¹«·á ·¹º§Å×½ºÆ® ¹Þ°í °­»çÆò°¡ ³²±â¸é 1,OOO¿ø ÄíÆù Áï½Ã Àû¸³!

Ȥ½Ã »çÀÌÆ®¿¡¼± ãÁö ¸øÇÑ ±Ã±ÝÇÑ Á¡ÀÌ ÀÖÀ¸¼¼¿ä?
³²°ÜÁֽŠÀ̸ÞÀÏÀ» ÅëÇØ ´äº¯ µå¸®°Ú½À´Ï´Ù.

¹®ÀÇÇϽŠ³»¿ëÀÌ ¹®ÀÚ·Î ¹ß¼ÛµÇ¿À´Ï
¿¬¶ôó¸¦ ³²°ÜÁÖ¼¼¿ä.
¾÷¹«½Ã°£ ¿ù~±Ý ¿ÀÀü9½Ã~¿ÀÈÄ6½Ã
(Á¡½É½Ã°£ ³·12½Ã~¿ÀÈÄ1½Ã)

¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ °Ô½ÃÆÇ

¿µ¾î ¸»Çϱâ¿Í ¾²±â¸¦ µ¿½Ã¿¡ Àâ´Â´Ù!

ÀڽŠÀÖ°Ô ¾µ ¼ö ÀÖ´Â ¿µÀÛ¹®À» À§ÇØ ÆÄ¿öÀ×±Û¸®½¬ ¼ö¾÷À» ¼ö°­ÇϽôÂ
ȸ¿ø´Ôµé²² ¹«·á·Î Á¦°øÇص帮´Â ºÎ°¡ ¼­ºñ½º·Î, Àü¹® ºÐ¾ß¸¦ Á¦¿ÜÇÑ ÀÚÀ¯ ÁÖÁ¦
¶Ç´Â °­»ç´ÔÀÌ ³»Áֽô °úÁ¦¸¦ ȸ¿ø´Ô²²¼­ ¿µ¾î·Î ÀÛ¼ºÇØÁֽøé,
´ã´ç °­»ç ´Ô²²¼­ ¡®¹®¹ý ¿À·ù ±³Á¤¡¯ °ú ¡®´õ ³ªÀº ¿µ¾î½Ä Ç¥Çö¡¯À¸·Î ±³Á¤ÇØÁÖ´Â
¼­ºñ½º ÀÔ´Ï´Ù.

Today\'s homework

ÀÛ¼ºÀÚ: ÀÌ*µµ
2023-09-06 1047

ȸ¿ø´ÔÀÇ ¿µÀÛ¹®

ESSAY: Although parents are responsible for raising a child, outside influence plays a key role in their development. To what extent do you agree or disagree

factor of outside impacts children's growing. But the most important thing i think is the attention of parents.
parent's expression gives mant impact they children. they must not release there feeling to children.
if they are swayed by emotions, children can't choose right action and he or she can't grow social relationship.
children's relationship affect their life. people who don't give education may become criminal.

°­»ç´ÔÀÇ Ã·»è±³Á¤ ³»¿ë

Hello Lee! How are you? Well, today is a special day because it's my birthday. Hahaha! I don't have any plans yet. Talk to you tomorrow. Take care!
>>> TEACHER GEMMA 
factor of outside impacts children's growing. 
>>> Children's development is impacted by external factors.
But the most important thing i think is the attention of parents.
>>> However, the most important thing is the parents' attention. 
parent's expression gives mant impact they children.
>>> The way parents act has a big impact on their children. 
 they must not release there feeling to children.
>>> They should not be so emotional in front of their children.
if they are swayed by emotions, children can't choose right action and he or she can't grow social relationship.
>>> Children cannot make moral decisions or develop healthy social relationships if they are influenced by their parents' emotions.
children's relationship affect their life. 
>>> Children's social relationship can affect their lives. 
people who don't give education may become criminal.
>>> Parents who don't educate their children well may turn to criminals someday.  
¹øÈ£ Á¦¸ñ ±Û¾´ÀÌ °ø°³ »óÅ µî·ÏÀÏ Á¶È¸¼ö
130531 way to speak english well ±è*¹Ì ¿Ï·á 2023-08-28 5
130530 homwork ¹Ú*ÁØ ¿Ï·á 2023-08-28 3
130529 What kinds of people do you want to meet? ±è*±Ô ¿Ï·á 2023-08-27 1
130528 Homework Á¤*Çõ ¿Ï·á 2023-08-27 1927
130527 Homework ±è*¿ì ¿Ï·á 2023-08-27 882
130526 Is it always wrong to argue with the elderly? ±è*±¹ ¿Ï·á 2023-08-26 5
130525 Homework ±è*´Ô ¿Ï·á 2023-08-26 995
130524 What are the laws in your country regarding garbage? ±è*±¹ ¿Ï·á 2023-08-26 1
130523 Which one is more important? Physical or mental health? ¼Û*ÇÏ ¿Ï·á 2023-08-26 1814
130522 What\'s the difference between working abroad vs. in your... ½Å*¼· ¿Ï·á 2023-08-26 1378
130521 Are there any activities that you used to do but don¡¯t do... Á¶*¹Î ¿Ï·á 2023-08-26 1
130520 homework Á¶*ÁØ ¿Ï·á 2023-08-26 1505
130519 homework Á¶*ÁØ ¿Ï·á 2023-08-26 1537
130518 Hi, Mayleen! °­*Á¤ ¿Ï·á 2023-08-26 0
130517 Where would you like to go for an adventure? ÀÌ*À± ¿Ï·á 2023-08-26 2043
130516 Today\'s homework ÀÌ*µµ ¿Ï·á 2023-08-25 1310
130515 homework ±è*¼­ ¿Ï·á 2023-08-25 3
130514 HOMEWORK ±è*¶õ ¿Ï·á 2023-08-25 0
130513 Keep our body healthy! ±è*À± ¿Ï·á 2023-08-25 2353
130512 homework ±è*¿¬ ¿Ï·á 2023-08-25 1383

HOW TO USE IT?

[¸¶ÀÌÆäÀÌÁö > ¼ö¾÷ ³»¿ë º¸±â > ÇнÀ Ķ¸°´õ > ¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ ¹öÆ° Ŭ¸¯]

¼ö¾÷ Ƚ¼ö¸¸Å­ ¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ °Ô½ÃÆÇÀÌ »ý¼ºµÇ¸ç,
Áö³­ ³¯Â¥¿¡µµ °Ô½Ã ÇÒ ¼ö ÀÖ½À´Ï´Ù.

ÁÖ5ȸ ¼ö¾÷ : ¿ù 20ȸ ÀÌ¿ë °¡´É
ÁÖ3ȸ ¼ö¾÷ : ¿ù 12ȸ ÀÌ¿ë °¡´É
ÁÖ2ȸ ¼ö¾÷ : ¿ù 08ȸ ÀÌ¿ë °¡´É
01
±³Á¤ ³»¿ëÀº ÃÖ´ë 1,000byte±îÁö ¿Ã¸± ¼ö ÀÖ½À´Ï´Ù.

÷ºÎ ÆÄÀÏÀº ¿øÈ°ÇÑ Ã·»èÀ» À§ÇÑ Âü°íÀÚ·á·Î »ç¿ëµÉ »Ó,
ÆÄÀÏ¿¡ ´ëÇÑ Ã·»èÀº ºÒ°¡´É ÇÕ´Ï´Ù.

¾÷·Îµå °¡´ÉÇÑ Ã·ºÎ ÆÄÀÏÀº ÃÖ´ë 2mb±îÁöÀ̸ç,
÷ºÎ ÇÒ ¼ö ÀÖ´Â ÆÄÀÏ Çü½ÄÀº ´ÙÀ½°ú °°½À´Ï´Ù.

¹®¼­ - PDF, TXT, DOCX,
À̹ÌÁö - JPEG, PNG, GIF
02
Àü¹® ºÐ¾ß¸¦ Á¦¿ÜÇÑ È¸¿ø´ÔÀÌ Á÷Á¢ ÀÛ¼ºÇÑ ±Û¸¸
÷»èÀÌ °¡´ÉÇϸç,

¿Ã·ÁÁֽŠ±ÛÀÇ °­»ç´Ô ÷»èÀº 24½Ã°£ À̳»¿¡
¿Ï·á µÇ´Â °ÍÀ» ¿øÄ¢À¸·Î ÇÏ°í ÀÖ½À´Ï´Ù.
03
ÇÏ·ç °Ô½Ã °¡´ÉÇÑ ±ÛÀº 3ȸ±îÁö À̸ç,
Á¾·áµÈ ¼ö¾÷ÀÇ ¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ °Ô½ÃÆÇÀº
ÀÌ¿ëÀÌ ¾î·Á¿î Á¡ ¾çÇØ ºÎŹ µå¸³´Ï´Ù.
04