¹«·á ·¹º§Å×½ºÆ® ¹Þ°í °­»çÆò°¡ ³²±â¸é 1,OOO¿ø ÄíÆù Áï½Ã Àû¸³!

Ȥ½Ã »çÀÌÆ®¿¡¼± ãÁö ¸øÇÑ ±Ã±ÝÇÑ Á¡ÀÌ ÀÖÀ¸¼¼¿ä?
³²°ÜÁֽŠÀ̸ÞÀÏÀ» ÅëÇØ ´äº¯ µå¸®°Ú½À´Ï´Ù.

¹®ÀÇÇϽŠ³»¿ëÀÌ ¹®ÀÚ·Î ¹ß¼ÛµÇ¿À´Ï
¿¬¶ôó¸¦ ³²°ÜÁÖ¼¼¿ä.
¾÷¹«½Ã°£ ¿ù~±Ý ¿ÀÀü9½Ã~¿ÀÈÄ6½Ã
(Á¡½É½Ã°£ ³·12½Ã~¿ÀÈÄ1½Ã)

¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ °Ô½ÃÆÇ

¿µ¾î ¸»Çϱâ¿Í ¾²±â¸¦ µ¿½Ã¿¡ Àâ´Â´Ù!

ÀڽŠÀÖ°Ô ¾µ ¼ö ÀÖ´Â ¿µÀÛ¹®À» À§ÇØ ÆÄ¿öÀ×±Û¸®½¬ ¼ö¾÷À» ¼ö°­ÇϽôÂ
ȸ¿ø´Ôµé²² ¹«·á·Î Á¦°øÇص帮´Â ºÎ°¡ ¼­ºñ½º·Î, Àü¹® ºÐ¾ß¸¦ Á¦¿ÜÇÑ ÀÚÀ¯ ÁÖÁ¦
¶Ç´Â °­»ç´ÔÀÌ ³»Áֽô °úÁ¦¸¦ ȸ¿ø´Ô²²¼­ ¿µ¾î·Î ÀÛ¼ºÇØÁֽøé,
´ã´ç °­»ç ´Ô²²¼­ ¡®¹®¹ý ¿À·ù ±³Á¤¡¯ °ú ¡®´õ ³ªÀº ¿µ¾î½Ä Ç¥Çö¡¯À¸·Î ±³Á¤ÇØÁÖ´Â
¼­ºñ½º ÀÔ´Ï´Ù.

9/18 homework

ÀÛ¼ºÀÚ: À±*Çö
2023-09-19 384

ȸ¿ø´ÔÀÇ ¿µÀÛ¹®

I have included in a nuclear family since I was young.
So I have never experienced the advantages and disadvantages of extended family.
I think a nuclear family is not complicated and the possibility of happening adverse events is low, because the number of family members is small.
Also, family members get enough personal space and time for refreshing.
However, sometimes family members can feel lonely in a nuclear family.
I prefer a nuclear family, but in the future I hope to live with my father, mother, my younger sister's family, and my future husband.
It will be great to live with them in a big house with good scenery.

°­»ç´ÔÀÇ Ã·»è±³Á¤ ³»¿ë

Hi there, Stella! Wow! You did really well in this homework. I only noted very simple matters regarding the sentences that you made. You are really doing great when it comes to improving the sentences you are making. I'm really happy because of that. As always, we will continue to have more practice again in the class. See you there! ~ T. Marie ^^
I have included in a nuclear family since I was young.
>> I have been included in a nuclerar family since I was young. 
So I have never experienced the advantages and disadvantages of extended family.
>> CORRECT SENTENCE
I think a nuclear family is not complicated and the possibility of happening adverse events is low, because the number of family members is small.
>> CORRECT SENTENCE
Also, family members get enough personal space and time for refreshing.
>> Also, family members get enough personal space and time to refresh
However, sometimes family members can feel lonely in a nuclear family.
>> CORRECT SENTENCE
I prefer a nuclear family, but in the future I hope to live with my father, mother, my younger sister's family, and my future husband.
>> CORRECT SENTENCE
It will be great to live with them in a big house with good scenery.
>> CORRECT SENTENCE
¹øÈ£ Á¦¸ñ ±Û¾´ÀÌ °ø°³ »óÅ µî·ÏÀÏ Á¶È¸¼ö
129065 Homework È«*¼± ¿Ï·á 2023-06-26 1
129064 Homework ½Å*È­ ¿Ï·á 2023-06-26 969
129063 How can you say that a country has a good leader? ±è*±Ô ¿Ï·á 2023-06-26 0
129062 Do you leave confidential information in a voice mail? ±¸*¹Ì ¿Ï·á 2023-06-25 1
129061 Should the fashion industry use models that look more like... ±¸*¿ì ¿Ï·á 2023-06-25 761
129060 Who is the person you admire the most? Why? ±¸*¿ì ¿Ï·á 2023-06-25 1627
129059 Should cell phones be allowed at school? Why or why not? ±¸*¿ì ¿Ï·á 2023-06-25 1009
129058 Night¡¯s sleep Á¶*¿µ ¿Ï·á 2023-06-25 1891
129057 Homework ±è*¿ì ¿Ï·á 2023-06-25 1377
129056 HOMEWORK1 ÀÌ*½Â ¿Ï·á 2023-06-25 1
129055 Writing Task 0623 À¯*Èñ ¿Ï·á 2023-06-25 1
129054 Are you a health-conscious person? ±è*±¹ ¿Ï·á 2023-06-25 2
129053 Which among your goals have you already achived? ¹®*¿í ¿Ï·á 2023-06-25 453
129052 Why do many people from different parts of the world want to... ¹®*¿í ¿Ï·á 2023-06-25 333
129051 What is your favorite color? Why? °­*¿¬ ¿Ï·á 2023-06-25 357
129050 Homework 6/23 ±è*¾Æ ¿Ï·á 2023-06-25 2
129049 Who is the most inspiring athlete you know? Why? ¿À*Çõ ¿Ï·á 2023-06-25 2
129048 My favorite song ¼Û*¿ì ¿Ï·á 2023-06-24 547
129047 the best place in my country ¹Î*Á¤ ¿Ï·á 2023-06-24 0
129046 Can an AI have compassion or a sense of justice? ±è*¹Î ¿Ï·á 2023-06-24 5

HOW TO USE IT?

[¸¶ÀÌÆäÀÌÁö > ¼ö¾÷ ³»¿ë º¸±â > ÇнÀ Ķ¸°´õ > ¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ ¹öÆ° Ŭ¸¯]

¼ö¾÷ Ƚ¼ö¸¸Å­ ¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ °Ô½ÃÆÇÀÌ »ý¼ºµÇ¸ç,
Áö³­ ³¯Â¥¿¡µµ °Ô½Ã ÇÒ ¼ö ÀÖ½À´Ï´Ù.

ÁÖ5ȸ ¼ö¾÷ : ¿ù 20ȸ ÀÌ¿ë °¡´É
ÁÖ3ȸ ¼ö¾÷ : ¿ù 12ȸ ÀÌ¿ë °¡´É
ÁÖ2ȸ ¼ö¾÷ : ¿ù 08ȸ ÀÌ¿ë °¡´É
01
±³Á¤ ³»¿ëÀº ÃÖ´ë 1,000byte±îÁö ¿Ã¸± ¼ö ÀÖ½À´Ï´Ù.

÷ºÎ ÆÄÀÏÀº ¿øÈ°ÇÑ Ã·»èÀ» À§ÇÑ Âü°íÀÚ·á·Î »ç¿ëµÉ »Ó,
ÆÄÀÏ¿¡ ´ëÇÑ Ã·»èÀº ºÒ°¡´É ÇÕ´Ï´Ù.

¾÷·Îµå °¡´ÉÇÑ Ã·ºÎ ÆÄÀÏÀº ÃÖ´ë 2mb±îÁöÀ̸ç,
÷ºÎ ÇÒ ¼ö ÀÖ´Â ÆÄÀÏ Çü½ÄÀº ´ÙÀ½°ú °°½À´Ï´Ù.

¹®¼­ - PDF, TXT, DOCX,
À̹ÌÁö - JPEG, PNG, GIF
02
Àü¹® ºÐ¾ß¸¦ Á¦¿ÜÇÑ È¸¿ø´ÔÀÌ Á÷Á¢ ÀÛ¼ºÇÑ ±Û¸¸
÷»èÀÌ °¡´ÉÇϸç,

¿Ã·ÁÁֽŠ±ÛÀÇ °­»ç´Ô ÷»èÀº 24½Ã°£ À̳»¿¡
¿Ï·á µÇ´Â °ÍÀ» ¿øÄ¢À¸·Î ÇÏ°í ÀÖ½À´Ï´Ù.
03
ÇÏ·ç °Ô½Ã °¡´ÉÇÑ ±ÛÀº 3ȸ±îÁö À̸ç,
Á¾·áµÈ ¼ö¾÷ÀÇ ¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ °Ô½ÃÆÇÀº
ÀÌ¿ëÀÌ ¾î·Á¿î Á¡ ¾çÇØ ºÎŹ µå¸³´Ï´Ù.
04