¹«·á ·¹º§Å×½ºÆ® ¹Þ°í °­»çÆò°¡ ³²±â¸é 1,OOO¿ø ÄíÆù Áï½Ã Àû¸³!

Ȥ½Ã »çÀÌÆ®¿¡¼± ãÁö ¸øÇÑ ±Ã±ÝÇÑ Á¡ÀÌ ÀÖÀ¸¼¼¿ä?
³²°ÜÁֽŠÀ̸ÞÀÏÀ» ÅëÇØ ´äº¯ µå¸®°Ú½À´Ï´Ù.

¹®ÀÇÇϽŠ³»¿ëÀÌ ¹®ÀÚ·Î ¹ß¼ÛµÇ¿À´Ï
¿¬¶ôó¸¦ ³²°ÜÁÖ¼¼¿ä.
¾÷¹«½Ã°£ ¿ù~±Ý ¿ÀÀü9½Ã~¿ÀÈÄ6½Ã
(Á¡½É½Ã°£ ³·12½Ã~¿ÀÈÄ1½Ã)

¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ °Ô½ÃÆÇ

¿µ¾î ¸»Çϱâ¿Í ¾²±â¸¦ µ¿½Ã¿¡ Àâ´Â´Ù!

ÀڽŠÀÖ°Ô ¾µ ¼ö ÀÖ´Â ¿µÀÛ¹®À» À§ÇØ ÆÄ¿öÀ×±Û¸®½¬ ¼ö¾÷À» ¼ö°­ÇϽôÂ
ȸ¿ø´Ôµé²² ¹«·á·Î Á¦°øÇص帮´Â ºÎ°¡ ¼­ºñ½º·Î, Àü¹® ºÐ¾ß¸¦ Á¦¿ÜÇÑ ÀÚÀ¯ ÁÖÁ¦
¶Ç´Â °­»ç´ÔÀÌ ³»Áֽô °úÁ¦¸¦ ȸ¿ø´Ô²²¼­ ¿µ¾î·Î ÀÛ¼ºÇØÁֽøé,
´ã´ç °­»ç ´Ô²²¼­ ¡®¹®¹ý ¿À·ù ±³Á¤¡¯ °ú ¡®´õ ³ªÀº ¿µ¾î½Ä Ç¥Çö¡¯À¸·Î ±³Á¤ÇØÁÖ´Â
¼­ºñ½º ÀÔ´Ï´Ù.

Introduction our things

ÀÛ¼ºÀÚ: ¼º*°æ
2023-09-04 1528

ȸ¿ø´ÔÀÇ ¿µÀÛ¹®

Sightseeing is an integral part of traveling. I can¡¯t wait to see sights when traveling. If i have a chance to introduce our country to foreign friends, i can¡¯t wait to bring them to Namsan tower which had amazing night view. From the view you can feel how many people live in Seoul and a lot of people light themselves just like beautiful light. I mean if someone work overtime, there couldn¡¯t be light at night.

If they want to see just traditional things, i would introduce our traditional palace such as gyeongbok palace. This place is the most popular among foreigners but it is easy for them to miss important thing. This place is connected to Blue house where previous presidents lived and worked. So i will take them to this place

°­»ç´ÔÀÇ Ã·»è±³Á¤ ³»¿ë

You are good at recommending good places, Jun! Your essay got better because of the options you presented. Keep it up!-Faith-
Sightseeing is an integral part of traveling. 
>> Sightseeing is an integral part of traveling. 
I can¡¯t wait to see sights when traveling. 
>> CORRECT
OR I can¡¯t wait to see marvelous sights when traveling. 
If i have a chance to introduce our country to foreign friends, i can¡¯t wait to bring them to Namsan tower which had amazing night view. 
>> If I had a chance to introduce our country to foreign friends, I could not wait to bring them to Namsan Tower which had an amazing night view. 
From the view you can feel how many people live in Seoul and a lot of people light themselves just like beautiful light. 
>> By the view, you can feel the number of people living in Seoul and a lot of people light themselves just like beautiful lights. 
I mean if someone work overtime, there couldn¡¯t be light at night.
>> I mean if someone worked overtime, there would be light at night.
If they want to see just traditional things, i would introduce our traditional palace such as gyeongbok palace. 
>> If they wanted to see just traditional things, I would introduce our traditional palace such as Gyeongbok Palace. 
This place is the most popular among foreigners but it is easy for them to miss important thing. 
>> This place is the most popular among foreigners, but it is easy for them to miss an important thing. 
This place is connected to Blue house where previous presidents lived and worked. 
>> This place is connected to the Blue House where previous presidents lived and worked. 
So i will take them to this place
>> Therefore, I will take them to this place.
¹øÈ£ Á¦¸ñ ±Û¾´ÀÌ °ø°³ »óÅ µî·ÏÀÏ Á¶È¸¼ö
134731 Homework do*eun ¿Ï·á 2024-02-16 947
134730 Which one do you think is more difficult, lose your sight or... ÀÓ*È£ ¿Ï·á 2024-02-16 0
134729 What do you think is the worst social problem? ½Å*¼· ¿Ï·á 2024-02-16 965
134728 What are the effects of loving to read? ÀÓ*È£ ¿Ï·á 2024-02-16 2
134727 Some people think video games are a waste of time. What do you... ÀÓ*È£ ¿Ï·á 2024-02-16 0
134726 What Korean tradition do you like most? ÀÓ*È£ ¿Ï·á 2024-02-16 0
134725 WRITING TASK: What do you enjoy eating with your friends? ÀÓ*Áö ¿Ï·á 2024-02-16 3
134724 Catch up the fashion ÀÓ*Áø ¿Ï·á 2024-02-16 1044
134723 Advise ¿°*¿¹ ¿Ï·á 2024-02-16 1
134722 Giving a hand ¿°*¿¹ ¿Ï·á 2024-02-16 1
134721 Have you ever helped a friend when they really needed help ?... ¹Ú*È£ ¿Ï·á 2024-02-16 1053
134720 Hiring part-time instructors ¾ç*¿¬ ¿Ï·á 2024-02-16 1380
134719 what do you think of leaves ±è*¿Á ¿Ï·á 2024-02-15 1354
134718 homework 02.15 ÃÖ*Ç ¿Ï·á 2024-02-15 795
134717 Suggestions on my life ÀÌ*±Ô ¿Ï·á 2024-02-15 1142
134716 Choose holidays ¹Ú*À² ¿Ï·á 2024-02-15 1435
134715 homework ±è*Çö ¿Ï·á 2024-02-15 1426
134714 My best about holidays ±è*¾Æ ¿Ï·á 2024-02-15 1941
134713 If you could spend a day with any fictional character, who would... ÃÖ*ÈÆ ¿Ï·á 2024-02-15 1088
134712 How do you find the best restaurants to eat at? ¿À*Çö ¿Ï·á 2024-02-15 908

HOW TO USE IT?

[¸¶ÀÌÆäÀÌÁö > ¼ö¾÷ ³»¿ë º¸±â > ÇнÀ Ķ¸°´õ > ¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ ¹öÆ° Ŭ¸¯]

¼ö¾÷ Ƚ¼ö¸¸Å­ ¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ °Ô½ÃÆÇÀÌ »ý¼ºµÇ¸ç,
Áö³­ ³¯Â¥¿¡µµ °Ô½Ã ÇÒ ¼ö ÀÖ½À´Ï´Ù.

ÁÖ5ȸ ¼ö¾÷ : ¿ù 20ȸ ÀÌ¿ë °¡´É
ÁÖ3ȸ ¼ö¾÷ : ¿ù 12ȸ ÀÌ¿ë °¡´É
ÁÖ2ȸ ¼ö¾÷ : ¿ù 08ȸ ÀÌ¿ë °¡´É
01
±³Á¤ ³»¿ëÀº ÃÖ´ë 1,000byte±îÁö ¿Ã¸± ¼ö ÀÖ½À´Ï´Ù.

÷ºÎ ÆÄÀÏÀº ¿øÈ°ÇÑ Ã·»èÀ» À§ÇÑ Âü°íÀÚ·á·Î »ç¿ëµÉ »Ó,
ÆÄÀÏ¿¡ ´ëÇÑ Ã·»èÀº ºÒ°¡´É ÇÕ´Ï´Ù.

¾÷·Îµå °¡´ÉÇÑ Ã·ºÎ ÆÄÀÏÀº ÃÖ´ë 2mb±îÁöÀ̸ç,
÷ºÎ ÇÒ ¼ö ÀÖ´Â ÆÄÀÏ Çü½ÄÀº ´ÙÀ½°ú °°½À´Ï´Ù.

¹®¼­ - PDF, TXT, DOCX,
À̹ÌÁö - JPEG, PNG, GIF
02
Àü¹® ºÐ¾ß¸¦ Á¦¿ÜÇÑ È¸¿ø´ÔÀÌ Á÷Á¢ ÀÛ¼ºÇÑ ±Û¸¸
÷»èÀÌ °¡´ÉÇϸç,

¿Ã·ÁÁֽŠ±ÛÀÇ °­»ç´Ô ÷»èÀº 24½Ã°£ À̳»¿¡
¿Ï·á µÇ´Â °ÍÀ» ¿øÄ¢À¸·Î ÇÏ°í ÀÖ½À´Ï´Ù.
03
ÇÏ·ç °Ô½Ã °¡´ÉÇÑ ±ÛÀº 3ȸ±îÁö À̸ç,
Á¾·áµÈ ¼ö¾÷ÀÇ ¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ °Ô½ÃÆÇÀº
ÀÌ¿ëÀÌ ¾î·Á¿î Á¡ ¾çÇØ ºÎŹ µå¸³´Ï´Ù.
04