¹«·á ·¹º§Å×½ºÆ® ¹Þ°í °­»çÆò°¡ ³²±â¸é 1,OOO¿ø ÄíÆù Áï½Ã Àû¸³!

Ȥ½Ã »çÀÌÆ®¿¡¼± ãÁö ¸øÇÑ ±Ã±ÝÇÑ Á¡ÀÌ ÀÖÀ¸¼¼¿ä?
³²°ÜÁֽŠÀ̸ÞÀÏÀ» ÅëÇØ ´äº¯ µå¸®°Ú½À´Ï´Ù.

¹®ÀÇÇϽŠ³»¿ëÀÌ ¹®ÀÚ·Î ¹ß¼ÛµÇ¿À´Ï
¿¬¶ôó¸¦ ³²°ÜÁÖ¼¼¿ä.
¾÷¹«½Ã°£ ¿ù~±Ý ¿ÀÀü9½Ã~¿ÀÈÄ6½Ã
(Á¡½É½Ã°£ ³·12½Ã~¿ÀÈÄ1½Ã)

¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ °Ô½ÃÆÇ

¿µ¾î ¸»Çϱâ¿Í ¾²±â¸¦ µ¿½Ã¿¡ Àâ´Â´Ù!

ÀڽŠÀÖ°Ô ¾µ ¼ö ÀÖ´Â ¿µÀÛ¹®À» À§ÇØ ÆÄ¿öÀ×±Û¸®½¬ ¼ö¾÷À» ¼ö°­ÇϽôÂ
ȸ¿ø´Ôµé²² ¹«·á·Î Á¦°øÇص帮´Â ºÎ°¡ ¼­ºñ½º·Î, Àü¹® ºÐ¾ß¸¦ Á¦¿ÜÇÑ ÀÚÀ¯ ÁÖÁ¦
¶Ç´Â °­»ç´ÔÀÌ ³»Áֽô °úÁ¦¸¦ ȸ¿ø´Ô²²¼­ ¿µ¾î·Î ÀÛ¼ºÇØÁֽøé,
´ã´ç °­»ç ´Ô²²¼­ ¡®¹®¹ý ¿À·ù ±³Á¤¡¯ °ú ¡®´õ ³ªÀº ¿µ¾î½Ä Ç¥Çö¡¯À¸·Î ±³Á¤ÇØÁÖ´Â
¼­ºñ½º ÀÔ´Ï´Ù.

Homework

ÀÛ¼ºÀÚ: ±è*´Ô
2023-09-17 1210

ȸ¿ø´ÔÀÇ ¿µÀÛ¹®

I wouldn¡¯t visit Taiwan again.
The food was too greasy to me .
And I had a bad memory at there.
My two friends had argument with religions and food. Until now their relationship is uncomfortable.

°­»ç´ÔÀÇ Ã·»è±³Á¤ ³»¿ë

Hello again, Ms. Sunny!
Thank you for this! I find it ridiculous that two people ruined their trips because of food and religion. We just need to respect each other's creed and not insist on what we want. Besides, no one wins in a religious argument.
have a good afternoon.
Aki~

I wouldn¡¯t visit Taiwan again.
>>> CORRECT!

The food was too greasy to me .
>>>The food was too greasy for me 

And I had a bad memory at there.
>>> And I had a bad memory there.

My two friends had argument with religions and food.
>>> My two friends had an argument about religion and food.

Until now their relationship is uncomfortable.
>>> CORRECT!
¹øÈ£ Á¦¸ñ ±Û¾´ÀÌ °ø°³ »óÅ µî·ÏÀÏ Á¶È¸¼ö
132918 homework 12.01 ÃÖ*Ç ¿Ï·á 2023-12-01 1667
132917 My recent hobby ÀÌ*¼Ö ¿Ï·á 2023-12-01 1488
132916 Parties ÀÌ*±Ô ¿Ï·á 2023-12-01 2572
132915 What is your favorite part of where you live? ¼Û*¿ì ¿Ï·á 2023-12-01 1073
132914 Homework ½Å*È­ ¿Ï·á 2023-12-01 1925
132913 Homework ½Å*È­ ¿Ï·á 2023-12-01 1921
132912 What¡¯s the worst possible meal you could imagine? ¿¡*¹Ì ¿Ï·á 2023-12-01 4
132911 HOMEWORK: Please write a short paragraph about \"Do you want to... ¾Ù* ¿Ï·á 2023-12-01 1
132910 Homework ·ù*¿ì ¿Ï·á 2023-12-01 1112
132909 homework ¾È*¿¬ ¿Ï·á 2023-12-01 2464
132908 homework Á¤*¾È ¿Ï·á 2023-12-01 0
132907 Keeping A Diary ¹Ú*À² ¿Ï·á 2023-12-01 2090
132906 homework_231130 ÇÑ*·Ï ¿Ï·á 2023-12-01 0
132905 Since caffeine and sugar, especially when taken in great amount,... ÀÌ*Èñ ¿Ï·á 2023-12-01 3152
132904 Survey ¹Ú*ÁØ ¿Ï·á 2023-12-01 2
132903 Advertising costs ¾ç*¿¬ ¿Ï·á 2023-12-01 2108
132902 In your opinion, are family gatherings necessary to do? ½Å*¼· ¿Ï·á 2023-12-01 1913
132901 About the rainy weather ±è*ºó ¿Ï·á 2023-12-01 1
132900 Homework ±Ç*¹Ì ¿Ï·á 2023-12-01 0
132899 What kind of movies do you enjoy watching with your husband? ±Ç*Áö ¿Ï·á 2023-12-01 1587

HOW TO USE IT?

[¸¶ÀÌÆäÀÌÁö > ¼ö¾÷ ³»¿ë º¸±â > ÇнÀ Ķ¸°´õ > ¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ ¹öÆ° Ŭ¸¯]

¼ö¾÷ Ƚ¼ö¸¸Å­ ¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ °Ô½ÃÆÇÀÌ »ý¼ºµÇ¸ç,
Áö³­ ³¯Â¥¿¡µµ °Ô½Ã ÇÒ ¼ö ÀÖ½À´Ï´Ù.

ÁÖ5ȸ ¼ö¾÷ : ¿ù 20ȸ ÀÌ¿ë °¡´É
ÁÖ3ȸ ¼ö¾÷ : ¿ù 12ȸ ÀÌ¿ë °¡´É
ÁÖ2ȸ ¼ö¾÷ : ¿ù 08ȸ ÀÌ¿ë °¡´É
01
±³Á¤ ³»¿ëÀº ÃÖ´ë 1,000byte±îÁö ¿Ã¸± ¼ö ÀÖ½À´Ï´Ù.

÷ºÎ ÆÄÀÏÀº ¿øÈ°ÇÑ Ã·»èÀ» À§ÇÑ Âü°íÀÚ·á·Î »ç¿ëµÉ »Ó,
ÆÄÀÏ¿¡ ´ëÇÑ Ã·»èÀº ºÒ°¡´É ÇÕ´Ï´Ù.

¾÷·Îµå °¡´ÉÇÑ Ã·ºÎ ÆÄÀÏÀº ÃÖ´ë 2mb±îÁöÀ̸ç,
÷ºÎ ÇÒ ¼ö ÀÖ´Â ÆÄÀÏ Çü½ÄÀº ´ÙÀ½°ú °°½À´Ï´Ù.

¹®¼­ - PDF, TXT, DOCX,
À̹ÌÁö - JPEG, PNG, GIF
02
Àü¹® ºÐ¾ß¸¦ Á¦¿ÜÇÑ È¸¿ø´ÔÀÌ Á÷Á¢ ÀÛ¼ºÇÑ ±Û¸¸
÷»èÀÌ °¡´ÉÇϸç,

¿Ã·ÁÁֽŠ±ÛÀÇ °­»ç´Ô ÷»èÀº 24½Ã°£ À̳»¿¡
¿Ï·á µÇ´Â °ÍÀ» ¿øÄ¢À¸·Î ÇÏ°í ÀÖ½À´Ï´Ù.
03
ÇÏ·ç °Ô½Ã °¡´ÉÇÑ ±ÛÀº 3ȸ±îÁö À̸ç,
Á¾·áµÈ ¼ö¾÷ÀÇ ¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ °Ô½ÃÆÇÀº
ÀÌ¿ëÀÌ ¾î·Á¿î Á¡ ¾çÇØ ºÎŹ µå¸³´Ï´Ù.
04