¹«·á ·¹º§Å×½ºÆ® ¹Þ°í °­»çÆò°¡ ³²±â¸é 1,OOO¿ø ÄíÆù Áï½Ã Àû¸³!

Ȥ½Ã »çÀÌÆ®¿¡¼± ãÁö ¸øÇÑ ±Ã±ÝÇÑ Á¡ÀÌ ÀÖÀ¸¼¼¿ä?
³²°ÜÁֽŠÀ̸ÞÀÏÀ» ÅëÇØ ´äº¯ µå¸®°Ú½À´Ï´Ù.

¹®ÀÇÇϽŠ³»¿ëÀÌ ¹®ÀÚ·Î ¹ß¼ÛµÇ¿À´Ï
¿¬¶ôó¸¦ ³²°ÜÁÖ¼¼¿ä.
¾÷¹«½Ã°£ ¿ù~±Ý ¿ÀÀü9½Ã~¿ÀÈÄ6½Ã
(Á¡½É½Ã°£ ³·12½Ã~¿ÀÈÄ1½Ã)

¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ °Ô½ÃÆÇ

¿µ¾î ¸»Çϱâ¿Í ¾²±â¸¦ µ¿½Ã¿¡ Àâ´Â´Ù!

ÀڽŠÀÖ°Ô ¾µ ¼ö ÀÖ´Â ¿µÀÛ¹®À» À§ÇØ ÆÄ¿öÀ×±Û¸®½¬ ¼ö¾÷À» ¼ö°­ÇϽôÂ
ȸ¿ø´Ôµé²² ¹«·á·Î Á¦°øÇص帮´Â ºÎ°¡ ¼­ºñ½º·Î, Àü¹® ºÐ¾ß¸¦ Á¦¿ÜÇÑ ÀÚÀ¯ ÁÖÁ¦
¶Ç´Â °­»ç´ÔÀÌ ³»Áֽô °úÁ¦¸¦ ȸ¿ø´Ô²²¼­ ¿µ¾î·Î ÀÛ¼ºÇØÁֽøé,
´ã´ç °­»ç ´Ô²²¼­ ¡®¹®¹ý ¿À·ù ±³Á¤¡¯ °ú ¡®´õ ³ªÀº ¿µ¾î½Ä Ç¥Çö¡¯À¸·Î ±³Á¤ÇØÁÖ´Â
¼­ºñ½º ÀÔ´Ï´Ù.

Promoting

ÀÛ¼ºÀÚ: ¼º*°æ
2023-09-03 1730

ȸ¿ø´ÔÀÇ ¿µÀÛ¹®

I want to promote myself. You know what? Most of people don¡¯t know how we are precious. Even though we are good at work in your job, we are valuable presence. I had also ignored my self until i have started meditation. Bu after doing that, i can tell i have to be proud of myself, because i am the most valuable thing to myself.

I¡¯m tall and maintain good shape. And i always try to develop myself by exercising and reading. These things always enforce my value. The final step is to be respectful person that most of people around me like to assemble me.

°­»ç´ÔÀÇ Ã·»è±³Á¤ ³»¿ë

You wrote a touching and reasonable essay, Jun! May you always see your value as a person. You were created with purpose and uniqueness. For my capitalization tip for you, the pronoun 'I' should always be capitalized.-Faith-
I want to promote myself. 
>> CORRECT
You know what? 
>> Do you know why?
Most of people don¡¯t know how we are precious. 
>> Most people do not know how precious we are.
Even though we are good at work in your job, we are valuable presence. 
>> Even though we are good at work, they do not value our presence. 
I had also ignored my self until i have started meditation. 
>> I had also ignored my self until I have started meditation. 
Bu after doing that, i can tell i have to be proud of myself, because i am the most valuable thing to myself.
>> However, after doing that, I can tell I have to be proud of myself because I am the most valuable thing to myself.
I¡¯m tall and maintain good shape. And i always try to develop myself by exercising and reading. 
>> I¡¯m tall, I maintain a good shape, and I always try to develop myself by exercising and reading. 
These things always enforce my value. 
>> CORRECT
OR These things enlighten me about my worth. 
The final step is to be respectful person that most of people around me like to assemble me.
>> The final step is to be a respectful person so that most people around me like to resemble me.
¹øÈ£ Á¦¸ñ ±Û¾´ÀÌ °ø°³ »óÅ µî·ÏÀÏ Á¶È¸¼ö
134206 homework 01.25 ÃÖ*Ç ¿Ï·á 2024-01-25 1393
134205 Homework ±è*´Ô ¿Ï·á 2024-01-25 1211
134204 Homework À±*¼± ¿Ï·á 2024-01-25 1422
134203 What are the advantages and disadvantages of a four-day week? ¼­*¿¬ ¿Ï·á 2024-01-25 2333
134202 Homework ±Ç*¹Ì ¿Ï·á 2024-01-25 1
134201 The disparities in the university system °­*À² ¿Ï·á 2024-01-25 1
134200 What do you think is the most challenging thing about... ±è*Áö ¿Ï·á 2024-01-25 2
134199 home work ÃÖ*¼Ø ¿Ï·á 2024-01-25 1104
134198 If you possessed a time machine, would you choose to journey... ¿¡*¹Ì ¿Ï·á 2024-01-25 1
134197 HOMEWORK: Please write a short paragraph about \"Is family... ¾Ù* ¿Ï·á 2024-01-25 0
134196 Homework ±è*¼­ ¿Ï·á 2024-01-25 2
134195 Describe a piece of advice you recently received. ÃÖ*ÈÆ ¿Ï·á 2024-01-25 1284
134194 Homework ±è*¼÷ ¿Ï·á 2024-01-25 1486
134193 Homework ±è*¿ì ¿Ï·á 2024-01-25 507
134192 Home work ÀÌ*µð ¿Ï·á 2024-01-25 1330
134191 home work ÀÌ*µð ¿Ï·á 2024-01-25 1
134190 What do you usually prepare during family gatherings? Why?... Ȳ*Àº ¿Ï·á 2024-01-25 1120
134189 Homework ±Ç*¹Ì ¿Ï·á 2024-01-25 0
134188 Homework ·ù*¿ì ¿Ï·á 2024-01-25 1772
134187 What is the difference of Daejon and Seoul\'s transportation... Ȳ*Àº ¿Ï·á 2024-01-25 1340

HOW TO USE IT?

[¸¶ÀÌÆäÀÌÁö > ¼ö¾÷ ³»¿ë º¸±â > ÇнÀ Ķ¸°´õ > ¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ ¹öÆ° Ŭ¸¯]

¼ö¾÷ Ƚ¼ö¸¸Å­ ¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ °Ô½ÃÆÇÀÌ »ý¼ºµÇ¸ç,
Áö³­ ³¯Â¥¿¡µµ °Ô½Ã ÇÒ ¼ö ÀÖ½À´Ï´Ù.

ÁÖ5ȸ ¼ö¾÷ : ¿ù 20ȸ ÀÌ¿ë °¡´É
ÁÖ3ȸ ¼ö¾÷ : ¿ù 12ȸ ÀÌ¿ë °¡´É
ÁÖ2ȸ ¼ö¾÷ : ¿ù 08ȸ ÀÌ¿ë °¡´É
01
±³Á¤ ³»¿ëÀº ÃÖ´ë 1,000byte±îÁö ¿Ã¸± ¼ö ÀÖ½À´Ï´Ù.

÷ºÎ ÆÄÀÏÀº ¿øÈ°ÇÑ Ã·»èÀ» À§ÇÑ Âü°íÀÚ·á·Î »ç¿ëµÉ »Ó,
ÆÄÀÏ¿¡ ´ëÇÑ Ã·»èÀº ºÒ°¡´É ÇÕ´Ï´Ù.

¾÷·Îµå °¡´ÉÇÑ Ã·ºÎ ÆÄÀÏÀº ÃÖ´ë 2mb±îÁöÀ̸ç,
÷ºÎ ÇÒ ¼ö ÀÖ´Â ÆÄÀÏ Çü½ÄÀº ´ÙÀ½°ú °°½À´Ï´Ù.

¹®¼­ - PDF, TXT, DOCX,
À̹ÌÁö - JPEG, PNG, GIF
02
Àü¹® ºÐ¾ß¸¦ Á¦¿ÜÇÑ È¸¿ø´ÔÀÌ Á÷Á¢ ÀÛ¼ºÇÑ ±Û¸¸
÷»èÀÌ °¡´ÉÇϸç,

¿Ã·ÁÁֽŠ±ÛÀÇ °­»ç´Ô ÷»èÀº 24½Ã°£ À̳»¿¡
¿Ï·á µÇ´Â °ÍÀ» ¿øÄ¢À¸·Î ÇÏ°í ÀÖ½À´Ï´Ù.
03
ÇÏ·ç °Ô½Ã °¡´ÉÇÑ ±ÛÀº 3ȸ±îÁö À̸ç,
Á¾·áµÈ ¼ö¾÷ÀÇ ¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ °Ô½ÃÆÇÀº
ÀÌ¿ëÀÌ ¾î·Á¿î Á¡ ¾çÇØ ºÎŹ µå¸³´Ï´Ù.
04