¹«·á ·¹º§Å×½ºÆ® ¹Þ°í °­»çÆò°¡ ³²±â¸é 1,OOO¿ø ÄíÆù Áï½Ã Àû¸³!

Ȥ½Ã »çÀÌÆ®¿¡¼± ãÁö ¸øÇÑ ±Ã±ÝÇÑ Á¡ÀÌ ÀÖÀ¸¼¼¿ä?
³²°ÜÁֽŠÀ̸ÞÀÏÀ» ÅëÇØ ´äº¯ µå¸®°Ú½À´Ï´Ù.

¹®ÀÇÇϽŠ³»¿ëÀÌ ¹®ÀÚ·Î ¹ß¼ÛµÇ¿À´Ï
¿¬¶ôó¸¦ ³²°ÜÁÖ¼¼¿ä.
¾÷¹«½Ã°£ ¿ù~±Ý ¿ÀÀü9½Ã~¿ÀÈÄ6½Ã
(Á¡½É½Ã°£ ³·12½Ã~¿ÀÈÄ1½Ã)

¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ °Ô½ÃÆÇ

¿µ¾î ¸»Çϱâ¿Í ¾²±â¸¦ µ¿½Ã¿¡ Àâ´Â´Ù!

ÀڽŠÀÖ°Ô ¾µ ¼ö ÀÖ´Â ¿µÀÛ¹®À» À§ÇØ ÆÄ¿öÀ×±Û¸®½¬ ¼ö¾÷À» ¼ö°­ÇϽôÂ
ȸ¿ø´Ôµé²² ¹«·á·Î Á¦°øÇص帮´Â ºÎ°¡ ¼­ºñ½º·Î, Àü¹® ºÐ¾ß¸¦ Á¦¿ÜÇÑ ÀÚÀ¯ ÁÖÁ¦
¶Ç´Â °­»ç´ÔÀÌ ³»Áֽô °úÁ¦¸¦ ȸ¿ø´Ô²²¼­ ¿µ¾î·Î ÀÛ¼ºÇØÁֽøé,
´ã´ç °­»ç ´Ô²²¼­ ¡®¹®¹ý ¿À·ù ±³Á¤¡¯ °ú ¡®´õ ³ªÀº ¿µ¾î½Ä Ç¥Çö¡¯À¸·Î ±³Á¤ÇØÁÖ´Â
¼­ºñ½º ÀÔ´Ï´Ù.

today\'s homework

ÀÛ¼ºÀÚ: ÀÌ*µµ
2023-09-26 434

ȸ¿ø´ÔÀÇ ¿µÀÛ¹®

ESSAY: In many countries, children are becoming overweight and unhealthy. Some people think that the government has the responsibility to solve this problem. To what extent do you agree or disagree?

I think that government has not responsibility this problem.
They have responsivilty themselves about overweight and unhealthy problems.
Recently most of countries in the world have private free.
In their countries people can do everything. They can spend their money and eat everything.
But the problems of free have themselves. There are not the thing that they blame their problem.
In my opinion, These are entirely matter of themselves.

°­»ç´ÔÀÇ Ã·»è±³Á¤ ³»¿ë

Hi there Lee! Happy Holidays to you! I hope your Thanksgiving is filled to the brim with gratitude, love, and happiness. Have a wonderful long weekend. I hope you'll have a good time with your favorite people and plenty of memories!
>>> TEACHER GEMMA
I think that government has not responsibility this problem.
>>> I think the government is not responsible for this problem. 
They have responsivilty themselves about overweight and unhealthy problems.
>>> Overweight and health issues are individuals' concerns. 
Recently most of countries in the world have private free.
>>> Recently, most of countries in the world have freedom about anything. 
In their countries people can do everything. 
>>> CORRECT~!^^
They can spend their money and eat everything.
>>> CORRECT~!^^
But the problems of free have themselves. 
>>> But the problem is people tend to abuse their freedom. 
There are not the thing that they blame their problem.
>>> So they shouldn't blame others for having such problems. 
In my opinion, These are entirely matter of themselves.
>>> In my opinion, these should entirely be a concern of themselves.
¹øÈ£ Á¦¸ñ ±Û¾´ÀÌ °ø°³ »óÅ µî·ÏÀÏ Á¶È¸¼ö
131780 What shapes do you like? Why? ÃÖ*ÇÑ ¿Ï·á 2023-10-19 433
131779 Who do you think the target audience is? Why do you think this? ±è*¹Î ¿Ï·á 2023-10-19 1
131778 HOMEWORK ±è* ¿Ï·á 2023-10-19 0
131777 Who is your country¡¯s biggest national hero and why? ¿¡*¹Ì ¿Ï·á 2023-10-19 0
131776 Homework ±è*¼­ ¿Ï·á 2023-10-19 2
131775 Homework ÀÌ*È­ ¿Ï·á 2023-10-19 754
131774 Homework ±è*¼÷ ¿Ï·á 2023-10-19 805
131773 My dream job ÃÖ*ȯ ¿Ï·á 2023-10-19 587
131772 When you were a kid, what were you afraid of? ½Å*¼· ¿Ï·á 2023-10-19 916
131771 Homework ±è* ¿Ï·á 2023-10-19 0
131770 homework ¾È*¿¬ ¿Ï·á 2023-10-19 474
131769 Homework ±è* ¿Ï·á 2023-10-19 0
131768 HOMEWORK: Please write a short paragraph about ¡°Would you like... ¾Ù* ¿Ï·á 2023-10-19 2
131767 What was the last food you ordered at McDonalds? ÀÌ*Èñ ¿Ï·á 2023-10-19 2
131766 Homework ·ù*¿ì ¿Ï·á 2023-10-19 1035
131765 Decision I wish I never made ÀÌ*±Ô ¿Ï·á 2023-10-19 1354
131764 Letter ±Ç*Á¤ ¿Ï·á 2023-10-19 1
131763 What I do to stay healthy ·ù*¿ø ¿Ï·á 2023-10-19 1
131762 My Favorite sport ·ù*¿ø ¿Ï·á 2023-10-19 2
131761 What are the benefits of eating out? ½Å*Á¤ ¿Ï·á 2023-10-19 812

HOW TO USE IT?

[¸¶ÀÌÆäÀÌÁö > ¼ö¾÷ ³»¿ë º¸±â > ÇнÀ Ķ¸°´õ > ¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ ¹öÆ° Ŭ¸¯]

¼ö¾÷ Ƚ¼ö¸¸Å­ ¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ °Ô½ÃÆÇÀÌ »ý¼ºµÇ¸ç,
Áö³­ ³¯Â¥¿¡µµ °Ô½Ã ÇÒ ¼ö ÀÖ½À´Ï´Ù.

ÁÖ5ȸ ¼ö¾÷ : ¿ù 20ȸ ÀÌ¿ë °¡´É
ÁÖ3ȸ ¼ö¾÷ : ¿ù 12ȸ ÀÌ¿ë °¡´É
ÁÖ2ȸ ¼ö¾÷ : ¿ù 08ȸ ÀÌ¿ë °¡´É
01
±³Á¤ ³»¿ëÀº ÃÖ´ë 1,000byte±îÁö ¿Ã¸± ¼ö ÀÖ½À´Ï´Ù.

÷ºÎ ÆÄÀÏÀº ¿øÈ°ÇÑ Ã·»èÀ» À§ÇÑ Âü°íÀÚ·á·Î »ç¿ëµÉ »Ó,
ÆÄÀÏ¿¡ ´ëÇÑ Ã·»èÀº ºÒ°¡´É ÇÕ´Ï´Ù.

¾÷·Îµå °¡´ÉÇÑ Ã·ºÎ ÆÄÀÏÀº ÃÖ´ë 2mb±îÁöÀ̸ç,
÷ºÎ ÇÒ ¼ö ÀÖ´Â ÆÄÀÏ Çü½ÄÀº ´ÙÀ½°ú °°½À´Ï´Ù.

¹®¼­ - PDF, TXT, DOCX,
À̹ÌÁö - JPEG, PNG, GIF
02
Àü¹® ºÐ¾ß¸¦ Á¦¿ÜÇÑ È¸¿ø´ÔÀÌ Á÷Á¢ ÀÛ¼ºÇÑ ±Û¸¸
÷»èÀÌ °¡´ÉÇϸç,

¿Ã·ÁÁֽŠ±ÛÀÇ °­»ç´Ô ÷»èÀº 24½Ã°£ À̳»¿¡
¿Ï·á µÇ´Â °ÍÀ» ¿øÄ¢À¸·Î ÇÏ°í ÀÖ½À´Ï´Ù.
03
ÇÏ·ç °Ô½Ã °¡´ÉÇÑ ±ÛÀº 3ȸ±îÁö À̸ç,
Á¾·áµÈ ¼ö¾÷ÀÇ ¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ °Ô½ÃÆÇÀº
ÀÌ¿ëÀÌ ¾î·Á¿î Á¡ ¾çÇØ ºÎŹ µå¸³´Ï´Ù.
04