¹«·á ·¹º§Å×½ºÆ® ¹Þ°í °­»çÆò°¡ ³²±â¸é 1,OOO¿ø ÄíÆù Áï½Ã Àû¸³!

Ȥ½Ã »çÀÌÆ®¿¡¼± ãÁö ¸øÇÑ ±Ã±ÝÇÑ Á¡ÀÌ ÀÖÀ¸¼¼¿ä?
³²°ÜÁֽŠÀ̸ÞÀÏÀ» ÅëÇØ ´äº¯ µå¸®°Ú½À´Ï´Ù.

¹®ÀÇÇϽŠ³»¿ëÀÌ ¹®ÀÚ·Î ¹ß¼ÛµÇ¿À´Ï
¿¬¶ôó¸¦ ³²°ÜÁÖ¼¼¿ä.
¾÷¹«½Ã°£ ¿ù~±Ý ¿ÀÀü9½Ã~¿ÀÈÄ6½Ã
(Á¡½É½Ã°£ ³·12½Ã~¿ÀÈÄ1½Ã)

¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ °Ô½ÃÆÇ

¿µ¾î ¸»Çϱâ¿Í ¾²±â¸¦ µ¿½Ã¿¡ Àâ´Â´Ù!

ÀڽŠÀÖ°Ô ¾µ ¼ö ÀÖ´Â ¿µÀÛ¹®À» À§ÇØ ÆÄ¿öÀ×±Û¸®½¬ ¼ö¾÷À» ¼ö°­ÇϽôÂ
ȸ¿ø´Ôµé²² ¹«·á·Î Á¦°øÇص帮´Â ºÎ°¡ ¼­ºñ½º·Î, Àü¹® ºÐ¾ß¸¦ Á¦¿ÜÇÑ ÀÚÀ¯ ÁÖÁ¦
¶Ç´Â °­»ç´ÔÀÌ ³»Áֽô °úÁ¦¸¦ ȸ¿ø´Ô²²¼­ ¿µ¾î·Î ÀÛ¼ºÇØÁֽøé,
´ã´ç °­»ç ´Ô²²¼­ ¡®¹®¹ý ¿À·ù ±³Á¤¡¯ °ú ¡®´õ ³ªÀº ¿µ¾î½Ä Ç¥Çö¡¯À¸·Î ±³Á¤ÇØÁÖ´Â
¼­ºñ½º ÀÔ´Ï´Ù.

Homework

ÀÛ¼ºÀÚ: ±è*´Ô
2023-09-01 1048

ȸ¿ø´ÔÀÇ ¿µÀÛ¹®

Korean¡¯s obesity is increasing these days.
Originally it caused by genetic from their parents.
But thesedays eating style caused obesity.
There were many side dishes in Korea.
Most of them were made of plants.
But nowadays people prefer food that is made from meats,flour and oil.

°­»ç´ÔÀÇ Ã·»è±³Á¤ ³»¿ë

Happy Friday, Ms. Sunny!
They said that you become what you eat. We all have our cravings but we need to consider moderate eating especially if the food that we like brings more negative things in our body than good ones.
Stay well
Aki~


Korean¡¯s obesity is increasing these days.
>>> Korean obesity is increasing these days.

Originally it caused by genetic from their parents.
>>> Originally it was caused by genetics from their parents.

But thesedays eating style caused obesity.
>>> But these days eating style has caused obesity.

There were many side dishes in Korea.
>>> CORRECT!

Most of them were made of plants.
>>> CORRECT!

But nowadays people prefer food that is made from meats, flour and oil.
>>> CORRECT!

¹øÈ£ Á¦¸ñ ±Û¾´ÀÌ °ø°³ »óÅ µî·ÏÀÏ Á¶È¸¼ö
130692 If you were working and someone will give you a tip, will you... ÀÌ*ÁÖ ¿Ï·á 2023-09-01 1
130691 What do you think is interesting about your culture? ½Å*¼· ¿Ï·á 2023-09-01 944
130690 HOMEWORK: Please write a short paragraph about \"What I like... ¾Ù* ¿Ï·á 2023-09-01 2
130689 Homework ÀÌ*°æ ¿Ï·á 2023-09-01 1425
130688 1 ÀÌ*Àº ¿Ï·á 2023-09-01 1141
130687 Homework JA*UNG CHUNG ¿Ï·á 2023-09-01 1455
130686 HOMEWORK: Writing Exercise: How do you stay motivated during... ¼­*ÅÃ ¿Ï·á 2023-09-01 987
130685 HOMEWORK: Writing Exercise: What is the most difficult job in... ¼­*ÅÃ ¿Ï·á 2023-09-01 1056
130684 HOMEWORK: Writing Exercise: Describe the best character from... ¼­*ÅÃ ¿Ï·á 2023-09-01 921
130683 WRITING TASK: What do you want to buy these days? ÀÓ*Áö ¿Ï·á 2023-09-01 4
130682 What animals are going extinct because of human activities and... ±è*°æ ¿Ï·á 2023-09-01 956
130681 food ±Ç*Èñ ¿Ï·á 2023-09-01 1221
130680 Homework ½Å*È­ ¿Ï·á 2023-09-01 849
130679 Homework ±è*´Ô ¿Ï·á 2023-09-01 1048
130678 How do you feel about service dogs and their role in society? ±è*±Ô ¿Ï·á 2023-09-01 1
130677 How necessary is internet in this modern time? ÃÖ*Àº ¿Ï·á 2023-09-01 857
130676 Homework ±è*¿ì ¿Ï·á 2023-08-31 782
130675 Next girl friend ÃÖ*ȯ ¿Ï·á 2023-08-31 923
130674 homework 08.31 ÃÖ*Ç ¿Ï·á 2023-08-31 1036
130673 Do you worry about where the food you eat comes from? ¿¡*¹Ì ¿Ï·á 2023-08-31 2

HOW TO USE IT?

[¸¶ÀÌÆäÀÌÁö > ¼ö¾÷ ³»¿ë º¸±â > ÇнÀ Ķ¸°´õ > ¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ ¹öÆ° Ŭ¸¯]

¼ö¾÷ Ƚ¼ö¸¸Å­ ¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ °Ô½ÃÆÇÀÌ »ý¼ºµÇ¸ç,
Áö³­ ³¯Â¥¿¡µµ °Ô½Ã ÇÒ ¼ö ÀÖ½À´Ï´Ù.

ÁÖ5ȸ ¼ö¾÷ : ¿ù 20ȸ ÀÌ¿ë °¡´É
ÁÖ3ȸ ¼ö¾÷ : ¿ù 12ȸ ÀÌ¿ë °¡´É
ÁÖ2ȸ ¼ö¾÷ : ¿ù 08ȸ ÀÌ¿ë °¡´É
01
±³Á¤ ³»¿ëÀº ÃÖ´ë 1,000byte±îÁö ¿Ã¸± ¼ö ÀÖ½À´Ï´Ù.

÷ºÎ ÆÄÀÏÀº ¿øÈ°ÇÑ Ã·»èÀ» À§ÇÑ Âü°íÀÚ·á·Î »ç¿ëµÉ »Ó,
ÆÄÀÏ¿¡ ´ëÇÑ Ã·»èÀº ºÒ°¡´É ÇÕ´Ï´Ù.

¾÷·Îµå °¡´ÉÇÑ Ã·ºÎ ÆÄÀÏÀº ÃÖ´ë 2mb±îÁöÀ̸ç,
÷ºÎ ÇÒ ¼ö ÀÖ´Â ÆÄÀÏ Çü½ÄÀº ´ÙÀ½°ú °°½À´Ï´Ù.

¹®¼­ - PDF, TXT, DOCX,
À̹ÌÁö - JPEG, PNG, GIF
02
Àü¹® ºÐ¾ß¸¦ Á¦¿ÜÇÑ È¸¿ø´ÔÀÌ Á÷Á¢ ÀÛ¼ºÇÑ ±Û¸¸
÷»èÀÌ °¡´ÉÇϸç,

¿Ã·ÁÁֽŠ±ÛÀÇ °­»ç´Ô ÷»èÀº 24½Ã°£ À̳»¿¡
¿Ï·á µÇ´Â °ÍÀ» ¿øÄ¢À¸·Î ÇÏ°í ÀÖ½À´Ï´Ù.
03
ÇÏ·ç °Ô½Ã °¡´ÉÇÑ ±ÛÀº 3ȸ±îÁö À̸ç,
Á¾·áµÈ ¼ö¾÷ÀÇ ¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ °Ô½ÃÆÇÀº
ÀÌ¿ëÀÌ ¾î·Á¿î Á¡ ¾çÇØ ºÎŹ µå¸³´Ï´Ù.
04