¹«·á ·¹º§Å×½ºÆ® ¹Þ°í °­»çÆò°¡ ³²±â¸é 1,OOO¿ø ÄíÆù Áï½Ã Àû¸³!

Ȥ½Ã »çÀÌÆ®¿¡¼± ãÁö ¸øÇÑ ±Ã±ÝÇÑ Á¡ÀÌ ÀÖÀ¸¼¼¿ä?
³²°ÜÁֽŠÀ̸ÞÀÏÀ» ÅëÇØ ´äº¯ µå¸®°Ú½À´Ï´Ù.

¹®ÀÇÇϽŠ³»¿ëÀÌ ¹®ÀÚ·Î ¹ß¼ÛµÇ¿À´Ï
¿¬¶ôó¸¦ ³²°ÜÁÖ¼¼¿ä.
¾÷¹«½Ã°£ ¿ù~±Ý ¿ÀÀü9½Ã~¿ÀÈÄ6½Ã
(Á¡½É½Ã°£ ³·12½Ã~¿ÀÈÄ1½Ã)

¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ °Ô½ÃÆÇ

¿µ¾î ¸»Çϱâ¿Í ¾²±â¸¦ µ¿½Ã¿¡ Àâ´Â´Ù!

ÀڽŠÀÖ°Ô ¾µ ¼ö ÀÖ´Â ¿µÀÛ¹®À» À§ÇØ ÆÄ¿öÀ×±Û¸®½¬ ¼ö¾÷À» ¼ö°­ÇϽôÂ
ȸ¿ø´Ôµé²² ¹«·á·Î Á¦°øÇص帮´Â ºÎ°¡ ¼­ºñ½º·Î, Àü¹® ºÐ¾ß¸¦ Á¦¿ÜÇÑ ÀÚÀ¯ ÁÖÁ¦
¶Ç´Â °­»ç´ÔÀÌ ³»Áֽô °úÁ¦¸¦ ȸ¿ø´Ô²²¼­ ¿µ¾î·Î ÀÛ¼ºÇØÁֽøé,
´ã´ç °­»ç ´Ô²²¼­ ¡®¹®¹ý ¿À·ù ±³Á¤¡¯ °ú ¡®´õ ³ªÀº ¿µ¾î½Ä Ç¥Çö¡¯À¸·Î ±³Á¤ÇØÁÖ´Â
¼­ºñ½º ÀÔ´Ï´Ù.

homework 08.31

ÀÛ¼ºÀÚ: ÃÖ*Ç
2023-08-31 1661

ȸ¿ø´ÔÀÇ ¿µÀÛ¹®

~ Writing Task:
Please answer the question:
Who plays video games more, adults or children? Why?

In my opinion, adults play more video games using a game consoles more than children.
I think the reason is the memories.
Maybe we have these kinds of childhood memories.
When we was young, memories of not having what we wanted things.
Or the memories of having again the games or toys we enjoyed as a child.
It's called "Kidult" in these day's word.
Kidult is become a hobby these day's.
So, many adults play video games using a game consoles.
On the other hand, I think children also play games using a smartphone.
In other countries of case, I don't know well.
But In Korea, parents don't like children playing computer games at home.
So, children then to play games using a smartphones instead of game consoles and computer.

°­»ç´ÔÀÇ Ã·»è±³Á¤ ³»¿ë

Good day, Keon!
Thank you so much for taking time in answering the question. Your ideas and opinions are on point. Keep it up! :)
~ T. Camille

~ Writing Task:
Please answer the question:
Who plays video games more, adults or children? Why?


In my opinion, adults play more video games using a game consoles more than children.
>> In my opinion, adults play more video games using game consoles more than children.
I think the reason is the memories.
>> CORRECT!
Maybe we have these kinds of childhood memories.
>> CORRECT!
When we was young, memories of not having what we wanted things.
>> When we were young, we have memories of not having the things we wanted.
Or the memories of having again the games or toys we enjoyed as a child.
>> Or we may also have the memories of having the games or toys we enjoyed as a child.
It's called "Kidult" in these day's word.
>> CORRECT!
Kidult is become a hobby these day's.
>> Kidult has become a hobby these days.
So, many adults play video games using a game consoles.
>> So, many adults play video games using game consoles
On the other hand, I think children also play games using a smartphone.
>> CORRECT!
In other countries of case, I don't know well.
>> In other countries' case, I don't know it well.
But In Korea, parents don't like children playing computer games at home.
>> CORRECT!
So, children then to play games using a smartphones instead of game consoles and computer.
>> So, children tend to play games using smartphones instead of game consoles and computer.
¹øÈ£ Á¦¸ñ ±Û¾´ÀÌ °ø°³ »óÅ µî·ÏÀÏ Á¶È¸¼ö
138090 HOMEWORK FOR 06.21.2024 WRITING TASK: Do you believe in bad... ÀÓ*Áö ¿Ï·á 2024-06-26 4
138089 What kinds of crimes are increasing? Á¤*¾Æ ¿Ï·á 2024-06-26 2163
138088 Is there a difference between ceremonial formal wear and... ¹Ú*È£ ¿Ï·á 2024-06-26 1739
138087 Where in the world would you most like to go for your next... Ȳ*Àº ¿Ï·á 2024-06-26 1710
138086 The influence of influncers ¾ç*¿¬ ¿Ï·á 2024-06-26 1290
138085 HOMEWORK Á¤*ȯ ¿Ï·á 2024-06-26 1223
138084 Page 64 ±è*Áø ¿Ï·á 2024-06-26 1
138083 The best way to make the road transport of goods safer is to ask... ÀÌ*´Ã ¿Ï·á 2024-06-25 1204
138082 Homework ¿À*º½ ¿Ï·á 2024-06-25 1
138081 homework ±è*¿¬ ¿Ï·á 2024-06-25 1021
138080 Do you think buffet restaurants are worth their price? Why or... Çö* ¿Ï·á 2024-06-25 1273
138079 Household duties ÀÌ*±Ô ¿Ï·á 2024-06-25 1371
138078 Homework ±è*¼­ ¿Ï·á 2024-06-25 3
138077 Homework ³ª*¿ø ¿Ï·á 2024-06-25 0
138076 What kind of movies do you like watching at a movie theater? ÀÓ*È£ ¿Ï·á 2024-06-25 1239
138075 Homework ±Ç*¹Ì ¿Ï·á 2024-06-25 0
138074 Homework ±Ç*¹Ì ¿Ï·á 2024-06-25 0
138073 purchases ¹Î*Á¤ ¿Ï·á 2024-06-25 0
138072 What fruit or fruits that aren\'t available in Korea would you... Â÷*Çõ ¿Ï·á 2024-06-25 1234
138071 What are the things you enjoy most? Write at least two and... Â÷*Áø ¿Ï·á 2024-06-25 1189

HOW TO USE IT?

[¸¶ÀÌÆäÀÌÁö > ¼ö¾÷ ³»¿ë º¸±â > ÇнÀ Ķ¸°´õ > ¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ ¹öÆ° Ŭ¸¯]

¼ö¾÷ Ƚ¼ö¸¸Å­ ¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ °Ô½ÃÆÇÀÌ »ý¼ºµÇ¸ç,
Áö³­ ³¯Â¥¿¡µµ °Ô½Ã ÇÒ ¼ö ÀÖ½À´Ï´Ù.

ÁÖ5ȸ ¼ö¾÷ : ¿ù 20ȸ ÀÌ¿ë °¡´É
ÁÖ3ȸ ¼ö¾÷ : ¿ù 12ȸ ÀÌ¿ë °¡´É
ÁÖ2ȸ ¼ö¾÷ : ¿ù 08ȸ ÀÌ¿ë °¡´É
01
±³Á¤ ³»¿ëÀº ÃÖ´ë 1,000byte±îÁö ¿Ã¸± ¼ö ÀÖ½À´Ï´Ù.

÷ºÎ ÆÄÀÏÀº ¿øÈ°ÇÑ Ã·»èÀ» À§ÇÑ Âü°íÀÚ·á·Î »ç¿ëµÉ »Ó,
ÆÄÀÏ¿¡ ´ëÇÑ Ã·»èÀº ºÒ°¡´É ÇÕ´Ï´Ù.

¾÷·Îµå °¡´ÉÇÑ Ã·ºÎ ÆÄÀÏÀº ÃÖ´ë 2mb±îÁöÀ̸ç,
÷ºÎ ÇÒ ¼ö ÀÖ´Â ÆÄÀÏ Çü½ÄÀº ´ÙÀ½°ú °°½À´Ï´Ù.

¹®¼­ - PDF, TXT, DOCX,
À̹ÌÁö - JPEG, PNG, GIF
02
Àü¹® ºÐ¾ß¸¦ Á¦¿ÜÇÑ È¸¿ø´ÔÀÌ Á÷Á¢ ÀÛ¼ºÇÑ ±Û¸¸
÷»èÀÌ °¡´ÉÇϸç,

¿Ã·ÁÁֽŠ±ÛÀÇ °­»ç´Ô ÷»èÀº 24½Ã°£ À̳»¿¡
¿Ï·á µÇ´Â °ÍÀ» ¿øÄ¢À¸·Î ÇÏ°í ÀÖ½À´Ï´Ù.
03
ÇÏ·ç °Ô½Ã °¡´ÉÇÑ ±ÛÀº 3ȸ±îÁö À̸ç,
Á¾·áµÈ ¼ö¾÷ÀÇ ¿µÀÛ±³Á¤ °Ô½ÃÆÇÀº
ÀÌ¿ëÀÌ ¾î·Á¿î Á¡ ¾çÇØ ºÎŹ µå¸³´Ï´Ù.
04