¹«·á ·¹º§Å×½ºÆ® ¹Þ°í °­»çÆò°¡ ³²±â¸é 1,OOO¿ø ÄíÆù Áï½Ã Àû¸³!

Ȥ½Ã »çÀÌÆ®¿¡¼± ãÁö ¸øÇÑ ±Ã±ÝÇÑ Á¡ÀÌ ÀÖÀ¸¼¼¿ä?
³²°ÜÁֽŠÀ̸ÞÀÏÀ» ÅëÇØ ´äº¯ µå¸®°Ú½À´Ï´Ù.

¹®ÀÇÇϽŠ³»¿ëÀÌ ¹®ÀÚ·Î ¹ß¼ÛµÇ¿À´Ï
¿¬¶ôó¸¦ ³²°ÜÁÖ¼¼¿ä.
¾÷¹«½Ã°£ ¿ù~±Ý ¿ÀÀü9½Ã~¿ÀÈÄ6½Ã
(Á¡½É½Ã°£ ³·12½Ã~¿ÀÈÄ1½Ã)

¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ °Ô½ÃÆÇ

¿µ¾î ¸»Çϱâ¿Í ¾²±â¸¦ µ¿½Ã¿¡ Àâ´Â´Ù!

ÀڽŠÀÖ°Ô ¾µ ¼ö ÀÖ´Â ¿µÀÛ¹®À» À§ÇØ ÆÄ¿öÀ×±Û¸®½¬ ¼ö¾÷À» ¼ö°­ÇϽôÂ
ȸ¿ø´Ôµé²² ¹«·á·Î Á¦°øÇص帮´Â ºÎ°¡ ¼­ºñ½º·Î, Àü¹® ºÐ¾ß¸¦ Á¦¿ÜÇÑ ÀÚÀ¯ ÁÖÁ¦
¶Ç´Â °­»ç´ÔÀÌ ³»Áֽô °úÁ¦¸¦ ȸ¿ø´Ô²²¼­ ¿µ¾î·Î ÀÛ¼ºÇØÁֽøé,
´ã´ç °­»ç ´Ô²²¼­ ¡®¹®¹ý ¿À·ù ±³Á¤¡¯ °ú ¡®´õ ³ªÀº ¿µ¾î½Ä Ç¥Çö¡¯À¸·Î ±³Á¤ÇØÁÖ´Â
¼­ºñ½º ÀÔ´Ï´Ù.

Today\'s homework

ÀÛ¼ºÀÚ: ÀÌ*µµ
2023-09-06 510

ȸ¿ø´ÔÀÇ ¿µÀÛ¹®

ESSAY: Although parents are responsible for raising a child, outside influence plays a key role in their development. To what extent do you agree or disagree

factor of outside impacts children's growing. But the most important thing i think is the attention of parents.
parent's expression gives mant impact they children. they must not release there feeling to children.
if they are swayed by emotions, children can't choose right action and he or she can't grow social relationship.
children's relationship affect their life. people who don't give education may become criminal.

°­»ç´ÔÀÇ Ã·»è±³Á¤ ³»¿ë

Hello Lee! How are you? Well, today is a special day because it's my birthday. Hahaha! I don't have any plans yet. Talk to you tomorrow. Take care!
>>> TEACHER GEMMA 
factor of outside impacts children's growing. 
>>> Children's development is impacted by external factors.
But the most important thing i think is the attention of parents.
>>> However, the most important thing is the parents' attention. 
parent's expression gives mant impact they children.
>>> The way parents act has a big impact on their children. 
 they must not release there feeling to children.
>>> They should not be so emotional in front of their children.
if they are swayed by emotions, children can't choose right action and he or she can't grow social relationship.
>>> Children cannot make moral decisions or develop healthy social relationships if they are influenced by their parents' emotions.
children's relationship affect their life. 
>>> Children's social relationship can affect their lives. 
people who don't give education may become criminal.
>>> Parents who don't educate their children well may turn to criminals someday.  
¹øÈ£ Á¦¸ñ ±Û¾´ÀÌ °ø°³ »óÅ µî·ÏÀÏ Á¶È¸¼ö
132557 which activities do you think you still need to work on... Á¤*ȯ ¿Ï·á 2023-11-20 729
132556 What are the disadvantages of rote learning? Á¶*Áö ¿Ï·á 2023-11-20 0
132555 Debate competitiom ±è*¹Î ¿Ï·á 2023-11-20 1315
132554 Letter ¹Ú*ÁØ ¿Ï·á 2023-11-20 1
132553 My two best friends °­*À² ¿Ï·á 2023-11-19 1
132552 Snow ÀÌ*À± ¿Ï·á 2023-11-19 1269
132551 If you could eat only one food for the rest of your life, what... ÀÌ*ºó ¿Ï·á 2023-11-19 1704
132550 What kind of boss would you want to be if you had your own... ÀÌ*ºó ¿Ï·á 2023-11-19 1227
132549 H.W-What is the importance of friendship? ±Ç*Èñ ¿Ï·á 2023-11-19 984
132548 persuade a client or coworker to go in a different direction. ±Ç*Áö ¿Ï·á 2023-11-19 1493
132547 My weekend activities ÀÌ*¼º ¿Ï·á 2023-11-19 4
132546 Question ¿À*º½ ¿Ï·á 2023-11-19 7
132545 What do you usually do after school? ÃÖ*ÇÑ ¿Ï·á 2023-11-19 1572
132544 Are volunteer works special? ±è*±¹ ¿Ï·á 2023-11-19 2
132543 Diary ±è*¿¬ ¿Ï·á 2023-11-19 2
132542 Diary ±è*¿¬ ¿Ï·á 2023-11-18 2
132541 In your opinion, it it easy to change bad habits? ½Å*¼· ¿Ï·á 2023-11-18 916
132540 Homework : unit 7 ¹Ú*³ª ¿Ï·á 2023-11-18 6
132539 HOMEWORK: Please write a short paragraph about \"What is your... ¾Ù* ¿Ï·á 2023-11-18 3
132538 What¡¯s the biggest adventure you¡¯ve had in your life? À±*¿ø ¿Ï·á 2023-11-18 1

HOW TO USE IT?

[¸¶ÀÌÆäÀÌÁö > ¼ö¾÷ ³»¿ë º¸±â > ÇнÀ Ķ¸°´õ > ¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ ¹öÆ° Ŭ¸¯]

¼ö¾÷ Ƚ¼ö¸¸Å­ ¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ °Ô½ÃÆÇÀÌ »ý¼ºµÇ¸ç,
Áö³­ ³¯Â¥¿¡µµ °Ô½Ã ÇÒ ¼ö ÀÖ½À´Ï´Ù.

ÁÖ5ȸ ¼ö¾÷ : ¿ù 20ȸ ÀÌ¿ë °¡´É
ÁÖ3ȸ ¼ö¾÷ : ¿ù 12ȸ ÀÌ¿ë °¡´É
ÁÖ2ȸ ¼ö¾÷ : ¿ù 08ȸ ÀÌ¿ë °¡´É
01
±³Á¤ ³»¿ëÀº ÃÖ´ë 1,000byte±îÁö ¿Ã¸± ¼ö ÀÖ½À´Ï´Ù.

÷ºÎ ÆÄÀÏÀº ¿øÈ°ÇÑ Ã·»èÀ» À§ÇÑ Âü°íÀÚ·á·Î »ç¿ëµÉ »Ó,
ÆÄÀÏ¿¡ ´ëÇÑ Ã·»èÀº ºÒ°¡´É ÇÕ´Ï´Ù.

¾÷·Îµå °¡´ÉÇÑ Ã·ºÎ ÆÄÀÏÀº ÃÖ´ë 2mb±îÁöÀ̸ç,
÷ºÎ ÇÒ ¼ö ÀÖ´Â ÆÄÀÏ Çü½ÄÀº ´ÙÀ½°ú °°½À´Ï´Ù.

¹®¼­ - PDF, TXT, DOCX,
À̹ÌÁö - JPEG, PNG, GIF
02
Àü¹® ºÐ¾ß¸¦ Á¦¿ÜÇÑ È¸¿ø´ÔÀÌ Á÷Á¢ ÀÛ¼ºÇÑ ±Û¸¸
÷»èÀÌ °¡´ÉÇϸç,

¿Ã·ÁÁֽŠ±ÛÀÇ °­»ç´Ô ÷»èÀº 24½Ã°£ À̳»¿¡
¿Ï·á µÇ´Â °ÍÀ» ¿øÄ¢À¸·Î ÇÏ°í ÀÖ½À´Ï´Ù.
03
ÇÏ·ç °Ô½Ã °¡´ÉÇÑ ±ÛÀº 3ȸ±îÁö À̸ç,
Á¾·áµÈ ¼ö¾÷ÀÇ ¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ °Ô½ÃÆÇÀº
ÀÌ¿ëÀÌ ¾î·Á¿î Á¡ ¾çÇØ ºÎŹ µå¸³´Ï´Ù.
04