¹«·á ·¹º§Å×½ºÆ® ¹Þ°í °­»çÆò°¡ ³²±â¸é 1,OOO¿ø ÄíÆù Áï½Ã Àû¸³!

Ȥ½Ã »çÀÌÆ®¿¡¼± ãÁö ¸øÇÑ ±Ã±ÝÇÑ Á¡ÀÌ ÀÖÀ¸¼¼¿ä?
³²°ÜÁֽŠÀ̸ÞÀÏÀ» ÅëÇØ ´äº¯ µå¸®°Ú½À´Ï´Ù.

¹®ÀÇÇϽŠ³»¿ëÀÌ ¹®ÀÚ·Î ¹ß¼ÛµÇ¿À´Ï
¿¬¶ôó¸¦ ³²°ÜÁÖ¼¼¿ä.
¾÷¹«½Ã°£ ¿ù~±Ý ¿ÀÀü9½Ã~¿ÀÈÄ6½Ã
(Á¡½É½Ã°£ ³·12½Ã~¿ÀÈÄ1½Ã)

¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ °Ô½ÃÆÇ

¿µ¾î ¸»Çϱâ¿Í ¾²±â¸¦ µ¿½Ã¿¡ Àâ´Â´Ù!

ÀڽŠÀÖ°Ô ¾µ ¼ö ÀÖ´Â ¿µÀÛ¹®À» À§ÇØ ÆÄ¿öÀ×±Û¸®½¬ ¼ö¾÷À» ¼ö°­ÇϽôÂ
ȸ¿ø´Ôµé²² ¹«·á·Î Á¦°øÇص帮´Â ºÎ°¡ ¼­ºñ½º·Î, Àü¹® ºÐ¾ß¸¦ Á¦¿ÜÇÑ ÀÚÀ¯ ÁÖÁ¦
¶Ç´Â °­»ç´ÔÀÌ ³»Áֽô °úÁ¦¸¦ ȸ¿ø´Ô²²¼­ ¿µ¾î·Î ÀÛ¼ºÇØÁֽøé,
´ã´ç °­»ç ´Ô²²¼­ ¡®¹®¹ý ¿À·ù ±³Á¤¡¯ °ú ¡®´õ ³ªÀº ¿µ¾î½Ä Ç¥Çö¡¯À¸·Î ±³Á¤ÇØÁÖ´Â
¼­ºñ½º ÀÔ´Ï´Ù.

What¡¯s the worst natural disaster in your opinion?

ÀÛ¼ºÀÚ: ÀÌ*¹Î
2023-09-16 1472

ȸ¿ø´ÔÀÇ ¿µÀÛ¹®

I think flood is the worst natural disaster. In our country at this summer, here had many disaster. Because cause of flood is environment problems. These day the earth has hot, so melt ice in the south pole.
In other case, our country have many basement house in Seoul. Because their is more than cheaper other apartments. because of the flood, they were died at last summer.
So the worst natural disaster is flood.

°­»ç´ÔÀÇ Ã·»è±³Á¤ ³»¿ë

Hello Su,

I appreciate your homework discussing floods, and it reminded me of the recent incident in Korea. Your effort in addressing this topic is commendable, and your writing is improving. Keep up the good work, and stay motivated in your English studies. I'm here to support you

~Teacher Cathy

 

I think flood is the worst natural disaster.

>>I think a flood is the worst natural disaster.

In our country at this summer, here had many disaster. Because cause of flood is environment problems.

>>In our country, this summer, we experienced many disasters because the cause of floods is environmental problems.

These day the earth has hot, so melt ice in the south pole.

>> These days, the Earth has been hot, causing the ice in the South Pole to melt.

In other case, our country have many basement house in Seoul. Because their is more than cheaper other apartments. because of the flood, they were died at last summer.

>> In another case, our country has many basement houses in Seoul because they are cheaper than other apartments. Due to the floods, some people lost their lives last summer.

So the worst natural disaster is flood.

>> Therefore, the worst natural disaster is a flood.

¹øÈ£ Á¦¸ñ ±Û¾´ÀÌ °ø°³ »óÅ µî·ÏÀÏ Á¶È¸¼ö
134285 What\'s one thing you\'re hoping to achieve this weekend? À±*¿ø ¿Ï·á 2024-01-29 0
134284 How to work effectively ±è*¿ì ¿Ï·á 2024-01-29 0
134283 Which one do you prefer iPhone or Samsung and why? ¼Û*¿ì ¿Ï·á 2024-01-29 987
134282 Homework ±è*¿ì ¿Ï·á 2024-01-29 656
134281 If there is any improvement your city can do to make public... õ*Àº ¿Ï·á 2024-01-29 1567
134280 Homework Àå*Çõ ¿Ï·á 2024-01-29 1293
134279 experience ¹Î*Á¤ ¿Ï·á 2024-01-29 1
134278 homework Á¤*È£ ¿Ï·á 2024-01-29 0
134277 Homework do*eun ¿Ï·á 2024-01-29 1238
134276 essay 11 ¼Û*½Â ¿Ï·á 2024-01-29 1191
134275 Homework ·ù*¿ì ¿Ï·á 2024-01-29 1732
134274 I want to live in Canada or Australia. À±*Çý ¿Ï·á 2024-01-29 1304
134273 A movie with a little comedy added to the c-list documentary. À±*Çý ¿Ï·á 2024-01-29 1567
134272 Why do we use the computer? ¹Ú*Çö ¿Ï·á 2024-01-29 1642
134271 Homework À±*¼± ¿Ï·á 2024-01-29 1445
134270 A Happy life °í*È£ ¿Ï·á 2024-01-29 1503
134269 Homework ¹Ú*Çý ¿Ï·á 2024-01-29 1080
134268 Who is always there to help you when you need it badly? ±Ç*ÀÓ ¿Ï·á 2024-01-29 1
134267 How long should we be having our conversation with friends Why? ÀÓ*Áö ¿Ï·á 2024-01-29 8
134266 homework ±è*¸° ¿Ï·á 2024-01-29 1

HOW TO USE IT?

[¸¶ÀÌÆäÀÌÁö > ¼ö¾÷ ³»¿ë º¸±â > ÇнÀ Ķ¸°´õ > ¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ ¹öÆ° Ŭ¸¯]

¼ö¾÷ Ƚ¼ö¸¸Å­ ¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ °Ô½ÃÆÇÀÌ »ý¼ºµÇ¸ç,
Áö³­ ³¯Â¥¿¡µµ °Ô½Ã ÇÒ ¼ö ÀÖ½À´Ï´Ù.

ÁÖ5ȸ ¼ö¾÷ : ¿ù 20ȸ ÀÌ¿ë °¡´É
ÁÖ3ȸ ¼ö¾÷ : ¿ù 12ȸ ÀÌ¿ë °¡´É
ÁÖ2ȸ ¼ö¾÷ : ¿ù 08ȸ ÀÌ¿ë °¡´É
01
±³Á¤ ³»¿ëÀº ÃÖ´ë 1,000byte±îÁö ¿Ã¸± ¼ö ÀÖ½À´Ï´Ù.

÷ºÎ ÆÄÀÏÀº ¿øÈ°ÇÑ Ã·»èÀ» À§ÇÑ Âü°íÀÚ·á·Î »ç¿ëµÉ »Ó,
ÆÄÀÏ¿¡ ´ëÇÑ Ã·»èÀº ºÒ°¡´É ÇÕ´Ï´Ù.

¾÷·Îµå °¡´ÉÇÑ Ã·ºÎ ÆÄÀÏÀº ÃÖ´ë 2mb±îÁöÀ̸ç,
÷ºÎ ÇÒ ¼ö ÀÖ´Â ÆÄÀÏ Çü½ÄÀº ´ÙÀ½°ú °°½À´Ï´Ù.

¹®¼­ - PDF, TXT, DOCX,
À̹ÌÁö - JPEG, PNG, GIF
02
Àü¹® ºÐ¾ß¸¦ Á¦¿ÜÇÑ È¸¿ø´ÔÀÌ Á÷Á¢ ÀÛ¼ºÇÑ ±Û¸¸
÷»èÀÌ °¡´ÉÇϸç,

¿Ã·ÁÁֽŠ±ÛÀÇ °­»ç´Ô ÷»èÀº 24½Ã°£ À̳»¿¡
¿Ï·á µÇ´Â °ÍÀ» ¿øÄ¢À¸·Î ÇÏ°í ÀÖ½À´Ï´Ù.
03
ÇÏ·ç °Ô½Ã °¡´ÉÇÑ ±ÛÀº 3ȸ±îÁö À̸ç,
Á¾·áµÈ ¼ö¾÷ÀÇ ¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ °Ô½ÃÆÇÀº
ÀÌ¿ëÀÌ ¾î·Á¿î Á¡ ¾çÇØ ºÎŹ µå¸³´Ï´Ù.
04