¹«·á ·¹º§Å×½ºÆ® ¹Þ°í °­»çÆò°¡ ³²±â¸é 1,OOO¿ø ÄíÆù Áï½Ã Àû¸³!

Ȥ½Ã »çÀÌÆ®¿¡¼± ãÁö ¸øÇÑ ±Ã±ÝÇÑ Á¡ÀÌ ÀÖÀ¸¼¼¿ä?
³²°ÜÁֽŠÀ̸ÞÀÏÀ» ÅëÇØ ´äº¯ µå¸®°Ú½À´Ï´Ù.

¹®ÀÇÇϽŠ³»¿ëÀÌ ¹®ÀÚ·Î ¹ß¼ÛµÇ¿À´Ï
¿¬¶ôó¸¦ ³²°ÜÁÖ¼¼¿ä.
¾÷¹«½Ã°£ ¿ù~±Ý ¿ÀÀü9½Ã~¿ÀÈÄ6½Ã
(Á¡½É½Ã°£ ³·12½Ã~¿ÀÈÄ1½Ã)

¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ °Ô½ÃÆÇ

¿µ¾î ¸»Çϱâ¿Í ¾²±â¸¦ µ¿½Ã¿¡ Àâ´Â´Ù!

ÀڽŠÀÖ°Ô ¾µ ¼ö ÀÖ´Â ¿µÀÛ¹®À» À§ÇØ ÆÄ¿öÀ×±Û¸®½¬ ¼ö¾÷À» ¼ö°­ÇϽôÂ
ȸ¿ø´Ôµé²² ¹«·á·Î Á¦°øÇص帮´Â ºÎ°¡ ¼­ºñ½º·Î, Àü¹® ºÐ¾ß¸¦ Á¦¿ÜÇÑ ÀÚÀ¯ ÁÖÁ¦
¶Ç´Â °­»ç´ÔÀÌ ³»Áֽô °úÁ¦¸¦ ȸ¿ø´Ô²²¼­ ¿µ¾î·Î ÀÛ¼ºÇØÁֽøé,
´ã´ç °­»ç ´Ô²²¼­ ¡®¹®¹ý ¿À·ù ±³Á¤¡¯ °ú ¡®´õ ³ªÀº ¿µ¾î½Ä Ç¥Çö¡¯À¸·Î ±³Á¤ÇØÁÖ´Â
¼­ºñ½º ÀÔ´Ï´Ù.

Introduction our things

ÀÛ¼ºÀÚ: ¼º*°æ
2023-09-04 552

ȸ¿ø´ÔÀÇ ¿µÀÛ¹®

Sightseeing is an integral part of traveling. I can¡¯t wait to see sights when traveling. If i have a chance to introduce our country to foreign friends, i can¡¯t wait to bring them to Namsan tower which had amazing night view. From the view you can feel how many people live in Seoul and a lot of people light themselves just like beautiful light. I mean if someone work overtime, there couldn¡¯t be light at night.

If they want to see just traditional things, i would introduce our traditional palace such as gyeongbok palace. This place is the most popular among foreigners but it is easy for them to miss important thing. This place is connected to Blue house where previous presidents lived and worked. So i will take them to this place

°­»ç´ÔÀÇ Ã·»è±³Á¤ ³»¿ë

You are good at recommending good places, Jun! Your essay got better because of the options you presented. Keep it up!-Faith-
Sightseeing is an integral part of traveling. 
>> Sightseeing is an integral part of traveling. 
I can¡¯t wait to see sights when traveling. 
>> CORRECT
OR I can¡¯t wait to see marvelous sights when traveling. 
If i have a chance to introduce our country to foreign friends, i can¡¯t wait to bring them to Namsan tower which had amazing night view. 
>> If I had a chance to introduce our country to foreign friends, I could not wait to bring them to Namsan Tower which had an amazing night view. 
From the view you can feel how many people live in Seoul and a lot of people light themselves just like beautiful light. 
>> By the view, you can feel the number of people living in Seoul and a lot of people light themselves just like beautiful lights. 
I mean if someone work overtime, there couldn¡¯t be light at night.
>> I mean if someone worked overtime, there would be light at night.
If they want to see just traditional things, i would introduce our traditional palace such as gyeongbok palace. 
>> If they wanted to see just traditional things, I would introduce our traditional palace such as Gyeongbok Palace. 
This place is the most popular among foreigners but it is easy for them to miss important thing. 
>> This place is the most popular among foreigners, but it is easy for them to miss an important thing. 
This place is connected to Blue house where previous presidents lived and worked. 
>> This place is connected to the Blue House where previous presidents lived and worked. 
So i will take them to this place
>> Therefore, I will take them to this place.
¹øÈ£ Á¦¸ñ ±Û¾´ÀÌ °ø°³ »óÅ µî·ÏÀÏ Á¶È¸¼ö
130638 I like hanging out ·ù*¿ø ¿Ï·á 2023-08-30 2
130637 If I apologize to my ex ÃÖ*ȯ ¿Ï·á 2023-08-30 965
130636 What is the best season to enjoy travelling in Korea? Why? ¹Ú*¿ì ¿Ï·á 2023-08-30 996
130635 To advise the other one ÃÖ*ȯ ¿Ï·á 2023-08-30 353
130634 homework 08.30 ÃÖ*Ç ¿Ï·á 2023-08-30 603
130633 Homework ±Ç*¹Ì ¿Ï·á 2023-08-30 0
130632 How important are books to you? ¿¡*¹Ì ¿Ï·á 2023-08-30 6
130631 Homework ±è*¼­ ¿Ï·á 2023-08-30 3
130630 Homework ÀÌ*°æ ¿Ï·á 2023-08-30 721
130629 What is the status of gender equality in South Korea? ÀÌ*ÁÖ ¿Ï·á 2023-08-30 2
130628 homework Á¤*È£ ¿Ï·á 2023-08-30 0
130627 homework Á¤*È£ ¿Ï·á 2023-08-30 0
130626 homework Á¤*È£ ¿Ï·á 2023-08-30 0
130625 What would you do if you had really noisy neighbors? ¿¡*¹Ì ¿Ï·á 2023-08-30 12
130624 HOMEWORK: Please write a short paragraph about \"The things I do... ¾Ù* ¿Ï·á 2023-08-30 1
130623 Answer for My birthday ÀÌ*À± ¿Ï·á 2023-08-30 561
130622 Prank call ±è*¾Æ ¿Ï·á 2023-08-30 2
130621 Homework ·ù*¿ì ¿Ï·á 2023-08-30 902
130620 Today\'s homework ÀÌ*µµ ¿Ï·á 2023-08-30 757
130619 What are you most passionate about? Why? ±è*¿¬ ¿Ï·á 2023-08-30 3

HOW TO USE IT?

[¸¶ÀÌÆäÀÌÁö > ¼ö¾÷ ³»¿ë º¸±â > ÇнÀ Ķ¸°´õ > ¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ ¹öÆ° Ŭ¸¯]

¼ö¾÷ Ƚ¼ö¸¸Å­ ¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ °Ô½ÃÆÇÀÌ »ý¼ºµÇ¸ç,
Áö³­ ³¯Â¥¿¡µµ °Ô½Ã ÇÒ ¼ö ÀÖ½À´Ï´Ù.

ÁÖ5ȸ ¼ö¾÷ : ¿ù 20ȸ ÀÌ¿ë °¡´É
ÁÖ3ȸ ¼ö¾÷ : ¿ù 12ȸ ÀÌ¿ë °¡´É
ÁÖ2ȸ ¼ö¾÷ : ¿ù 08ȸ ÀÌ¿ë °¡´É
01
±³Á¤ ³»¿ëÀº ÃÖ´ë 1,000byte±îÁö ¿Ã¸± ¼ö ÀÖ½À´Ï´Ù.

÷ºÎ ÆÄÀÏÀº ¿øÈ°ÇÑ Ã·»èÀ» À§ÇÑ Âü°íÀÚ·á·Î »ç¿ëµÉ »Ó,
ÆÄÀÏ¿¡ ´ëÇÑ Ã·»èÀº ºÒ°¡´É ÇÕ´Ï´Ù.

¾÷·Îµå °¡´ÉÇÑ Ã·ºÎ ÆÄÀÏÀº ÃÖ´ë 2mb±îÁöÀ̸ç,
÷ºÎ ÇÒ ¼ö ÀÖ´Â ÆÄÀÏ Çü½ÄÀº ´ÙÀ½°ú °°½À´Ï´Ù.

¹®¼­ - PDF, TXT, DOCX,
À̹ÌÁö - JPEG, PNG, GIF
02
Àü¹® ºÐ¾ß¸¦ Á¦¿ÜÇÑ È¸¿ø´ÔÀÌ Á÷Á¢ ÀÛ¼ºÇÑ ±Û¸¸
÷»èÀÌ °¡´ÉÇϸç,

¿Ã·ÁÁֽŠ±ÛÀÇ °­»ç´Ô ÷»èÀº 24½Ã°£ À̳»¿¡
¿Ï·á µÇ´Â °ÍÀ» ¿øÄ¢À¸·Î ÇÏ°í ÀÖ½À´Ï´Ù.
03
ÇÏ·ç °Ô½Ã °¡´ÉÇÑ ±ÛÀº 3ȸ±îÁö À̸ç,
Á¾·áµÈ ¼ö¾÷ÀÇ ¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ °Ô½ÃÆÇÀº
ÀÌ¿ëÀÌ ¾î·Á¿î Á¡ ¾çÇØ ºÎŹ µå¸³´Ï´Ù.
04