¹«·á ·¹º§Å×½ºÆ® ¹Þ°í °­»çÆò°¡ ³²±â¸é 1,OOO¿ø ÄíÆù Áï½Ã Àû¸³!

Ȥ½Ã »çÀÌÆ®¿¡¼± ãÁö ¸øÇÑ ±Ã±ÝÇÑ Á¡ÀÌ ÀÖÀ¸¼¼¿ä?
³²°ÜÁֽŠÀ̸ÞÀÏÀ» ÅëÇØ ´äº¯ µå¸®°Ú½À´Ï´Ù.

¹®ÀÇÇϽŠ³»¿ëÀÌ ¹®ÀÚ·Î ¹ß¼ÛµÇ¿À´Ï
¿¬¶ôó¸¦ ³²°ÜÁÖ¼¼¿ä.
¾÷¹«½Ã°£ ¿ù~±Ý ¿ÀÀü9½Ã~¿ÀÈÄ6½Ã
(Á¡½É½Ã°£ ³·12½Ã~¿ÀÈÄ1½Ã)

¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ °Ô½ÃÆÇ

¿µ¾î ¸»Çϱâ¿Í ¾²±â¸¦ µ¿½Ã¿¡ Àâ´Â´Ù!

ÀڽŠÀÖ°Ô ¾µ ¼ö ÀÖ´Â ¿µÀÛ¹®À» À§ÇØ ÆÄ¿öÀ×±Û¸®½¬ ¼ö¾÷À» ¼ö°­ÇϽôÂ
ȸ¿ø´Ôµé²² ¹«·á·Î Á¦°øÇص帮´Â ºÎ°¡ ¼­ºñ½º·Î, Àü¹® ºÐ¾ß¸¦ Á¦¿ÜÇÑ ÀÚÀ¯ ÁÖÁ¦
¶Ç´Â °­»ç´ÔÀÌ ³»Áֽô °úÁ¦¸¦ ȸ¿ø´Ô²²¼­ ¿µ¾î·Î ÀÛ¼ºÇØÁֽøé,
´ã´ç °­»ç ´Ô²²¼­ ¡®¹®¹ý ¿À·ù ±³Á¤¡¯ °ú ¡®´õ ³ªÀº ¿µ¾î½Ä Ç¥Çö¡¯À¸·Î ±³Á¤ÇØÁÖ´Â
¼­ºñ½º ÀÔ´Ï´Ù.

homework

ÀÛ¼ºÀÚ: Á¤*ȯ
2023-10-02 1079

ȸ¿ø´ÔÀÇ ¿µÀÛ¹®

I can not say exactly when and what my favorite holiday is..
Anyway I really enjoy spending my all of time alone in coffee shop.
That is my great and favorite holiday even though it is just a day.
I usually talk too much with customers and serve them.
So I need time to recharge myself in coffee shop during the holiday.

And there are many logo contests everyday.
I like making ideas and drawing logoes for the contests.
Finally I join it and submitt the logo.
I got win three times .

I like to have my time alone and draw logoes.
That is my favorite holiday.

°­»ç´ÔÀÇ Ã·»è±³Á¤ ³»¿ë

Hello, Han!
Thank you for writing. Reading your composition is really interesting as it talks sincerely about you. It's nice to know that you have that kind of hobby to recharge yourself after your busy days at work. And people need to find the activities that they would love doing to balance work and life. Have a great one!~
-Chammy
I can not say exactly when and what my favorite holiday is..
>>I cannot say exactly when and what my favorite holiday is...
Anyway I really enjoy spending my all of time alone in coffee shop.

>> Anyway, I really enjoy spending all of my time alone in a coffee shop.

That is my great and favorite holiday even though it is just a day.
>>Correct
I usually talk too much with customers and serve them.
>>Correct
So I need time to recharge myself in coffee shop during the holiday.
>> So I need time to recharge myself in a coffee shop during the holiday.
And there are many logo contests everyday.

>>And there are many logo contests every day

I like making ideas and drawing logoes for the contests.
>> I like making ideas and drawing logos for the contests.

Finally I join it and submitt the logo.

>> Finally, I joined and submitted the logo.

I got win three times .
>> I won three times
I like to have my time alone and draw logoes.

>> I like to have my time alone and draw logos.

That is my favorite holiday.
>>Correct
¹øÈ£ Á¦¸ñ ±Û¾´ÀÌ °ø°³ »óÅ µî·ÏÀÏ Á¶È¸¼ö
130132 How to keep a friend ÀÌ*ÅÂ ¿Ï·á 2023-08-11 2911
130131 How do I value my friends ÀÌ*ÅÂ ¿Ï·á 2023-08-11 1734
130130 Homework ½Å*È­ ¿Ï·á 2023-08-11 1388
130129 Bertrand Russell said: \"War does not determine who is right -... ±è*¹Î ¿Ï·á 2023-08-11 2
130128 Is life a good adventure? ±Ç*Áø ¿Ï·á 2023-08-10 0
130127 Homework ¼Û*ÁØ ¿Ï·á 2023-08-10 1710
130126 Which country, aside from your country has the best food? º¹*ÈÆ ¿Ï·á 2023-08-10 1
130125 homework ±è*¿¬ ¿Ï·á 2023-08-10 2773
130124 homework 08.10 ÃÖ*Ç ¿Ï·á 2023-08-10 2247
130123 How do you encourage yourself to keep going in hard times? ±Ç*Áø ¿Ï·á 2023-08-10 0
130122 Homework ±è*¿ì ¿Ï·á 2023-08-10 1670
130121 Are there any special occasions or anniversaries you think... ±Ç*Áø ¿Ï·á 2023-08-10 0
130120 How would your friends describe you? ¹Ú*Çö ¿Ï·á 2023-08-10 2069
130119 Do you care what a restaurant looks like, or is the food the... Á¶*Áö ¿Ï·á 2023-08-10 1
130118 Technology changes a lot ±è*¿ì ¿Ï·á 2023-08-10 0
130117 What is your least favorite? Why? ¿À*Çõ ¿Ï·á 2023-08-10 2
130116 Homework ÁÖ*¿¬ ¿Ï·á 2023-08-10 2624
130115 Homework ·ù*¿ì ¿Ï·á 2023-08-10 1874
130114 What do you think is best to mention about your introduction?... ¹Ú*¾Æ ¿Ï·á 2023-08-10 2424
130113 Self Introduction ¹Ú*¾Æ ¿Ï·á 2023-08-10 1688

HOW TO USE IT?

[¸¶ÀÌÆäÀÌÁö > ¼ö¾÷ ³»¿ë º¸±â > ÇнÀ Ķ¸°´õ > ¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ ¹öÆ° Ŭ¸¯]

¼ö¾÷ Ƚ¼ö¸¸Å­ ¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ °Ô½ÃÆÇÀÌ »ý¼ºµÇ¸ç,
Áö³­ ³¯Â¥¿¡µµ °Ô½Ã ÇÒ ¼ö ÀÖ½À´Ï´Ù.

ÁÖ5ȸ ¼ö¾÷ : ¿ù 20ȸ ÀÌ¿ë °¡´É
ÁÖ3ȸ ¼ö¾÷ : ¿ù 12ȸ ÀÌ¿ë °¡´É
ÁÖ2ȸ ¼ö¾÷ : ¿ù 08ȸ ÀÌ¿ë °¡´É
01
±³Á¤ ³»¿ëÀº ÃÖ´ë 1,000byte±îÁö ¿Ã¸± ¼ö ÀÖ½À´Ï´Ù.

÷ºÎ ÆÄÀÏÀº ¿øÈ°ÇÑ Ã·»èÀ» À§ÇÑ Âü°íÀÚ·á·Î »ç¿ëµÉ »Ó,
ÆÄÀÏ¿¡ ´ëÇÑ Ã·»èÀº ºÒ°¡´É ÇÕ´Ï´Ù.

¾÷·Îµå °¡´ÉÇÑ Ã·ºÎ ÆÄÀÏÀº ÃÖ´ë 2mb±îÁöÀ̸ç,
÷ºÎ ÇÒ ¼ö ÀÖ´Â ÆÄÀÏ Çü½ÄÀº ´ÙÀ½°ú °°½À´Ï´Ù.

¹®¼­ - PDF, TXT, DOCX,
À̹ÌÁö - JPEG, PNG, GIF
02
Àü¹® ºÐ¾ß¸¦ Á¦¿ÜÇÑ È¸¿ø´ÔÀÌ Á÷Á¢ ÀÛ¼ºÇÑ ±Û¸¸
÷»èÀÌ °¡´ÉÇϸç,

¿Ã·ÁÁֽŠ±ÛÀÇ °­»ç´Ô ÷»èÀº 24½Ã°£ À̳»¿¡
¿Ï·á µÇ´Â °ÍÀ» ¿øÄ¢À¸·Î ÇÏ°í ÀÖ½À´Ï´Ù.
03
ÇÏ·ç °Ô½Ã °¡´ÉÇÑ ±ÛÀº 3ȸ±îÁö À̸ç,
Á¾·áµÈ ¼ö¾÷ÀÇ ¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ °Ô½ÃÆÇÀº
ÀÌ¿ëÀÌ ¾î·Á¿î Á¡ ¾çÇØ ºÎŹ µå¸³´Ï´Ù.
04