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자신 있게 쓸 수 있는 영작문을 위해 파워잉글리쉬 수업을 수강하시는
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담당 강사 님께서 ‘문법 오류 교정’ 과 ‘더 나은 영어식 표현’으로 교정해주는
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Homework

작성자: 김*우
2023-09-12 717

회원님의 영작문

Hello.
My wife and I are having a hard time.
Since we drank much water including a medicine which cleans a GI tract, we go to a toilet every 30 minutes.
This is a bowel preperation for colonosopy.
Maybe, we won't sleep well.
Someday, you will have this experience, I hope.
Anyway, there was nothing special at the clinic.
Since today is a day off for Dr. MJ, I didn't talk with him.
After the previous arguement, he didn't express any emotion to me.
He just tried to contact me about work, and it was not bad than expected.
We are cautious about each other, and this situation will develop our relationship better.
I will overcome this discomfort soon.
Regarding my homework, I am both a leader and a follower.
As you know, I am empathetic and confident about sharing other's minds.
I've taken a leader position in many relationships.
However, as I am getting older, I became a man who prefers a follower.
Follower can devleop himself by following a leader, and it has lower pressure.
See you.

강사님의 첨삭교정 내용

Hi, Dr. Kim!

By now, you are taking your annual medical check up and taking the various procedures step by step. Your country is so fortunate to have these medical benefits compared to many countries in the world. If this one's available in our country, I would have found out by now some of the diseases I have. ^^

Anyway, discomfort may be for a short while but the benefits can last for a lifetime. I hope that there would never be anything wrong with your health upon the release of the tests and procedures.

Regarding Dr. MJ, we can determine his reservation as a sign of professional maturity lately. Since some of his ways may be too strong for you and your staff, a slight shift to a more pragmatic and respectful communication will go a long way and eventually, bring more profit to your clinic. This is everybody's  wish in your work, I guess.

Lastly, being a follower is more convenient and comfortable compared to being a leader. We already know that the leader is prone to risks and responsibilities, hence, he needs to think critically all the time. Since you are a leader and a follower at the same time, you can balance these duties and yield the best results with the help of your excellent empathy.

Then, well done with your grammar on this homework! study the underlined suggestions carefully.

I will see you again tomorrow.

-T. Donna~

Hello.
>> Correct!

My wife and I are having a hard time.
>> Correct!

Since we drank much water including a medicine which cleans a GI tract, we go to a toilet every 30 minutes.
>> Since we drank much water including a medicine which cleans a GI tract, we go to the toilet every 30 minutes.

This is a bowel preperation for colonosopy.
>> Correct!
Or: This is a bowel preparation for colonoscopy.

Maybe, we won't sleep well.
>> Correct!

Someday, you will have this experience, I hope.
>> Correct!

Anyway, there was nothing special at the clinic.
>> Correct!

Since today is a day off for Dr. MJ, I didn't talk with him.
>> Since today is the day off for Dr. MJ, I didn't talk with him.

After the previous arguement, he didn't express any emotion to me.
>> Correct!
Or: argument

He just tried to contact me about work, and it was not bad than expected.
>> Correct!

We are cautious about each other, and this situation will develop our relationship better.
>> Correct!

I will overcome this discomfort soon.
>> Correct!

Regarding my homework, I am both a leader and a follower.
>> Correct!

As you know, I am empathetic and confident about sharing other's minds.
>> Correct!
Or: others'

I've taken a leader position in many relationships.
>> Correct!

However, as I am getting older, I became a man who prefers a follower.
>> However, as I am getting older, I became a man who prefers being a follower.

Follower can devleop himself by following a leader, and it has lower pressure.
>> A follower can develop himself by following a leader, and it has a lower pressure.

See you.
>> Correct!

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