¹«·á ·¹º§Å×½ºÆ® ¹Þ°í °­»çÆò°¡ ³²±â¸é 1,OOO¿ø ÄíÆù Áï½Ã Àû¸³!

Ȥ½Ã »çÀÌÆ®¿¡¼± ãÁö ¸øÇÑ ±Ã±ÝÇÑ Á¡ÀÌ ÀÖÀ¸¼¼¿ä?
³²°ÜÁֽŠÀ̸ÞÀÏÀ» ÅëÇØ ´äº¯ µå¸®°Ú½À´Ï´Ù.

¹®ÀÇÇϽŠ³»¿ëÀÌ ¹®ÀÚ·Î ¹ß¼ÛµÇ¿À´Ï
¿¬¶ôó¸¦ ³²°ÜÁÖ¼¼¿ä.
¾÷¹«½Ã°£ ¿ù~±Ý ¿ÀÀü9½Ã~¿ÀÈÄ6½Ã
(Á¡½É½Ã°£ ³·12½Ã~¿ÀÈÄ1½Ã)

¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ °Ô½ÃÆÇ

¿µ¾î ¸»Çϱâ¿Í ¾²±â¸¦ µ¿½Ã¿¡ Àâ´Â´Ù!

ÀڽŠÀÖ°Ô ¾µ ¼ö ÀÖ´Â ¿µÀÛ¹®À» À§ÇØ ÆÄ¿öÀ×±Û¸®½¬ ¼ö¾÷À» ¼ö°­ÇϽôÂ
ȸ¿ø´Ôµé²² ¹«·á·Î Á¦°øÇص帮´Â ºÎ°¡ ¼­ºñ½º·Î, Àü¹® ºÐ¾ß¸¦ Á¦¿ÜÇÑ ÀÚÀ¯ ÁÖÁ¦
¶Ç´Â °­»ç´ÔÀÌ ³»Áֽô °úÁ¦¸¦ ȸ¿ø´Ô²²¼­ ¿µ¾î·Î ÀÛ¼ºÇØÁֽøé,
´ã´ç °­»ç ´Ô²²¼­ ¡®¹®¹ý ¿À·ù ±³Á¤¡¯ °ú ¡®´õ ³ªÀº ¿µ¾î½Ä Ç¥Çö¡¯À¸·Î ±³Á¤ÇØÁÖ´Â
¼­ºñ½º ÀÔ´Ï´Ù.

9/18 homework

ÀÛ¼ºÀÚ: À±*Çö
2023-09-19 997

ȸ¿ø´ÔÀÇ ¿µÀÛ¹®

I have included in a nuclear family since I was young.
So I have never experienced the advantages and disadvantages of extended family.
I think a nuclear family is not complicated and the possibility of happening adverse events is low, because the number of family members is small.
Also, family members get enough personal space and time for refreshing.
However, sometimes family members can feel lonely in a nuclear family.
I prefer a nuclear family, but in the future I hope to live with my father, mother, my younger sister's family, and my future husband.
It will be great to live with them in a big house with good scenery.

°­»ç´ÔÀÇ Ã·»è±³Á¤ ³»¿ë

Hi there, Stella! Wow! You did really well in this homework. I only noted very simple matters regarding the sentences that you made. You are really doing great when it comes to improving the sentences you are making. I'm really happy because of that. As always, we will continue to have more practice again in the class. See you there! ~ T. Marie ^^
I have included in a nuclear family since I was young.
>> I have been included in a nuclerar family since I was young. 
So I have never experienced the advantages and disadvantages of extended family.
>> CORRECT SENTENCE
I think a nuclear family is not complicated and the possibility of happening adverse events is low, because the number of family members is small.
>> CORRECT SENTENCE
Also, family members get enough personal space and time for refreshing.
>> Also, family members get enough personal space and time to refresh
However, sometimes family members can feel lonely in a nuclear family.
>> CORRECT SENTENCE
I prefer a nuclear family, but in the future I hope to live with my father, mother, my younger sister's family, and my future husband.
>> CORRECT SENTENCE
It will be great to live with them in a big house with good scenery.
>> CORRECT SENTENCE
¹øÈ£ Á¦¸ñ ±Û¾´ÀÌ °ø°³ »óÅ µî·ÏÀÏ Á¶È¸¼ö
135632 homework ¼Õ*Èñ ¿Ï·á 2024-03-19 1490
135631 HW ³ª*Áø ¿Ï·á 2024-03-19 1531
135630 Should parents help their children plan their future? ±Ç*ÀÓ ¿Ï·á 2024-03-19 3
135629 HOMEWORK FOR 03.19.2024 WRITING TASK: What was your most... ÀÓ*Áö ¿Ï·á 2024-03-19 2
135628 What questions don¡¯t you mind people asking you? ±Ç*Áö ¿Ï·á 2024-03-19 3
135627 Homework 3/19 °í*Áø ¿Ï·á 2024-03-19 4
135626 Paying for some advice ¾ç*¿¬ ¿Ï·á 2024-03-19 1365
135625 HOMEWORK - What is a busy day like for you? How do you handle it? ÀÌ*Àº ¿Ï·á 2024-03-19 1267
135624 Body parts / ½ÅüºÎÀ§ ±è*Áø ¿Ï·á 2024-03-19 2
135623 homework ÀÓ*¹Î ¿Ï·á 2024-03-19 1429
135622 homework - what makes a person feel unsuessful? ÀÌ*Àº ¿Ï·á 2024-03-19 1544
135621 Homework ±è*¿ì ¿Ï·á 2024-03-18 0
135620 homework À¯*¸° ¿Ï·á 2024-03-18 666
135619 What do you think of people comparing themselves to others? ÀÌ*À± ¿Ï·á 2024-03-18 1181
135618 What health problems do you worry about most? ±è*¼ø ¿Ï·á 2024-03-18 854
135617 What does a busy day look like? How do you handle it? ÀÓ*È£ ¿Ï·á 2024-03-18 0
135616 Negotiation ÀÌ*±Ô ¿Ï·á 2024-03-18 1477
135615 question and homework ÀÌ*ÁÖ ¿Ï·á 2024-03-18 1561
135614 What are the things that you would/would never do for a friend? ±è*±Ô ¿Ï·á 2024-03-18 0
135613 homework 03.18 ÃÖ*Ç ¿Ï·á 2024-03-18 1141

HOW TO USE IT?

[¸¶ÀÌÆäÀÌÁö > ¼ö¾÷ ³»¿ë º¸±â > ÇнÀ Ķ¸°´õ > ¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ ¹öÆ° Ŭ¸¯]

¼ö¾÷ Ƚ¼ö¸¸Å­ ¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ °Ô½ÃÆÇÀÌ »ý¼ºµÇ¸ç,
Áö³­ ³¯Â¥¿¡µµ °Ô½Ã ÇÒ ¼ö ÀÖ½À´Ï´Ù.

ÁÖ5ȸ ¼ö¾÷ : ¿ù 20ȸ ÀÌ¿ë °¡´É
ÁÖ3ȸ ¼ö¾÷ : ¿ù 12ȸ ÀÌ¿ë °¡´É
ÁÖ2ȸ ¼ö¾÷ : ¿ù 08ȸ ÀÌ¿ë °¡´É
01
±³Á¤ ³»¿ëÀº ÃÖ´ë 1,000byte±îÁö ¿Ã¸± ¼ö ÀÖ½À´Ï´Ù.

÷ºÎ ÆÄÀÏÀº ¿øÈ°ÇÑ Ã·»èÀ» À§ÇÑ Âü°íÀÚ·á·Î »ç¿ëµÉ »Ó,
ÆÄÀÏ¿¡ ´ëÇÑ Ã·»èÀº ºÒ°¡´É ÇÕ´Ï´Ù.

¾÷·Îµå °¡´ÉÇÑ Ã·ºÎ ÆÄÀÏÀº ÃÖ´ë 2mb±îÁöÀ̸ç,
÷ºÎ ÇÒ ¼ö ÀÖ´Â ÆÄÀÏ Çü½ÄÀº ´ÙÀ½°ú °°½À´Ï´Ù.

¹®¼­ - PDF, TXT, DOCX,
À̹ÌÁö - JPEG, PNG, GIF
02
Àü¹® ºÐ¾ß¸¦ Á¦¿ÜÇÑ È¸¿ø´ÔÀÌ Á÷Á¢ ÀÛ¼ºÇÑ ±Û¸¸
÷»èÀÌ °¡´ÉÇϸç,

¿Ã·ÁÁֽŠ±ÛÀÇ °­»ç´Ô ÷»èÀº 24½Ã°£ À̳»¿¡
¿Ï·á µÇ´Â °ÍÀ» ¿øÄ¢À¸·Î ÇÏ°í ÀÖ½À´Ï´Ù.
03
ÇÏ·ç °Ô½Ã °¡´ÉÇÑ ±ÛÀº 3ȸ±îÁö À̸ç,
Á¾·áµÈ ¼ö¾÷ÀÇ ¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ °Ô½ÃÆÇÀº
ÀÌ¿ëÀÌ ¾î·Á¿î Á¡ ¾çÇØ ºÎŹ µå¸³´Ï´Ù.
04