¹«·á ·¹º§Å×½ºÆ® ¹Þ°í °­»çÆò°¡ ³²±â¸é 1,OOO¿ø ÄíÆù Áï½Ã Àû¸³!

Ȥ½Ã »çÀÌÆ®¿¡¼± ãÁö ¸øÇÑ ±Ã±ÝÇÑ Á¡ÀÌ ÀÖÀ¸¼¼¿ä?
³²°ÜÁֽŠÀ̸ÞÀÏÀ» ÅëÇØ ´äº¯ µå¸®°Ú½À´Ï´Ù.

¹®ÀÇÇϽŠ³»¿ëÀÌ ¹®ÀÚ·Î ¹ß¼ÛµÇ¿À´Ï
¿¬¶ôó¸¦ ³²°ÜÁÖ¼¼¿ä.
¾÷¹«½Ã°£ ¿ù~±Ý ¿ÀÀü9½Ã~¿ÀÈÄ6½Ã
(Á¡½É½Ã°£ ³·12½Ã~¿ÀÈÄ1½Ã)

¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ °Ô½ÃÆÇ

¿µ¾î ¸»Çϱâ¿Í ¾²±â¸¦ µ¿½Ã¿¡ Àâ´Â´Ù!

ÀڽŠÀÖ°Ô ¾µ ¼ö ÀÖ´Â ¿µÀÛ¹®À» À§ÇØ ÆÄ¿öÀ×±Û¸®½¬ ¼ö¾÷À» ¼ö°­ÇϽôÂ
ȸ¿ø´Ôµé²² ¹«·á·Î Á¦°øÇص帮´Â ºÎ°¡ ¼­ºñ½º·Î, Àü¹® ºÐ¾ß¸¦ Á¦¿ÜÇÑ ÀÚÀ¯ ÁÖÁ¦
¶Ç´Â °­»ç´ÔÀÌ ³»Áֽô °úÁ¦¸¦ ȸ¿ø´Ô²²¼­ ¿µ¾î·Î ÀÛ¼ºÇØÁֽøé,
´ã´ç °­»ç ´Ô²²¼­ ¡®¹®¹ý ¿À·ù ±³Á¤¡¯ °ú ¡®´õ ³ªÀº ¿µ¾î½Ä Ç¥Çö¡¯À¸·Î ±³Á¤ÇØÁÖ´Â
¼­ºñ½º ÀÔ´Ï´Ù.

today\'s homework

ÀÛ¼ºÀÚ: ÀÌ*µµ
2023-09-21 1119

ȸ¿ø´ÔÀÇ ¿µÀÛ¹®

HOMEWORK FOR TODAY:
ESSAY: People are becoming too dependent on the Internet and phone. Is it a positive or negative development?

I think it is more negative effect than positive.
Information are the more the better. but the most important thing is gather collect info.
We see many information in YouTube, TicTok, and unnamed dictionary and then this info are incollect.
For example there are info about car. they say that this madicine are cleaned headlights but it isn't not effect.
And the diet method in YouTube are not good for losing weight.
Many info are good. But collect info are the most important.

°­»ç´ÔÀÇ Ã·»è±³Á¤ ³»¿ë

Hi there Lee~!^^ Happy Friday! May this Friday bring you happiness and cheer. May you be surrounded by blessings. I hope your day is filled with fun and excitement, love and laughter, food and friends. See you on Monday!
>>> TEACHER GEMMA
I think it is more negative effect than positive.
>>> I think the negative outweigh the positive effect.
Information are the more the better. but the most important thing is gather collect info.
>>> Getting much information is an advantage but the most important thing is collecting knowledges. 
We see many information in YouTube, TicTok, and unnamed dictionary and then this info are incollect.
>>> We can read a lot of imformation on YouTube, TikTok and unnamed dictionary and then some information is incorrect.
For example there are info about car.
>>> For instance, information about cars. 
 they say that this madicine are cleaned headlights but it isn't not effect.
>>> They say that this substance can clean the headlights but it isn't effective.
And the diet method in YouTube are not good for losing weight.
>>> Diet information in YouTube is not good for losing weight.
Many info are good. 
>>> Many information are useful. 
But collect info are the most important.
>>> However, collecting information is more important. 
¹øÈ£ Á¦¸ñ ±Û¾´ÀÌ °ø°³ »óÅ µî·ÏÀÏ Á¶È¸¼ö
128058 3.May.2023 ±è*Á¤ ¿Ï·á 2023-05-08 2
128057 Pros and cons about public transportation ¼º*°æ ¿Ï·á 2023-05-08 0
128056 It depend on an age. ÀÌ*¿õ ¿Ï·á 2023-05-08 2
128055 What do you think makes Korean pop music different form other... ±è*¿ø ¿Ï·á 2023-05-07 926
128054 How will your personal responsibilities affect your job? ±¸*¹Ì ¿Ï·á 2023-05-07 1
128053 Writing task ¾È*Çü ¿Ï·á 2023-05-07 784
128052 Homework ¿ì*ÁÖ ¿Ï·á 2023-05-07 596
128051 My favorite video to watch on youtube ¼Û*¿ì ¿Ï·á 2023-05-07 769
128050 Do you worry about the health of those around you? ±è*±¹ ¿Ï·á 2023-05-07 1
128049 Homework ÀÌ*°æ ¿Ï·á 2023-05-07 0
128048 Homework ÀÌ*°æ ¿Ï·á 2023-05-07 0
128047 Homework ÀÌ*°æ ¿Ï·á 2023-05-07 1
128046 Homework ÀÌ*°æ ¿Ï·á 2023-05-07 1
128045 Homework ±è*¿ì ¿Ï·á 2023-05-07 844
128044 What is the most positive change you have experienced in your... Á¤*È­ ¿Ï·á 2023-05-06 757
128043 What is the most positive change you have experienced in your... ½Å*¼· ¿Ï·á 2023-05-06 807
128042 Hello~ ¿À*º½ ¿Ï·á 2023-05-05 4
128041 Homework ½Å*È­ ¿Ï·á 2023-05-05 760
128040 Homework ¼Û*¿ì ¿Ï·á 2023-05-05 784
128039 Should illegal immigrants be treated as criminals? Why or why... ±è*±Ô ¿Ï·á 2023-05-05 0

HOW TO USE IT?

[¸¶ÀÌÆäÀÌÁö > ¼ö¾÷ ³»¿ë º¸±â > ÇнÀ Ķ¸°´õ > ¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ ¹öÆ° Ŭ¸¯]

¼ö¾÷ Ƚ¼ö¸¸Å­ ¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ °Ô½ÃÆÇÀÌ »ý¼ºµÇ¸ç,
Áö³­ ³¯Â¥¿¡µµ °Ô½Ã ÇÒ ¼ö ÀÖ½À´Ï´Ù.

ÁÖ5ȸ ¼ö¾÷ : ¿ù 20ȸ ÀÌ¿ë °¡´É
ÁÖ3ȸ ¼ö¾÷ : ¿ù 12ȸ ÀÌ¿ë °¡´É
ÁÖ2ȸ ¼ö¾÷ : ¿ù 08ȸ ÀÌ¿ë °¡´É
01
±³Á¤ ³»¿ëÀº ÃÖ´ë 1,000byte±îÁö ¿Ã¸± ¼ö ÀÖ½À´Ï´Ù.

÷ºÎ ÆÄÀÏÀº ¿øÈ°ÇÑ Ã·»èÀ» À§ÇÑ Âü°íÀÚ·á·Î »ç¿ëµÉ »Ó,
ÆÄÀÏ¿¡ ´ëÇÑ Ã·»èÀº ºÒ°¡´É ÇÕ´Ï´Ù.

¾÷·Îµå °¡´ÉÇÑ Ã·ºÎ ÆÄÀÏÀº ÃÖ´ë 2mb±îÁöÀ̸ç,
÷ºÎ ÇÒ ¼ö ÀÖ´Â ÆÄÀÏ Çü½ÄÀº ´ÙÀ½°ú °°½À´Ï´Ù.

¹®¼­ - PDF, TXT, DOCX,
À̹ÌÁö - JPEG, PNG, GIF
02
Àü¹® ºÐ¾ß¸¦ Á¦¿ÜÇÑ È¸¿ø´ÔÀÌ Á÷Á¢ ÀÛ¼ºÇÑ ±Û¸¸
÷»èÀÌ °¡´ÉÇϸç,

¿Ã·ÁÁֽŠ±ÛÀÇ °­»ç´Ô ÷»èÀº 24½Ã°£ À̳»¿¡
¿Ï·á µÇ´Â °ÍÀ» ¿øÄ¢À¸·Î ÇÏ°í ÀÖ½À´Ï´Ù.
03
ÇÏ·ç °Ô½Ã °¡´ÉÇÑ ±ÛÀº 3ȸ±îÁö À̸ç,
Á¾·áµÈ ¼ö¾÷ÀÇ ¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ °Ô½ÃÆÇÀº
ÀÌ¿ëÀÌ ¾î·Á¿î Á¡ ¾çÇØ ºÎŹ µå¸³´Ï´Ù.
04