¹«·á ·¹º§Å×½ºÆ® ¹Þ°í °­»çÆò°¡ ³²±â¸é 1,OOO¿ø ÄíÆù Áï½Ã Àû¸³!

Ȥ½Ã »çÀÌÆ®¿¡¼± ãÁö ¸øÇÑ ±Ã±ÝÇÑ Á¡ÀÌ ÀÖÀ¸¼¼¿ä?
³²°ÜÁֽŠÀ̸ÞÀÏÀ» ÅëÇØ ´äº¯ µå¸®°Ú½À´Ï´Ù.

¹®ÀÇÇϽŠ³»¿ëÀÌ ¹®ÀÚ·Î ¹ß¼ÛµÇ¿À´Ï
¿¬¶ôó¸¦ ³²°ÜÁÖ¼¼¿ä.
¾÷¹«½Ã°£ ¿ù~±Ý ¿ÀÀü9½Ã~¿ÀÈÄ6½Ã
(Á¡½É½Ã°£ ³·12½Ã~¿ÀÈÄ1½Ã)

¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ °Ô½ÃÆÇ

¿µ¾î ¸»Çϱâ¿Í ¾²±â¸¦ µ¿½Ã¿¡ Àâ´Â´Ù!

ÀڽŠÀÖ°Ô ¾µ ¼ö ÀÖ´Â ¿µÀÛ¹®À» À§ÇØ ÆÄ¿öÀ×±Û¸®½¬ ¼ö¾÷À» ¼ö°­ÇϽôÂ
ȸ¿ø´Ôµé²² ¹«·á·Î Á¦°øÇص帮´Â ºÎ°¡ ¼­ºñ½º·Î, Àü¹® ºÐ¾ß¸¦ Á¦¿ÜÇÑ ÀÚÀ¯ ÁÖÁ¦
¶Ç´Â °­»ç´ÔÀÌ ³»Áֽô °úÁ¦¸¦ ȸ¿ø´Ô²²¼­ ¿µ¾î·Î ÀÛ¼ºÇØÁֽøé,
´ã´ç °­»ç ´Ô²²¼­ ¡®¹®¹ý ¿À·ù ±³Á¤¡¯ °ú ¡®´õ ³ªÀº ¿µ¾î½Ä Ç¥Çö¡¯À¸·Î ±³Á¤ÇØÁÖ´Â
¼­ºñ½º ÀÔ´Ï´Ù.

food

ÀÛ¼ºÀÚ: ±Ç*Èñ
2023-09-01 939

ȸ¿ø´ÔÀÇ ¿µÀÛ¹®

I worry about our products and food including sea food.

But the reason is not only the treated water but also environment destruction.

We are eating already many contaminated food, processed food and instant food that harm to the body.

People blame the treated wate more than necessary.

°­»ç´ÔÀÇ Ã·»è±³Á¤ ³»¿ë

Hello there, Ms. Lily!
How have you been?
Thank you that despite being busy, you still find ways to answer the question that I gave you because our class time is really limited and we don't get a chance to discuss more about the topic. 
See you later!
Aki~

I worry about our products and food including sea food.
>>> CORRECT!

But the reason is not only the treated water but also environment destruction.
>>> CORRECT!

We are eating already many contaminated food, processed food and instant food that harm to the body.
>>> We are eating already many contaminated food, processed food and instant food that harm to the body.

People blame the treated water more than necessary.
>>> CORRECT!

¹øÈ£ Á¦¸ñ ±Û¾´ÀÌ °ø°³ »óÅ µî·ÏÀÏ Á¶È¸¼ö
132281 Fulfilling the requests ÀÌ*±Ô ¿Ï·á 2023-11-08 1555
132280 homework 11.08 ÃÖ*Ç ¿Ï·á 2023-11-08 931
132279 Explain what you would do if your friends showed up at your... ÀÓ*È£ ¿Ï·á 2023-11-08 0
132278 What are the advantages of learning new skills? Sometimes,... ±è*±¹ ¿Ï·á 2023-11-08 1
132277 What Korean food is strange for you? ¼Û*¿ì ¿Ï·á 2023-11-08 1354
132276 homework ÀÌ*¼÷ ¿Ï·á 2023-11-08 1284
132275 homework Á¤*¾È ¿Ï·á 2023-11-08 1
132274 Homework ±è*¼­ ¿Ï·á 2023-11-08 1
132273 Homework ±è*¿ì ¿Ï·á 2023-11-08 1474
132272 Why do you think so many young people have lost respect for... ¿¡*¹Ì ¿Ï·á 2023-11-08 3
132271 HOMEWORK: Please write a short paragraph about ¡°Is being afraid... ¾Ù* ¿Ï·á 2023-11-08 1
132270 What do I reading most? ¹Ú*À² ¿Ï·á 2023-11-08 990
132269 Homework (Self introduction) ÀÌ*ÁÖ ¿Ï·á 2023-11-08 1160
132268 Homwork (2023.11.08) ÀÌ*ÁÖ ¿Ï·á 2023-11-08 1155
132267 Who does inflation hit the hardest? ½Å*¼· ¿Ï·á 2023-11-08 1073
132266 Have you ever encountered problems in attaching files in an... ±è*¾Æ ¿Ï·á 2023-11-08 1
132265 Homework : What is the strangest food you have ever eaten? ¹Ú*³ª ¿Ï·á 2023-11-08 1325
132264 If you had one wish, what would it be? ÀÌ*ºó ¿Ï·á 2023-11-08 1042
132263 What are the common career opportunities in Korea right now? DO... ÀÌ*ÅÂ ¿Ï·á 2023-11-08 1051
132262 Would you like to change your career someday? Why? If not, why... ÀÌ*ÅÂ ¿Ï·á 2023-11-08 963

HOW TO USE IT?

[¸¶ÀÌÆäÀÌÁö > ¼ö¾÷ ³»¿ë º¸±â > ÇнÀ Ķ¸°´õ > ¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ ¹öÆ° Ŭ¸¯]

¼ö¾÷ Ƚ¼ö¸¸Å­ ¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ °Ô½ÃÆÇÀÌ »ý¼ºµÇ¸ç,
Áö³­ ³¯Â¥¿¡µµ °Ô½Ã ÇÒ ¼ö ÀÖ½À´Ï´Ù.

ÁÖ5ȸ ¼ö¾÷ : ¿ù 20ȸ ÀÌ¿ë °¡´É
ÁÖ3ȸ ¼ö¾÷ : ¿ù 12ȸ ÀÌ¿ë °¡´É
ÁÖ2ȸ ¼ö¾÷ : ¿ù 08ȸ ÀÌ¿ë °¡´É
01
±³Á¤ ³»¿ëÀº ÃÖ´ë 1,000byte±îÁö ¿Ã¸± ¼ö ÀÖ½À´Ï´Ù.

÷ºÎ ÆÄÀÏÀº ¿øÈ°ÇÑ Ã·»èÀ» À§ÇÑ Âü°íÀÚ·á·Î »ç¿ëµÉ »Ó,
ÆÄÀÏ¿¡ ´ëÇÑ Ã·»èÀº ºÒ°¡´É ÇÕ´Ï´Ù.

¾÷·Îµå °¡´ÉÇÑ Ã·ºÎ ÆÄÀÏÀº ÃÖ´ë 2mb±îÁöÀ̸ç,
÷ºÎ ÇÒ ¼ö ÀÖ´Â ÆÄÀÏ Çü½ÄÀº ´ÙÀ½°ú °°½À´Ï´Ù.

¹®¼­ - PDF, TXT, DOCX,
À̹ÌÁö - JPEG, PNG, GIF
02
Àü¹® ºÐ¾ß¸¦ Á¦¿ÜÇÑ È¸¿ø´ÔÀÌ Á÷Á¢ ÀÛ¼ºÇÑ ±Û¸¸
÷»èÀÌ °¡´ÉÇϸç,

¿Ã·ÁÁֽŠ±ÛÀÇ °­»ç´Ô ÷»èÀº 24½Ã°£ À̳»¿¡
¿Ï·á µÇ´Â °ÍÀ» ¿øÄ¢À¸·Î ÇÏ°í ÀÖ½À´Ï´Ù.
03
ÇÏ·ç °Ô½Ã °¡´ÉÇÑ ±ÛÀº 3ȸ±îÁö À̸ç,
Á¾·áµÈ ¼ö¾÷ÀÇ ¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ °Ô½ÃÆÇÀº
ÀÌ¿ëÀÌ ¾î·Á¿î Á¡ ¾çÇØ ºÎŹ µå¸³´Ï´Ù.
04