¹«·á ·¹º§Å×½ºÆ® ¹Þ°í °­»çÆò°¡ ³²±â¸é 1,OOO¿ø ÄíÆù Áï½Ã Àû¸³!

Ȥ½Ã »çÀÌÆ®¿¡¼± ãÁö ¸øÇÑ ±Ã±ÝÇÑ Á¡ÀÌ ÀÖÀ¸¼¼¿ä?
³²°ÜÁֽŠÀ̸ÞÀÏÀ» ÅëÇØ ´äº¯ µå¸®°Ú½À´Ï´Ù.

¹®ÀÇÇϽŠ³»¿ëÀÌ ¹®ÀÚ·Î ¹ß¼ÛµÇ¿À´Ï
¿¬¶ôó¸¦ ³²°ÜÁÖ¼¼¿ä.
¾÷¹«½Ã°£ ¿ù~±Ý ¿ÀÀü9½Ã~¿ÀÈÄ6½Ã
(Á¡½É½Ã°£ ³·12½Ã~¿ÀÈÄ1½Ã)

¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ °Ô½ÃÆÇ

¿µ¾î ¸»Çϱâ¿Í ¾²±â¸¦ µ¿½Ã¿¡ Àâ´Â´Ù!

ÀڽŠÀÖ°Ô ¾µ ¼ö ÀÖ´Â ¿µÀÛ¹®À» À§ÇØ ÆÄ¿öÀ×±Û¸®½¬ ¼ö¾÷À» ¼ö°­ÇϽôÂ
ȸ¿ø´Ôµé²² ¹«·á·Î Á¦°øÇص帮´Â ºÎ°¡ ¼­ºñ½º·Î, Àü¹® ºÐ¾ß¸¦ Á¦¿ÜÇÑ ÀÚÀ¯ ÁÖÁ¦
¶Ç´Â °­»ç´ÔÀÌ ³»Áֽô °úÁ¦¸¦ ȸ¿ø´Ô²²¼­ ¿µ¾î·Î ÀÛ¼ºÇØÁֽøé,
´ã´ç °­»ç ´Ô²²¼­ ¡®¹®¹ý ¿À·ù ±³Á¤¡¯ °ú ¡®´õ ³ªÀº ¿µ¾î½Ä Ç¥Çö¡¯À¸·Î ±³Á¤ÇØÁÖ´Â
¼­ºñ½º ÀÔ´Ï´Ù.

homework 09.22

ÀÛ¼ºÀÚ: ÃÖ*Ç
2023-09-22 988

ȸ¿ø´ÔÀÇ ¿µÀÛ¹®

~ Writing Task:
Please answer the question:
Should companies ban their employees from using social networking sites at work?

In my opinion, if we don't free time, it's not good to do social networking sites.
Because, there is a working place.
A few years ago YouTube became popular in Korea, and even office employees YouTubers are popular.
They are did filmed, edited, and posted their daily life on YouTube while working at their company.
But, there are many company don't like this behavior.
Because they work for their social media instead of main job at the company.
I think, except in special cases, it's not a good idea to do social networking for a long time during work.

°­»ç´ÔÀÇ Ã·»è±³Á¤ ³»¿ë

Good day, Keon!
Thank you so much for taking time in answering the question. Your ideas and opinions are on point. Keep it up! :)
~ T. Camille


~ Writing Task:
Please answer the question:
Should companies ban their employees from using social networking sites at work?


In my opinion, if we don't free time, it's not good to do social networking sites.
>> In my opinion, if we don't have free time, it's not good to do social networking sites.
Because, there is a working place.
>> That's because it is our work place.
A few years ago YouTube became popular in Korea, and even office employees YouTubers are popular.
>> CORRECT!
They are did filmed, edited, and posted their daily life on YouTube while working at their company.
>> They film, edit, and post their daily life on YouTube while working in their company.
But, there are many company don't like this behavior.
>> But, there are many companies that don't like this behavior.
Because they work for their social media instead of main job at the company.
>> It's because they work for their social media instead of their main job in the company.
I think, except in special cases, it's not a good idea to do social networking for a long time during work.
>> CORRECT!

¹øÈ£ Á¦¸ñ ±Û¾´ÀÌ °ø°³ »óÅ µî·ÏÀÏ Á¶È¸¼ö
131423 What do you think of children¡¯s literature? ¿¡*¹Ì ¿Ï·á 2023-10-04 2
131422 homework Á¤*È£ ¿Ï·á 2023-10-04 0
131421 Is the issue of healthy eating important to you? À¯* ¿Ï·á 2023-10-04 1346
131420 HOMEWORK: Please write a short paragraph about ¡°My most... ¾Ù* ¿Ï·á 2023-10-04 2
131419 Where do you think is the best place to live in the world? Why? ÀÌ*¿ì ¿Ï·á 2023-10-04 2
131418 Homework ·ù*¿ì ¿Ï·á 2023-10-04 2338
131417 Homework ±è*¿ì ¿Ï·á 2023-10-04 1106
131416 231004-HOMEWORK ¾ç*¾Ö ¿Ï·á 2023-10-04 1
131415 Whose feedback or opinion do you value most? Why? ±è*¾Æ ¿Ï·á 2023-10-04 2
131414 Is it always important to prepare for the future? ÀÌ*ÅÂ ¿Ï·á 2023-10-04 1337
131413 What is your message to your fellow Koreans to stop pollution? ÀÌ*ÅÂ ¿Ï·á 2023-10-04 1672
131412 What is the most difficult part of your job? ÀÌ*ÅÂ ¿Ï·á 2023-10-04 1292
131411 Would it be a big problem for you if your cell phone was lost or... ÀÌ*ÅÂ ¿Ï·á 2023-10-04 1357
131410 If you were a tourist, what kind of experiences would you look... ±è*¿ø ¿Ï·á 2023-10-04 1
131409 Favorite things at family gatherings ·ù*¿ø ¿Ï·á 2023-10-04 1
131408 When I send a dish back °­*À² ¿Ï·á 2023-10-04 1
131407 HOMEWORK ±è*Áö ¿Ï·á 2023-10-04 1368
131406 HOMEWORK ±è*Áö ¿Ï·á 2023-10-04 1720
131405 Hope ±è*¾Æ ¿Ï·á 2023-10-04 1018
131404 Homework ±è*´Ô ¿Ï·á 2023-10-03 1540

HOW TO USE IT?

[¸¶ÀÌÆäÀÌÁö > ¼ö¾÷ ³»¿ë º¸±â > ÇнÀ Ķ¸°´õ > ¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ ¹öÆ° Ŭ¸¯]

¼ö¾÷ Ƚ¼ö¸¸Å­ ¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ °Ô½ÃÆÇÀÌ »ý¼ºµÇ¸ç,
Áö³­ ³¯Â¥¿¡µµ °Ô½Ã ÇÒ ¼ö ÀÖ½À´Ï´Ù.

ÁÖ5ȸ ¼ö¾÷ : ¿ù 20ȸ ÀÌ¿ë °¡´É
ÁÖ3ȸ ¼ö¾÷ : ¿ù 12ȸ ÀÌ¿ë °¡´É
ÁÖ2ȸ ¼ö¾÷ : ¿ù 08ȸ ÀÌ¿ë °¡´É
01
±³Á¤ ³»¿ëÀº ÃÖ´ë 1,000byte±îÁö ¿Ã¸± ¼ö ÀÖ½À´Ï´Ù.

÷ºÎ ÆÄÀÏÀº ¿øÈ°ÇÑ Ã·»èÀ» À§ÇÑ Âü°íÀÚ·á·Î »ç¿ëµÉ »Ó,
ÆÄÀÏ¿¡ ´ëÇÑ Ã·»èÀº ºÒ°¡´É ÇÕ´Ï´Ù.

¾÷·Îµå °¡´ÉÇÑ Ã·ºÎ ÆÄÀÏÀº ÃÖ´ë 2mb±îÁöÀ̸ç,
÷ºÎ ÇÒ ¼ö ÀÖ´Â ÆÄÀÏ Çü½ÄÀº ´ÙÀ½°ú °°½À´Ï´Ù.

¹®¼­ - PDF, TXT, DOCX,
À̹ÌÁö - JPEG, PNG, GIF
02
Àü¹® ºÐ¾ß¸¦ Á¦¿ÜÇÑ È¸¿ø´ÔÀÌ Á÷Á¢ ÀÛ¼ºÇÑ ±Û¸¸
÷»èÀÌ °¡´ÉÇϸç,

¿Ã·ÁÁֽŠ±ÛÀÇ °­»ç´Ô ÷»èÀº 24½Ã°£ À̳»¿¡
¿Ï·á µÇ´Â °ÍÀ» ¿øÄ¢À¸·Î ÇÏ°í ÀÖ½À´Ï´Ù.
03
ÇÏ·ç °Ô½Ã °¡´ÉÇÑ ±ÛÀº 3ȸ±îÁö À̸ç,
Á¾·áµÈ ¼ö¾÷ÀÇ ¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ °Ô½ÃÆÇÀº
ÀÌ¿ëÀÌ ¾î·Á¿î Á¡ ¾çÇØ ºÎŹ µå¸³´Ï´Ù.
04