ï·á 2023-10-25 699
131903 Homework ¾È*¼÷ ¿Ï·á 2023-10-25 1195
131902 Letter ±Ç*Á¤ ¿Ï·á 2023-10-25 1
131901 Homework ½Å*È­ ¿Ï·á 2023-10-25 866

HOW TO USE IT?

[¸¶ÀÌÆäÀÌÁö > ¼ö¾÷ ³»¿ë º¸±â > ÇнÀ Ķ¸°´õ > ¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ ¹öÆ° Ŭ¸¯]

¼ö¾÷ Ƚ¼ö¸¸Å­ ¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ °Ô½ÃÆÇÀÌ »ý¼ºµÇ¸ç,
Áö³­ ³¯Â¥¿¡µµ °Ô½Ã ÇÒ ¼ö ÀÖ½À´Ï´Ù.

ÁÖ5ȸ ¼ö¾÷ : ¿ù 20ȸ ÀÌ¿ë °¡´É
ÁÖ3ȸ ¼ö¾÷ : ¿ù 12ȸ ÀÌ¿ë °¡´É
ÁÖ2ȸ ¼ö¾÷ : ¿ù 08ȸ ÀÌ¿ë °¡´É
01
±³Á¤ ³»¿ëÀº ÃÖ´ë 1,000byte±îÁö ¿Ã¸± ¼ö ÀÖ½À´Ï´Ù.

÷ºÎ ÆÄÀÏÀº ¿øÈ°ÇÑ Ã·»èÀ» À§ÇÑ Âü°íÀÚ·á·Î »ç¿ëµÉ »Ó,
ÆÄÀÏ¿¡ ´ëÇÑ Ã·»èÀº ºÒ°¡´É ÇÕ´Ï´Ù.

¾÷·Îµå °¡´ÉÇÑ Ã·ºÎ ÆÄÀÏÀº ÃÖ´ë 2mb±îÁöÀ̸ç,
÷ºÎ ÇÒ ¼ö ÀÖ´Â ÆÄÀÏ Çü½ÄÀº ´ÙÀ½°ú °°½À´Ï´Ù.

¹®¼­ - PDF, TXT, DOCX,
À̹ÌÁö - JPEG, PNG, GIF
02
Àü¹® ºÐ¾ß¸¦ Á¦¿ÜÇÑ È¸¿ø´ÔÀÌ Á÷Á¢ ÀÛ¼ºÇÑ ±Û¸¸
÷»èÀÌ °¡´ÉÇϸç,

¿Ã·ÁÁֽŠ±ÛÀÇ °­»ç´Ô ÷»èÀº 24½Ã°£ À̳»¿¡
¿Ï·á µÇ´Â °ÍÀ» ¿øÄ¢À¸·Î ÇÏ°í ÀÖ½À´Ï´Ù.
03
ÇÏ·ç °Ô½Ã °¡´ÉÇÑ ±ÛÀº 3ȸ±îÁö À̸ç,
Á¾·áµÈ ¼ö¾÷ÀÇ ¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ °Ô½ÃÆÇÀº
ÀÌ¿ëÀÌ ¾î·Á¿î Á¡ ¾çÇØ ºÎŹ µå¸³´Ï´Ù.
04