¹«·á ·¹º§Å×½ºÆ® ¹Þ°í °­»çÆò°¡ ³²±â¸é 1,OOO¿ø ÄíÆù Áï½Ã Àû¸³!

Ȥ½Ã »çÀÌÆ®¿¡¼± ãÁö ¸øÇÑ ±Ã±ÝÇÑ Á¡ÀÌ ÀÖÀ¸¼¼¿ä?
³²°ÜÁֽŠÀ̸ÞÀÏÀ» ÅëÇØ ´äº¯ µå¸®°Ú½À´Ï´Ù.

¹®ÀÇÇϽŠ³»¿ëÀÌ ¹®ÀÚ·Î ¹ß¼ÛµÇ¿À´Ï
¿¬¶ôó¸¦ ³²°ÜÁÖ¼¼¿ä.
¾÷¹«½Ã°£ ¿ù~±Ý ¿ÀÀü9½Ã~¿ÀÈÄ6½Ã
(Á¡½É½Ã°£ ³·12½Ã~¿ÀÈÄ1½Ã)

¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ °Ô½ÃÆÇ

¿µ¾î ¸»Çϱâ¿Í ¾²±â¸¦ µ¿½Ã¿¡ Àâ´Â´Ù!

ÀڽŠÀÖ°Ô ¾µ ¼ö ÀÖ´Â ¿µÀÛ¹®À» À§ÇØ ÆÄ¿öÀ×±Û¸®½¬ ¼ö¾÷À» ¼ö°­ÇϽôÂ
ȸ¿ø´Ôµé²² ¹«·á·Î Á¦°øÇص帮´Â ºÎ°¡ ¼­ºñ½º·Î, Àü¹® ºÐ¾ß¸¦ Á¦¿ÜÇÑ ÀÚÀ¯ ÁÖÁ¦
¶Ç´Â °­»ç´ÔÀÌ ³»Áֽô °úÁ¦¸¦ ȸ¿ø´Ô²²¼­ ¿µ¾î·Î ÀÛ¼ºÇØÁֽøé,
´ã´ç °­»ç ´Ô²²¼­ ¡®¹®¹ý ¿À·ù ±³Á¤¡¯ °ú ¡®´õ ³ªÀº ¿µ¾î½Ä Ç¥Çö¡¯À¸·Î ±³Á¤ÇØÁÖ´Â
¼­ºñ½º ÀÔ´Ï´Ù.

food

ÀÛ¼ºÀÚ: ±Ç*Èñ
2023-09-01 795

ȸ¿ø´ÔÀÇ ¿µÀÛ¹®

I worry about our products and food including sea food.

But the reason is not only the treated water but also environment destruction.

We are eating already many contaminated food, processed food and instant food that harm to the body.

People blame the treated wate more than necessary.

°­»ç´ÔÀÇ Ã·»è±³Á¤ ³»¿ë

Hello there, Ms. Lily!
How have you been?
Thank you that despite being busy, you still find ways to answer the question that I gave you because our class time is really limited and we don't get a chance to discuss more about the topic. 
See you later!
Aki~

I worry about our products and food including sea food.
>>> CORRECT!

But the reason is not only the treated water but also environment destruction.
>>> CORRECT!

We are eating already many contaminated food, processed food and instant food that harm to the body.
>>> We are eating already many contaminated food, processed food and instant food that harm to the body.

People blame the treated water more than necessary.
>>> CORRECT!

¹øÈ£ Á¦¸ñ ±Û¾´ÀÌ °ø°³ »óÅ µî·ÏÀÏ Á¶È¸¼ö
130819 According to a survey, over half of the Korean population has... ±è*È£ ¿Ï·á 2023-09-06 782
130818 What three (3) adjectives would you use to describe your... ±è*È£ ¿Ï·á 2023-09-06 730
130817 HOMEWORK: Please write a short paragraph about \"The happiest... ¾Ù* ¿Ï·á 2023-09-06 1
130816 Homework- What did you do last weekend? ±Ç*Èñ ¿Ï·á 2023-09-06 758
130815 Homework ·ù*¿ì ¿Ï·á 2023-09-06 498
130814 HOMEWORK FOR THE STUDENT: Do you like having a family gathering? ±è*¿¬ ¿Ï·á 2023-09-06 5
130813 What are the disadvantages of living in a bustling city? ¹Ú*¾Æ ¿Ï·á 2023-09-06 470
130812 HOMEWORK FOR THE STUDENT: What have you lost while traveling? ±è*¿¬ ¿Ï·á 2023-09-06 1
130811 homework ÀÌ*°æ ¿Ï·á 2023-09-06 380
130810 Do you love your neighborhood? Please explain your answer ¹Ú*¾Æ ¿Ï·á 2023-09-06 674
130809 HOMEWORK: Writing Exercise: Do you stay in touch with all of the... ¼­*ÅÃ ¿Ï·á 2023-09-06 720
130808 Homework JA*UNG CHUNG ¿Ï·á 2023-09-06 770
130807 Homework ½Å*È­ ¿Ï·á 2023-09-06 624
130806 WRITING TASK: What is your biggest dream? ÀÓ*Áö ¿Ï·á 2023-09-06 7
130805 ESSAY ±Ç*Á¤ ¿Ï·á 2023-09-06 4
130804 I stopped answering and thought. \"Did you really call me?\" À±*Çý ¿Ï·á 2023-09-06 932
130803 I don\'t go now, but I still like books because I like those... À±*Çý ¿Ï·á 2023-09-06 469
130802 I think victims\' behavior will be limited if they are subjected... À±*Çý ¿Ï·á 2023-09-06 539
130801 Tipping ±Ç*Èñ ¿Ï·á 2023-09-06 310
130800 If you met a tiger in your house, what would you do and/or say... ¿À*Çõ ¿Ï·á 2023-09-06 1

HOW TO USE IT?

[¸¶ÀÌÆäÀÌÁö > ¼ö¾÷ ³»¿ë º¸±â > ÇнÀ Ķ¸°´õ > ¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ ¹öÆ° Ŭ¸¯]

¼ö¾÷ Ƚ¼ö¸¸Å­ ¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ °Ô½ÃÆÇÀÌ »ý¼ºµÇ¸ç,
Áö³­ ³¯Â¥¿¡µµ °Ô½Ã ÇÒ ¼ö ÀÖ½À´Ï´Ù.

ÁÖ5ȸ ¼ö¾÷ : ¿ù 20ȸ ÀÌ¿ë °¡´É
ÁÖ3ȸ ¼ö¾÷ : ¿ù 12ȸ ÀÌ¿ë °¡´É
ÁÖ2ȸ ¼ö¾÷ : ¿ù 08ȸ ÀÌ¿ë °¡´É
01
±³Á¤ ³»¿ëÀº ÃÖ´ë 1,000byte±îÁö ¿Ã¸± ¼ö ÀÖ½À´Ï´Ù.

÷ºÎ ÆÄÀÏÀº ¿øÈ°ÇÑ Ã·»èÀ» À§ÇÑ Âü°íÀÚ·á·Î »ç¿ëµÉ »Ó,
ÆÄÀÏ¿¡ ´ëÇÑ Ã·»èÀº ºÒ°¡´É ÇÕ´Ï´Ù.

¾÷·Îµå °¡´ÉÇÑ Ã·ºÎ ÆÄÀÏÀº ÃÖ´ë 2mb±îÁöÀ̸ç,
÷ºÎ ÇÒ ¼ö ÀÖ´Â ÆÄÀÏ Çü½ÄÀº ´ÙÀ½°ú °°½À´Ï´Ù.

¹®¼­ - PDF, TXT, DOCX,
À̹ÌÁö - JPEG, PNG, GIF
02
Àü¹® ºÐ¾ß¸¦ Á¦¿ÜÇÑ È¸¿ø´ÔÀÌ Á÷Á¢ ÀÛ¼ºÇÑ ±Û¸¸
÷»èÀÌ °¡´ÉÇϸç,

¿Ã·ÁÁֽŠ±ÛÀÇ °­»ç´Ô ÷»èÀº 24½Ã°£ À̳»¿¡
¿Ï·á µÇ´Â °ÍÀ» ¿øÄ¢À¸·Î ÇÏ°í ÀÖ½À´Ï´Ù.
03
ÇÏ·ç °Ô½Ã °¡´ÉÇÑ ±ÛÀº 3ȸ±îÁö À̸ç,
Á¾·áµÈ ¼ö¾÷ÀÇ ¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ °Ô½ÃÆÇÀº
ÀÌ¿ëÀÌ ¾î·Á¿î Á¡ ¾çÇØ ºÎŹ µå¸³´Ï´Ù.
04