¹«·á ·¹º§Å×½ºÆ® ¹Þ°í °­»çÆò°¡ ³²±â¸é 1,OOO¿ø ÄíÆù Áï½Ã Àû¸³!

Ȥ½Ã »çÀÌÆ®¿¡¼± ãÁö ¸øÇÑ ±Ã±ÝÇÑ Á¡ÀÌ ÀÖÀ¸¼¼¿ä?
³²°ÜÁֽŠÀ̸ÞÀÏÀ» ÅëÇØ ´äº¯ µå¸®°Ú½À´Ï´Ù.

¹®ÀÇÇϽŠ³»¿ëÀÌ ¹®ÀÚ·Î ¹ß¼ÛµÇ¿À´Ï
¿¬¶ôó¸¦ ³²°ÜÁÖ¼¼¿ä.
¾÷¹«½Ã°£ ¿ù~±Ý ¿ÀÀü9½Ã~¿ÀÈÄ6½Ã
(Á¡½É½Ã°£ ³·12½Ã~¿ÀÈÄ1½Ã)

¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ °Ô½ÃÆÇ

¿µ¾î ¸»Çϱâ¿Í ¾²±â¸¦ µ¿½Ã¿¡ Àâ´Â´Ù!

ÀڽŠÀÖ°Ô ¾µ ¼ö ÀÖ´Â ¿µÀÛ¹®À» À§ÇØ ÆÄ¿öÀ×±Û¸®½¬ ¼ö¾÷À» ¼ö°­ÇϽôÂ
ȸ¿ø´Ôµé²² ¹«·á·Î Á¦°øÇص帮´Â ºÎ°¡ ¼­ºñ½º·Î, Àü¹® ºÐ¾ß¸¦ Á¦¿ÜÇÑ ÀÚÀ¯ ÁÖÁ¦
¶Ç´Â °­»ç´ÔÀÌ ³»Áֽô °úÁ¦¸¦ ȸ¿ø´Ô²²¼­ ¿µ¾î·Î ÀÛ¼ºÇØÁֽøé,
´ã´ç °­»ç ´Ô²²¼­ ¡®¹®¹ý ¿À·ù ±³Á¤¡¯ °ú ¡®´õ ³ªÀº ¿µ¾î½Ä Ç¥Çö¡¯À¸·Î ±³Á¤ÇØÁÖ´Â
¼­ºñ½º ÀÔ´Ï´Ù.

How to help them

ÀÛ¼ºÀÚ: ¼º*°æ
2023-09-13 1242

ȸ¿ø´ÔÀÇ ¿µÀÛ¹®

Umm,,,i¡¯m sorry to hear that story. The most necessary thing for them is money. The most common way to earn money is working but there are no person who work extra hours. So i think to raise the money for them is the best way to help them. I as normal person don¡¯t have a lot of money to help them. But if people like me gather and donate to them a mall amount money, they can stand their feet on.

There is saying that don¡¯t give starving man fish instead teach how to catch a fish. Even though donating money for them is important, we have to teach how to earn money from work.

°­»ç´ÔÀÇ Ã·»è±³Á¤ ³»¿ë

Your opinions were expressed well, Jun! I also believe that when helping, we should help wisely and practically.
-Faith-
Umm,,,i¡¯m sorry to hear that story. 
>> I feel sorry to hear that story. 
The most necessary thing for them is money. 
>> CORRECT
The most common way to earn money is working but there are no person who work extra hours. So i think to raise the money for them is the best way to help them. 
>> The most common way to earn money is by working, but there are no people who work extra hours, so raising money for them is the best way to help them. 
I as normal person don¡¯t have a lot of money to help them. But if people like me gather and donate to them a mall amount money, they can stand their feet on.
>> I, as a normal person, do not have a lot of money to help them, but if people like me gather a small amount of money to donate to them, they can get back on their feet.
There is saying that don¡¯t give starving man fish instead teach how to catch a fish. 
>> There is a saying that we should not give a starving man fish, instead teach them how to catch fish. 
Even though donating money for them is important, we have to teach how to earn money from work.
>> Even though donating money to them is important, we have to teach them how to earn money from work.
¹øÈ£ Á¦¸ñ ±Û¾´ÀÌ °ø°³ »óÅ µî·ÏÀÏ Á¶È¸¼ö
128705 Disagree. ¹Î*Á¤ ¿Ï·á 2023-06-07 2
128704 Homework ½Å*È­ ¿Ï·á 2023-06-07 1080
128703 Writing task ¾È*Çü ¿Ï·á 2023-06-07 929
128702 To take care of the health ÃÖ*ȯ ¿Ï·á 2023-06-07 1121
128701 scam ±Ç*Èñ ¿Ï·á 2023-06-07 738
128700 Homework ¿À*ºó ¿Ï·á 2023-06-07 0
128699 Do you think sleep is important? ÀÓ*È£ ¿Ï·á 2023-06-07 0
128698 A good horror movie! ±è*À± ¿Ï·á 2023-06-07 1064
128697 What could be your advice for people who are suffering from... ±è*°æ ¿Ï·á 2023-06-07 1219
128696 How do you deal with a busy schedule? Do you usually finish... ±è*¿ø ¿Ï·á 2023-06-07 1456
128695 Do you think sleep is important? Why or why not? ±è*°æ ¿Ï·á 2023-06-07 825
128694 Bring some stuff for hiking ÃÖ*ȯ ¿Ï·á 2023-06-06 840
128693 homework ±è*¿¬ ¿Ï·á 2023-06-06 834
128692 Homework ±è*¿ì ¿Ï·á 2023-06-06 1581
128691 homework 06.06 ÃÖ*Ç ¿Ï·á 2023-06-06 683
128690 Home work Á¶* ¿Ï·á 2023-06-06 1530
128689 What advice would you give the leader of your country? ¹Ú*³ª ¿Ï·á 2023-06-06 1088
128688 What questions would you like to ask the fraud expert? ±è*¹Î ¿Ï·á 2023-06-06 4
128687 The fruit that I dislike ¼Û*¿ì ¿Ï·á 2023-06-06 937
128686 What is your favorite day and why? ¹Ú*Çö ¿Ï·á 2023-06-06 821

HOW TO USE IT?

[¸¶ÀÌÆäÀÌÁö > ¼ö¾÷ ³»¿ë º¸±â > ÇнÀ Ķ¸°´õ > ¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ ¹öÆ° Ŭ¸¯]

¼ö¾÷ Ƚ¼ö¸¸Å­ ¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ °Ô½ÃÆÇÀÌ »ý¼ºµÇ¸ç,
Áö³­ ³¯Â¥¿¡µµ °Ô½Ã ÇÒ ¼ö ÀÖ½À´Ï´Ù.

ÁÖ5ȸ ¼ö¾÷ : ¿ù 20ȸ ÀÌ¿ë °¡´É
ÁÖ3ȸ ¼ö¾÷ : ¿ù 12ȸ ÀÌ¿ë °¡´É
ÁÖ2ȸ ¼ö¾÷ : ¿ù 08ȸ ÀÌ¿ë °¡´É
01
±³Á¤ ³»¿ëÀº ÃÖ´ë 1,000byte±îÁö ¿Ã¸± ¼ö ÀÖ½À´Ï´Ù.

÷ºÎ ÆÄÀÏÀº ¿øÈ°ÇÑ Ã·»èÀ» À§ÇÑ Âü°íÀÚ·á·Î »ç¿ëµÉ »Ó,
ÆÄÀÏ¿¡ ´ëÇÑ Ã·»èÀº ºÒ°¡´É ÇÕ´Ï´Ù.

¾÷·Îµå °¡´ÉÇÑ Ã·ºÎ ÆÄÀÏÀº ÃÖ´ë 2mb±îÁöÀ̸ç,
÷ºÎ ÇÒ ¼ö ÀÖ´Â ÆÄÀÏ Çü½ÄÀº ´ÙÀ½°ú °°½À´Ï´Ù.

¹®¼­ - PDF, TXT, DOCX,
À̹ÌÁö - JPEG, PNG, GIF
02
Àü¹® ºÐ¾ß¸¦ Á¦¿ÜÇÑ È¸¿ø´ÔÀÌ Á÷Á¢ ÀÛ¼ºÇÑ ±Û¸¸
÷»èÀÌ °¡´ÉÇϸç,

¿Ã·ÁÁֽŠ±ÛÀÇ °­»ç´Ô ÷»èÀº 24½Ã°£ À̳»¿¡
¿Ï·á µÇ´Â °ÍÀ» ¿øÄ¢À¸·Î ÇÏ°í ÀÖ½À´Ï´Ù.
03
ÇÏ·ç °Ô½Ã °¡´ÉÇÑ ±ÛÀº 3ȸ±îÁö À̸ç,
Á¾·áµÈ ¼ö¾÷ÀÇ ¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ °Ô½ÃÆÇÀº
ÀÌ¿ëÀÌ ¾î·Á¿î Á¡ ¾çÇØ ºÎŹ µå¸³´Ï´Ù.
04