¹«·á ·¹º§Å×½ºÆ® ¹Þ°í °­»çÆò°¡ ³²±â¸é 1,OOO¿ø ÄíÆù Áï½Ã Àû¸³!

Ȥ½Ã »çÀÌÆ®¿¡¼± ãÁö ¸øÇÑ ±Ã±ÝÇÑ Á¡ÀÌ ÀÖÀ¸¼¼¿ä?
³²°ÜÁֽŠÀ̸ÞÀÏÀ» ÅëÇØ ´äº¯ µå¸®°Ú½À´Ï´Ù.

¹®ÀÇÇϽŠ³»¿ëÀÌ ¹®ÀÚ·Î ¹ß¼ÛµÇ¿À´Ï
¿¬¶ôó¸¦ ³²°ÜÁÖ¼¼¿ä.
¾÷¹«½Ã°£ ¿ù~±Ý ¿ÀÀü9½Ã~¿ÀÈÄ6½Ã
(Á¡½É½Ã°£ ³·12½Ã~¿ÀÈÄ1½Ã)

¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ °Ô½ÃÆÇ

¿µ¾î ¸»Çϱâ¿Í ¾²±â¸¦ µ¿½Ã¿¡ Àâ´Â´Ù!

ÀڽŠÀÖ°Ô ¾µ ¼ö ÀÖ´Â ¿µÀÛ¹®À» À§ÇØ ÆÄ¿öÀ×±Û¸®½¬ ¼ö¾÷À» ¼ö°­ÇϽôÂ
ȸ¿ø´Ôµé²² ¹«·á·Î Á¦°øÇص帮´Â ºÎ°¡ ¼­ºñ½º·Î, Àü¹® ºÐ¾ß¸¦ Á¦¿ÜÇÑ ÀÚÀ¯ ÁÖÁ¦
¶Ç´Â °­»ç´ÔÀÌ ³»Áֽô °úÁ¦¸¦ ȸ¿ø´Ô²²¼­ ¿µ¾î·Î ÀÛ¼ºÇØÁֽøé,
´ã´ç °­»ç ´Ô²²¼­ ¡®¹®¹ý ¿À·ù ±³Á¤¡¯ °ú ¡®´õ ³ªÀº ¿µ¾î½Ä Ç¥Çö¡¯À¸·Î ±³Á¤ÇØÁÖ´Â
¼­ºñ½º ÀÔ´Ï´Ù.

homework 09.27

ÀÛ¼ºÀÚ: ÃÖ*Ç
2023-09-27 1439

ȸ¿ø´ÔÀÇ ¿µÀÛ¹®

~ Writing Task:
Please answer the question:
Why do some people think that holidays are a bit stressful? What are the possible reasons?

The reason why we wait for holidays is the rest.
But, some holidays are rather stressful.
One of them is when we meet families get together.
Sometimes I watched TV show about other families stories.
I think there are many rude people in the world.
According to the TV show, the are ask the sensitive questions to other family member.
And even them, they are did steal from their visit homes.
So, some people don't want meet their family members.
Because they don't want get stressed.

°­»ç´ÔÀÇ Ã·»è±³Á¤ ³»¿ë

Good day, Keon!
Thank you so much for taking time in answering the question. Your ideas and opinions are on point. Keep it up! :)
~ T. Camille


~ Writing Task:
Please answer the question:
Why do some people think that holidays are a bit stressful? What are the possible reasons?


The reason why we wait for holidays is the rest.
>> The reason why we wait for holidays is because we want to have our rest time.
But, some holidays are rather stressful.
>> CORRECT!
One of them is when we meet families get together.
>> One of them is when we meet families and have a get-together.
OR >> One of them is when we  have a family get-together.
Sometimes I watched TV show about other families stories.
>> Sometimes I watch TV shows about other families' stories.
I think there are many rude people in the world.
>> CORRECT!
According to the TV show, the are ask the sensitive questions to other family member.
>> According to the TV show, the ask sensitive questions to other family members.
And even them, they are did steal from their visit homes.
>> And even them, they did steal something from the homes they visit.
So, some people don't want meet their family members.
>> So, some people don't want to meet their family members.
Because they don't want get stressed.
>> It's because they don't want to get stressed.
¹øÈ£ Á¦¸ñ ±Û¾´ÀÌ °ø°³ »óÅ µî·ÏÀÏ Á¶È¸¼ö
133626 What are your 2024 wishes? ¹®*Çö ¿Ï·á 2024-01-03 1411
133625 Homework Àå*Çõ ¿Ï·á 2024-01-03 1017
133624 homework ±è*¿¬ ¿Ï·á 2024-01-03 1262
133623 Homework Àå*Çõ ¿Ï·á 2024-01-03 910
133622 homework 01.03 ÃÖ*Ç ¿Ï·á 2024-01-03 1345
133621 Today\'s homework ÀÌ*µµ ¿Ï·á 2024-01-03 690
133620 Homework °ø*¿ì ¿Ï·á 2024-01-03 1668
133619 Would you rather take an afternoon nap or spend all afternoon... ¼Û*¿ì ¿Ï·á 2024-01-03 775
133618 Homework ±è*¿ì ¿Ï·á 2024-01-03 296
133617 homework ÀÌ*¼÷ ¿Ï·á 2024-01-03 2092
133616 Why do you think some people like collecting old stuff such as... ÇÏ*Çö ¿Ï·á 2024-01-03 1
133615 Bad day ÀÌ*±Ô ¿Ï·á 2024-01-03 1844
133614 Homework ±è*¼­ ¿Ï·á 2024-01-03 2
133613 24/01/03 Home work ÀÌ*¹Î ¿Ï·á 2024-01-03 1
133612 How important is family connection and relations in your country? ÃÖ*Á¤ ¿Ï·á 2024-01-03 2096
133611 What would you do if you were late for an important class? ÀÓ*È£ ¿Ï·á 2024-01-03 0
133610 which one would you like to achieve? ±Ç*¸ð ¿Ï·á 2024-01-03 1404
133609 How can we keep children safe from cyberbullying online? ¿¡*¹Ì ¿Ï·á 2024-01-03 1
133608 HOMEWORK: Please write a short paragraph about \"Would you still... ¾Ù* ¿Ï·á 2024-01-03 2
133607 WRITING TASK: Do you think it is healthy to have snacks every... ÀÓ*Áö ¿Ï·á 2024-01-03 3

HOW TO USE IT?

[¸¶ÀÌÆäÀÌÁö > ¼ö¾÷ ³»¿ë º¸±â > ÇнÀ Ķ¸°´õ > ¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ ¹öÆ° Ŭ¸¯]

¼ö¾÷ Ƚ¼ö¸¸Å­ ¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ °Ô½ÃÆÇÀÌ »ý¼ºµÇ¸ç,
Áö³­ ³¯Â¥¿¡µµ °Ô½Ã ÇÒ ¼ö ÀÖ½À´Ï´Ù.

ÁÖ5ȸ ¼ö¾÷ : ¿ù 20ȸ ÀÌ¿ë °¡´É
ÁÖ3ȸ ¼ö¾÷ : ¿ù 12ȸ ÀÌ¿ë °¡´É
ÁÖ2ȸ ¼ö¾÷ : ¿ù 08ȸ ÀÌ¿ë °¡´É
01
±³Á¤ ³»¿ëÀº ÃÖ´ë 1,000byte±îÁö ¿Ã¸± ¼ö ÀÖ½À´Ï´Ù.

÷ºÎ ÆÄÀÏÀº ¿øÈ°ÇÑ Ã·»èÀ» À§ÇÑ Âü°íÀÚ·á·Î »ç¿ëµÉ »Ó,
ÆÄÀÏ¿¡ ´ëÇÑ Ã·»èÀº ºÒ°¡´É ÇÕ´Ï´Ù.

¾÷·Îµå °¡´ÉÇÑ Ã·ºÎ ÆÄÀÏÀº ÃÖ´ë 2mb±îÁöÀ̸ç,
÷ºÎ ÇÒ ¼ö ÀÖ´Â ÆÄÀÏ Çü½ÄÀº ´ÙÀ½°ú °°½À´Ï´Ù.

¹®¼­ - PDF, TXT, DOCX,
À̹ÌÁö - JPEG, PNG, GIF
02
Àü¹® ºÐ¾ß¸¦ Á¦¿ÜÇÑ È¸¿ø´ÔÀÌ Á÷Á¢ ÀÛ¼ºÇÑ ±Û¸¸
÷»èÀÌ °¡´ÉÇϸç,

¿Ã·ÁÁֽŠ±ÛÀÇ °­»ç´Ô ÷»èÀº 24½Ã°£ À̳»¿¡
¿Ï·á µÇ´Â °ÍÀ» ¿øÄ¢À¸·Î ÇÏ°í ÀÖ½À´Ï´Ù.
03
ÇÏ·ç °Ô½Ã °¡´ÉÇÑ ±ÛÀº 3ȸ±îÁö À̸ç,
Á¾·áµÈ ¼ö¾÷ÀÇ ¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ °Ô½ÃÆÇÀº
ÀÌ¿ëÀÌ ¾î·Á¿î Á¡ ¾çÇØ ºÎŹ µå¸³´Ï´Ù.
04