¹«·á ·¹º§Å×½ºÆ® ¹Þ°í °­»çÆò°¡ ³²±â¸é 1,OOO¿ø ÄíÆù Áï½Ã Àû¸³!

Ȥ½Ã »çÀÌÆ®¿¡¼± ãÁö ¸øÇÑ ±Ã±ÝÇÑ Á¡ÀÌ ÀÖÀ¸¼¼¿ä?
³²°ÜÁֽŠÀ̸ÞÀÏÀ» ÅëÇØ ´äº¯ µå¸®°Ú½À´Ï´Ù.

¹®ÀÇÇϽŠ³»¿ëÀÌ ¹®ÀÚ·Î ¹ß¼ÛµÇ¿À´Ï
¿¬¶ôó¸¦ ³²°ÜÁÖ¼¼¿ä.
¾÷¹«½Ã°£ ¿ù~±Ý ¿ÀÀü9½Ã~¿ÀÈÄ6½Ã
(Á¡½É½Ã°£ ³·12½Ã~¿ÀÈÄ1½Ã)

¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ °Ô½ÃÆÇ

¿µ¾î ¸»Çϱâ¿Í ¾²±â¸¦ µ¿½Ã¿¡ Àâ´Â´Ù!

ÀڽŠÀÖ°Ô ¾µ ¼ö ÀÖ´Â ¿µÀÛ¹®À» À§ÇØ ÆÄ¿öÀ×±Û¸®½¬ ¼ö¾÷À» ¼ö°­ÇϽôÂ
ȸ¿ø´Ôµé²² ¹«·á·Î Á¦°øÇص帮´Â ºÎ°¡ ¼­ºñ½º·Î, Àü¹® ºÐ¾ß¸¦ Á¦¿ÜÇÑ ÀÚÀ¯ ÁÖÁ¦
¶Ç´Â °­»ç´ÔÀÌ ³»Áֽô °úÁ¦¸¦ ȸ¿ø´Ô²²¼­ ¿µ¾î·Î ÀÛ¼ºÇØÁֽøé,
´ã´ç °­»ç ´Ô²²¼­ ¡®¹®¹ý ¿À·ù ±³Á¤¡¯ °ú ¡®´õ ³ªÀº ¿µ¾î½Ä Ç¥Çö¡¯À¸·Î ±³Á¤ÇØÁÖ´Â
¼­ºñ½º ÀÔ´Ï´Ù.

Homework

ÀÛ¼ºÀÚ: ±è*¿ì
2023-08-31 572

ȸ¿ø´ÔÀÇ ¿µÀÛ¹®

Hello.
How was your day?
As I predicted, I had a hectic day.
Because there were four days vacation last month, the profit of this month should have been higher than last one.
It seemed to be impossible to make more money than last month by yesterday though.
Fortunately, we achived to beat the last month today eventually.
Dr. MJ looked very happy, and I felt good, too.
Meanwhile, I was fatigued all day and I had much myalgia on whole body.
You know the reasons.
Nevertheless, I will never regret what I did yesterday.
When I met a friend who lost his father, he really seemed to be comforted.
And, intensive exercise made much pain of my muscles, nontheless, I felt I became healthier.
Also, we can have an achievement during workout.
Repetative achievements can make a success in our lives, I am sure.
With our effort and time, exercise gives us the definate result than anything.
Of course, we don't do that immediately despite we know that.
Do you workout sometimes for your health?
See you.

°­»ç´ÔÀÇ Ã·»è±³Á¤ ³»¿ë

Hi, Dr. Kim!

I had a fantastic day yesterday. It was not quite hectic and we went to a snack buffet and ate our hearts out with my son, sisters, and my nephew. It is our simple pleasure amidst our busy schedules at work. On the other hand, you were working all day long computing your revenue for the month of August. Congratulations to you and your clinical staff! You have done it again and will continue to do so every month of all the years.

Meanwhile, we have heard, read, and learned about the countless benefits of working out yet, we still fail to do it as you have said. In this capitalist world, we barely have time to pay attention to make ourselves healthy since we have to immerse ourselves to a lot of time devoted to work. Yet, as our body is our first business and our home, we should never neglect keeping it in shape similarly to a house that needs maintenance and care every now and then.

Right now, enjoy the fatigue and never let it defeat you and your goal to stay healthy and active. Experts say that exercise is not about the intensity but the frequency of this action that matters more to achieve the best results.

Thus, let us stay fit and healthy for our selves towards our family.

I have some grammar comments and suggestions below. Kindly read them with intent and keenness. You did excellent as usual!

I will see you next week!

-T. Donna~

Hello.
>> Correct!

How was your day?
>> Correct!

As I predicted, I had a hectic day.
>> Correct!

Because there were four days vacation last month, the profit of this month should have been higher than last one.
>> Because there were four days of vacation last month, the profit of this month should have been higher than the last one. Very good sentence! 

It seemed to be impossible to make more money than last month by yesterday though.
>> Correct!
Or: It seemed to be impossible to make more money than last month until yesterday though.

Fortunately, we achived to beat the last month today eventually.
>>Fortunately, we achieved to beat last month today eventually.

Dr. MJ looked very happy, and I felt good, too.
>> Correct!

Meanwhile, I was fatigued all day and I had much myalgia on whole body.
>> Meanwhile, I was fatigued all day and I had much myalgia on my whole body.

You know the reasons.
>> Correct!

Nevertheless, I will never regret what I did yesterday.
>> Correct!

When I met a friend who lost his father, he really seemed to be comforted.
>> Correct!

And, intensive exercise made much pain of my muscles, nontheless, I felt I became healthier.
>> Correct!
Or: nonetheless

Also, we can have an achievement during workout.
>> Correct!

Repetative achievements can make a success in our lives, I am sure.
>> Correct!

With our effort and time, exercise gives us the definate result than anything.
>> Correct!
Or: With our effort and time, exercise gives us a definite result more than anything.

Of course, we don't do that immediately despite we know that.
>> Of course, we don't do that immediately despite knowing that.

Do you workout sometimes for your health?
>> Correct!

See you.
>> Correct!
¹øÈ£ Á¦¸ñ ±Û¾´ÀÌ °ø°³ »óÅ µî·ÏÀÏ Á¶È¸¼ö
132200 WRITING TASK: What was the fondest memory you had with your... ÀÓ*Áö ¿Ï·á 2023-11-06 4
132199 Homework ½Å*È­ ¿Ï·á 2023-11-06 1538
132198 Homework ½Å*È­ ¿Ï·á 2023-11-06 981
132197 A valuable lesson or piece of advice you\\\'ve learned... ÀÓ*Áø ¿Ï·á 2023-11-06 3278
132196 Homework Á¤*ȯ ¿Ï·á 2023-11-06 1081
132195 What is something that you regret in the past that you want to... Á¶*Áö ¿Ï·á 2023-11-06 0
132194 03.Nov.2023 ±è*Á¤ ¿Ï·á 2023-11-06 1
132193 retirement ±Ç*Èñ ¿Ï·á 2023-11-06 1821
132192 my best running time ÃÖ*ȯ ¿Ï·á 2023-11-06 961
132191 Are there any movies that you can watch over and over again... ÀÌ*¿ø ¿Ï·á 2023-11-05 1
132190 Should employers set aside time during the day for their... ±è*±Ô ¿Ï·á 2023-11-05 1
132189 What do you think the differences are between male and female... À±*¿ø ¿Ï·á 2023-11-05 3
132188 Good to experience diversity °­*À² ¿Ï·á 2023-11-05 1
132187 homework ¾È*¼÷ ¿Ï·á 2023-11-05 1059
132186 What aspects of your city would you complain about? ±Ç*Áö ¿Ï·á 2023-11-05 1074
132185 Homework ±è*¿ì ¿Ï·á 2023-11-05 1524
132184 HOMEWORK FOR 11.03.2023 WRITING TASK: Would you feel bad if... ÀÓ*Áö ¿Ï·á 2023-11-05 4
132183 What are the dangers of swimming to the open water alone? ±è*±¹ ¿Ï·á 2023-11-04 1
132182 How can you protect yourself from dangers abroad? ½Å*¼· ¿Ï·á 2023-11-04 1478
132181 Why is financial stability important? ½Å*¼· ¿Ï·á 2023-11-04 1813

HOW TO USE IT?

[¸¶ÀÌÆäÀÌÁö > ¼ö¾÷ ³»¿ë º¸±â > ÇнÀ Ķ¸°´õ > ¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ ¹öÆ° Ŭ¸¯]

¼ö¾÷ Ƚ¼ö¸¸Å­ ¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ °Ô½ÃÆÇÀÌ »ý¼ºµÇ¸ç,
Áö³­ ³¯Â¥¿¡µµ °Ô½Ã ÇÒ ¼ö ÀÖ½À´Ï´Ù.

ÁÖ5ȸ ¼ö¾÷ : ¿ù 20ȸ ÀÌ¿ë °¡´É
ÁÖ3ȸ ¼ö¾÷ : ¿ù 12ȸ ÀÌ¿ë °¡´É
ÁÖ2ȸ ¼ö¾÷ : ¿ù 08ȸ ÀÌ¿ë °¡´É
01
±³Á¤ ³»¿ëÀº ÃÖ´ë 1,000byte±îÁö ¿Ã¸± ¼ö ÀÖ½À´Ï´Ù.

÷ºÎ ÆÄÀÏÀº ¿øÈ°ÇÑ Ã·»èÀ» À§ÇÑ Âü°íÀÚ·á·Î »ç¿ëµÉ »Ó,
ÆÄÀÏ¿¡ ´ëÇÑ Ã·»èÀº ºÒ°¡´É ÇÕ´Ï´Ù.

¾÷·Îµå °¡´ÉÇÑ Ã·ºÎ ÆÄÀÏÀº ÃÖ´ë 2mb±îÁöÀ̸ç,
÷ºÎ ÇÒ ¼ö ÀÖ´Â ÆÄÀÏ Çü½ÄÀº ´ÙÀ½°ú °°½À´Ï´Ù.

¹®¼­ - PDF, TXT, DOCX,
À̹ÌÁö - JPEG, PNG, GIF
02
Àü¹® ºÐ¾ß¸¦ Á¦¿ÜÇÑ È¸¿ø´ÔÀÌ Á÷Á¢ ÀÛ¼ºÇÑ ±Û¸¸
÷»èÀÌ °¡´ÉÇϸç,

¿Ã·ÁÁֽŠ±ÛÀÇ °­»ç´Ô ÷»èÀº 24½Ã°£ À̳»¿¡
¿Ï·á µÇ´Â °ÍÀ» ¿øÄ¢À¸·Î ÇÏ°í ÀÖ½À´Ï´Ù.
03
ÇÏ·ç °Ô½Ã °¡´ÉÇÑ ±ÛÀº 3ȸ±îÁö À̸ç,
Á¾·áµÈ ¼ö¾÷ÀÇ ¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ °Ô½ÃÆÇÀº
ÀÌ¿ëÀÌ ¾î·Á¿î Á¡ ¾çÇØ ºÎŹ µå¸³´Ï´Ù.
04