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2023-09-04 713

ȸ¿ø´ÔÀÇ ¿µÀÛ¹®

Sightseeing is an integral part of traveling. I can¡¯t wait to see sights when traveling. If i have a chance to introduce our country to foreign friends, i can¡¯t wait to bring them to Namsan tower which had amazing night view. From the view you can feel how many people live in Seoul and a lot of people light themselves just like beautiful light. I mean if someone work overtime, there couldn¡¯t be light at night.

If they want to see just traditional things, i would introduce our traditional palace such as gyeongbok palace. This place is the most popular among foreigners but it is easy for them to miss important thing. This place is connected to Blue house where previous presidents lived and worked. So i will take them to this place

°­»ç´ÔÀÇ Ã·»è±³Á¤ ³»¿ë

You are good at recommending good places, Jun! Your essay got better because of the options you presented. Keep it up!-Faith-
Sightseeing is an integral part of traveling. 
>> Sightseeing is an integral part of traveling. 
I can¡¯t wait to see sights when traveling. 
>> CORRECT
OR I can¡¯t wait to see marvelous sights when traveling. 
If i have a chance to introduce our country to foreign friends, i can¡¯t wait to bring them to Namsan tower which had amazing night view. 
>> If I had a chance to introduce our country to foreign friends, I could not wait to bring them to Namsan Tower which had an amazing night view. 
From the view you can feel how many people live in Seoul and a lot of people light themselves just like beautiful light. 
>> By the view, you can feel the number of people living in Seoul and a lot of people light themselves just like beautiful lights. 
I mean if someone work overtime, there couldn¡¯t be light at night.
>> I mean if someone worked overtime, there would be light at night.
If they want to see just traditional things, i would introduce our traditional palace such as gyeongbok palace. 
>> If they wanted to see just traditional things, I would introduce our traditional palace such as Gyeongbok Palace. 
This place is the most popular among foreigners but it is easy for them to miss important thing. 
>> This place is the most popular among foreigners, but it is easy for them to miss an important thing. 
This place is connected to Blue house where previous presidents lived and worked. 
>> This place is connected to the Blue House where previous presidents lived and worked. 
So i will take them to this place
>> Therefore, I will take them to this place.
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