¹«·á ·¹º§Å×½ºÆ® ¹Þ°í °­»çÆò°¡ ³²±â¸é 1,OOO¿ø ÄíÆù Áï½Ã Àû¸³!

Ȥ½Ã »çÀÌÆ®¿¡¼± ãÁö ¸øÇÑ ±Ã±ÝÇÑ Á¡ÀÌ ÀÖÀ¸¼¼¿ä?
³²°ÜÁֽŠÀ̸ÞÀÏÀ» ÅëÇØ ´äº¯ µå¸®°Ú½À´Ï´Ù.

¹®ÀÇÇϽŠ³»¿ëÀÌ ¹®ÀÚ·Î ¹ß¼ÛµÇ¿À´Ï
¿¬¶ôó¸¦ ³²°ÜÁÖ¼¼¿ä.
¾÷¹«½Ã°£ ¿ù~±Ý ¿ÀÀü9½Ã~¿ÀÈÄ6½Ã
(Á¡½É½Ã°£ ³·12½Ã~¿ÀÈÄ1½Ã)

¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ °Ô½ÃÆÇ

¿µ¾î ¸»Çϱâ¿Í ¾²±â¸¦ µ¿½Ã¿¡ Àâ´Â´Ù!

ÀڽŠÀÖ°Ô ¾µ ¼ö ÀÖ´Â ¿µÀÛ¹®À» À§ÇØ ÆÄ¿öÀ×±Û¸®½¬ ¼ö¾÷À» ¼ö°­ÇϽôÂ
ȸ¿ø´Ôµé²² ¹«·á·Î Á¦°øÇص帮´Â ºÎ°¡ ¼­ºñ½º·Î, Àü¹® ºÐ¾ß¸¦ Á¦¿ÜÇÑ ÀÚÀ¯ ÁÖÁ¦
¶Ç´Â °­»ç´ÔÀÌ ³»Áֽô °úÁ¦¸¦ ȸ¿ø´Ô²²¼­ ¿µ¾î·Î ÀÛ¼ºÇØÁֽøé,
´ã´ç °­»ç ´Ô²²¼­ ¡®¹®¹ý ¿À·ù ±³Á¤¡¯ °ú ¡®´õ ³ªÀº ¿µ¾î½Ä Ç¥Çö¡¯À¸·Î ±³Á¤ÇØÁÖ´Â
¼­ºñ½º ÀÔ´Ï´Ù.

The wonderful holidays with my friends.

ÀÛ¼ºÀÚ: ÃÖ*ȯ
2023-09-06 959

ȸ¿ø´ÔÀÇ ¿µÀÛ¹®

I have a good memory about holidays with my friends. I went on a trip by train with my best friends who were high school mates. The train ticket which used free during a week was special prices for students. So we went around Korea during the week by train. We slept Korean style spa which called gim-gil-bang. We had to save money because we were students so we didn't have much money. That time was so funny and memorable to me.

°­»ç´ÔÀÇ Ã·»è±³Á¤ ³»¿ë

Hello again, Thomas!

The best memories are sometimes those that we spend with our friends. Mostly, they are our high school pals. Those times, we did not really have enough money but we never run short of fun.

These memories will last a lifetime. Today, we can still create good ones. It may not be easy but we need to try.

You are a very good story-teller. Your sentences are clear and meaningful. Please study the grammar points I made.

Great job! See you.

-T. Donna~

I have a good memory about holidays with my friends. 
>> Correct!

I went on a trip by train with my best friends who were high school mates. 
>>   I went on a trip by train with my best friends who were my high school mates. 

The train ticket which used free during a week was special prices for students. 
>> The train ticket which we used for free during a week were special prices for students. 

So we went around Korea during the week by train. 
>> Correct!

We slept Korean style spa which called gim-gil-bang. 
>> We slept in a  Korean style spa which is called gim-gil-bang. 

We had to save money because we were students so we didn't have much money. 
>> Correct!

That time was so funny and memorable to me.
>> Correct!
¹øÈ£ Á¦¸ñ ±Û¾´ÀÌ °ø°³ »óÅ µî·ÏÀÏ Á¶È¸¼ö
129143 Can you Kiki ¼Û*¿ì ¿Ï·á 2023-06-28 1416
129142 What is your favorite book? ÀÓ*È£ ¿Ï·á 2023-06-28 1
129141 Homework ¿À*ºó ¿Ï·á 2023-06-28 1
129140 Homework ¿À*ºó ¿Ï·á 2023-06-28 3
129139 My husband ¹Î*Á¤ ¿Ï·á 2023-06-28 1
129138 How do you motivate yourself? ½Å*¼· ¿Ï·á 2023-06-28 1463
129137 Homework ½Å*È­ ¿Ï·á 2023-06-28 962
129136 What would you do if your mobile phone is lost and you are... ±¸*¹Ì ¿Ï·á 2023-06-28 0
129135 Is it okay to use animals for business? For example, zoos. ¾Ù* ¿Ï·á 2023-06-28 1
129134 My favorite TV series! ±è*À± ¿Ï·á 2023-06-28 1736
129133 Do you agree with Alice Bloch\'s opinion? ±Ç*Áø ¿Ï·á 2023-06-28 2
129132 Homework ÇÔ*ÁÖ ¿Ï·á 2023-06-28 1
129131 Do you agree that religious leaders should maintain celibacy?... ¹®*Çö ¿Ï·á 2023-06-28 1376
129130 Homework ÀÌ*Áø ¿Ï·á 2023-06-28 1052
129129 How will you help a friend who is experiencing a sexual assault?... ±è*¹Î ¿Ï·á 2023-06-28 5
129128 What kind of work environment do you prefer for your ideal job? Á¶*¹Î ¿Ï·á 2023-06-28 0
129127 homework È«*¼± ¿Ï·á 2023-06-28 1
129126 Homework ¼Û*ÁØ ¿Ï·á 2023-06-28 1843
129125 Writing task ¾È*Çü ¿Ï·á 2023-06-28 1240
129124 27.Jun.2023 ±è*Á¤ ¿Ï·á 2023-06-28 2

HOW TO USE IT?

[¸¶ÀÌÆäÀÌÁö > ¼ö¾÷ ³»¿ë º¸±â > ÇнÀ Ķ¸°´õ > ¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ ¹öÆ° Ŭ¸¯]

¼ö¾÷ Ƚ¼ö¸¸Å­ ¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ °Ô½ÃÆÇÀÌ »ý¼ºµÇ¸ç,
Áö³­ ³¯Â¥¿¡µµ °Ô½Ã ÇÒ ¼ö ÀÖ½À´Ï´Ù.

ÁÖ5ȸ ¼ö¾÷ : ¿ù 20ȸ ÀÌ¿ë °¡´É
ÁÖ3ȸ ¼ö¾÷ : ¿ù 12ȸ ÀÌ¿ë °¡´É
ÁÖ2ȸ ¼ö¾÷ : ¿ù 08ȸ ÀÌ¿ë °¡´É
01
±³Á¤ ³»¿ëÀº ÃÖ´ë 1,000byte±îÁö ¿Ã¸± ¼ö ÀÖ½À´Ï´Ù.

÷ºÎ ÆÄÀÏÀº ¿øÈ°ÇÑ Ã·»èÀ» À§ÇÑ Âü°íÀÚ·á·Î »ç¿ëµÉ »Ó,
ÆÄÀÏ¿¡ ´ëÇÑ Ã·»èÀº ºÒ°¡´É ÇÕ´Ï´Ù.

¾÷·Îµå °¡´ÉÇÑ Ã·ºÎ ÆÄÀÏÀº ÃÖ´ë 2mb±îÁöÀ̸ç,
÷ºÎ ÇÒ ¼ö ÀÖ´Â ÆÄÀÏ Çü½ÄÀº ´ÙÀ½°ú °°½À´Ï´Ù.

¹®¼­ - PDF, TXT, DOCX,
À̹ÌÁö - JPEG, PNG, GIF
02
Àü¹® ºÐ¾ß¸¦ Á¦¿ÜÇÑ È¸¿ø´ÔÀÌ Á÷Á¢ ÀÛ¼ºÇÑ ±Û¸¸
÷»èÀÌ °¡´ÉÇϸç,

¿Ã·ÁÁֽŠ±ÛÀÇ °­»ç´Ô ÷»èÀº 24½Ã°£ À̳»¿¡
¿Ï·á µÇ´Â °ÍÀ» ¿øÄ¢À¸·Î ÇÏ°í ÀÖ½À´Ï´Ù.
03
ÇÏ·ç °Ô½Ã °¡´ÉÇÑ ±ÛÀº 3ȸ±îÁö À̸ç,
Á¾·áµÈ ¼ö¾÷ÀÇ ¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ °Ô½ÃÆÇÀº
ÀÌ¿ëÀÌ ¾î·Á¿î Á¡ ¾çÇØ ºÎŹ µå¸³´Ï´Ù.
04