¹«·á ·¹º§Å×½ºÆ® ¹Þ°í °­»çÆò°¡ ³²±â¸é 1,OOO¿ø ÄíÆù Áï½Ã Àû¸³!

Ȥ½Ã »çÀÌÆ®¿¡¼± ãÁö ¸øÇÑ ±Ã±ÝÇÑ Á¡ÀÌ ÀÖÀ¸¼¼¿ä?
³²°ÜÁֽŠÀ̸ÞÀÏÀ» ÅëÇØ ´äº¯ µå¸®°Ú½À´Ï´Ù.

¹®ÀÇÇϽŠ³»¿ëÀÌ ¹®ÀÚ·Î ¹ß¼ÛµÇ¿À´Ï
¿¬¶ôó¸¦ ³²°ÜÁÖ¼¼¿ä.
¾÷¹«½Ã°£ ¿ù~±Ý ¿ÀÀü9½Ã~¿ÀÈÄ6½Ã
(Á¡½É½Ã°£ ³·12½Ã~¿ÀÈÄ1½Ã)

¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ °Ô½ÃÆÇ

¿µ¾î ¸»Çϱâ¿Í ¾²±â¸¦ µ¿½Ã¿¡ Àâ´Â´Ù!

ÀڽŠÀÖ°Ô ¾µ ¼ö ÀÖ´Â ¿µÀÛ¹®À» À§ÇØ ÆÄ¿öÀ×±Û¸®½¬ ¼ö¾÷À» ¼ö°­ÇϽôÂ
ȸ¿ø´Ôµé²² ¹«·á·Î Á¦°øÇص帮´Â ºÎ°¡ ¼­ºñ½º·Î, Àü¹® ºÐ¾ß¸¦ Á¦¿ÜÇÑ ÀÚÀ¯ ÁÖÁ¦
¶Ç´Â °­»ç´ÔÀÌ ³»Áֽô °úÁ¦¸¦ ȸ¿ø´Ô²²¼­ ¿µ¾î·Î ÀÛ¼ºÇØÁֽøé,
´ã´ç °­»ç ´Ô²²¼­ ¡®¹®¹ý ¿À·ù ±³Á¤¡¯ °ú ¡®´õ ³ªÀº ¿µ¾î½Ä Ç¥Çö¡¯À¸·Î ±³Á¤ÇØÁÖ´Â
¼­ºñ½º ÀÔ´Ï´Ù.

9/18 homework

ÀÛ¼ºÀÚ: À±*Çö
2023-09-19 347

ȸ¿ø´ÔÀÇ ¿µÀÛ¹®

I have included in a nuclear family since I was young.
So I have never experienced the advantages and disadvantages of extended family.
I think a nuclear family is not complicated and the possibility of happening adverse events is low, because the number of family members is small.
Also, family members get enough personal space and time for refreshing.
However, sometimes family members can feel lonely in a nuclear family.
I prefer a nuclear family, but in the future I hope to live with my father, mother, my younger sister's family, and my future husband.
It will be great to live with them in a big house with good scenery.

°­»ç´ÔÀÇ Ã·»è±³Á¤ ³»¿ë

Hi there, Stella! Wow! You did really well in this homework. I only noted very simple matters regarding the sentences that you made. You are really doing great when it comes to improving the sentences you are making. I'm really happy because of that. As always, we will continue to have more practice again in the class. See you there! ~ T. Marie ^^
I have included in a nuclear family since I was young.
>> I have been included in a nuclerar family since I was young. 
So I have never experienced the advantages and disadvantages of extended family.
>> CORRECT SENTENCE
I think a nuclear family is not complicated and the possibility of happening adverse events is low, because the number of family members is small.
>> CORRECT SENTENCE
Also, family members get enough personal space and time for refreshing.
>> Also, family members get enough personal space and time to refresh
However, sometimes family members can feel lonely in a nuclear family.
>> CORRECT SENTENCE
I prefer a nuclear family, but in the future I hope to live with my father, mother, my younger sister's family, and my future husband.
>> CORRECT SENTENCE
It will be great to live with them in a big house with good scenery.
>> CORRECT SENTENCE
¹øÈ£ Á¦¸ñ ±Û¾´ÀÌ °ø°³ »óÅ µî·ÏÀÏ Á¶È¸¼ö
129805 What do you usually do when you get home from sports camp? ÀÓ*È£ ¿Ï·á 2023-07-27 0
129804 How do you pursue your passions? ½Å*¼· ¿Ï·á 2023-07-27 1575
129803 WRITING TASK: How old do you think children should be before... ÀÓ*Áö ¿Ï·á 2023-07-27 2
129802 What would motivate you to continue working out? Áö* ¿Ï·á 2023-07-27 0
129801 Homework ±Ç*¹Ì ¿Ï·á 2023-07-27 0
129800 Homework ±Ç*¹Ì ¿Ï·á 2023-07-27 1
129799 Homework ±è*ȯ ¿Ï·á 2023-07-27 1456
129798 How can self-introduction help build a relationship? ¹Ú*¾Æ ¿Ï·á 2023-07-27 1135
129797 Homework ½Å*È­ ¿Ï·á 2023-07-27 1225
129796 Korea\'s Big Companies ÀÌ*ÅÂ ¿Ï·á 2023-07-27 1746
129795 Homework ½Å*È­ ¿Ï·á 2023-07-27 3215
129794 Korea\'s Apartments, overpricing or not? and why? ÀÌ*ÅÂ ¿Ï·á 2023-07-27 1687
129793 The disadvantages of wearing make-up ÀÌ*ÅÂ ¿Ï·á 2023-07-27 1310
129792 Homework ±Ç*¹Ì ¿Ï·á 2023-07-27 0
129791 Homework ±Ç*¹Ì ¿Ï·á 2023-07-27 1
129790 homework ±è*¾Æ ¿Ï·á 2023-07-27 1321
129789 What do you plan to do this summer school vacation? Write about... ¿À*Çõ ¿Ï·á 2023-07-27 1
129788 homework Àå*¼® ¿Ï·á 2023-07-27 1120
129787 Why self respect is important ±è*¿ì ¿Ï·á 2023-07-27 0
129786 Day9 ½Å*À± ¿Ï·á 2023-07-27 0

HOW TO USE IT?

[¸¶ÀÌÆäÀÌÁö > ¼ö¾÷ ³»¿ë º¸±â > ÇнÀ Ķ¸°´õ > ¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ ¹öÆ° Ŭ¸¯]

¼ö¾÷ Ƚ¼ö¸¸Å­ ¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ °Ô½ÃÆÇÀÌ »ý¼ºµÇ¸ç,
Áö³­ ³¯Â¥¿¡µµ °Ô½Ã ÇÒ ¼ö ÀÖ½À´Ï´Ù.

ÁÖ5ȸ ¼ö¾÷ : ¿ù 20ȸ ÀÌ¿ë °¡´É
ÁÖ3ȸ ¼ö¾÷ : ¿ù 12ȸ ÀÌ¿ë °¡´É
ÁÖ2ȸ ¼ö¾÷ : ¿ù 08ȸ ÀÌ¿ë °¡´É
01
±³Á¤ ³»¿ëÀº ÃÖ´ë 1,000byte±îÁö ¿Ã¸± ¼ö ÀÖ½À´Ï´Ù.

÷ºÎ ÆÄÀÏÀº ¿øÈ°ÇÑ Ã·»èÀ» À§ÇÑ Âü°íÀÚ·á·Î »ç¿ëµÉ »Ó,
ÆÄÀÏ¿¡ ´ëÇÑ Ã·»èÀº ºÒ°¡´É ÇÕ´Ï´Ù.

¾÷·Îµå °¡´ÉÇÑ Ã·ºÎ ÆÄÀÏÀº ÃÖ´ë 2mb±îÁöÀ̸ç,
÷ºÎ ÇÒ ¼ö ÀÖ´Â ÆÄÀÏ Çü½ÄÀº ´ÙÀ½°ú °°½À´Ï´Ù.

¹®¼­ - PDF, TXT, DOCX,
À̹ÌÁö - JPEG, PNG, GIF
02
Àü¹® ºÐ¾ß¸¦ Á¦¿ÜÇÑ È¸¿ø´ÔÀÌ Á÷Á¢ ÀÛ¼ºÇÑ ±Û¸¸
÷»èÀÌ °¡´ÉÇϸç,

¿Ã·ÁÁֽŠ±ÛÀÇ °­»ç´Ô ÷»èÀº 24½Ã°£ À̳»¿¡
¿Ï·á µÇ´Â °ÍÀ» ¿øÄ¢À¸·Î ÇÏ°í ÀÖ½À´Ï´Ù.
03
ÇÏ·ç °Ô½Ã °¡´ÉÇÑ ±ÛÀº 3ȸ±îÁö À̸ç,
Á¾·áµÈ ¼ö¾÷ÀÇ ¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ °Ô½ÃÆÇÀº
ÀÌ¿ëÀÌ ¾î·Á¿î Á¡ ¾çÇØ ºÎŹ µå¸³´Ï´Ù.
04