¹«·á ·¹º§Å×½ºÆ® ¹Þ°í °­»çÆò°¡ ³²±â¸é 1,OOO¿ø ÄíÆù Áï½Ã Àû¸³!

Ȥ½Ã »çÀÌÆ®¿¡¼± ãÁö ¸øÇÑ ±Ã±ÝÇÑ Á¡ÀÌ ÀÖÀ¸¼¼¿ä?
³²°ÜÁֽŠÀ̸ÞÀÏÀ» ÅëÇØ ´äº¯ µå¸®°Ú½À´Ï´Ù.

¹®ÀÇÇϽŠ³»¿ëÀÌ ¹®ÀÚ·Î ¹ß¼ÛµÇ¿À´Ï
¿¬¶ôó¸¦ ³²°ÜÁÖ¼¼¿ä.
¾÷¹«½Ã°£ ¿ù~±Ý ¿ÀÀü9½Ã~¿ÀÈÄ6½Ã
(Á¡½É½Ã°£ ³·12½Ã~¿ÀÈÄ1½Ã)

¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ °Ô½ÃÆÇ

¿µ¾î ¸»Çϱâ¿Í ¾²±â¸¦ µ¿½Ã¿¡ Àâ´Â´Ù!

ÀڽŠÀÖ°Ô ¾µ ¼ö ÀÖ´Â ¿µÀÛ¹®À» À§ÇØ ÆÄ¿öÀ×±Û¸®½¬ ¼ö¾÷À» ¼ö°­ÇϽôÂ
ȸ¿ø´Ôµé²² ¹«·á·Î Á¦°øÇص帮´Â ºÎ°¡ ¼­ºñ½º·Î, Àü¹® ºÐ¾ß¸¦ Á¦¿ÜÇÑ ÀÚÀ¯ ÁÖÁ¦
¶Ç´Â °­»ç´ÔÀÌ ³»Áֽô °úÁ¦¸¦ ȸ¿ø´Ô²²¼­ ¿µ¾î·Î ÀÛ¼ºÇØÁֽøé,
´ã´ç °­»ç ´Ô²²¼­ ¡®¹®¹ý ¿À·ù ±³Á¤¡¯ °ú ¡®´õ ³ªÀº ¿µ¾î½Ä Ç¥Çö¡¯À¸·Î ±³Á¤ÇØÁÖ´Â
¼­ºñ½º ÀÔ´Ï´Ù.

today\'s homework

ÀÛ¼ºÀÚ: ÀÌ*µµ
2023-09-26 1139

ȸ¿ø´ÔÀÇ ¿µÀÛ¹®

ESSAY: In many countries, children are becoming overweight and unhealthy. Some people think that the government has the responsibility to solve this problem. To what extent do you agree or disagree?

I think that government has not responsibility this problem.
They have responsivilty themselves about overweight and unhealthy problems.
Recently most of countries in the world have private free.
In their countries people can do everything. They can spend their money and eat everything.
But the problems of free have themselves. There are not the thing that they blame their problem.
In my opinion, These are entirely matter of themselves.

°­»ç´ÔÀÇ Ã·»è±³Á¤ ³»¿ë

Hi there Lee! Happy Holidays to you! I hope your Thanksgiving is filled to the brim with gratitude, love, and happiness. Have a wonderful long weekend. I hope you'll have a good time with your favorite people and plenty of memories!
>>> TEACHER GEMMA
I think that government has not responsibility this problem.
>>> I think the government is not responsible for this problem. 
They have responsivilty themselves about overweight and unhealthy problems.
>>> Overweight and health issues are individuals' concerns. 
Recently most of countries in the world have private free.
>>> Recently, most of countries in the world have freedom about anything. 
In their countries people can do everything. 
>>> CORRECT~!^^
They can spend their money and eat everything.
>>> CORRECT~!^^
But the problems of free have themselves. 
>>> But the problem is people tend to abuse their freedom. 
There are not the thing that they blame their problem.
>>> So they shouldn't blame others for having such problems. 
In my opinion, These are entirely matter of themselves.
>>> In my opinion, these should entirely be a concern of themselves.
¹øÈ£ Á¦¸ñ ±Û¾´ÀÌ °ø°³ »óÅ µî·ÏÀÏ Á¶È¸¼ö
129342 Homework ½Å*È­ ¿Ï·á 2023-07-06 2455
129341 HOMEWORK FOR 05/08 Á¶*¾Æ ¿Ï·á 2023-07-06 1
129340 Homework ·ù*¿ì ¿Ï·á 2023-07-06 3724
129339 HOMEWORK FOR 05/17 Á¶*¾Æ ¿Ï·á 2023-07-06 2
129338 7/6 homework ÃÖ*º½ ¿Ï·á 2023-07-06 1771
129337 What and who are your major influences for having your recent... ¹Ú*¿ì ¿Ï·á 2023-07-06 4948
129336 a sleep disorder ¹Î*Á¤ ¿Ï·á 2023-07-06 1
129335 About secondhand clothes ÃÖ*ȯ ¿Ï·á 2023-07-06 2074
129334 Handling work-related stress ÃÖ*ȯ ¿Ï·á 2023-07-06 3424
129333 homework essay(2023. 7. 6.) ¼­*Àº ¿Ï·á 2023-07-06 3
129332 Benefits of traveling alone ÀÌ*°æ ¿Ï·á 2023-07-06 1621
129331 digital ±Ç*Èñ ¿Ï·á 2023-07-06 2348
129330 What do you understand about \"BLACK SHEEP\" in the family? Àå*±Ô ¿Ï·á 2023-07-06 2521
129329 7/6 °í*Áø ¿Ï·á 2023-07-06 4
129328 Homework ½Å*È­ ¿Ï·á 2023-07-05 2043
129327 What are the difficulties encountered during a calamity? ±¸*¹Ì ¿Ï·á 2023-07-05 1
129326 Would you ever consider moving to a country where things aren¡¯t... ±è*¹Î ¿Ï·á 2023-07-05 4
129325 What gives you the courage of working in the Middle East? ¼³*¾Ö ¿Ï·á 2023-07-05 2492
129324 homework 07.05 ÃÖ*Ç ¿Ï·á 2023-07-05 2375
129323 homework Àå*¼® ¿Ï·á 2023-07-05 4408

HOW TO USE IT?

[¸¶ÀÌÆäÀÌÁö > ¼ö¾÷ ³»¿ë º¸±â > ÇнÀ Ķ¸°´õ > ¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ ¹öÆ° Ŭ¸¯]

¼ö¾÷ Ƚ¼ö¸¸Å­ ¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ °Ô½ÃÆÇÀÌ »ý¼ºµÇ¸ç,
Áö³­ ³¯Â¥¿¡µµ °Ô½Ã ÇÒ ¼ö ÀÖ½À´Ï´Ù.

ÁÖ5ȸ ¼ö¾÷ : ¿ù 20ȸ ÀÌ¿ë °¡´É
ÁÖ3ȸ ¼ö¾÷ : ¿ù 12ȸ ÀÌ¿ë °¡´É
ÁÖ2ȸ ¼ö¾÷ : ¿ù 08ȸ ÀÌ¿ë °¡´É
01
±³Á¤ ³»¿ëÀº ÃÖ´ë 1,000byte±îÁö ¿Ã¸± ¼ö ÀÖ½À´Ï´Ù.

÷ºÎ ÆÄÀÏÀº ¿øÈ°ÇÑ Ã·»èÀ» À§ÇÑ Âü°íÀÚ·á·Î »ç¿ëµÉ »Ó,
ÆÄÀÏ¿¡ ´ëÇÑ Ã·»èÀº ºÒ°¡´É ÇÕ´Ï´Ù.

¾÷·Îµå °¡´ÉÇÑ Ã·ºÎ ÆÄÀÏÀº ÃÖ´ë 2mb±îÁöÀ̸ç,
÷ºÎ ÇÒ ¼ö ÀÖ´Â ÆÄÀÏ Çü½ÄÀº ´ÙÀ½°ú °°½À´Ï´Ù.

¹®¼­ - PDF, TXT, DOCX,
À̹ÌÁö - JPEG, PNG, GIF
02
Àü¹® ºÐ¾ß¸¦ Á¦¿ÜÇÑ È¸¿ø´ÔÀÌ Á÷Á¢ ÀÛ¼ºÇÑ ±Û¸¸
÷»èÀÌ °¡´ÉÇϸç,

¿Ã·ÁÁֽŠ±ÛÀÇ °­»ç´Ô ÷»èÀº 24½Ã°£ À̳»¿¡
¿Ï·á µÇ´Â °ÍÀ» ¿øÄ¢À¸·Î ÇÏ°í ÀÖ½À´Ï´Ù.
03
ÇÏ·ç °Ô½Ã °¡´ÉÇÑ ±ÛÀº 3ȸ±îÁö À̸ç,
Á¾·áµÈ ¼ö¾÷ÀÇ ¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ °Ô½ÃÆÇÀº
ÀÌ¿ëÀÌ ¾î·Á¿î Á¡ ¾çÇØ ºÎŹ µå¸³´Ï´Ù.
04